My Big Fat Journal

Pineola, first, I have to say, when I read how much exercise you did, I was blown away. It looks like a lot to me. (shows how much I do huh). I hate photos of myself, had a work one yesterday which will be in the local paper :mad: . But I figure thats how everyone sees me anyway, so I try not to stress. We never look as awful to everyone else as we think we look. I was thinking, I dont know about you, but when I read peoples posts on here, I dont even think of any of them as being overweight (the people I mean, not the posts ha ha). I like it, because it shows how important it is to not judge people by their cover, which unfortunatlely so many do. Anyway on the matter of veggies, I try to have some with every meal. Not neccessarily heaps, just some. Have a great day:)
 
Hey Pineola! Hope your pictures went alright.

L-Jay... I know EXACTLY what you're talking about!! I don't think of the people on here being overweight at all!
 
Dear Diary,

Just a quick note before I go to work. I am so upset right now. I worked so hard this week and lost zip, zero, nada.........@#%^*(&%$@!

I don't get it. I'm going to go to work and kick Donna. I'm sure it's all her fault!

P.S. The picture lady had no sense of humor.
 
I'll never understand people with no sense of humour! Life is too short to be so uptight!

And about your weight...I posted this in the FSD too, you might have put on some muscle mass which is GREAT!!! The more muscle you gain, the less body fat you have which means the healthier you are! I'd definately recommend measuring yourself to see if you've lost inches, if you don't already :)

Goodluck!
 
Bad photo lady!

Pineola said:
so I told her I was really ugly and I needed someone who knew how to light me!
Click to expand...

You are funny. I hate when you try to be funny with someone and they just don't get it or stare at you, but the older I get the goofier I get and the less I care what others think (boy, I can't wait to be an embarassment to my daughters one day!). How does she get people to smile for the camera if she doesn't lighten up?

Oh well.

Re the veggies. Sometimes I wander the fruit and veggie aisle and nothing appeals to me. You are right, you have to dig out the recipes for good ideas. Last trip to the store I made myself buy lots of veggies:

broccoli (steamed, with a little garlic and butter, sorry have to have a little butter),
cucumbers and tomatoes and red onion (chop and toss with vinegar, oregano, pepper, optional salt - makes a greek salad wth no lettuce - very yummy, some people put in a little olive oil or feta, but I like it as is)
asparagus (break or chop off last couple of tough inches, drizzle with < 1T olive oil and fresh ground pepper, put in 450 oven until it starts to sizzle 7-9 minutes, pull out and drizzle lemon juice and optional salt
romaine lettuce (my favorite salad is with balsamic vinaigrette lots of bang for your calories, low fat feta cheese, tomatoes - easy yummy, some add toasted walnuts or pecans)
baby carrots (at 2-3 calories each, I eat them plain while I'm cooking or when I start rummaging through the fridge for a snack, lots of chewing required, slows me down)

Well those are my easiest (and therefore most likely for me to eat them) veggie choices.

Sucks the scale didn't move, but you know Kino is right, it could be muscle gain, which is awesome. But you also know there's a few pounds variance for water retention and whether you are feeling "regular" (sorry if that sounds yucky). I know you will keep it up and see the scale move down again soon.
 
I'm sorry about no weight loss. At leat you didn't gain! Hopefully it's just water weight and you can lose it. You probably just gained some muscle.
Too bad the picture lady had NO sense of humor! Hope you have a great weekend!
 
You are all so great. Thanks for those veggie ideas, Patty. I appreciate it. I was going to go to the grocery tonight, but I remembered that the Farmer's Market is tomorrow so I am going to go there to get my veggies. I'm sure I will find more flavorable (ok that is a made up word) things there.

L-Jay you are right on! It's funny how most people here have their weight at the bottom of all their posts or at least some indication of how much weight they need to lose, but you don't even think about it. It is a very cool community here and I am so glad I joined.

Manaloa/Kino--I didn't hide behind anyone and I didn't wear the suit that was too big. I wore some lovely Ralph Lauren pants and a groovy silk blouse. I smiled really big and I said to myself...self...just think, next year you will look at this picture and say “man was I fat!”

My calories today were a tad high at 1740, which would not be so bad, but I didn't exercise except for a very short walk. I waited too long and now it is raining. I had kind of a weird emotional day with food today. I haven't had a day like that for weeks. I started out weighing in and not losing any weight from last week. Thank goodness I didn't gain.... I would have been a big, fat downer to go back into the 60's. Then I get to work and one guy brings in the biggest box of doughnuts. All cream filled from my favorite place in town. Someone else brings in some bacony, cheesy, egg pie kind of thing that looked really good. It was killing me. At one point I cut a doughnut in half and took a bite. The minute I could taste it something in me just snapped and I said no way is this worth all these calories. I spit it in the garbage can in the kitchen. Later I went to lunch and got a salad from Arby's. It just didn't do it for me. I was craving a Snickers for some reason. I have no idea why. I sat and thought about what I could have that would be sweet and stop this massive feeling of deprivation I was feeling. I remembered reading in someone's diary...Beps's I think that McDonald’s ice cream cone is only 150 calories so I went and got one. I felt much better after that and then I was kind of freaked out by how much food can manipulate my mood. It sucks!

So then…. I come on line earlier and there was a thread started that freaked me out too! Here is the link to it if anyone hasn’t seen it but they want a big kick in the ass to get motivated again.

http://weight-loss.fitness.com/showthread.php?t=5089

I then had a conversation with my niece who is an RN at huge hospital in GA. She sees everything. I had sent her a link to a video that you will find if you go to that thread. It is a video of this really, really obese man that can’t get out of bed. Now…I have to preface this by telling you that my niece is a very sweet, caring person. She is not thin and completely understands the struggle of being overweight and how hard it is to buckle down and lose weight. She looked at the guy and said “They might as well just shoot him”---I got upset and said he can go on a diet and lose weight. She said he has already done so much damage to his body it won’t make any difference. Now I am thinking about my arteries etc…all night. Iye iye iye! What the heck is wrong with me today?

Crap this day is has been weird.
 
Hey, Hf and Dari! You must have been typing while I was writing my manifesto above. Thanks for stopping by. Yeah, that pic chick was a real stone-faced honey.

Thanks for stopping by. Have a great weekend.
 
Sorry that yesterday was so werird for you! It may not have been that your mood was being altered by food but that your body was needing something that you weren't providing. Maybe that's why you went crazy around the food in your office. Hope you have a great day today and a great weekend!
 
Dear Diary,

Went to the Farmer's Market this morning. I got lots of lovely vegetables and now I have no excuse not to eat them all. I have already cooked up a summer squash/zucchini number. I stir fried it in a bit of garlic and Serrano peppers. I have it in the fridge for side dishes or what ever I need it for. I got some cabbage that I will shred part of and the other use the leaves for wraps. I bought some organic ground chicken I was thinking of cooking up some nutty brown rice number and cooking up the chicken w/some spices to make wraps out of the cabbage. I also got some cheddar, onion wheat pitas that the Hippie Ladies made. They make the best breads, granola bars and cookies. I had one of the granola bars for breakfast. It was 480 calories, but so yummy. I also bought some soy beans. I had never bought them fresh like that before. I tell you, that Mindful eating thing I was talking about works really well with those things. First off, you just buy a big bush of them. I was carrying around a big bouquet of the soy bush. Then you have to take them off the bush. After that I had to boil them for 3 mins. Then I had to rinse, drain and remove the beans from the pod. I think I got about a cup of beans for all my trouble, but it was only $1.00. I also got some really good tomatoes and fresh garlic and some lovely Glads for my dining room.

Speaking of mindful eating.....I think I may be too cynical for it. I tried it a couple times this week. It's great when you are eating something really healthy--imagining it growing and thinking about how pretty it is while you are cooking it etc...but when you are eating a lot of things, you don't really want to think about where they came from. I was eating some beef the other day and started thinking about the slaughter house and all that stuff....yuck. I am a hypocrite of course. I love a good steak, I just like to live in denial about where it came from. Then when I was washing off some fruit I started thinking about the person who picked it and how they could have gone to the bathroom and not washed their hands.....ha ha...did I ever mention I was a germ freak?

Anyway...feeling better today. I cheated this morning and weighed myself again. I think I may get kicked out of the FSD for that, but I lost 1 little pound for some reason yesterday so I don't feel like all I am trying to do is for not.

Hope ya'll are having a good day.
 
Last edited:
All that food sounds so good! Can you come cook for me? I think the hardest part about cooking is figuring out what to have! Once I start cooking I don't mind so much...but coming up with something is always my challenge! You are doing so well and another pound lost....WOOOOHOOO lets shake a little booty tonite!!!
 
Dear Diary,

I walked and walked and walked yesterday so I am hoping to keep it up. I took my dog to the Farmer's Market and then we walked all over the downtown area. I feel so much better when I get a good walk in. I have to confess I weighed myself again today. I was down a few oz. I don't want to become a slave to the scale, but i irked me so bad that I didn't lose between weigh ins last time. I feel like I need to watch that number. The problem is it is fine when it goes down each time, but if it ever goes up I will be bummed and being a woman, I know there are many circumstances that could make it go up from time to time.

Today I'm cleaning the house, so I hope to get some more dance time in. My ticker isn't moving as much as I would like and I only have about 10 days left. I better get going on shaking my booty, Spell!
 
Hi Pineola! I checked out some of that video. Its sad to think how much of a hole humans can dig themselves into. Certainly makes me appreciate what I have. I need to work on not taking my health and my ability to improve it even more, for granted. I was very impressed to read about you spitting that doughnut out. I've done things like that in the past, so I know its possible again.
 
Then when I was washing off some fruit I started thinking about the person who picked it and how they could have gone to the bathroom and not washed their hands.....ha ha...did I ever mention I was a germ freak?
Click to expand...

I'm with you on this one!!!!!! That's why I've been having trouble eating out lately...which is a good thing really. But I think about how dirty the kitchens are and the people....and yuk!!! I just really don't enjoy the meal.

The only place I feel comfortable eating out anymore is this burrito bar place and they make it right in front of you and they are all wearing plastic gloves. And the person handling the money at the checkout does not help make the food until they put gloves on.

All your fresh veggies sound wonderful!!! I know you will enjoy them this week. And the scale will move, don't fret honey bunny!!!!

Have a great rest of your weekend.
 
I totally hear you on the eating thing! I have had a rough couple of days too! Read my diary entry... Cravings, snacking, moods yuck... this will be my first TOM without allowing myself some major chocolate binges! yikes! I am a little worried about that...
I have gone back to read some of your postings in your diary and I really appreicated the honesty that you allow yourself to have...
I read the post about your 420 activity...well a little thing that I used to have when i was doing the Jenny Craig thing was Grape Hubba Bubba bubble gum... it was enough to satisfy those crazy 420 cravings...
I don't participate in 420 as much as I once did but may need to cross that bridge one day again.
I too have quit smoking. I quit about 9 months ago but it feels like yesterday that I quit when I crave food, because then I crave a smoke...I used to substitute one for the other... i think that's another reason why I gained so much weight this past year. Quitting smoking often correlates with gaining weight.
Thanks for your honesty and for joining the biggest loser group with us!
good luck buddy!:D
~P
 
Hey Piney!
It sounds like you had a great walk and the vegies in your house sound WONDERFUL! I can do fruit. I love fruit...but when it comes to vegies, unless I hide them all in a salad, you can just about forget it ;)

As for the germ bit...I think your's and Scarlett's post need to come with a warning label! I seriously don't think about those things, or care much - I'm a firm believer in that which doesn't kill us, makes us stronger - germs included ;)

So now I have these unwanted visions running around my brain!! GAK!
 
Hehe good thing you arnt like me,. i buy veges and then end up forgetting to cook them till they are gone off. I get so darned busy that i just dont have the time to prep and cook!
 
You're doing a great job walking! I wish that we had a farmers market around here so that I could buy some fresh vegetables... :(
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top