Marsia's Diary

Thanks LaMa! It's funny when you are getting organized and at first things are worse, but sometimes it has to get worse to get better. Greetings from the land of chaos!

Oh, tried on old bathing suits that are at least a size smaller than what I wear now, and I look pretty good in them. My arms are even skinny enough that I will probably wear them on vacation. Very happy about that!!
 
That's splendid! Feeling pretty good in a bathing suit is a great achievement.
 
I’m impressed you keep all your old clothes I throw away lots as I don’t over store stuff like that . We don’t use our attics for storing excess .
Glad your weight going so well for you . Great news
 
Thanks everyone! Trying on clothes that aren't ridiculously baggy really helped my resolve. It feels so good to look like me again, I am not going to jeopardize this by eating badly. Also the resistance training is really helping. I can do squats and things now correctly and like the feeling of the burn from strengthening my muscles, so I found a form of exercise that really gets me in shape fast and really helps me feel good.

I think this whole weight gain thing was about not taking care of myself because there is a part of me that is self-defeatist and super hard on myself and so taking care of myself is largely about not siding with that part. Actually sorting my clothes was directly going against the self defeating part because it says not to take care of my clothes, there are more important things to focus on than me and how I look. So it is really nice to get my clothes sorted. Today I look at Marie Kondo folding methods and learn to mindfully put my clothes away. I hope I can keep this up. I really like being organized and mindful!

I can wear a 2 piece swim suit now (the kind where the tops go down to almost your belly button, so will go get a nice bottom with a skirt for vacation - the 2 tops I have are good and I just need a bottom. I saw one in a store I want to go try on - I'm really excited about that! I also found my old favorite shoes in a shoe store the other day, so will go back and get a nice pair of walking shoes. I've been just wearing sneakers and beat up old shoes everywhere.

I did a sketch yesterday, and though it didn't turn out well, I liked sketching and liked what I learned from the sketch. It was of a cast iron Japanese lantern on a table by a lake with reflections in the lake from trees. I plan on just doing simple sketches to get back into the rhythm of it, and to get my skill level back.

Petal, because I have a history of hoarders (not really bad ones, but pretty bad) in the family, I don't throw useful things away very easily (Great Depression mentality in my family). So I just got rid of socks that don't really fit that are from junior high school - 40 year old socks! That is a big thing for me to be letting go of things that don't fit with who I am now. I think it's very symbolic for me to let go of physical stuff, and helps me let go of psychological stuff, too. That really surprised me!
 
I was going to quote the sentences I like especially about your post, but... I´d be quoting the whole thing. I love how well you´re looking after yourself.
 
Thanks LaMa!!! It feels good to do and not as scary as I imagined!

I tried on bathing suit bottoms and chose one that fits but isn't as flattering as I would like so that I keep at the squats and resistance exercises. I am so happy that it is a size large as my former size is two sizes up! I have until late spring to get my legs and tummy nice for the suit now, but really I could get away with wearing this now. I also bought the new pair of shoes I saw, and love wearing them. It really makes me happy! And I wore form-fitting yoga pants while shopping and felt happy. That is amazing!!

Oh, and I really like folding clothes the Marie Kondo way. She has you smooth out the piece of clothing first and thank it for it's service to you, and when I remember not to rush through this part, it is a nice practice of gratitude, on top of having a relaxing, nice looking drawer full of clothes where I can see everything and pick what I really like instead of just what I can find! Origami clothes are good, and it was easy to learn to do.

I only have to lose 2 pounds now to get to my new low. I think you are right LaMa, it is the alcohol sugars in the monk fruit sugar that were doing me in. I think I will only indulge occasionally or just use it sparingly like a little in balsamic vinaigrette and things like that.

Onward for another decluttering day and probably sketching day!
 
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I wear tankins I think they are called if and when I need too . The bottoms are flattering enough .

Glad you threw out the 40 year old socks Marisa . I sometimes use old socks for dusting .
 
Or you could have made a sock snake :) But then you already have SO many projects you don´t need more. Congratulations on feeling good in yoga pants!
 
Marsia said:
I think this whole weight gain thing was about not taking care of myself because there is a part of me that is self-defeatist and super hard on myself and so taking care of myself is largely about not siding with that part. Actually sorting my clothes was directly going against the self defeating part because it says not to take care of my clothes, there are more important things to focus on than me and how I look.
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This so resonated with me. I really need to concentrate on becoming as healthy as I can again. You are doing so well Marsia xo
 
Thanks Cate! I need to do what you are doing, and get on my elliptical every day. Meant to today, just ran out of time. I did some stomach and core resistance exercises though, and my arms and upper torso are a good sore now though. Here's to challenging old ways of not taking care of ourselves!!
 
Marsia said:
Oh, and I really like folding clothes the Marie Kondo way. She has you smooth out the piece of clothing first and thank it for it's service to you, and when I remember not to rush through this part, it is a nice practice of gratitude, on top of having a relaxing, nice looking drawer full of clothes where I can see everything and pick what I really like instead of just what I can find!
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I always thought I was organized, but it NEVER occurred to me to put clothes up on end and what a huge difference it makes!
I love the fact that every item has it's own spot, it makes putting things away easier!

Below are three newly organized drawers - As I unpack, I'm using what I've picked up from Marie Kondo for all cupboards/drawers...I LOVE it!!
:)

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Hi, Marsia. I am going to switch things around each day, but with some bike in there. Mine's not an elliptical, so not as full on.
M2M- Wow! I should show my sons this photo. They think I am really organised & have a laugh about it.
 
Hi Cate, that sounds good switching things around for me, too, because the elliptical is not as much calories as even walking up the mountain. So I think I will keep copying you! Today I may plant some bulbs and put a few things and do a little walk or stair stepper. Will check in later so I am accountable!
 
Hi LaMa, here you can either plant bulbs in the autumn (Sept., Oct., Nov.) or in the spring after the last frost which is usually at the end of Feb. or beginning of March. The stores are full of bulbs now, so I got a bunch of shade lovers. Didn't get them planted yet though because we are having company this weekend and I want to get the house not looking like a sorting disaster.

I got most of my clothes sorted, which took a long time. I am not getting in the aerobic exercise because after cleaning all day and doing resistance stuff, I am beat. Also have had a lot of patent work. I think while sorting the house I am not going to make proclamations, just keep up the exercise I am doing. I will try to gradually add in sketching and aerobic exercise but not pressure myself. I don't enjoy things when I pressure myself. But it was good to figure that out. J and I have been doing the resistance training together and it makes me so happy to do together. I think he likes teaching me what he learns, too.

It's beautiful and rainy here the last few days. I adore rain, so it's been wonderful. I am having a great time sorting books. I have amazing art books - oodles and oodles of them. Not much new. Life is busy but nice and I love how my body is feeling stronger lately!
 
Great job on all that sorting! I think you´re absolutely right to not worry about aerobic exercise while you´re so tired every evening.
Marsia said:
Hi LaMa, here you can either plant bulbs in the autumn (Sept., Oct., Nov.) or in the spring after the last frost which is usually at the end of Feb. or beginning of March.
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That´s interesting: we usually don´t get the last frost until early May and many if not most bulbs bloom before that.
 
LaMaria said:
That´s interesting: we usually don´t get the last frost until early May and many if not most bulbs bloom before that.
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That is what it was like where I grew up on the east coast, too. So this is new for me to plant in the spring instead of the autumn before. Should work ok though, they should just come up later the first year I imagine. Maybe I will hurry up and plant them just in case though!

Thanks for the confirmation about not trying to get too much exercise in. I feel a little guilty, but I want to like doing exercise, so don't want to wear myself out too hard doing it while sorting.

Time for bed for me! Good night all!
 
Marsia I think do exercise when you can and up for it else it becomes another chore and you need to keep enjoying it .

Well done on all you are achieving right now
 
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