Ain't nothin gonna break my stride

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Julie3

Julie3

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Hi everyone!

I am finally creating a diary after being on here off and on for years. Happy to be here! ?

A couple weeks ago (June 29th), I decided I needed to start trying to lose this weight again. For awhile I just completely didn’t care and ate whatever I wanted and my exercise consisted of… nothing. I feel like I go through long periods of this, which is a huge reason I am still overweight. I am really hoping this diary will help keep me on track! Plus I don’t really like talking about weight loss in my actual life because none of my friends are overweight/ I don’t feel comfortable talking about it because it is so closely linked to my insecurities.

So, over the past 12 days I lost 5 lbs :). I must say it feels much longer though haha. I am not writing my food down, but am closely keeping track and keeping a running total in my head – aiming for 1,200 /day. So far I have been able to stick to it! I am very happy about this because a huge issue in the past was totally falling off the wagon on weekends and taking 2 steps back. In the past it has taken me many months to make inroads into this problem, so I know it’s early but I am very happy that this time it just seems easier.

So! My plan so far is 1,200 calories a day and trying to add in more vegetables and eat less carbs (read pasta & bread). So far, I’ve been eating a lot of peas. This week’s goal - eating some broccoli.

Exercise plan: 45 min of cardio 5x a week. As my body gets more used to this I will add in more exercises/strength training, probably in august.

Hunger distraction strategy: listening to happy music/ coming here ;)

Look forward to reading other peoples diaries!

Ttyl,

Julie
 
Hi Julie & welcome back to the forum & to 5lbs lost first week.
" Plus I don’t really like talking about weight loss in my actual life because none of my friends are overweight/ I don’t feel comfortable talking about it because it is so closely linked to my insecurities. "
That's why I joined the forum 8 years ago. I thought I would bore everyone stupid.....so came in here, made lots of new friends & bored them stupid instead. We have so much in common with one another and can say what we want, without risk of criticism. It's a very supportive community. Making gradual changes & building up as you gain confidence & lose weight is a good way to go. All the best, xo Cate
 
Hunger distractions: duct tape and rope to keep me out of the kitchen and food from entering my mouth. *solidadvice* ;) Welcome to actually having a diary lurker, lol!
 
Hi everyone!

Cate - thank you Cate! It is nice to hear from someone who is farther along on their journey. And I am sure you aren't boring anyone :)

Kaplooie- hahaha yea that would be more effective. Gotta look into that!


Well the past few days have not been that good. I haven't eaten huge amounts, but definitely too much. It's so bizarre how I can not be hungry AT ALL, sometimes even full, but I still have this huge urge to eat. How is that possible?? I have one friend (who is thin) and she said that when she is full, she has no desire to eat and is repulsed by food. That's what I need. Plus I have been freaking myself out by reading about fat cells (once you gain them you can never lose them apparently).

I knew this week would be hard because it is super busy at work and I have things after work every day this week so I don't have time to exercise. And whenever I don't exercise it is so much harder for me to stay on track food wise.

It is just hard because I feel so far away from my goal, ahhhhh.
 
Today wasn't good in that I ate a bunch of stuff even though I wasn't hungry. I did go to the gym though. I am glad I made it - I reallyyy didn't want to go but felt better afterwards. I am thinking about starting to work out in the mornings if I can make myself get up.
 
I'm in the same boat, need to wake up early and go to the gym so I start my day right instead of procrastinating it all day until it doesn't happen.
 
Sounds like a good plan, if you can do it. I know that if I started my day exercising, I would be much more energetic & positive for the rest of the day, but I am SO not a morning person. Kudos to you both if you can! Cheers, Cate
 
Hi,

Ahh a month went by so quickly. I lost a lot of momentum and I have been eating a lot even when I am not hungry, which is a huge problem for me. I know I am not an emotional eater (because I eat for every emotion ;) ), but I think I am a comfort eater. Also I do tend to sabatoge myself every time I make progress, I don't know if it is my brain chemicals rebelling because of weight loss or more of an emotional problem.

Either way, I went to the gym yesterday and I weighed myself even though I was scared I had gained a bunch of weight... and I had lost 4 pounds! Granted that is not great for 5 weeks but I will take it, I was so scared I had gained 10 lbs.

So, I think for now I am back on track. My next goal is to lose 9 lbs in the next month. I think I can do it. I really need to just get this weight loss done so I can get on my life. Right now it is shaping everything about me because I feel so constrained by it.
 
Hi Julie, now that is what I call a win/win situation or a "get out of jail free" card. Self-sabotage is weird. I needed help when I lost all my excess weight, back in 2007. I thought I would have a much better self image, but I didn't & had counselling. It really helped & I'm glad that I did.
It's good to see you back on track. Go you! xoC
 
Well, 10 months went by. On Monday,I weighed in for the first time in nearly a year and saw I was back up to my highest weight (which I hit for the first time in college). Sooo, starting again. I forgot what a mental game this is, 4 days in and already sick of dieting. Right now I'm just ting to stop myself from going into the kitchen.
 
Welcome back Julie. We all know the struggle and I´m pretty sure we´ve all tried and failed before now BUT there really is no other way. It may be helpful to reframe your thoughts a bit. "Dieting" sounds like depriving yourself of what´s rightfully yours. Maybe it could be helpful to remind yourself of the positives? Giving your body the nutrients it needs without weighing it down. Discovering new and better foods. Finding new and healthier ways to comfort yourself. Something like that? Your brain believes whatever it´s told often enough.
 
Hi Julie, & welcome back to the forum. What sort of plan do you have to lose weight & get healthy? You need something that you can maintain over a long period of time. It should not feel like a negative thing. I typed this in your diary this morning but had to leave in a hurry. LaMa has said what I wanted to say, which is good :D We sure have all tried & failed. I don't know any perfect people honey, xo
 
Thank you for your comments cate and lamaria! I'm glad to be back, thanks for the support.

Yes I definitely think it would help if I can think about this as a long term change rather than short term deprivation. I also do need to come up with a more formal plan. I think I'm going to try writing my food down as I haven't before.

Also I need to get better at managing stress because work has been very stressful, and people have been getting laid off. I don't think I'm in danger of this but it does weigh on my mind.

Today: (1100-1200)
Cup of broccoli and sauce
2 soy nuggets
Piece of bread with cheeze

Cup of apple juice
Some mac and cheeze

Subway footlong (bread, lettuce, cucumber, olives, pickles)

Exercise: walked a couple miles
 
Work stress does make things harder, but on the other hand it makes it more important to eat decently as in the long term a well-fed body is more resilient.
 
Hi,

One week mark! I'm not going to weigh in til Tuesday though because I've set my goals on a month basis. I think I'm on target though! Can't believe summer is already here.

Today I ate (1200):

Some mac and cheeze
A cup of broccoli and tomato sauce
Some fritos
Piece of bread with cheeze and tofurkey
Apple juice

Small piece of cookie
Tofu/bean sandwich

Tofu hotdog w roll

Exercise : walked a couple miles
 
Hi,

Monday Tuesday Wednesday were all okay, averaged about 1350 calories with no binges. I exercised for an hour yesterday and today so I'm glad about that. My next goal is getting under 170, aiming for next Friday! But I don't have room to screw any day up.

I I think I need to better about packing food for lunch, I got really hungry today and almost really went to town on some bagels but luckily I stopped after 1.5. Still not my finest moment.

Tomorrow I have a 5k race but I might walk some of with my friend, aiming for 40 min.

So true LaMa about stress, trying to manage it.

June is going to be great I can feel it!

As a side note it's so weird to me how often when I suddenly decide to start losing weight again, I'm always at the same weight (177). Then I battttllle to 140 were I ricochet back up. Hopefully not this time!
 
This time it will be different Julie. You can do it. Look on it as a learning experience. Here's to a good week for all of us. Cheers, but with herbal tea, :cheers2: Cate
 
:) I´ll toast you with water this morning. Stick with your diary, even when you reach your goal, and you can absolutely keep your weight!
 
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