Cate's Diary

Thanks, Hana, Cory & LaMa. I should have known that I wouldn't get away with a pat, polite answer with the women. I got through the golf game really well. I told A, our captain before we played, as I thought it polite to do so. I played with B, the secretary & she was polite & friendly. We had a lovely game & R & I had a good score.
We had a meeting after the game & there was no mention, which was good. It was after most of the women had gone & it was the usual half dozen including me left that I told them that G & I were no longer on the committee. When pressed I told them why. One woman was visibly upset. I got nothing but total support. I told them much more than I had planned, but I don't regret it. G would have cringed. I swore a fair bit.
I didn't go with G to watch the grand final of the 8-ball. Instead, I stayed home & stuffed my face(but didn't drink). I am still really angry about it all & I took it out on myself. There is a lot to this that I am not mentioning. It will take some time for things to settle down. Neither of us is good with conflict. Meanwhile, we are both going out to run the chook run tonight because G had said we would. One of the committee rang him yesterday to say how sorry he was that G had resigned & during that conversation said that no-one had volunteered to be bar manager, but that D (the DH captain) would be ordering the beer. G said I would continue to order the soft drink etc if they wanted me too. WTF? That is not happening.

I just booked front row seats for a show called RocKwiz that's going on tour in June & coming to Tassie. G & I went years & years ago & just loved it. It is one of our favourite TV shows.

I'm fasting today as we may go to L city tomorrow. We need to do some shopping & I need a haircut. Hopefully, I will wake up tomorrow feeling more positive than I do today.
 
Hang in there cate, dealing with the personalities you find on a sports club committee can be hell.

good effort getting front row seats, I watch occasionally.
 
I'm sorry you couldn't get out of there cleanly and without additional unpleasantness. Unfortunately, it's almost never easy to extract yourself from that kind of situation without some kind of conflict.
 
Thanks Tru, Cory & LaMa. I'm out at the clubhouse now & I just can't cope. The dh captain has done a massive shop & it is SO wrong! He has just dumped it & not put anything in the fridge. I am not going to do the bar again except for vets day & women's day. I am going to have to find a way to get through this! Faaaaaaarck!!!!!!
 
Arseholes will be arseholes. Putting up with it and ironing out their suckiness to make it easier for all the others only lets them be sucky for longer. Glad you´re pulling the brakes hon.
 
The bar is not your problem anymore. That's for him to sort out. People know you aren't doing it anymore, so if it's not done properly, it's on him.

It sounds really stressful Cate, I'm really sorry, but it's politics and egos everywhere, and sometimes they're impossible to navigate without getting stung. Hanging out at the clubhouse and lamenting the mess it's in isn't going to make you feel good.
 
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Thanks, LaMa & Emily. I do have to somehow find a way to get through this. I hardly slept last night & everything churned & churned. My brain just wouldn't stop. G is trying to smooth everything over, instead of actually saying why we quit & he keeps saying he'll help out. He's coping better than me, that's for sure. I just have to stop caring so much.
On a good note, I managed to drop a kilo.
 
:D Saying you´ll help out can help smooth things over but... only if you can then consistently say no when people actually ask. You can do this, hon, it just takes a bit of time.
 
Thanks, Cory & LaMa. You know LaMa, I am really tired of smoothing things over & I can say no. I love G, but sometimes I wish he would stick up for himself more. I will get through this. I have to.
I have had a lovely day. We went to L city today & both had haircuts. I struck a new hairdresser & didn't much like her or her cut, but it's OK. I usually do G's, but today he decided to have his done there too. I think that was to save me the trouble. I thought it would be a better cut than mine, but it certainly isn't. We bought some things for our trip. G got 2 pairs of travel shorts(ex-officio- I love that brand) & I got a pair of Teva hiking sneakers. We met one of his sisters & one of his brothers & SIL & had lunch with them. If it wasn't for me G would not organise this. I give him a gentle push. We had a lovely chat & a nice, very light lunch.
We left them & then did a good wine shop & are currently having a delicious Prosecco. We bought some stuff for the chook run & this will most likely be the last shop I do for the golf club. If G wants to volunteer to do anything else at the club I will make it clear that it will be just him & not me.
I am feeling much better today, even though I didn't get much sleep. Hopefully I will feel a little better each day.
 
I guarantee that this time next week you will be feeling completely at peace with your decision. Glad you had a nice day in the city. Have a great weekend.
 
You're letting your "child" out into the world, Cate, it makes sense you're emotionally connected to the club like that. Remind yourself of the Godfather quote "It's not personal, it's business." You're making this decision for your own well-being, and if the headaches continue for people who go there, it will resolve itself. Either someone else steps in, they figure out how to make it more better, they accept it's a shitshow, or it folds.

Glad you and G had a nice day!
 
Thanks, LJ. If they had just let me continue doing my job & doing it well I would still be doing it. I'm glad I am no longer on the Committee, though.

I had a great night's sleep! Autumn has arrived. It was misty this morning & cool. I am really starting to get excited about going to Sri Lanka now! I have a fairly free day today & only have the boys for about 4 hours. D is going to pick them up about 2.45 & take them fishing. G is playing golf.
 
I thought I would be ok today, but I really struggled. I'm obviously still not over it. Hopefully, I'll get there soon!
 
I just saw this & thought it worth sharing xo
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Thanks, Han xo (I always think of you as Han, but add the a at the end usually, just in case you don't like it)
I made Pho Bo yesterday & skimmed the fat off the top this morning & have 6 fairly large containers of it, 5 of which are now in the freezer. I'm fasting today, but haven't weighed myself for a few days. I will tomorrow. I feel as if I have lost some weight.

I haven't done many steps but have done 5km on my bike each of the last 2 days.

Our YS, R rang yesterday & he is very down. We had a really good talk & I told him that I was down too. We both were a bit teary at one stage but we also made one another laugh a little & both agreed that we are good for one another. I'm looking forward to seeing him next Sunday. Since he was diagnosed with bipolar we are both more able to talk about how we feel & it is much better having it out in the open. I suggested it was time he went back to see his counsellor. He is working towards reducing some of his stress & we talked about how to do that.

OK. I am going to do some gardening today I think. G & I are taking some barley straw down to D's chooks & letting them out. Then we'll come back & do some gardening. Some outside time required I think!
 
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