Cate's Diary

Thanks LaMa. You're right. We should surround ourselves with the people you like & those who are good for you. I don't need any negativity in my life. I can always do with hugs, thank you xo
Hi Vee. No need for apologies. You're right about not developing a thick skin. I know I'm sensitive, but I really do not need to associate with negative people, & neither do you. Thanks for your support. Whether you type in my diary or not, I know that you're always in the background & I think you know that I'm the same
I have had a really good day today. We went to town & got all the things on our list done & more. All good! I'm feeling much better. I'm playing golf with my husband tomorrow & that should be fun. It should be a pleasant & sociable day. I have had about 5 messages from different women golfers, asking if I'm OK, which is nice.
 
I'm a teary angry person as well--Poor Cate <3 Tell that bitch where to go! Negativity will only bring you down xo

Glad today was better xoxox
 
Sunflower said:
I'm a teary angry person as well--Poor Cate <3 Tell that bitch where to go! Negativity will only bring you down xo
Glad today was better xoxox
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Thanks Han. I said hello to her yesterday & then quickly moved on. I'll steer well clear from now on xo

LaMaria said:
Best proof that this "lady" is getting on other people´s nerves too and that your reaction was the right one.
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True LaMa. I'm still glad I got out of there, without really saying what I thought. I won't have to have much to do with her anyway. I had not seen this side of her character & now understand how she has got people offside. I have felt strengthened by the messages.

Our older son, D-came up to see us last night, unexpectedly, to tell us that he & his GF, T have split up. She can't see herself being happy with him on a permanent basis, mainly because of his situation i.e. being a father of 3 kids. How sad. She loves him, he loves her, but she has ambition(not a problem) & wants to travel(he wouldn't go away for more than 2 weeks) so it has ended. He said he has shed many tears & feels all cried out. Apparently the kids always talk about their mother & she finds it too hard not to make disparaging comments, knowing how difficult our son's marriage was & how mentally unstable their mother is. I have always felt that she had a good relationship with the kids, but it has always been quite a distant one. D says she gets on much better with other people's kids than with his.

All in all it's very sad for him. He is going to tell the kids next week-end. (edit- but not that they are the main reason!) He was trying to wait until after Christmas, but it's too hard keeping up the pretense. He kept it from us for weeks. He has not told his brother yet. Hopefully he will do that today.

I would like to think that things will work out for him. 2014 will not go down as the best year for our family. 2015, hopefully, will be much better for our 2 sons. As a parent you want your "children" to be happy & have the love that we have for each other. I can only hope!
Much love to all, xoxo Cate
 
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Really sorry to hear that... I think break-ups without a "guilty" party are harder short term because there is no clear goal to direct your frustration against, but maybe in the long run they leave you ready to love again sooner because anger and scapegoating are harmful to your capacity for trusting people. If that makes sense. More hugs making their way to the other side of the world.
 
Boy that's tough Cate. I hope he can find someone that is good for his family. It sounds like his cruddy ex is still giving his relationships trouble. Hopefully the kids deal with it okay.
 
Sorry to hear about the break up, Cate. I'd love to give some sage wisdom or advice on that topic, but as you know I'm just about as clueless as it gets when it comes to this stuff, so I'll just wish your son well and hopefully he'll find someone new soon enough.
 
Thanks LaMa, Q & V for your ongoing support! I got this message last night from him-
"Love you too Mum. Don't be too sad/upset. I'll be ok in time. I'm a strong person and I've got beautiful people around me. I know I've done everything I could have. So has T. It's just the way it is & part of me has known that we wouldn't be forever. We're just both lucky we've had what we had & it was real. Love you, Dad, R & the kids more than anything in the world & I know that's forever."
What can I say? That made me teary, but not really sad, if you know what I mean. He is strong & does have an excellent network of caring & lovely friends & a family that has lots & lots of love. I hope both our sons find the right person to love & that it lasts forever. They are still only young. I will always hope.
Love to you all, xoxo Cate.
PS I'm having an active at-home day today- car washing, house-cleaning, a bit of gardening....perfect.
PPS. R(our younger son) went bush-walking yesterday & had a great day & is sounding very positive. D rang him last night & told him of the break-up. Apparently they had a good chat.
 
Aww.. sorry to hear about your son's breakup, Cate. He sounds like a sweet guy though. I wish him all the best. :)

Good to hear your younger son is having some better days! That must be a bit of a relief.
 
He is a sweet guy Jen. Both sons have good souls & are loving, but both are quite zany too. Crazy really! 2015.....a better year?
 
I am enjoying a quiet day at home with my husband, rather than going to the women's Christmas "fun day". I decided I would rather go to the dentist than attend, so happily chose not to go. I felt great after making that decision.

I have made a white chocolate/fruit slice, for the GK's mainly, for Christmas. It looks good anyway.

The GK's food preference list for Christmas dinner comprises mostly fresh fruit!

I am really looking forward to Christmas day as it will be just the 2 of us, both sons & our 3 grand-kids & no-one else! :santa:

I am eating really well ( lots of fresh fruit & salads) & getting my exercise from house-cleaning & gardening mostly. I will be playing golf on Saturday.
 
I had a lovely day at home & don't regret not going at all :D
We went out to the last 8-ball match until after Xmas & I filled in for a player who wanted to go home early. We were 6 all & I played a young guy who had won his 1st 2 games. I played really well & won, to make it 7-6 & then we ended up winning 9-6. It was so much fun!
We are off to Launceston again today. My LH has another ap't with the Urologist re his prostrate. Hopefully he will get the all clear. We are doing some Xmas shopping as well.
 
Enjoy your trip and fingers crossed on your husband's results.

And a white chocolate fruit slice sounds awfully good right now...
 
We had a really good day Vee thanks. The news from the Urologist was OK. My LH's PSA went from 4.4 to 5 in the year before the last test, but has gone from 5 to 6 in the last 4 months. Apparently it is on the high side of normal. At the moment he wants to monitor him & see him again after another PSA test in 4 months time &, depending on how it is then, it may be necessary to have a biopsy. He didn't seem too bothered, so we won't be either.
The white chocolate fruit slice looks very yummy & so does the dark chocolate one I did later. We might sample them on Sunday night when we have our Sunday night "treats". There is way too much for Xmas day as the GK's are now not staying the night.
Our OS, D, told the kids about splitting with his GF & the littlies were upset but OK & the older GS asked if he was OK. Sweet.
We had a good day today. We did a tip run & spent ages tidying up at the golf club & then visited our OS & the GK's for hours. Had a lovely time! I'm doing well food-wise, considering the time of year.
BTW-our YS, R, has met someone new & sounds really happy & excited! Fingers & toes crossed (& anything else I can possibly cross!). I hope he doesn't come crashing down!

I haven't weighed for a week so had better do so soon. I might have a dry January along with Han, depending on my weight after Xmas.......
 
Thanks LaMa.
I weighed this morning & I have "gained" 1kg. The day after a big golf day the scale is always up! It will go away again. I'll weigh again in a couple of days. I'm not going to worry about it though. I plan on losing 1kg in January, .5kg in Feb, .5kg in Mar, .5kg in April.......
I would have walked a good 10km yesterday up & down hills. We were runners up in the Christmas tournament & I had a great day. I played in a group with my LH & 2 other men, who were good company. One dressed as an elf! :santa:
I think we'll have a pottering about day today, with maybe some more house-cleaning/gardening thrown in.Feeling tired, but good, xo Cate
 
I find Christmas too stressful. I love that it's Summer here, but I find there's too much expectation, life seems accentuated, losses feel greater etc. It's an exaggerated time. I am always glad when Christmas day is over, which is a shame really. It's like wishing your life away. 2014 has been a tough year& maybe I'm reacting to that. I'll be glad to see the last of it.
( I have edited this post as I must have typed it when I was feeling really down & over-reacted.)
 
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