Cate's Diary

Had a lazy day on Sunday as I was really tired & probably reacting to all the fragrances from the night before. Yesterday I took our YS into see Orthopedics & a Physio & that was a really beneficial visit. He now has a clear idea of how he will heal & how he can help to heal faster & better. It was very positive! We also sorted out some other things & had a chance to do a little shopping. I quickly grabbed us some sushi (4 for me-6 for him.) We sorted out his income support & advised them that it will not be required soon. My LH was helping out in the pub kitchen last night as they had lots of bookings so I didn't feel like going home to an empty house. I chose what I thought would be a healthy option(an entree) but they "spoiled" me by making it a double size. I'll have to have a chat to see what I can eat there that will suit me. I haven't wanted to sound bossy or picky but have to speak up or I won't be able to eat there & that would be a shame. I'm trying hard to physche myself up to go back on Cohen's at least for 2 weeks. It's sooo hard. I feel soooo fat!!!

I visited my Mum before dinner last night & trimmed her facial hair. I have been trying to get the courage to ask her if I could as I didn't want to offend her. I did it with so much love & affection- that's how it felt. Her nose hairs were the worst. I couldn't pluck so had to snip. She didn't seem to mind.

Sometimes I'm typing & I think- "How boring" and this is one of those times so I'll spare you & STOP!

Love to all, xoxo Cate.
 
Snapped out my self pity after being inspired by a sensational, photo of a friend online & got moving! Hi Joh, if you read this. I decided against a long walk & gardened for hours instead ! I will ache tomorrow but it will be worth it. I have eaten really well & very little today & must admit to being REALLY hungry. I have to do something though so have started.
Feeling much happier this afternoon! :)
Cheers, Cate
 
AHi darlin! Can't believe my funny picture was so inspirational for you :) That makes me feel so great! I imagine that hours of gardening certainly would make anyone feel hungry...

Haven't started talking to my belly yet... it's kind of funny how practical I am being about the whole thing. I bet when I get to the week where I know Beanie can register sound, I'll be singing and talking all day long. Eee that makes me excited! Maybe I should start already... it feels weird though!

What happened to your mini non-ticker?

xxx much love, lovely :grouphug:
 
Hi Joh, I tried getting a ticker from ticker factory & accidentally lost my other one so gave up on it (temporarily.) You look great in that photo & it's especially good because you were not feeling self-conscious as you were showing your "mini bump". I have started feeling self-conscious again so must do something about it. Yesterday was a great start! Time for my morning coffee, then off to tai Chi with lunch at the pub our YS is helping run. I'm asking for a big salad today with grilled chicken breast & balsamic vinaigrette & hopefully that should be a much better choice. Our son has one made for him most days. The chef is inclined to add sauces to everything & I want healthy!! Time to head, much love xoxo Cate
 
Where did the last 2 days go? Had a delicious chicken breast salad on Wednesday & enjoyed the company immensely. Went out to 8-ball that night & skipped supper & drank herbal tea, diet ginger beer & water. Went to town yesterday (120km return) as I had booked my LH in for a golf lesson as his game has been deteriorating & it was really getting him down. It was a good idea as he's now feeling confident again. I didn't like seeing him like that. While he was having his lesson I went to a hairdressers where you can just walk in & they do only cuts (no smelly perms etc) & was lucky enough to get a hairdresser who cut my hair really well 9 months ago. She was amazed that I remembered her. That's funny. Hopefully I will be able to see her next time. She gave me a razor cut & it's very short. I asked her to do it that way. When we called in to see our YS on our way home he said "Great haircut Mum. It's very short." We didn't get home until 2.30, picked up our OGS off the bus & then back into our local town for Tae Kwon Do. It was a full-on but successful & pleasant day. I'm a bit tired today but we're not doing much during the day & going out to the pub my son is at tonight for dinner & music. 2 brothers from Hobart who are friends of our YS will be singing. Our OS & the 3 grand-kids will be there too, early on. I'm looking forward to the night, but not the perfume.

I have been eating very healthily and feel that I have lost a little weight but will weigh on Monday. I can feel myself building up to going on Cohen's 100% & I know that I have to be feeling really positive & committed first. Getting there. It will have to be for less than 2 weeks at a time so I don't have to do re-feed though. My social life seems to have sky-rocketed lately. I must say I am enjoying it but don't enjoy the excess weight. At least I'm learning to make better choices while I'm out. When I did Cohen's originally I didn't really eat out. The not wanting to offend the cook is the hardest part!

Lots of love to you all, xoxo Cate
 
ASounds like a busy day! Didn't realise you were so far away from town... crazy! :)

Would love to see a pic of your haricut!

Good work for eating healthily lately - looking forward to Monday's weigh in! You're right about having to be completely committed to cohens before even thinking about going on it. I hate the fact that you might have to give up your fandalgled social life for your eating though - can you just keep trying to make the healthy choices and let your weight go down gradually? Maybe there will be a major lull in events sometime and you can kick cohens into gear then instead.... just a thought!

x
 
Hi Joh, We live only 11km away from a small rural town, where we do our everyday shopping & where our YS's pub is, my Mum etc & are in between 2 small "cities"- one is 60km away (we call that 'town') & the other is 40km away. Our local town has one of most types of shops- butcher, supermarket, fruit & veg, clothes etc, 3 op shops, whole-foods, a few second-hand & antique stores, craft, a few art galleries, a few real estate agents, few banks, 2 hairdressers etc. The actual population is only just over 2,000 but we are very well catered for. We go to 'town' for major purchases, variety with clothes etc (& haircuts for me anyway.)

It feels remote where we are though, as we can only see one house that would be 5km from ours but we can still get to just about anywhere in Tassie in no time. It's about 2.5hrs to Hobart & 1.5hrs to Cradle Mountain for example.

I'll take a photo of my haircut when I feel like I'm having a good hair day. It's so short I'll have to wash it every day I go anywhere & fluff it up a bit. The music was great at the Bush (YS's pub) last night. 2 brothers(friends of our YS) from Hobart played guitar & sang our kind of music, sung originally by John Lennon, Neil Young, George Harrison, Bob Dylan, Bruce Springsteen,The Doors etc. They were great! It was a shame that they had to compete with an AFL final though & hardly anyone showed up in the lounge. The dining-room was packed but they had all gone by 10pm. As we drove home I noticed that most places were closed early. People stay at home to watch the football. Even my LH wanted to leave at 10 so that he could watch the finish of the game. He loves his music but also loves the footy.

The guys Mum & her partner had travelled up & were staying the night & will be again tonight. They asked her to sing a number with them & she just got up & sang "You make me feel like a natural woman" and was absolutely sensational!!! We had sat with them & when her sons were having a break she suggested that they have a "sesh" on Sat afternoon, about 3.30 to which they agreed. My LH is playing golf & I am going to visit Mum after lunch & maybe take her out for afternoon tea & then we are meeting there at 4pm to enjoy the music & then we'll come home for dinner.

I am enjoying my social life but it means spending more money than I have really so have to curtail it a little. I am making better choices esp. now that the cook is getting used to what I want to eat. I really didn't want to upset her as our YS has gone into business with her, her husband & their son.

I'm looking forward to weighing too. I think I will have lost a little but I also think that I have a way to go- probably at least 5kg before my clothes are loose again. I think I need to have at least one week of being really strict to quickly shake off a few kilos. Cohen's can squeeze in there somewhere in October I reckon.....I hope.....

Thanks for your visit Joh. I read your diary every day xoxo Cate
 
Spring has sprung & I know that losing 5ks will make me feel a lot more comfortable in my own skin(& my clothes!) & it's getting me down a bit. Weighed myself yesterday & am 85kg. I had weighed 86 a few days before that! It's doing my head in a little I must admit & I do need to wake up one day soon & say "Right- this is it!" & lose a few quick kilos. Losing weight inspires me to exercise, rather than the other way around, or even trying to do the 2 together. I just can't seem to get motivated at the moment. I know what to do I just can't seem to actually do it! HELP!! My weight had settled & I was maintaining fairly easily but then it took an upward slide & nothing I do seems to bring it back down. It's like my body has a Cohen's(really low carbs) memory & that will be the only way I can lose. Cutting down meal portions, cutting out rubbish etc just doesn't seem to cut it for me. *sigh* *moan* Driving myself crazy here so will go.

Love to all, xo Cate

PS. Was gardening yesterday when got a call from our YS asking to be picked up & brought home for the night. His leg is reacting to something- either the compression stocking, the Vitamin E cream or the Silicone seal (most likely) for the scar. He was very down & very tired. He has a doctor's ap't this afternoon to make sure it's not infected, that I will take him to & then I am taking my Mum for a haircut. He seemed better by bed-time and we did lots of talking. I think he needed to get away from the pub to switch off. He's still asleep so hopefully will feel better today.
 
Talking to yourself is the first sign of madness(but at least I only occasionally answer myself) but here I go again-

Eating healthily, feeling a little better physically, had a rough time yesterday with Mum (long story & can't be bothered) & at least I didn't eat chocolate or stuff my face with anything I shouldn't. That's a big step. I almost cried tears of frustration & told my LH to just put me in a home & visit once a week when I go senile. Yes, I do picture myself going senile. Genetics are against me. My mother's mother, my mother......

I am moody & emotional at the moment & getting very stressed out over little things- very touchy. It is monotonous to write about it in here. I need to focus on myself again- on my health, on being more active & maybe it's time to just chill out on my own for a while somehow. It's up to me what I choose to do with my life so it will up to me to organise how I'm going to do it. I can feel that my mental health is strained.

I have been to Tai Chi today & lunch at the Bush (again.) My LH has been doing volunteer work at the golf club- mowing grass & chopping wood.(22km return trip)

We're going out to 8-ball again tonight(22km return), going to the dentist tomorrow(80km return trip) & then GS tomorrow night & another trip to our local town(22km return) for his Tae Kwon Do. How did I ever work?

My life has gone from one of solitude & peace & quiet & many days where I didn't venture out to a very busy social life. I'm not certain which I prefer. Somewhere in between I think & that's probably the same with most of the world's population. I know I have a good life & I'll be back to feeling on top of things again soon. These moods pass. I prefer to work my way through them without medication etc.

Enough grizzling for now. My diary is my therapy but I do apologise.

Lots of love to all, xoxo Cate
 
For some weird & not so wonderful reason I decided not to have a needle at the dentist. I thought my few fillings would be painless as they were just superficial. BIG mistake! One of my teeth collapsed & I had to have lots of drilling. I also had to have this horrible metal strip dug into my gums as they were growing over the tooth apparently. How gross! I'll stop now. It was horrible. I had a panic attack during it as I couldn't breathe & thought I was about to have an asthma attack. I had to get him to stop so that I could deep breathe my way out of it but then he had to re-attach the metal around the tooth & into my gums again. It really hurt & my face is still aching. To make matters even worse the bill was only just under $1,000. A day best forgotten! Our dentist is a lovely man. It wasn't his fault. Apparently he thinks the decay may stem from my asthma medication, making my mouth dry. I had asked him if it might be from eating apples but he thought not.

Weight I feel may be down a little, but will wait until Monday to weigh. Feeling a little bit more on top of things, although still a little grumpy.

Love to all, xoxo Cate.
 
Deep breath!!! I just lost a long post because my screen just froze, trying to place a bloody smilie. I used to mostly type them in before!!! Grrrrr!!!!

Start again-

I had a really fun night last night & a lovely day at home yesterday, mostly just pottering about, planting out vegetable seedlings etc. My LH's 8-ball team had their celebratory end-of-season dinner at the pub our YS is in. Early on our OS & the 3 GK's were there too so that was nice. There was live music and we all had a ball. They played lots of 8-ball & had lots of laughs. Some guy from Sydney, who was with a bunch of 10 friends was trying to get me up on the dance floor & I was resisting nicely I thought, when my cheeky LH walked past & said "She's a really good dancer!" I had one dance with him & he was trying to get just a little bit too familiar(arm around my waist when I tried to move away) so I said I'd have a dance with him later & went back amongst the 8-ballers. He would have had to go around the table & in amongst them so that worked. It was quite funny really & just added to a fun night. Everyone seemed to have a ball. The meal was great & the atmosphere was fun. All in all a cracking night.

My Mum rang early this morning asking to come out to our place to get away from "the football madness" which is the AFL grand final on this afternoon. For Joh- it's between Collingwood & Geelong. I don't have much of a preference but I suppose I prefer Geelong ahead of Coll. It's St Kilda's turn!!!! They're just not good enough :( I asked my LH if he could pick Mum up after golf & bring her out & then I'll take her back later today. She probably will not want to stay too long anyway but I was going to go visit her this morning so am now staying at home. I'm fairly tired from our late night but am feeling quite energised & am in a good mood :D Sounds like a contradiction I know, but there's good & bad tired. Tired after a really fun night out is good!

I'm feeling much more positive about life again. It's cyclical but harder to evaluate when you are passed the hormonal stage. well, I think I am anyway. Harder to tell when you're wombless.

I'm hoping that I have lost a kilo when I weigh on Monday. If not I'm going back on Cohen's for a week anyway. I only decided that while I was typing!

Lots of love to everyone.

xoxoxo Cate
 
Spring-cleaned for most of the day yesterday & re-arranged furniture (one of my favourite pastimes). My LH arrived home about 2.30pm, with my mother.

My Mum declared that she was sick of the football by half-time so I took her down to the local cafe, where she then declared that she wanted a coffee. She had just left a cup of tea unfinished at our place, so I suggested having one when she got back instead. I bought her 2 little apple cakes to have after dinner. She said she'd eat both that night. I took a while to get her back & then changed her clocks, as last night we switched to daylight savings :D Mum apologised for "doing that to me" ie getting her brought out here & then needing to drive her back again, but I reassured her that I was going to go visit her at one stage anyway & that it was ok. I think she liked coming out to our home & it was a break for her. My LH had the tv on so soft he could barely hear it, which was sweet of him as I know he loves the AFL GF. Geelong won thank goodness. I wish our team was as good!

Had another healthy eating day. :D

We have our OS , the 3 GK's & a friend of his coming for dinner tonight. His friend has given our son a few things over the last few years, to give to his dad, to put in our snooker room & we thought we would invite him for dinner as he now lives on his own, since his wife died in her fifties. We are having salmon fillets with salad, followed by a gluten-free bread and butter pudding. I had better get a wiggle on as more spring cleaning is required & apparently I need to go do some more shopping!

Love to all, xoxo Cate
 
We had such a lovely night. Not only did we have the company of our OS's lovely older friend but also our OGS was dropped off by his best friend's parents & we invited them in & they stayed for quite a while, the kids all were good & we had an absolutely delightful evening.

Today was a day right out of the box. It was warm & sunny & we now have daylight savings & it was bliss. I LOVE Spring, I LOVE sunlight and I feel great!

Love to all, xoxo Cate
 
Another beautiful Spring day! It looks almost perfect. I don't feel like going anywhere though so I think I'll ring Mum & tell her I'll be in tomorrow morning before Tai Chi, early enough so that I can take her up the street if she likes. I think I'll go for a walk today & maybe do my weights. I haven't weighed yet. I eat better when I don't know what I weigh, but I'm just delaying the inevitable(going back on Cohen's for a while.) I'm in temporary denial :)

I'm eating very healthily but also am feeling fairly fat & something is bloating my stomach. My clothes are tight.......

I will also catch up with some ironing today (boring) so that I can take some more of Mum's clothes in to her. I hope she doesn't mind too much my not coming in. I didn't say that I definitely was but I know she looks forward to it. It feels like a big responsibility & hopefully I'll keep getting more used to it & feeling less stressed & pressured by it & more relaxed. I must try.

Time to get moving!

Love to all, xo Cate
 
AHi lovely! Man I HAAAAATE it when you write a big post and then lose it all! GRRRRR!

Sorry to hear you've been having a few ups and downs... I remember you saying in my diary once ages ago how much more obvious these life changes are when we write every day! And how true that is....

I remember that I had about six weeks where I was eating healthy, exercising a lot, and I lost NOTHING! But then BAM it all went off really quickly!
 
Hi sweetie, Thanks so much for visiting me in my diary. I really do like it when you do. I read yours every day. Today has been WEIRD! I dropped my LH off at our YS's pub & then went up the street, thinking I would do a slow op-shop shop, library etc. Most of the shops were shut for the Launceston Show. Doh! When you no longer work it's hard to even notice things like public holidays these days. I actually bought a faun coloured trench coat, a faun summer shirt & a black light cotton t-shirtie/blouse & wandered into an antique shop for a look. When I came out there was an older woman(70'ish?) sitting in a chair out front, looking fairly hot & flustered. While I was walking slowly past, thinking she didn't look right, she fainted onto the concrete. I sang out to the shop-keeper to ring an ambulance & I waited until she came to & then carefully sat her up & propped her up against me (like I was a chair) so that she couldn't fall over again. Some people tried to help her up & others to get her a drink but the ambulance said not to give her anything so I just stayed with her, propping her up & talking calmly until they got there. I chatted to her, asked where she lived etc & asked if there was anyone she wanted me to ring. She was quite adamant that her husband not be contacted.

When the ambulance got there I was able to tell them that she had once had a stroke & had been very hot when she fainted. While she was being loaded into the ambulance my phone rang & it was my LH saying our YS had an accident & needed to get to the doctors. The ambulance driver asked me how he was injured but I did not know. I drove to the pub & our YS had been burned on the face. He had been trying to light the gas stove for his Dad. Apparently a big flame shot out at his face & he fell to the floor. He had put cold water on his face immediately. I drove him to the doctors who they were ringing as I left. When I got to the doctors they were shut so I rang the pub back & they told me that the call centre that they had been put through to said to ring an ambulance & have him taken into Launceston. I raced down the street & caught the ambulance before it left & they took him in. I went back & picked up my LH & we went into town. When I got to emergency he was covered in some burn gel & some weird & wonderful burns stuff & was about to be seen by the plastics specialist.

They said it may be a while so I gave him a kiss & said we'd grab a quick bite in the canteen.

My LH had a big bread roll & I had a fruit platter(with 2 crackers & a tiny piece of cheese & DID NOT HAVE THE LEMON MERINGUE PIE OR THE CHEESE-CAKE!!!!!

We got back to emergency & the plastics specialist was with him & he said that the burns were not serious & he could go home. His face which had looked awful when he went in looked much better. They gave him cream & good advice & he is currently asleep in my recliner after having a cold shower & applying some cream. It was a big shock for all of us but I am drinking herbal tea, not wine at the moment & didn't stuff my face with something sweet & sickly that I would have really regretted.

The woman that collapsed in the street I will visit in a few days. I told her my name & that I would call in. I don't think she knows many people in the town at all. They took her in to do an ECG. I think she'll be ok but i will check up on her after the w/e. I have the GK's for 2 days as of tomorrow lunch. Our YS thinks he will be ok to work tomorrow night.

I feel ok now but it did shake me up. It shook my LH up as he saw the flame shooting towards our son & it must have been very frightening for them both. Our YS said he'll never forget it.

I probably won't be back until tomorrow morning & then probably only briefly.

Much love to all, xoxo Cate
 
Hi Cate,


I'm new in this forum - and found that only you thread is active. I've started my Cohen journey about five days ago - but lovely to see other people doing the same thing too!
 
testing, testing!! This forum is playing up & I have lost 3 posts so far. WELCOME PURPLEPALET!! I'll post again tomorrow if I'm able. So tired tonight xoC
 
Hi purplepalet- I have also replied to you in a PM- see notifications. :D

Having the 3 grand-kids for 3 days & 2 nights has left me feeling absolutely knackered. I'll be back when my brain is working properly again. Alls' well, just really, really tired! Much love to the universe xoxo Cate
 
Feeling good today after a very hectic w/e. Have been into town with my LH & caught up with my MIL, dropped her off down the street, took my Mum shopping, bought myself 3 nice Summer tops(1 salmon pink, 1 pale blue & 1 white) at the op-shop, Mum got books & a summer hand bag, visited our YS & was given a sample yummy salmon lunch & had a lovely time. Am now copying some music to play at our home 8-ball games to provide some pleasant background music. Well...it's our taste anyway. I'm doing some CD's but copying ours onto itunes & then dragging a couple of tracks from each CD onto each playlist so that I don't have to concentrate so much on whether I have already copied them. It will be good to have most of our music onto iTunes because then I'll copy it all onto a USB as well. I also have a portable hard drive that I brought back with me from the US that I must work out how to copy onto itunes as it has my late BIL's entire blues collection on it.

I am feeling really good & don't feel so fat. I'll try to cut down on my eating & up my exercise & stick to Cohen's maintenance & hope to lose some. I had better weigh though. :( I'm not doing smilies any more as my computer keeps freezing up when I do. Only on WLF though, which is weird. I used to mainly type them in before.

Hope all are well & happy, xoxo Cate
 
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