Weight Loss Diary 2017 - Goal 1-0-5

misty22

Well-known member
I've been feeling off in terms of emotions and energy the past couple days. Yesterday was bad. I cried.
What triggered it is seeing clumps of hair in the shower. And then I think not hearing from T for the past few days.
I don't know why I expect men to suddenly fall in love with me, I get attached so easily.
 

Cate

Long-term member.
Seeing clumps of hair in the shower would be enough to make anyone cry. :grouphug:
I didn't think you were that keen on T, hon. If you were not obviously taken with him he may have picked that up. You are so worth loving. Please remember that xoxo
 

misty22

Well-known member
Seeing clumps of hair in the shower would be enough to make anyone cry. :grouphug:
I didn't think you were that keen on T, hon. If you were not obviously taken with him he may have picked that up. You are so worth loving. Please remember that xoxo

Thanks so much Cattteeeee xoxoxoxoxox I was not that keen on him, you are right. I feel like he was not that keen on me either and I picked up on that and therefore, was not that keen on him lol. I mean, I did initiate the second date to stop the breadcrumbing. I am turning 37 this year though and sometimes I think I should just settle. With whoever. My baby making years are almost at the end. It would be hard getting pregnant with PCOS anyways but you know, it would be nice to at least have the option/time to try to have kids naturally. I sometimes wonder why God put a pandemic in place, it's halted everyone's lives so much, so much death. I've lost almost two years of dating IRL.

My weight is stuck. At 113lbs. I'll try eating lighter today. I really want to lose 5lbs this month.

RE: jobs, just going to be aggressive over next few days and get apps out. I am waiting to hear back from a company and I have an interview next week but not nearly enough leads in the pipeline so got to get going.
 

Cate

Long-term member.
and sometimes I think I should just settle. With whoever.
I'm quite sure that you would not be happy with settling for just anybody. Keep looking, hon, keep sending out those job applications, keep being you.....xoxo
 

misty22

Well-known member
I'm quite sure that you would not be happy with settling for just anybody. Keep looking, hon, keep sending out those job applications, keep being you.....xoxo

I love you so much, thanks for the words of encouragement. I hope you were able to find a good therapist and your mental health is ok too xoxo
 

misty22

Well-known member
Well the fact that I am in the 112 range for a steady amount of time, the upside is I don't think I just lost water weight. I've had cheat meals and I am not starving myself. 7 more lbs to go!!

I'm hoping to speak to my naturopath soon as I have no idea what is going on with my body. I'm eating 80% clean - my cheat meals are rice crackers and salted almonds, they're not even what regular people would call cheat meals. They're just higher calorie and have vegetable oil. I may need more fibre in my diet as I have been having chicken with beets and sweet potatoes and that may be too starchy/sugary for my body. I bought some kale salad that I am going to throw into my salads. I also have some frozen broccoli.

But my day usually goes like:
Morning: apple or banana with 1/2 cup coffee
Mid-morning: celery juice
Afternoon: grilled chicken with beets
Snack: rice crackers / almonds
Evening: grilled chicken with avocado, beets and sweet potato
Snack: soup or apple

CW: 112.8lbs
 

misty22

Well-known member
The more I read about leaky gut and body inflammation and brain inflammation, the more I am convinced I need to give up on coffee. Sigh. I am down to half a cup a day with oat milk but ....what am I half ass-ing this process for. Need to go all in, withdrawals and all. I have to keep reminding myself that my body isn't like a healthy person's so I can't do what healthy people do...I have to be like that 1% of the pop.

Should be fun.

So I guess I'll start tomorrow and document my journey off of caffeine.
 

misty22

Well-known member
Well Wayfair just cancelled my interview...??

So dumb. Got a generic note saying they went with someone else lol - didn't even get to phone screening with them.

So will be looking at jobs today. It's all good. I took a bit of a hiatus last week and will be back on it this weekend.
 

misty22

Well-known member
Feeling nervous about interview tomorrow. Stress ate because of it. Regretting it all now :(

CW: 113.4 lbs - I have not been eating well the past two days and skipped out on exercise yesterday b/c I was working.

I'm visiting my parents soon for a couple of days and I'm not sure what diet will be like over there but I need to limit the processed foods, they're not sitting well with me in my stomach, having coffee, eggs and milk-based products is making my stomach ache - which is new. My stomach seems super sensitive. Ugh, can't wait for this interview to be done....I hate feeling anxious. I really hope I get this one...third round...

I have no more interviews lined up which is also leaving me a bit stressed but I have to remind myself, being stressed is not helping me get a job sooner. Just need to put in time into applications and networking.
 

Cate

Long-term member.
Anxiety is possibly causing the stomach issues. Try to feel calm & confident. You have skills & you will get a job soon. Have faith in yourself, hon :grouphug:
 

misty22

Well-known member
Anxiety is possibly causing the stomach issues. Try to feel calm & confident. You have skills & you will get a job soon. Have faith in yourself, hon :grouphug:

thanks Cate xoxo yeah, I'm just laying off the trigger foods for a bit
 

misty22

Well-known member
So today I woke up feeling depressed and then I thought to myself, no, I will fight through this.

I'll learn more about growth marketing, someone reached out to me for free work (I may consider for experience), and I'm just going to keep going with the networking. I want to start content creation and have a few pieces that I'm working on to get 'noticed' - I don't know if they're good but at this point, does it really matter? So here is my action plan:

1- Update resume
2- Network
3- Apply to remote jobs
4- Learn more about growth marketing
5- Create content online - I may even try my hand at video content (TBD)

I'm tired of living in fear and scarcity mode. I'm sure things will settle once I have employment but until then, I don't want to feel bad. I'd just rather take action and help others in the meantime.

Also, re: weight- I'm hovering around 112lbs/113lbs. I need to make a strict attempt to get down by 7- 8lbs. It'll be easier after I visit my parents. But I need to be stricter with my calorie intake and keep the exercise consistent (at least 3 miles a day).

Re: diet, I seem to be reacting to a lot of stuff lately, I can't wait to see my GI MAP to see if I have any bacteria in my stomach that is affecting my stomach acid or if it's simply a matter of bringing stomach acid levels up. The latter is way easier than trying to eradicate a bacteria. I spent a year trying to clean up my gut but I don't know if I have been re-infected. Anyways, from a diet perspective, it's just eating lots of veggies, fruit, meat and incorporating celery juice, nothing too different from what I am doing today except cutting out processed foods (rice crackers, popcorn... coffee...)
 
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misty22

Well-known member
Weight loss went off rails at parent's place. CW 115.4lbs - so three lbs higher than earlier in the week.

I'm starting to transition back to the healthier food. Slowly will be starting to come off coffee and grains all over again. It's ok. I'm going to give myself a week. My period is no where in sight so I will need to

CW: 115lbs
GW: 105lbs
 

Milanica

New member
Hi! You really are very close to your goal weight. I'm sure that with some adjustments to your diet you will achieve it in a month or two. Lucky you!
We are the same age and in the similar position when it comes to dating or so it seems. Pandemic really took us two valuable years, but it will be ok. I'm also thinking about children, but hope things will turn out fine.

I was without a job for a while, but found one in the previous year. I'm sure you will find it soon.
Where are you from?

Wish you all the best!
 

misty22

Well-known member
Hi! You really are very close to your goal weight. I'm sure that with some adjustments to your diet you will achieve it in a month or two. Lucky you!
We are the same age and in the similar position when it comes to dating or so it seems. Pandemic really took us two valuable years, but it will be ok. I'm also thinking about children, but hope things will turn out fine.

I was without a job for a while, but found one in the previous year. I'm sure you will find it soon.
Where are you from?

Wish you all the best!

Hey there Milanica, nice to meet you! Where are you based? I'm in Toronto, and thank you for your kind words. I have PCOS and weight and hormones are harder to manage than the regular person but I appreciate your encouragement!
 

Milanica

New member
I'm sorry to hear about PCOS, and really hope you will find am eating regime that works out for you.
I'm from Belgrade, Serbia, but hopefully I am moving to Barcelona in a few months.
 

misty22

Well-known member
CW: 114.6lbs

I feel very depressed today. I lost a lot of hair in the shower, I feel tired, I haven't heard from the company I did multiple rounds with, I pulled the plug on the coffee machine this afternoon as I attempt to go caffeine-free (but I did have half a cup this morning). I'm tired. Not going to job hunt today as I feel worn down but going to rest. Period is late, as usual :( Volunteer work didn't go well today, got in trouble because of someone else's mistake and some miscommunication. So yeah today was pretty much a crap day.
 

Cate

Long-term member.
Oh, honey :grouphug:
Can you just go for a pleasant walk & not think about anything at all?
 
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