My day-I went to my doctor first thing & had a good talk to her. She's arranging for me to see a physio re specific exercises for me. She was so sweet. She told me I have come so far & she hates to see me slip back to where I was a year ago. She can see that my job would end up depressing me just like the last one. I told her I am reducing my hours until I find something else.My blood pressure is good- 110/60. She even went & borrowed another bp machine as I was talking about the family as she was taking it & she doubted it was accurate. It was. She goes to gypsy dancing classes which she loves & suggested I go along. I have missed 2 already & it's a beginners class. I will ring & find out if I can start next week.My cold is much better today & again I did not feel miserable once. I decided against anti-depressants while with her & am not going to do anything about my gall stones as they remove your gall bladder. I will wait & see if I have major problems before I have it done. She agrees that you should not have surgery unless essential.She didn't know of a naturopath but I told her "that's ok, you're not meant to know everything".I then went to the hairdresser & was able to tell her exactly how I wanted my hair. I have worn it really short for years & have decided to have it a bit longer & not so thinned out. I am going to start fussing over it a bit- using wax, gel etc. I used to think having my hair short made me appear slimmer(??!! doh!)** I did a lot of walking, some shopping. Bought a great black top at an op shop & returned some pants that didn't fit-too short in the body & exchanged them for 3 long-sleeved tops, different colours for winter. More money of course, but not too serious.
I've done it- I've been able to re-commit to Cohens!I didn't want to say anything until I felt I could get through a couple of days. I've taken back control of my eating. I have to wait until I buy new bathroom scales next Monday in Devonport to know what I weigh but this is good. I am fairly sure that my old scales were inaccurate & fear that I weigh about 4-5 more kilos than I think I do. I still lost 36kgs but could explain why I am having trouble stabilising. If it is the case I will get back in touch with Lisa, my consultant & ask her what to do.
The fact that I cannot weigh means I can't even think about the juggling act I have been doing for the last couple of months. It is helping me to be strict. If I am not eating any carbs, other than Saladas & sticking to the program (I'm not weighing though) I know I will lose weight. That is the joy of Cohen's. The confidence that it does work. I feel great that I am back in the zone. Now I have to sort out the job situation.
I took a book to work the other day & that stopped me doing all their housework. I love reading. It felt funny but this is what I have been advised to do rather than their housework. The family are not meant to become dependant on me. My allergies are really bad after a day in their home. I really notice the difference on my days off. I still don't have my new roster so haven't a clue what I am working for the next month. We were meant to get them last week. I hope they give me all the days off I have asked for. That may alter how long I am going to stay in the job.
I feel great after a day off, even better after 2 or 3 in a row. I think I could cope with 2 days a week fairly easily, especially if they were not together. I like earning money & being able to spend it, feeling that it's mine to spend.
OK folks, enough of my gas-bagging. I just wanted to say that I am re-focussing & determined to get back to my old positive happy self. I have also decided that I will probably go bush-walking on Tuesday, rather than the client's physio get-together with the support workers as I cannot see what earthly good it will do. She has a very serious attitude about the low worth of SW's & makes you feel like a germ. Who needs that?! I am missing the bush-walking. I also bumped into one of the Wackies today at the doctor's, who said they had been wondering where I was & had assumed I had been asked to work on Tuesdays. It was really nice to hear that they had missed me as it feels like they a bit of a clique sometimes & I'm a newbie.
Working tomorrow- I'll take the book again. It's hilarious & very light reading & is a wonderful contrast to my job. Hopefully my client will be starting to feel a lot better & more positive. I would like to be able to engage her in something positive tomorrow, perhaps a "walk" up the street or some cooking.
It's her birthday at the week-end & she's not been at all excited or looking forward to it. I find that sad. Every birthday is worth celebrating as you never know how many you have left! I have bought her a small present & a very funny, very appropriate card. I know I'm probably not meant to do that either, but hey..... how could I not?!
I might take my laptop to work as we talked about me doing her a cd. I might let her choose the songs from my play-list. I have lots of songs saved on my computer from cd's that I own. That should be a bit of fun. Good idea! Just thought of that one, cheers, Cate