Emily Rose: The Reboot
- Thread starter Emilyrose
- Start date
Wow, you're on a wonderful roll! Fantastic news that you are using tennis to motivate yourself to eat and sleep healthy!!! It's something you are enthused about, so I think you'll do great! Sorry I missed so many posts. I really hate when the little bell thingy doesn't alert me that people posted like it should. Love the music video - he reminds me of Nick Drake. Anyway, so happy things are going so great health-wise!
- Thanks Cate. I hope so.
- Thanks Marsia. 'So great' might not be entirely accurate, but I am trying anyway.
No smoking or drinking yesterday, and today, I am feeling the craving monster beginning to call. I've resisted so far but not sure I will be able to continue all weekend. I'm just trying to take it moment by moment. It is an overwhelming feeling.
On a better note, I had an excellent sleep. I went home to my parents' house, where my bedroom is a lot cooler and quieter. I've had some cereal and a coffee for breakfast, and might get lunch in town in a while. I have a voucher for a bookshop, so I'm going to use it to get Andre Agassi's biography Open and maybe something else if I spot something good.
I sorted out my motor tax this morning, which is a huge job that I've been trying to sort out for ages, so the weekend is a success based on that alone. I'm playing tennis later today. It is extremely hot today. It's going to be extremely hot for the next few days. It's nice to actually have a summer for once, but we're not used to it! I am definitely going for a swim in the sea in the morning.
Dinner this evening should be the rest of the prawns and a stir-fry. Might have rice with it or the sweet potato, not sure. The evening seems so empty when I contemplate it without cigarettes. Gah! But do I want to win? Do I want to win? Of course I do.
Anyway, at least I've had a bit of a break from the badness. I'm sitting here with my mum now, she's a bit bored. She's lacking a sense of purpose. It's not easy to retire and not be able to do everything you used to do anymore. Getting old is no joke. Every time I come home, one of them seem to have a new ailment. I need to appreciate my youth a lot more. I guess not smoking would be a sign of that.
That's it really. I'll see how I get on for the rest of the day...
- Thanks Marsia. 'So great' might not be entirely accurate, but I am trying anyway.
No smoking or drinking yesterday, and today, I am feeling the craving monster beginning to call. I've resisted so far but not sure I will be able to continue all weekend. I'm just trying to take it moment by moment. It is an overwhelming feeling.
On a better note, I had an excellent sleep. I went home to my parents' house, where my bedroom is a lot cooler and quieter. I've had some cereal and a coffee for breakfast, and might get lunch in town in a while. I have a voucher for a bookshop, so I'm going to use it to get Andre Agassi's biography Open and maybe something else if I spot something good.
I sorted out my motor tax this morning, which is a huge job that I've been trying to sort out for ages, so the weekend is a success based on that alone. I'm playing tennis later today. It is extremely hot today. It's going to be extremely hot for the next few days. It's nice to actually have a summer for once, but we're not used to it! I am definitely going for a swim in the sea in the morning.
Dinner this evening should be the rest of the prawns and a stir-fry. Might have rice with it or the sweet potato, not sure. The evening seems so empty when I contemplate it without cigarettes. Gah! But do I want to win? Do I want to win? Of course I do.
Anyway, at least I've had a bit of a break from the badness. I'm sitting here with my mum now, she's a bit bored. She's lacking a sense of purpose. It's not easy to retire and not be able to do everything you used to do anymore. Getting old is no joke. Every time I come home, one of them seem to have a new ailment. I need to appreciate my youth a lot more. I guess not smoking would be a sign of that.
That's it really. I'll see how I get on for the rest of the day...
Em, have you ever tried nicotine patches? Also, I really think substituting a more healthy ritual for the old one helps immensely with urges. For instance, I sometimes make a pot of tea and sit and have that on the porch leisurely, or I make ice water and sit and relax while I crunch up all the ice because I want something to chew on, and the ice is very satisfying. When I'm out I get a nonsweetened ice tea with lemon and crunch on the ice. I've wondered watching my mom smoke if part of the draw is the deep breathing and long exhaling while smoking. I wonder if deep breathing nice fresh air would be a good routine to substitute? Or maybe doing something with your hands like knitting or crochet while rocking in a rocking chair? I think that finding some really relaxing ritual would help with that empty feeling you are describing. A bubble bath and a tea while reading, ...
I used to get my mom out walking with me when she got like that or out shopping. She loved taking walks in nature. I know what you mean about ailments. It was so hard watching my mom get older and frailer, but good to have that time with her. You're so right to think of the youth we have left and that we need to nurture ourselves and enjoy having healthy bodies!
I know I get carried away with encouragement, but I do think you are finding your "why" of weight loss and desire to be healthy in general, and I think the "why" is very necessary. I am not good at just white knuckling my way through weight loss - I need a real motivating force to inspire me. I was reading something on how identity can help a lot with motivation. When I think of myself as a gardener it really gets me out in my element exercising and being in nature. I think you identifying as a tennis player gets you to take care of your body as your instrument, so it's a win even if you are not always seeing it in your tennis tournaments yet.
I used to get my mom out walking with me when she got like that or out shopping. She loved taking walks in nature. I know what you mean about ailments. It was so hard watching my mom get older and frailer, but good to have that time with her. You're so right to think of the youth we have left and that we need to nurture ourselves and enjoy having healthy bodies!
I know I get carried away with encouragement, but I do think you are finding your "why" of weight loss and desire to be healthy in general, and I think the "why" is very necessary. I am not good at just white knuckling my way through weight loss - I need a real motivating force to inspire me. I was reading something on how identity can help a lot with motivation. When I think of myself as a gardener it really gets me out in my element exercising and being in nature. I think you identifying as a tennis player gets you to take care of your body as your instrument, so it's a win even if you are not always seeing it in your tennis tournaments yet.
Marsia, I love the encouragement, so never worry about that. I know you are trying your best to help me.
I've found my "why" - I want to win a tournament sooner rather than later. The "how" is the part I am really struggling with.
Today I got a free cupcake so I feel like that's the Universe conspiring to keep me plump and happy. Lol. I do like free cupcakes though.
I got asked the dreaded question this evening, 'How is your love life?' 'Stagnant', was my reply. What else is there to be said?
Today was probably the hottest day of the year. Work was hell because the office was so hot, but I went to town after work and got food outside and a few pints, wearing just a dress and it was just glorious. I walked some of the way into town and had a little walk off this bus this evening, so at least I was moving a bit. I got the bus at 22.50 pm and I still didn't need a jacket while waiting for it. That never happens in Ireland.
Andre Agassi's book is so great, I am loving it. So well-written and exciting. I actually don't know the ins and outs of the matches he's played and won or lost, which makes it even better. Would highly recommend, even if you have no interest in tennis.
He writes a lot about self-talk and that he has won many a match in the long shower he takes the day of a game. I'm going to start to employ this technique, hehe. The weird thing is that I have all the confidence in the world that I am going to win a tournament very soon, contrary to the evidence. A scientist or a bookie wouldn't give me a chance. They don't know how determined I am.
Not much else really. Food was mostly good, except for dinner and the four pints I had. I'm home in bed before devastation takes hold. I have to walk a bit to get my car in the morning, so I plan to run instead. Weather should be cooling slightly. It's 25 degrees right now. My room is so warm. Gonna read more of Andre and try to get to sleep soon.
I've found my "why" - I want to win a tournament sooner rather than later. The "how" is the part I am really struggling with.
Today I got a free cupcake so I feel like that's the Universe conspiring to keep me plump and happy. Lol. I do like free cupcakes though.
I got asked the dreaded question this evening, 'How is your love life?' 'Stagnant', was my reply. What else is there to be said?
Today was probably the hottest day of the year. Work was hell because the office was so hot, but I went to town after work and got food outside and a few pints, wearing just a dress and it was just glorious. I walked some of the way into town and had a little walk off this bus this evening, so at least I was moving a bit. I got the bus at 22.50 pm and I still didn't need a jacket while waiting for it. That never happens in Ireland.
Andre Agassi's book is so great, I am loving it. So well-written and exciting. I actually don't know the ins and outs of the matches he's played and won or lost, which makes it even better. Would highly recommend, even if you have no interest in tennis.
He writes a lot about self-talk and that he has won many a match in the long shower he takes the day of a game. I'm going to start to employ this technique, hehe. The weird thing is that I have all the confidence in the world that I am going to win a tournament very soon, contrary to the evidence. A scientist or a bookie wouldn't give me a chance. They don't know how determined I am.
Not much else really. Food was mostly good, except for dinner and the four pints I had. I'm home in bed before devastation takes hold. I have to walk a bit to get my car in the morning, so I plan to run instead. Weather should be cooling slightly. It's 25 degrees right now. My room is so warm. Gonna read more of Andre and try to get to sleep soon.
Cate
Long term member
Keep that tournament-winning plan in your head, Em. It's a good incentive. I'll order the Andre Agassi book today from the library. I always used to barrack for him.
Did you have dinner & beers on your own or go with your workmates? I hope it has cooled down enough for you to get some sleep. It has just got up to 1oC here at 9.32 am!
Did you have dinner & beers on your own or go with your workmates? I hope it has cooled down enough for you to get some sleep. It has just got up to 1oC here at 9.32 am!
Thanks Em! I know what you mean about the "how" part. I am coming to the conclusion that the "how" evolves over the course of a week, or even a day. I don't seem to be operating from the same facets in my personality for more than a couple of days, so how I go about doing things needs to change with my changing moods. It seems kind of like riding a bike and trying to keep balanced through different terrains. I guess eventually we'll know how to handle all the terrains well, and even anticipate for them, hopefully!
So weird how hot it is everywhere (except on the side of the globe where Cate is). We can't believe how here it can be raining and still be hot and muggy at the same time!
The Andre Agassi book sounds really interesting. I'd love to hear any big take-aways you get from the book! Hope it cools down a lot for your run!
- Hi Cate. It's cooled down a lot again. Our summers are brief. No, I went with a few friends. Wouldn't drink 4 beers out on my own! (I would drink them at home alone though, so that's not good.)
- Hi Marsia. The book was great, I finished it last night. My main takeaways were that even though he had his faults, he had such close relationships with his team, and I think that is something I am missing in my life. I don't have people that are that close to me anymore (except my parents). Which is probably my own fault, but anyway. Something to work on.
Anyway, yeah, you asked about Agassi, not me! Haha. He was cool, his love for Steffi Graf really shines through. I love all the good charity work he's doing. He was kind of forced into the tennis life by an overbearing father, and never really had a choice in the matter. But, I think by the end, he could see what tennis afforded him, and now he can put his millions into passion projects for the rest of his life. I enjoyed his take on the matches - we think of him as a great champion, but he had many, many losses! So that gives me hope.
I'm turning into a complete tennis nut. I am currently on the Rafa Nadal training academy website trying to figure out if I could afford to go there (Rafa drops in on occasion! How cool would that be!!!!!). Me and Dad are going to see the new McEnroe documentary on Saturday. Went to club night tonight, played very well overall. I think things are finally beginning to click for me.
The Emily Rose Tennis Academy is launching on Sunday. It's a 12 - 14 day program of healthy eating, as much tennis as I can fit in, and other exercise such as yoga, running, swimming and gym classes. I look forward to welcoming you on Sunday for the first day of the program. (I honestly think if I get 12 nights of good sleep in a row with a good diet and no wine or cigarettes, I can win this tournament. You can't get something for nothing.)
That's all for now. I did a colleague a small favour today which I feel really good about. We have a night out tomorrow, Saturday will be rest and recovery, and Sunday, we start training. See you on the court!
- Hi Marsia. The book was great, I finished it last night. My main takeaways were that even though he had his faults, he had such close relationships with his team, and I think that is something I am missing in my life. I don't have people that are that close to me anymore (except my parents). Which is probably my own fault, but anyway. Something to work on.
Anyway, yeah, you asked about Agassi, not me! Haha. He was cool, his love for Steffi Graf really shines through. I love all the good charity work he's doing. He was kind of forced into the tennis life by an overbearing father, and never really had a choice in the matter. But, I think by the end, he could see what tennis afforded him, and now he can put his millions into passion projects for the rest of his life. I enjoyed his take on the matches - we think of him as a great champion, but he had many, many losses! So that gives me hope.
I'm turning into a complete tennis nut. I am currently on the Rafa Nadal training academy website trying to figure out if I could afford to go there (Rafa drops in on occasion! How cool would that be!!!!!). Me and Dad are going to see the new McEnroe documentary on Saturday. Went to club night tonight, played very well overall. I think things are finally beginning to click for me.
The Emily Rose Tennis Academy is launching on Sunday. It's a 12 - 14 day program of healthy eating, as much tennis as I can fit in, and other exercise such as yoga, running, swimming and gym classes. I look forward to welcoming you on Sunday for the first day of the program. (I honestly think if I get 12 nights of good sleep in a row with a good diet and no wine or cigarettes, I can win this tournament. You can't get something for nothing.)
That's all for now. I did a colleague a small favour today which I feel really good about. We have a night out tomorrow, Saturday will be rest and recovery, and Sunday, we start training. See you on the court!
alligatorob
Respected Member
Where do we sign? Except that I have never played tennis I am pretty sure I'd do alright...
I like your plan, and am sure you will win.
Not from Ulster are you?
Cate
Long term member
I'm a big Rafa fan. That would be very cool!
My tennis days are but a distant memory. I was never very good so didn't persist. I wish you very well with the Emily Rose one-person tennis academy program
I feel similarly about having drifted away from a lot of close friends. It's so hard when we're all working, and very hard to find a close work environment. I really like that the tennis club could be that place for you! And love your tennis academy! I would join if I could!! One thing motivation people talk about that I want to try is picturing yourself already succeeding at your goals. So for me that will mean that I view it as a given that I'll get back to low weight, plant my orchard, and start doing art again. I can even picture some finished paintings! Anyway, I hope you find your inner Agassi both on and off the court!
- I'm sure you'd do great Rob. If that was me in the picture, I wouldn't be on this forum, haha.
- Thanks Cate. x
- Marsia - Let's both channel our inner Agassi. Looking forward to seeing those finished paintings!
I met a guy I used to work with tonight and we had a really nice chat. He has left the old company as well, he got a nice redundancy package because of Covid. I think he was kind of into me at one time, but he was also engaged, so that was never going to go anywhere. I like him as a friend and he's great to chat to, but I'm not too heartbroken about that one.
I also feel I made up with the girl in work that I had the argument with a while back. We spent a lot of time together on the night out and were both drinking and it didn't derail into another fight, which sometimes happens, so I will take that as a positive sign. She was there when I met the old colleague - he was very complimentary of me and hopefully it will give her more of an insight into my character and that I'm not that bad.
I had actually spotted him earlier in the night and kind of dreaded the idea of him coming over to talk to me because I felt that I looked so bad in comparison to how I looked before, but anyway, he was still nice, so it's all good. That's very shallow thinking anyway and something I need to move away from. I want people to find me attractive, but I also don't want that to be my defining characteristic. It's a weird one. I guess I know that when you get old, that particular card will be gone, and I want to have other things to rely on. I don't want to end up getting botox and lipo and lip fillers and god knows what else to try to keep myself relevant. I want to have more than that to offer the world.
Anyway, that was my night. Rest and recovery day tomorrow. I am going to get a nice lunch somewhere.
- Thanks Cate. x
- Marsia - Let's both channel our inner Agassi. Looking forward to seeing those finished paintings!
I met a guy I used to work with tonight and we had a really nice chat. He has left the old company as well, he got a nice redundancy package because of Covid. I think he was kind of into me at one time, but he was also engaged, so that was never going to go anywhere. I like him as a friend and he's great to chat to, but I'm not too heartbroken about that one.
I also feel I made up with the girl in work that I had the argument with a while back. We spent a lot of time together on the night out and were both drinking and it didn't derail into another fight, which sometimes happens, so I will take that as a positive sign. She was there when I met the old colleague - he was very complimentary of me and hopefully it will give her more of an insight into my character and that I'm not that bad.
I had actually spotted him earlier in the night and kind of dreaded the idea of him coming over to talk to me because I felt that I looked so bad in comparison to how I looked before, but anyway, he was still nice, so it's all good. That's very shallow thinking anyway and something I need to move away from. I want people to find me attractive, but I also don't want that to be my defining characteristic. It's a weird one. I guess I know that when you get old, that particular card will be gone, and I want to have other things to rely on. I don't want to end up getting botox and lipo and lip fillers and god knows what else to try to keep myself relevant. I want to have more than that to offer the world.
Anyway, that was my night. Rest and recovery day tomorrow. I am going to get a nice lunch somewhere.
Getting older is funny. In some ways it's so nice to be free of the worries about looking a certain way. You just don't, so I think it helps you disengage from that thing where your self worth is tied in to how you look. But losing strength, flexibility, balance, and stamina is scary. It really makes me want to work hard so I can stay as healthy as possible. I used to take it for granted that I'll have those things. Now it feels good to work hard to keep them as much as possible. It's good to have a longer term view of health.
And you have a lot to offer the world! You are funny, interesting, enthusiastic, forthright, and passionate, among other good traits.
Here some women have huge eyelashes - they look like big spiders caked in mascara. And the look is even more cartoonish when paired with push up bras. It's fascinating how social personas get added on to to become their own thing that takes on a life of its own. I really stink at cultivating a pubic persona, so I find the whole topic fascinating.
And you have a lot to offer the world! You are funny, interesting, enthusiastic, forthright, and passionate, among other good traits.
Here some women have huge eyelashes - they look like big spiders caked in mascara. And the look is even more cartoonish when paired with push up bras. It's fascinating how social personas get added on to to become their own thing that takes on a life of its own. I really stink at cultivating a pubic persona, so I find the whole topic fascinating.
- Marsia, you are too kind! Thank you. 
Guys, the Emily Rose Tennis Academy starts tomorrow. I'm scared.
I don't know if I can do this. Well, I know I can do this, but I know that switching gears like this can be really hard. But, it's really only two weeks, and I'm telling myself that I can go back to my old lifestyle afterwards if I want to. Which I'm hoping will keep me going. I really want to win this tournament and I am keeping that goal front and centre in my head for the next fortnight.
Some kind of fun news! I rang the cute coach today, he's so lovely. He's not free until September unfortunately, but when he was saying goodbye, he told me, 'In the meantime, keep banging away!' I got a laugh out of that. Tee hee. To be honest, the call kind of encouraged me even further with the ERTA program. I felt like he's kind of hovering there in the background, rooting for me.
Right, enough about that. I woke up in a heap this morning at 6 am, couldn't get back to sleep and felt sweaty and hungover. I got up at about 8 and made some scrambled eggs with cheese on toast and that kind of reset me some bit, and I went back to bed and slept for another few hours. So I don't feel too bad now. Not fresh exactly, but not awful either.
I did some shopping there and got a cheesecake and coffee (last day of freedom!) and I'm heading into town soon to go to the cinema. It's raining here today, so it's the perfect cinema day.
Day 1 of the program tomorrow will comprise the following:
Exercise:
- spin and yoga
- woodland walk
- tennis doubles
Food:
- porridge, milk, blackberries and blueberries
- apple
- baked trout with sweet potato fries and salad of beetroot, celery and cucumber
- natural yoghurt with cranberries and raspberries
- shepherd's pie with salad of peppers, sauerkraut and tomatoes
Drink:
- water only
It's going to be tough but plenty of natural sugar in the fruit and carbs at every meal, so hopefully I will get through it. I'll report back tomorrow.
Guys, the Emily Rose Tennis Academy starts tomorrow. I'm scared.
I don't know if I can do this. Well, I know I can do this, but I know that switching gears like this can be really hard. But, it's really only two weeks, and I'm telling myself that I can go back to my old lifestyle afterwards if I want to. Which I'm hoping will keep me going. I really want to win this tournament and I am keeping that goal front and centre in my head for the next fortnight.Some kind of fun news! I rang the cute coach today, he's so lovely. He's not free until September unfortunately, but when he was saying goodbye, he told me, 'In the meantime, keep banging away!' I got a laugh out of that. Tee hee. To be honest, the call kind of encouraged me even further with the ERTA program. I felt like he's kind of hovering there in the background, rooting for me.
Right, enough about that. I woke up in a heap this morning at 6 am, couldn't get back to sleep and felt sweaty and hungover. I got up at about 8 and made some scrambled eggs with cheese on toast and that kind of reset me some bit, and I went back to bed and slept for another few hours. So I don't feel too bad now. Not fresh exactly, but not awful either.
I did some shopping there and got a cheesecake and coffee (last day of freedom!) and I'm heading into town soon to go to the cinema. It's raining here today, so it's the perfect cinema day.
Day 1 of the program tomorrow will comprise the following:
Exercise:
- spin and yoga
- woodland walk
- tennis doubles
Food:
- porridge, milk, blackberries and blueberries
- apple
- baked trout with sweet potato fries and salad of beetroot, celery and cucumber
- natural yoghurt with cranberries and raspberries
- shepherd's pie with salad of peppers, sauerkraut and tomatoes
Drink:
- water only
It's going to be tough but plenty of natural sugar in the fruit and carbs at every meal, so hopefully I will get through it. I'll report back tomorrow.
- Haha, I'm so glad you're playing along with this, Cate. If inventing an imaginary tennis academy is what it takes to keep me on track, then so be it! 
- Yeah, I had to make some modifications, Marsia. But that's okay too.
Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to the first day of the Emily Rose Training Academy. I hope you all had a nice flight to get here and are looking forward to the two glorious weeks we have ahead of us. There's going to be some challenges, but we're going to have a lot of fun along the way. Let's take a recap on how the first day went.
Day 1:
9 am: I woke up a bit bleary-eyed and spent some time on my phone and reading.
9.45 am: Breakfast time! Decided to have an indulgent-enough breakfast because I felt that I needed it. It is day 1 after all! Had some over-ripe mango, porridge with blueberries, raspberries and milk, a slice of toast and butter, orange juice with baobab powder and some french press coffee with milk. Delicious!
11.15 am: Decided to do some Yoga with Adriene after a long absence. Did about 50 minutes. Felt a few twinges in the hip. It might be time to think about seeing a physio for it. I think it's moved slightly out of position. Does not bode well if I ever have a love life again. Haha.
12.30 pm: Drove to the local shopping centre and bought a few things in Tesco.
1 pm: Had lunch of a cajun chicken panini with crisps and coleslaw with a can of coke. Completely off plan but I've just accepted that it doesn't have to be 100% all of the time. At least no chips were involved!
2 pm: Had a slice of chocolate cake.
2.30 pm: Felt exhausted. Went for a long nap.
5 pm: Woke up feeling groggy and kind of awful. Cooked my dinner of shepherd's pie with a side salad of mixed leaves, tomatoes and peppers. Fun fact! The cake I had earlier had nearly as many calories as the shepherd's pie. Something to consider.
6.30 pm: Headed out the door for two hours of tennis.
7 pm: Doubles game. Pipped at the post. Final score 6-7. Played ok.
8 pm: Singles game against one of the best players in my club at the same grade as me. Lost the first set 1-6. Found my mojo in the second, and took it to 5-5. Ran out of steam and lost 5-7, but I was very happy with that. It's only day 1 after all. Will try to play her again before the tournament starts.
9.45 pm: Home and had a milky bar (25 g), dairy milk (53 g) and a cup of tea and milk. Not great, but it's not wine. Also smoked 4 cigarettes today. Will tackle that particular addiction issue later in the program.
Tomorrow, the basic plan is yoga in the morning and a game of singles after work. Food should be porridge again, mango, an apple, my mackerel salad (prepped earlier) and trout for dinner with a salad and the other slice of the chocolate cake.
Below is day 1's motivational song. (Fun fact. Pat Benatar is refusing to sing this live now as a protest against gun violence in the US. If you take it in the context of tennis only, it's perfect.)
I hope you all have a nice rest and will join me tomorrow for day 2.
- Yeah, I had to make some modifications, Marsia. But that's okay too.
Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to the first day of the Emily Rose Training Academy. I hope you all had a nice flight to get here and are looking forward to the two glorious weeks we have ahead of us. There's going to be some challenges, but we're going to have a lot of fun along the way. Let's take a recap on how the first day went.
Day 1:
9 am: I woke up a bit bleary-eyed and spent some time on my phone and reading.
9.45 am: Breakfast time! Decided to have an indulgent-enough breakfast because I felt that I needed it. It is day 1 after all! Had some over-ripe mango, porridge with blueberries, raspberries and milk, a slice of toast and butter, orange juice with baobab powder and some french press coffee with milk. Delicious!
11.15 am: Decided to do some Yoga with Adriene after a long absence. Did about 50 minutes. Felt a few twinges in the hip. It might be time to think about seeing a physio for it. I think it's moved slightly out of position. Does not bode well if I ever have a love life again. Haha.
12.30 pm: Drove to the local shopping centre and bought a few things in Tesco.
1 pm: Had lunch of a cajun chicken panini with crisps and coleslaw with a can of coke. Completely off plan but I've just accepted that it doesn't have to be 100% all of the time. At least no chips were involved!
2 pm: Had a slice of chocolate cake.
2.30 pm: Felt exhausted. Went for a long nap.
5 pm: Woke up feeling groggy and kind of awful. Cooked my dinner of shepherd's pie with a side salad of mixed leaves, tomatoes and peppers. Fun fact! The cake I had earlier had nearly as many calories as the shepherd's pie. Something to consider.
6.30 pm: Headed out the door for two hours of tennis.
7 pm: Doubles game. Pipped at the post. Final score 6-7. Played ok.
8 pm: Singles game against one of the best players in my club at the same grade as me. Lost the first set 1-6. Found my mojo in the second, and took it to 5-5. Ran out of steam and lost 5-7, but I was very happy with that. It's only day 1 after all. Will try to play her again before the tournament starts.
9.45 pm: Home and had a milky bar (25 g), dairy milk (53 g) and a cup of tea and milk. Not great, but it's not wine. Also smoked 4 cigarettes today. Will tackle that particular addiction issue later in the program.
Tomorrow, the basic plan is yoga in the morning and a game of singles after work. Food should be porridge again, mango, an apple, my mackerel salad (prepped earlier) and trout for dinner with a salad and the other slice of the chocolate cake.
Below is day 1's motivational song. (Fun fact. Pat Benatar is refusing to sing this live now as a protest against gun violence in the US. If you take it in the context of tennis only, it's perfect.)
I hope you all have a nice rest and will join me tomorrow for day 2.
Last edited:
Cate
Long term member
Do you think the chocolate cake made you need that nap, Em? Well done on playing so well in the singles match. That's a great comeback. I think my brain tells me that if I'm not drinking wine then I can have little indulgences. The trouble is they become bigger ones easily.
I like your tennis academy & I would love you to keep up the academy log. Too much chocolate cake & your Aussie offsider might have to advise though. Can you try to limit smokes to 2 a day?
I like your tennis academy & I would love you to keep up the academy log. Too much chocolate cake & your Aussie offsider might have to advise though. Can you try to limit smokes to 2 a day?
- No, don't think it was the chocolate cake, Cate. I was just exhausted. I smoked 18 cigarettes today (there were reasons) so 2 a day might not be realistic at this juncture.
It's been quite a day 2 here at the tennis academy. There's been arguments! Cleaning! Arguments about cleaning! And no tennis played, unfortunately. Find out the whole story in the recap below.
Day 2:
7 am Woke up to a text message that there's going to be an inspection of the tennis academy tomorrow. Terrible news. I sat in bed awhile absorbing the message and surveying the absolute demolition site that was my bedroom.
7.30 am Got up, had breakfast of porridge, blackberries, cranberries and milk, a glass of orange juice and a cup of coffee with milk.
8 am Shower.
9 am Work. Had an annoying email which kind of rattled me. Cup of instant coffee and milk.
10.30 am Two caramel biscuits. Another cup of instant and milk.
1 pm Forgot my lunch with the upset over the inspection. Went to the supermarket and got a ham salad sandwich and a caramello bar.
2 pm Back at the desk. Busy day.
3 pm Felt peckish, had nothing with me. Ended up getting a cup of tea and milk, a chocolate mallow and 5 sour patch kids. Didn't feel great after them.
5 pm Got the hell of out Dodge to face an evening of cleaning. Had to cancel my evening's tennis earlier as I knew I wouldn't have time, if I didn't want to be up half the night trying to finish it. Annoying.
6 pm Came home to see nothing had been cleaned in my absence. Blood started to boil slightly. Had some chocolate cake and cream to calm my nerves. Smoked quite a lot.
6.30 pm Started the cleaning process. Bedroom. Brought out bins. Cleaned shower. Nearly got sick. Mirrors. Hoovered my room. Made up the bed.
8.30 pm Massive argument with housemate when I broached the idea of a cleaning rota. I won't get into it now, but basically, I was accused of bossing her around. Her comment, 'I'm sorry you felt like you had to clean the shower, but no one asked you to do that' nearly tipped me over the edge. Both housemates were off all day. But the other housemate, to be fair to her, came in when I was cleaning the shower and apologised for not doing it, and then asked what else needed to be done. So that was cool. Anyway, disaster.
9.30 pm Had to leave the house after the argument. Sat by the lake, watched the ducks, smoked and had a can of coke.
10.30 pm Mum rang and I told her my tale of woe. We had a laugh about it in the end. Haha.
So yeah, not a fantastic day, but I felt the wine calling after the bust-up and I managed to say, 'No. You are going to deal with this by yourself.' And I did. Tomorrow, I can't see myself getting up for yoga, so I'm not going to put that in the plan. Breakfast should be porridge again, lunch will be the one I was meant to have today, and dinner is the trout and maybe rice and salad. The chocolate cake is gone. And I have tennis again in the evening.
Today's song is more of a wish for the future than anything, and this is a beautiful rendition by Jessie Buckley. Enjoy.
It's been quite a day 2 here at the tennis academy. There's been arguments! Cleaning! Arguments about cleaning! And no tennis played, unfortunately. Find out the whole story in the recap below.
Day 2:
7 am Woke up to a text message that there's going to be an inspection of the tennis academy tomorrow. Terrible news. I sat in bed awhile absorbing the message and surveying the absolute demolition site that was my bedroom.
7.30 am Got up, had breakfast of porridge, blackberries, cranberries and milk, a glass of orange juice and a cup of coffee with milk.
8 am Shower.
9 am Work. Had an annoying email which kind of rattled me. Cup of instant coffee and milk.
10.30 am Two caramel biscuits. Another cup of instant and milk.
1 pm Forgot my lunch with the upset over the inspection. Went to the supermarket and got a ham salad sandwich and a caramello bar.
2 pm Back at the desk. Busy day.
3 pm Felt peckish, had nothing with me. Ended up getting a cup of tea and milk, a chocolate mallow and 5 sour patch kids. Didn't feel great after them.
5 pm Got the hell of out Dodge to face an evening of cleaning. Had to cancel my evening's tennis earlier as I knew I wouldn't have time, if I didn't want to be up half the night trying to finish it. Annoying.
6 pm Came home to see nothing had been cleaned in my absence. Blood started to boil slightly. Had some chocolate cake and cream to calm my nerves. Smoked quite a lot.
6.30 pm Started the cleaning process. Bedroom. Brought out bins. Cleaned shower. Nearly got sick. Mirrors. Hoovered my room. Made up the bed.
8.30 pm Massive argument with housemate when I broached the idea of a cleaning rota. I won't get into it now, but basically, I was accused of bossing her around. Her comment, 'I'm sorry you felt like you had to clean the shower, but no one asked you to do that' nearly tipped me over the edge. Both housemates were off all day. But the other housemate, to be fair to her, came in when I was cleaning the shower and apologised for not doing it, and then asked what else needed to be done. So that was cool. Anyway, disaster.
9.30 pm Had to leave the house after the argument. Sat by the lake, watched the ducks, smoked and had a can of coke.
10.30 pm Mum rang and I told her my tale of woe. We had a laugh about it in the end. Haha.
So yeah, not a fantastic day, but I felt the wine calling after the bust-up and I managed to say, 'No. You are going to deal with this by yourself.' And I did. Tomorrow, I can't see myself getting up for yoga, so I'm not going to put that in the plan. Breakfast should be porridge again, lunch will be the one I was meant to have today, and dinner is the trout and maybe rice and salad. The chocolate cake is gone.
And I have tennis again in the evening.Today's song is more of a wish for the future than anything, and this is a beautiful rendition by Jessie Buckley. Enjoy.
The wheels are coming off a bit today at the academy. Had a minor spat on the court (my fault this time). Good stuff happened I guess. I'm ignoring the call of the wine but I don't feel good today.
Day 3
7.30 am Woke up from a nightmare where my housemate had washed a massive pile of dishes in some sort of restaurant kitchen and left them there for me to put away. Lol. Felt fresh enough even though it took me ages to get to sleep last night after the argument. I heard my housemate rustling around at 1 am in her room as well, so I guess she was also disturbed by the whole thing. Got up, jumped in the shower.
8.30 am Grabbed a nakd cocoa orange bar for the drive to work and had milk out of the carton, cos that's how I roll sometimes.
9 am Coffee and milk.
10 am Muesli and milk.
12 pm 1 chocolate caramel biscuit.
1 pm Brought my lunch today. Had mackerel in tomato sauce with tomatoes, peppers, cucumber, mixed leaves, beetroot and celery. Tasty enough and quite filling. Had four sour patch kids.
3.30 pm Hit a bit of a wall, had a coffee and milk.
5.30 pm Home from work. Made myself a slice of toast with tomato puree, cheddar cheese and some chicken on it.
6 pm Bought more chocolate fudge cake. Still disgruntled from yesterday. Had one slice with raspberries and cream. Made myself a cup of tea and milk and watched the latest episode of Only Murders in the Building (great show). Had some more milk from the carton before I left for tennis.
8 pm Played a game of mixed doubles. We won 7-6 but the victory was tainted. I spoke very sharply to William at one point, which is eating me alive. Totally different scenario to yesterday - I lost the run of myself today and was completely at fault. I apologised after and tried to explain my thinking but I feel awful. I'll be seeing him Friday again for a game of singles, so hopefully I can gain back his trust!
9 pm Rang a coach about a lesson on Saturday and found a partner for another tournament coming up when William is away, so those were some positives at the end of the day. Bought a bag of quavers from the shop and ate them on the drive home. They didn't help.
9.30 pm Came back to a sour-faced housemate. I feel like I'm on a loop, just with a different housemate every time. I actually looked up freelance work today in the office as some kind of extra income to maybe potentially earn enough money to get a mortgage and buy my own place. I'm not cut out for this anymore. Maybe I never was.
10 pm Also bought 4 bottles of Bulmers 0% in the shop on my way home. I'll have two of them before I call it a night. I also smoked 15 cigarettes today. I'm smoking too much but look, at least I'm not drinking alcohol.
Today's song needs to be something a bit depressing I think, and I can't think of a better song right now to match my mood. Thom Yorke just gets it.
Day 3
7.30 am Woke up from a nightmare where my housemate had washed a massive pile of dishes in some sort of restaurant kitchen and left them there for me to put away. Lol. Felt fresh enough even though it took me ages to get to sleep last night after the argument. I heard my housemate rustling around at 1 am in her room as well, so I guess she was also disturbed by the whole thing. Got up, jumped in the shower.
8.30 am Grabbed a nakd cocoa orange bar for the drive to work and had milk out of the carton, cos that's how I roll sometimes.
9 am Coffee and milk.
10 am Muesli and milk.
12 pm 1 chocolate caramel biscuit.
1 pm Brought my lunch today. Had mackerel in tomato sauce with tomatoes, peppers, cucumber, mixed leaves, beetroot and celery. Tasty enough and quite filling. Had four sour patch kids.
3.30 pm Hit a bit of a wall, had a coffee and milk.
5.30 pm Home from work. Made myself a slice of toast with tomato puree, cheddar cheese and some chicken on it.
6 pm Bought more chocolate fudge cake. Still disgruntled from yesterday. Had one slice with raspberries and cream. Made myself a cup of tea and milk and watched the latest episode of Only Murders in the Building (great show). Had some more milk from the carton before I left for tennis.
8 pm Played a game of mixed doubles. We won 7-6 but the victory was tainted. I spoke very sharply to William at one point, which is eating me alive. Totally different scenario to yesterday - I lost the run of myself today and was completely at fault. I apologised after and tried to explain my thinking but I feel awful. I'll be seeing him Friday again for a game of singles, so hopefully I can gain back his trust!
9 pm Rang a coach about a lesson on Saturday and found a partner for another tournament coming up when William is away, so those were some positives at the end of the day. Bought a bag of quavers from the shop and ate them on the drive home. They didn't help.
9.30 pm Came back to a sour-faced housemate. I feel like I'm on a loop, just with a different housemate every time. I actually looked up freelance work today in the office as some kind of extra income to maybe potentially earn enough money to get a mortgage and buy my own place. I'm not cut out for this anymore. Maybe I never was.
10 pm Also bought 4 bottles of Bulmers 0% in the shop on my way home. I'll have two of them before I call it a night. I also smoked 15 cigarettes today. I'm smoking too much but look, at least I'm not drinking alcohol.
Today's song needs to be something a bit depressing I think, and I can't think of a better song right now to match my mood. Thom Yorke just gets it.
