Emily Rose: The Reboot


Well-known member
Hi there,

What is my 6 month challenge I hear you ask? Basically, at the moment, I am at a complete crossroads in my life. I am free as a bird which is a fantastic thing. When life gives you this breathing space, it's a good idea to take stock and figure out what you really want. I want the following:

- Hot body
- Hot boyfriend
- Hot job

Kind of like the list they make about Regina George in Mean Girls. Anyway, I am giving myself 6 months to make all of these things happen. 6 months isn't a very long time, but it's enough to achieve all of the above. At the moment, my status is:

- Okish body. I guess it's fine. But I eat too much crap, drink too much beer, and have the belly to show for it. I also have bad circulation in my legs, which I hope a diet overhaul will help improve. I have good skin though and a nice face, so it could be worse. But I could be smoking hot! So that's the goal.

- No boyfriend and recently got my hopes up about a lovely guy but then he told me he wasn't interested which I was very sad about. Also, very few prospects to meet anyone as most of my friends are in longterm relationships and I just don't get to interact with different people enough. But I guess those are all excuses. I'm a bit more hopeful about this one than I was a year ago, so that's something.

- No job. This one is hard because I lost my last job through no fault of my own. I really want to move abroad because I think it's a good time in my life to see what else is out there and I have no ties to where I'm living right now. I applied for a job that I think would be fantastic last Friday, but I haven't heard a peep back from them yet, which is disappointing. I haven't given up on that one yet though.

Anyway, my plan to reach my goals will start with focusing on my health and fitness, which is why I'm here. My basic plan is loads of home cooking and at least 1 form of exercise every day. I'm not going to implement any rules other than that. If I meet my friend for coffee, I will allow myself to have cake if I feel like it, if I go out with friends, I will have a few drinks. I also smoke a lot, and it's very challenging to quit, but my goal with this initially is to have no more than 5 cigarettes a day and work my way down from there. I don't want to overthink it though, because too many rules and I start to panic and then end up binging on bars of chocolate or something.

Every day, I am going to ask myself the following questions:
1. How did today go?
2. How was your food and exercise?
3. Are you any closer to reaching your goals?

Anyway, I'm really excited to share my journey with you. I'll be starting tomorrow Thursday 1st December and the final day will be May 31st 2017. I really hope I will have reached all of my goals by then. Actually, I'm sure of it. Thanks for reading!
Hey lovely - welcome to the forum! You can be smokin' hot at ANY size, it's all about how you see yourself! Although if you're not happy with what you see in the mirror then you're right to want to get healthy and fit, if you look hotter at the end it's a win win!
Hey Sunflower, thanks for dropping by. I guess you're right! I don't think I look so terrible now or anything, but it's always been my dream to reach my ideal shape and that's what I'm aiming for here!

Anyway, day 1 review:

1. How did today go?
Today seemed like a very short day and a very long one. I felt like I did loads because the last few weeks have been very quiet. I had to set my alarm for the first time in weeks and it wasn't even that early but I felt really tired! I had to take a mid-afternoon nap, which I really hate doing, especially when I can't figure out why I'm feeling so drained. But I think it was a pretty good day overall.

2. How was your food and exercise?
My exercise was fantastic. After my snooze, I dragged my ass up out of bed and went to a weights class in the gym. It's one of my favourite classes and I think it has a huge impact on the body. My goal is to go to this class 3 times a week and watch that waist creep in! I also had a tennis lesson this evening, so I feel I've done some good work today.

Food was okay. I had a coffee for breakfast because I woke up too late. When I came home, I had a brunch of porridge, milk, cinnamon, chia seeds and blueberries, then a slice of toast with butter and a boiled egg. I also had another coffee. Before the gym, I had half an orange and a handful of mixed nuts. Then I completely overestimated how much time I would need to get to the gym and I ended up with half an hour to kill. I got a tea and milk in Starbucks and a slice of lemon loaf. Sigh. But I was really low on energy at that point. At least that's how I justified it to myself.

When I got home from the gym, I had a chicken stir fry with quinoa. Really yum and healthy. After tennis, I stopped at the shop and bought two snowman mousse chocolate things! Around 60g of chocolate. And I had a cup of normal tea and a peppermint tea before bed.

All in all, it wasn't too bad. The sugar cravings are a bitch though, I just always give in to myself.

3. Are you any closer to reaching your goals?
Actually, yes! I heard back from a job I applied for today, which is super exciting! Fingers crossed I get called for an interview.

In conclusion, not a bad start. On the cigarette front, smoked 10 today, going to bring that number down to 9 max tomorrow, and work my way down that way. I always want everything to be perfect straight away, but I'm not going to pressure myself this time. It's going to be good!
Well done :) Sounds like a pretty good day. Your stir fry sounds lovely - quinoa is so yummy. We have it with everything now instead of rice. Or mixed with pearl barley. Numnumnum.
Hi Emilyrose & a belated welcome to the forum:blush5: Your food sounds yummy & you sound very motivated. I always have an apple with me & when I feel like something sugary I eat my apple. It does work. It sounds like just cutting down on sweet things will move your weight in the right direction. I have chocolate once a week (Sunday night) so I don't feel I'm missing out. Cheers, Cate.
Sunflower - yeah, quinoa is fab. I love how it never makes you bloated like rice and pasta can. My favourite is red quinoa.

Thanks nyzeh, no interview yet, but fingers crossed it's on the way!

Cate, I have to start getting better at having enough snacks in the house. I just have no imagination when it comes to them. People always recommend hummous and celery, but I just end up eating the whole tub if I buy it.

Day 2:

1. How did today go?
Today went well. I had lunch with a friend who I felt like I was not getting on so well with, and I'm so happy we are back on track. I haven't been feeling great in the mornings - my sleep cycle is out of whack and I had a headache earlier that I had to take a nurofen for, which I hate doing. Maybe it's the dark days, I don't know. If I do any form of exercise at all, I feel miles better. Maybe it's mild depression because I'm not working, not sure.

2. How was your food and exercise?
Exercise was good. Went to a 15 minute abs blast at 5pm, but I was the only one doing the class, so it ended up being virtual abs for 30 minutes. It was a bit strange. I did HIIT for 30 minutes after, which was great. I have such a good gym.

Woke up quite late, but had my breakfast of half an orange, coffee, then porridge, milk, chia seeds and blueberries. That's a standard breakfast for me. I went for lunch with my friend and had a cup of parsnip and apple soup, which was delicious, a toasted ham, cheese and tomato sandwich and a side salad of couscous and potato salad. For tea, I had 2 slices of toast, one with half an avocado, the other cashew nut butter and a glass of milk. I would have cooked but I was in a hurry.

I went to a quiz with my parents and had a glass of red wine, but I was still peckish and bought a pack of cheese and onion crisps. Then they wheeled out some finger food at half time and I had about 5 cocktail sausages and a piece of breaded chicken. Came home and chilling out now with some drinks - a bottle of Blue Moon, Killanny Red, a Corona and a large cider. A bit too much alcohol but I just feel like something. No sweets today besides the alcohol but obviously beer is not contributing to the 'hot body' goal.

3. Did you smoke today?
Adding this question in, as I feel it is pertinent to my life overhaul. Have 2 cigs left in the pack, which I will smoke, bringing my count up to 11 today. I ended up smoking 12 yesterday, so I have managed to reduce by 1. Not great really, but this is going to be a real focus for the week ahead. I seriously think the cigs are why I am feeling so tired. Also, extra training means you are more dehydrated and smoking on top of that is a nightmare. I had to drink so much water today. Sigh. But anyway, breathe. It'll be grand.

4. Are you any closer to reaching your goals?

I won a 20 euro beauty voucher in the quiz tonight, so I guess that will be a step towards the hot body? Got a few invites for next Saturday so might treat myself and get my makeup done. Exciting.
Hey Emilyrose :) Have you considered making your own hummus? The bought stuff is all oil but if you make it yourself you can switch a lot of it out for water. That way it´s actually pretty hard to overdose on.
I really love how you write your entries! I understand how hard it is to quit smoking. One of my closest friends quit about 4 months back and struggled with withdrawal. He'd tell me the worst is the nagging urge to just smoke one more in the initial few weeks (also he'd complain of moodswings and headaches). But ever since he quit, he noticeably looks healthier! As they say often, the most important step towards changing anything is resolving to make a change. You've already done that, so yay! :D
LaMaria - no, I have not considered making my own hummus. I have only considered how I spelt 'hummus' incorrectly. And then I had to look up spelled vs. spelt. Clearly, I have issues.

Nyzeh - thank you! I am trying to make my entries entertaining as I am a writer by trade. You seem like a lovely person, where are you from? Thanks for taking the interest! And yes, the noticeable effects of quitting smoking are what I'm after. Goal no. 1 after all.

Day 3:

1. How did today go?
I am in misery. I feel really sore and tired. Everything hurts and I am lonely and sad.

2. How was your food and exercise?
No exercise.

Food was a Galaxy bite bar, 102g, that added 2g are really not necessary. A bottle of 7up. Coffee and milk. An apple cream cake (delicious). A 5 cheese pizza. Disaster of a food day.

3. Did you drink or smoke today?

Bottle of red wine. Naggin of whiskey so far. No stopping yet.

Cigarette count at 9 so far.

4. Are you any closer to reaching your goals?

NO! I am unbelievably angry about my love life and the disaster it has been so far. I just hate everyone. Also, I am aching all over from the gym. And I still feel like a fat fool.
Fat you may or may not be (can´t tell for certain from your diary; I´m guessing you´re objectively not properly fat), but you´re certainly not a fool! No matter how well you do on the "hot bod & hot job" front your love life can not be forced. You can only facilitate it by making sure you are exposed to new people with the right kind of (age/interests/bank account/whatever is important to you) regularly. You are quite right about the alcohol though: a lot of it is not helpful. 100 g of red wine typically has around 85 kcal, while whiskey has something like 250. Full.fat Coke has "only" 42) You can do the math for the amount you had. And due to the toxicity of alcohol your liver prioritizes its breakdown over breaking down fat.
Well done working your butt off at the gym though!
Hi LaMa - I'm about 11 and a half stone and 5 foot 8, so I am not very fat. It's more where I'm carrying it that's the problem. You're right about the alcohol. No more till next Saturday at the very least!

Day 4:

1. How did today go?
The day isn't really over, but I have no plans for the rest of the evening, so doing my entry a bit early. Today I woke up late feeling like crap. I went to the shopping centre for a bit, it was so busy. The Christmas season is well and truly here. I'm going to relax for the rest of the night, watch a few films on Netflix and the I'm a Celeb final and get an early night.

2. How was your food and exercise?
No exercise because I'm shattered. My body is still quite sore from the gym sessions on Thursday and Friday. so it's probably not a bad idea to give it a rest. I cannot wait to go for a run tomorrow though.

Food was as expected after a night on the booze. I had a bottle of Tanora and a Snickers duo bar. Then a bottle of coke. I had the worst chicken burger of all time, with garlic and cheese fries and a large Fanta. It has not gone down well, really and truly awful. I think I'm done eating for the rest of the night. Just having a peppermint tea now.

3. Did you smoke or drink today?

I have 8 cigs left in the pack, I'm going to smoke them and my plan is not to smoke until Saturday. So a 5 day break. I think it's doable because I know I can smoke again Saturday. I'm going to try it anyway.

No alcohol today, will be staying away from the stuff till Saturday when I have plans. I don't know why I binge on it so much, it's such a waste of time and it ruins my whole weekend. But these are the things I hope to overcome as the challenge progresses.

4. Are you any closer to reaching your goals?
I got a text message from a former colleague about a job going in the new company he's in. Which was really nice of him. I have my heart set on the other one but it's great to have options. So the job goal is going well.

I also got asked for ID today when I was buying Prosecco in the shop, which I was thrilled about, as I'm 30. So I must be looking fresh enough! Body goal also in progress.
Hi, Emilyrose. It seems to me that if you can cut down on your alcohol consumption, the rest might follow. It really lowers your defences, when it comes to eating healthily. Can you just have a glass or 2, when you do have a drink? Do you plan on giving up smokes altogether? That must have been nice to have been asked for ID :D
Hi Emily,

I love the ideas here in your diary. I can relate to so much of it. Way to go out and get your life for yourself! I like the idea of the 6 month goal, the home cooking and gradually tapering down the smoking.
Hi Cate - yeah, you're right. I generally do alright during the week, then the weekend rolls around and I undo all my good habits and behaviour. The Christmas season is also such a booze-fuelled time, so it's difficult.

Hi MsBubbles - thanks for stopping by. It's great to go on here and read other people on a similar journey, it also makes eating healthy foods and exercising a bit less boring!

Day 5:

1. How did today go?

Ugh, is it only day 5 already? I guess that's a good thing. Today was okay. I slept in really late, but the good news about that is that I no longer feel like a truck rolled over me. I have a really weird buzzing noise in my head at nighttime, I seem to be super stressed at the moment! And I have absolutely nothing to feel stressed about! How aggravating! Why can't I just be a relaxed, chilled out person? My brain is always running at full-speed, even when it really doesn't need to be.

2. How was your food and exercise?
I am proclaiming this week to be yoga week. I went to a class this evening, and I am as stiff and sore as a 90-year-old woman. So I'm booking in for a yoga class every day this week. I find them really, really difficult, and that is why I need to keep going. I am going to forego some of the weights classes at the gym for the week and pick them up again next week, as I think my body really needs to stretch right now. My hips feel rusty and like they need a good oiling. I'm like the Tin Man.

I also got up this morning (ok, afternoon) and did a 6k run. A personal best 6k run. That's how much my body wanted to move. I felt so good after it. If you are reading this, feeling like shit, and don't already run, then my friend, you need to start running. It is something I know I will do for the rest of my life. My dad has gone for a regular run a few times a week for years, and he is fit as a fiddle at 66.

Food was ok. I had a toasted banana sandwich, half with butter, half with cashew nut butter and a coffee after my run. Then I had a 100g bar of Ritter alpine milk. Whoops. I'm making dinner now though - rice and salmon with a salad of avocado, cucumber, celery, spinach, tomato and a little bit of red pesto. Yum. Really hungry for it now.

3. Did you smoke or drink today?
No drinkies.

Cig count up to 6 as it stands.

4. Are you any closer to reaching your goals?
That guy sent me on the spec for the potential job today. I'm not interested though. I also got roped into doing some charity work, which I am a bit annoyed about, but I guess it's good to give back when I have the time. Sigh. I just hope it's not too much time.
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I'm trying to cut out the ciggies and drinking too - I stopped for years on Champix but had a rough patch and have started having the odd one or two that I feel are sneaking up. Are you in the UK? Champix really is a wonder drug - I stopped almost overnight after being a 20 a day smoker since I was 13/14!
Hi Sunflower, yeah, I've heard about Champix. I also heard it can have some weird side effects? It's a step I would consider though.

Day 6:

1. How did today go?
I think I am a bit unwell actually. Something doesn't feel quite right. I have no energy, this really bad buzz in my head at nighttime, and it's all a bit strange.

2. How was your food and exercise?
Got up for a yoga class this morning at 9:30, the lady never showed up, so I came home and went back to bed. Annoying on all counts.

Had porridge, chia seeds, blueberries and milk and half an orange for breakfast. Beans on 2 slices of toast with butter for lunch. A coffee and cake for no reason. Then had dinner with my parents - fruit salad starter, salmon with roasted veg and sliced potatoes for main, and apple tart with cream for dessert. A coffee, a glass of white wine and a slither of lemon cake. Just now a peppermint tea.

3. Cigarette count:

4. Are you any closer to reaching your goals?
I heard back from the job I want, they probably won't start interviewing till January. I am very hopeful about it though.
The idea would be to work on the body till then. Run and yoga planned for tomorrow and a healthy eating talk in the evening, where I might pick up a few tips.
Do you normally eat a lot of sweets? Reducing sugar or caffeine suddenly can make your head feel weird.
Yeah Champix gives you weird nightmares and nausea. Only way I've ever been able to stop though - did me the world of good in exchange for a few weird, sleepless weeks!

I remember what it was like to be unemployed! That was a real tough spot in my life so I empathize with you.
What are your skills? What type of job are you looking for?
Have you considered doing something level entry (basically, something you'll get instantly) while you continue the search for bigger and better things?
That's what I did and it worked wonders for me.
I met the right people to connect me and I learned I really didn't like the field I was working in.

I also hear you about the poor circulation! Try stretching and if you can afford it, professional massages. They've also worked wonders for me. Expensive, but it's nice feeling stretched out and smooth rather than balled up an heavy in certain spots.