Ain't nothin gonna break my stride

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Thank you Cate, Butterfly, and Hana! I'm so looking forward to getting out of the 160s.

And thanks Hana, been vegan since I was 20 :)

Been busy the last few days, but ate around 1200 each day.

Today:
Food
Cereal w/ almond milk
Banana

Peas
4 pieces of "fish"

Bowl of broccoli and sauce, cheeze
3 slices of bread with lettuce, earth balance, and tofurkey
Some vegan cheese puffs

Exercise: 55 min on elliptical (453 cal in 45), stretches, 50 crunches, 18 lat pull downs 65 lbs

Work was stressful today, everything was needed yesterday. I need to make sure I don't let it get to me.
 
It's very hard not eating the wrong thing when you're tired and/or stressed. I'm glad this week is almost over. Take care xo Cate
 
Thank you Miss Fit and Cate, trying to manage the stress. Feel kind of sick to my stomach after a long day. Didn't overeat though, I barely had a minute.

Have been on track with food, giving myself off today from exercising.
 
Another long day, didn't have time to go the gym, but food was on track (1200ish). Think I will try going to the gym before work for the rest of this week. So tireddd.

I have to say though I am proud of myself for not binging or getting off track food wise at all so far knock on wood. I think a big part of that is this forum and the support here, for the first time I don't feel like I'm doing this alone. So thank youuu :)
 
Thank you LaMa!

Went to the gym yesterday and today in the morning. It kind of screwed me up a little because I was hungrier and eating earlier in the day. Ate about 1500 both days which are the highest to date. It was stressing me out earlier but I just have to remember that is still good.

Food:
Yesterday

2 slices of bread with earth balance, 1/2 lb tofu scramble

1 large bagel with tofu cream cheese (this killed me calorically, the bagel alone was 500 cal +)

1/2 lb tofu scramble with broccoli and tomato sauce ( this tasted so good, gotta do it again soon)

Snickerdoodle vegan cashew ice cream

Today:
1 large bowl of cereal with almond milk

2 large bowls of brown rice, beans,guacomole, tofu, kale, lettuce

A couple candies and a few vegan cheese puffs

Exercise: 47 min on elliptical (yesterday got 455 cals burned in 45 min :) )

Weighed in today at 162.5 lbs/ 73.7 kgs.

Work was stressful, but tomorrow should be fine.

Yesterday I tried on some of my old skinnier clothes. Not sure how I feel, it was a little depressing I still have a ways to go before I fit again, but it was a nice reminder that I have achieved weight loss before.

Also, I know I have lost weight because my current pants are loose but I can't see it in the mirror.

I feel a little stressed I'm not achieving enough in my life, but I'm not sure if I have enough mental real estate to take anything else on right now, losing weight requires a lot of mental energy.
 
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Feeling like you're not achieving enough is, sadly, very normal. It's not enough to be a useful part of society and to make the world a bit nicer through our presence - no, we have to get ahead. Whatever that means. To my mind that's where midlife crises stem from: the realization that you're a normal human being who will never be a superheroin/Mr Universe/the next big idol/rich and famous (in your field). Which is a bit of a derail from your post but it's what I'm seeing around me at the moment. Even though we need many more nurses, cooks and accountants than hotshot brain surgeons.
 
I agree with LaMa. There is too much pressure on people to be superhuman. We are not. "Making the world a bit nicer through our presence" is a lovely ideal. Why are we doing this to ourselves? I would rather be kind than rich or powerful. Kindness is much more important that "success"- whatever that means. Be kind to yourself Julie. :grouphug: Cate
 
Binging sucks. But mainly it sucks because it´s a sign we´re anxious/exhausted/horrible and don´t know how to deal with that. It doesn´t mean YOU suck! So be nice to yourself.
 
Hi guys,

I am completely off the rails. I have no idea how many calories I have been eating but I think I ate 3500+ yesterday. I feel absolutely horrible about myself right now. I can actually feel a bunch of additional fat all over my body. I feel sick.
Thanks LaMa and Cate :(
 
Let's say you ate 4000 kcal yesterday... 2000 more than an average healthy female needs for maintenance. Or about half a pound of real weight gain. That sucks! But it's no disaster. It can be fixed. So what's getting you down, hon? Which part of the ole jerkbrain is making you think being slim and fit isn't worth the effort right now?
 
Hi LaMa thank you very much for your response. :grouphug: It helped me get to the gym after work. I feel a little better now.

I've tried to figure out why these lapses happen, I think this time it started because I ate about 1200 calories for Sunday's lunch (fried food triggered it I think, plus not paying attention-I was out to lunch at a dim sum place and there was all this loud offering of food, and dishes being passed around at a frantic pace).

After that I got home and was depressed about my failure and ate a big dinner despite feeling stuffed. However, Monday was the day that killed me, I kept eating and couldn't seem to make myself stop despite feeling painfully full. Everything I ate just made me more upset so I ate again. And again and again.

Ate today I think about 1200 although I wasn't hungry at all, still feel horribly full. Didn't really get emotions under control til now, after I worked out.

I think I will try to not eat tomorrow unless I'm actually hungry which I don't see happening.

Weighed in up 2 lbs, as you said LaMa it sucks but I can overcome it. Would still like to get out of the 160s by August I think I can do it.
 
I know I always get terribly cravy when I eat sushi. I don´t know why but by now I will only get it when I know I won´t physically be able to eat anything later. I guess that´s just part of getting to know your body.
 
Hi Julie,

It's amazing how exercise helps the emotions isn't it. Takes me time to get to exercise but I always feel better for it.

Don't beat yourself up. For better or worse there is nothing perfect in this world and that can mean our learning curve isn't always the smooth sailing experience we would like it to be. I think you are doing really well for talking out your hurdles here. It obviously means you're still moving forward even if it doesn't always feel like it. :)
 
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