Frühman's diary

LaMaria said:
maybe I should accept what my body dictates and focus on building more muscle instead.
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I don't know, you could find a way to convince your body ;). Can a body want to be more muscular instead of being thinner? I find it generally interesting that a certain body composition is predisposed to hunger. Maybe at that point it tries to dismantle things it doesn't like to or something else, I don't know.
 
Hansila said:
try hard and believe in a point of view, hopefully it will be achieved
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Hope doesn't seem to have anything to do with it. it is much rather a continuous adapting of the view to reality while trying to guide it to develop the habits I need. Of course you can limit your belief, you call it point of view, to a single one. This is however like a plan. And no plan survives first contact with reality.
 
Frühmann said:
I don't know, you could find a way to convince your body ;)
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Eating even more fiber, more protein, and fewer carbs could probably shift the balance at least by a few kilos. Thing is it's been years of trial and error for me to find a healthy diet my body can deal with (allergies and in the past lots of digestive issues) and which I enjoy enough to stick to it most of the time. So I'm kind of scared of changing things around too much. I'm still not sure if my body's "limit" has more to do with weight, bodyfat percentage, or total bodyfat, but trying to build more muscle while maintaining my total weight is something I haven't really tried yet so I guess it might be worth a shot.
 
LaMaria said:
Eating even more fiber, more protein, and fewer carbs could probably shift the balance at least by a few kilos. Thing is it's been years of trial and error for me to find a healthy diet my body can deal with (allergies and in the past lots of digestive issues) and which I enjoy enough to stick to it most of the time.
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Makes sense. At some point I imagine I'll also adapt what I want to be to how I am, so I won't worry forever as long as I'm not in danger of becoming overweight. I mean, there is so much more to out there than food. Some people don't even worry about food their entire life :blush5:
 
Another good day, food wise. Haven't had much hunger, yay.

Day 34:
  • Breakfast:
    • shake 500 kcal
  • Lunch:
    • wrap 800 kcal
    • meat 300 kcal
  • Dinner:
    • -
Total: 1600 kcal
 
A good day, food-wise. This week was a no-sports week to see how no sport influences what I lose. Fat% rose a bit but I do not know whether it is a trend or rather my scale. Now a week with some activity to see how things develop. Interesting thing is that I can lose weight just by eating less, though I may lose more muscle in the process that is then further slowing down weight loss. It is however possible.

I think I lost too much to attribute all to fat anyway so it makes sense that I also lost muscle and other parts more. A part of my weight loss can also be explained with not drinking enough water yesterday night, so I'm not interpreting too much into it for now. I seem to feel a little more hunger than usual in the morning, which might be explained by the too-fast weight loss. 1800 kcal might be enough to remove 1kg per week.

Day 35:
  • Breakfast:
    • shake 500 kcal
  • Lunch:
    • wrap 800 kcal
    • meat 300 kcal
  • Dinner:
    • -
Total: 1600 kcal
Weight: 125.3 kg
Fat: 38.1%
Muscle: 28.3%
BMI: 32.1
Visceral fat: 13
 
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A usual day, food-wise. A couple of days ago I wrote down that I want neither be defined nor constrained by food. The point here is that I do not want this to be part of my identity. I want it to be like lifting a finger later, effortless to do and not having to think much about it. For this I'm trying to learn habits and writing down thoughts so its later not much to think about.

For now I see counting calories and watching the scale as easy methods to control and track weight. Because always tracking calories is too much work its probably to track my weight over some time and see whether I gained weight substantially. When I go over a certain threshold I should start doing diet a to get below it, which should include what I am currently doing - eating below maintenance. It feels hard sometimes but it is doable, especially with he possibility of just eating less instead of having to invest in sports. When I do that weight control action early, I shouldn't have to do it over a long time like I currently will have to do.

The current beliefs of no reward & punishment with food and good/bad food stay on. However, I will give myself more freedom once I'll be on maintenance to feel more free again. All that while not fearing gaining weight. Will see how good that will do :D. Maybe it is just a dream of mine.

Day 36:
  • Breakfast:
    • shake 500 kcal
  • Lunch:
    • wrap 800 kcal
    • meat 300 kcal
  • Dinner:
    • -
Total: 1600 kcal
 
A little more than usual. Otherwise a good day, food-wise.

About balance I do not know an alternative without having food control my life a little. :D

Day 37:
  • Breakfast:
    • shake 500 kcal
  • Lunch:
    • wrap 800 kcal
    • meat 300 kcal
  • Dinner:
    • salad 160 kcal
Total: 1760 kcal
 
Another good day, food-wise.

A thought I had a couple days before is that I do not want to justify myself, even when I go over my limit. Everybody sees where I stand, and thats enough. No need to explain as long as I had my reasons and I can justify it to myself :). Maybe it is not good for starters but I think it is required to get independent once on maintenance.

Day 38:
  • Breakfast:
    • shake 500 kcal
  • Lunch:
    • wrap 800 kcal
    • meat 300 kcal
  • Dinner:
    • -
Total: 1600 kcal
 
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Frühmann said:
No need to explain as long as I had my reasons and I can justify it to myself
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In the end it´s all between you and your scale. I do comment when I see people go extremely low on calories because I want everyone to be as healthy as possible but otherwise I just try to be supportive.
 
LaMaria said:
In the end it´s all between you and your scale. I do comment when I see people go extremely low on calories because I want everyone to be as healthy as possible but otherwise I just try to be supportive.
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Agreed. I really like you commenting, please don't stop because I wrote that :D. For me is more about my dislike of justifying what my body requires right now. It is not something I can necessarily change, which is why I feel like its not something I have to defend while below maintenance. The motto is to better eat what I require compared to not eating it and staying on my current diet.
 
Here's my weekly update. I pretty much followed the same diet the rest of the week, except for a single cookie. I seem to be tired sometimes over the day, which may suggests that I'm not eating enough but that could also result from the heat in my appartment, currently 27°C.

Sadly, I did not lose more weight over the week and I'm not sure why. I did not make as much sports, but I should still lose weight on a 1600 kcal diet. I think I'll experiment more with other food and more shakes to see whether what calories I eat have a bigger influence than expected, compared to how many. Not certain yet whether I'll mix it with more sports or rather wait to see the influence of different food. Also the foods' kcals could be labeled as lower than reality.

Another thought is to try out maintenance and cutting weeks. The goal would be to see how that influences weight loss. As a side note, I was at 125 for 2 years before I gained weight the last 6 months, maybe its also about my body not wanting to go below the weight I held for a long time.

Total: 1600 kcal
Weight: 125.3 kg
Fat: 37.8%
Muscle: 28.4%
BMI: 32.1
Visceral fat: 13
 
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It is frustrating when you are doing the right thing, but the weight doesn't come off. Sometimes it means a bigger drop the next week & it may just be fluid retention in the heat. Are you sleeping well?
 
Cate said:
It is frustrating when you are doing the right thing, but the weight doesn't come off. Sometimes it means a bigger drop the next week & it may just be fluid retention in the heat. Are you sleeping well?
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Definitely frustrating :) Currently doin 6.5-7.5h, though having dark circles around my eyes for a couple of years already, gonna check that out some time. Shouldn't influence my short-term weight loss though.

My plan for now is to see how a change from diet mixes things up, though the fluid thing might really be the answer. However I cannot wait :D
 
Two days in a row now I've got night sweat and feel dizzy when standing up to the point, where I have to do things slow in the beginning to not fall over. Blood pressure at that time yesterday yesterday 103:77 and today 108:78, which climbed later to 125:82-129:82 and 132:82 before bed. I've got a measurement from an evening in march and there I was at 135:79, which seems similar to my current reading, except that I've no comparison measurement for the morning.

Blood sugar was 98, which corresponds to fasting. This was expected. Both can explain the morning dizziness. It might also be explained with me catching a cold from sitting behind a ventilator with a sweaty back. Funny thing is that the start of the dizziness corresponds to me drinking more shakes, 3x per day.

For now I'm eating more salt because I thought I might not have had enough of that. Gonna try one of those Keto urine tests to see whether my acid levels are too hight. Also treated myself to a little pizza yesterday with alot of salt, but still only got to 1500. I really don't want to eat more because I want to lose more weight, I however might try that to lose the dizziness and the night sweat, which is annoying.
 
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