Transformation Everyday

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elizab3th

elizab3th

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Hello, if anybody is reading this - I hope you are doing well! I think I may have found a quiet space on the web, not that I was looking for one, but if you're here with me and reading along then I'm happy to have you here!

And here I am indeed. Back at it again, with I believe what is my third journal. This time around I'm 30, not 21 or 19, and this time around I think my motivations have matured a bit. It's not all about vanity when you're 30 with heart palpitations and plagued with lethargy.

My situation, you ask... well, I'm currently working part-time. I think that not only will this allow me to learn to find balance in my life, but because I can't stay part-time forever, it lends a bit of urgency to the situation. I would like to get back into full time work early in spring 2018 - that leaves me with maybe 4-5 months to, basically, get my shit together.

Working full-time in a toxic environment is where I would like to place the blame for my weight gain, but in actuality, the blame is all on me. I didn't cope well with life and now I've found myself far off course, feeling discombobulated, out of touch, and ultimately, 70 lbs overweight. I don't want to turn 31 still in this state and I certainly don't want to waste another day hiding in my apartment because my clothes don't fit and my confidence is dangerously low.

70 lbs. has to go and it has to go now.

How do I do this? Daily affirmation, gratitude and logging of this "project" are my tools to stay motivated and accountable. I don't plan on killing it every day, but I do plan on being here every day and celebrating all my successes, big or small. This isn't a fitness challenge, or a weight loss plan. This is life, and this is me taking that first step (again) to start living it.

So, all that said, my elliptical is a mere 5 feet away from me, and is probably wondering why I'm giving it shifty side glances. Time to dust it off, dust myself off and get moving!

Change isn't going to come sitting in my computer chair!
 
Hi Elizabeth and welcome to our forum! Now is always the best time to make any change, so your timing is faultless :) Have you got a plan of attack for the changes you want to make? Specific things you (don´t) want to eat? Exercise regime? Do you know when you´re most vulnerable to overeating and what you need to do to avoid it? You don´t have to plan everything but it usually helps to be as specific as possible.
Best of luck, LaMa.
 
Hi, Elizabeth & welcome to the forum. This is a peaceful & supportive place. I hope we can help get you back on track & well & truly in the land of the living. Life is to be lived & enjoyed. Here's to positive change :beerchug: (but with black coffee) Cate
 
Stats
Starting weight: 210.6 lbs
Goal weight: 135-140 lb range (really not going to be picky about this one)

Measurements:
Bust - 48"
Chest - 41"
Waist - 45"
Hips - 48"
Midway - 51 1/2"
Thighs - 27 1/2"
Knees - 19"
Calves - 15"
Upper arm - 12"
Forearm - 9 1/2"

Yes, I know. That's a whole lot of measurements. Aside from weekly waist and thigh measurements (weigh-in will be Mondays!), I'll update the full list let's say... December 15th. Middle of every month, I think that sounds fair. I'm not terribly pleased about the numbers I've come up with, but hey - what did I expect? To be disappointed, yes. To see them this high, no. Okay, that's okay. I'm not going to get discouraged on my second post. Moving on!

A brief glance through this site, and I'm realizing it's not as calm as it seems on the surface. I'm thrilled to know we're all pursuing our goals in good company!

LaMaria said:
Hi Elizabeth and welcome to our forum! Now is always the best time to make any change, so your timing is faultless :) Have you got a plan of attack for the changes you want to make? Specific things you (don´t) want to eat? Exercise regime? Do you know when you´re most vulnerable to overeating and what you need to do to avoid it? You don´t have to plan everything but it usually helps to be as specific as possible.
Best of luck, LaMa.
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Hello, and thank you for the warm welcome, LaMa!

My arsenal is stocked. Hiit Training and cardio I will alternate, and on rest days I plan on getting on the floor with my cat and (at the very least) stretching! I expect the first couple of weeks to be a learning experience. My body has certainly changed in 10 years, so I'll have to figure out what my limitations are, and how not to over-do it!

We've already purged the apartment of its indulgent foods. It's not going to be easy, but I've kind of locked down any opportunity I have of excess snacking or binging. I know when my toughest times of the day are, and I'm keeping my trusty sidekick, my 24 oz cup of water, filled and always by my side because sometimes all it takes to shut those craving down is to chug a tall glass of water! (Also, I get to update my water-intake tracking app that has this very cute little blue emoji that smiles approvingly whenever I drink more water.. it's the little things!)

cate said:
Hi, Elizabeth & welcome to the forum. This is a peaceful & supportive place. I hope we can help get you back on track & well & truly in the land of the living. Life is to be lived & enjoyed. Here's to positive change :beerchug: (but with black coffee) Cate
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Thanks so much, Cate! I shall clink your glass with my tea! I am very happy to be here, even under the circumstances. This forum provided me with great support in previous years. I know I made the right decision to sign back into this account. :)
 
Day 1 - Success! It's a wee bit early to celebrate, but I have the rest of the evening planned out, and I am sticking to that plan!

During training, I did have a bit of a shocker. My knees are weak, and the joint gets very sore - very fast. I unfortunately didn't complete two sets of kettlebell swings, but I won't call that a failure. I substituted another exercise during my hiit circuit and completed the 30 mins sweaty and exhausted. Two sensations that I should start getting used to! I'm going to start taking glucosamine, and on the advice from my partner, I will purchase some neoprene knee braces. I really don't want to miss out of those squats!

Meals today, I have been thoroughly enjoying. Eggs, kashi bar, protein shake, kielbasa sausage and cheese for a snack, baked tilapia and a light caesar salad for dinner. I purchased a food scale a couple weeks ago, and was finally able to bust it out for tomorrow's meal prep.

Challenge of the day: actually getting physical within my own apartment, and I did it! :) I procrastinated for a couple of hours, but I got on that elliptical, and I got down on the floor. You really see how badly you need to vacuum when you're in plank position on the carpet.

With that extra energy after the workout, I was more productive than I have ever been on a day off. I think I'm going to sleep hard tonight!
All in all, day one was a breeze. My next challenge is to get my ass up at 6am and hop back on that elliptical before work tomorrow.

Goodnight! :sleeping:
 
Don´t remind me! One thing I´ve noticed about cleaning though: eating healthily means cleaning the oven is so much easier. No grease to deal with...
 
JohnMarshall said:
Go for it, Elizabeth. You can absolutely go this!
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Thank you for the support, John! One day at a time is how I'm looking at this right now. It can be a bit overwhelming otherwise, but soon enough this'll all be habit. I found a comment of yours in another thread, and you speak the truth. Weight-loss will come when I approach this as if it's not a diet! Diets are temporary, and my health sure isn't.
 
Good evening! Checking in from the bathtub. The DOMS has fully set in, and I feel a hot soak is deserved. As comfortable as I am in here, I will say one thing... my belly feels as sloshy as this tub - drinking 3L of water a day is hard!

Challenge of the day: no snacking. It's 9pm, I had a good dinner of chicken and broccoli, and while there's nothing terribly bad for me out there in the kitchen, I feel like I could eat everything out there. My caloric intake is on point though, so I think it's just about breaking the habit of late night binging that my stomach is used to.

Successes for the day?

I did get up at 6am and got on the elliptical for 20 minutes.
I didn't eat one kernel from the (free) popcorn machine we have at work.
I am down from 210.6 lbs to 206 lbs.
I got some after work exercises in.
I have a lot of energy!

I downloaded an app. It's a daily gratitude log, and I think it'll help with the overall attitude adjustment I'm trying to work on. Two things I'm grateful for today? Hot sauce and my elliptical. Hot sauce, because I literally cannot each a meal without some injection of capsaicin and my elliptical because I get to work out in my underwear.

I think that's all for today. Tomorrow I'm off work again, so it's time for me to go make my plan of attack!

PS. Does anybody else reading this need hot sauce in their life as much as I do?
 
Hm, I drink hot water with a sliced-up clove of garlic instead of tea sometimes... But at least everyone can be sure we're not vampires!
 
Early morning discorvery: if you lay under your cats favourite blanket, you get a free massage.

Oh, this is delightful for my sore thighs.
 
I can really relate to your story! Affirmations are so helpful - thanks for the reminder. I read that if you say them right before falling asleep and right after waking up they work better - something about the subconscious mind grasping them more fully. Hope your day is successful!
 
Midday Update

I'm home alone, so not to bog down my own journal with entries so early on but I feel the need to type away and get a few things off my mind lest I go back to bed and spoil a whole day. This morning, at the crack of not-dawn (because it's winter and it's perpetually dark), my cat woke me up to let me know that he's bored and requires a 5am play session.

Mornings are not my thing. They never have been. In fact, in my previous job, the girls at work knew not to talk to me until an hour into the shift. I'd feel bad about that but they were not the best of people and I couldn't bring myself to join in their disingenuous babble. I have a lot of strong women in my life, but that group of women were just so shady, passive aggressive and plain ol' mean when someone's back was turned. I promise to not complain about this part of my past again, and thank you if you've listened. That mini-rant was necessary. I guess my point is - mornings suck(!!), but I'm really hoping to take them back and make them awesome. Okay, back to 5am with my furry jerk of a pet.

After unsuccessfully falling back asleep on the couch, I logged on to read how everyone on here is doing. Motivated by being online here provided me with this crazy idea... get on the damn elliptical. So I did, and I was able to add 5 minutes to my workout with relative ease and when my partner woke expecting to find me waiting to crawl back into bed, it felt great to instead be sweaty and preparing for a nice cold shower. I think it shocked him a bit, actually!

Don't get me wrong, I ended up going back to bed for a "morning nap". I'd like to say I could have stayed awake and kept myself busy with chores, but the reality is that these new habits of mine aren't yet actually habits and I'm very aware that come noon I would have probably grown terribly restless and that idleness opens up the door to cravings of all kinds.

Happiest moment so far, getting on the scale to see it say 202 lbs! That's 8.6 lbs lost (of course, mostly almost all water weight).

Challenge for the day: get dressed and walk to the grocery store to buy tomatoes, hummus, carrots and spinach for work snacks.

If anybody has any small snack ideas for me, I'd be eternally grateful!

In return, here is a picture of my cat, Jack, and the river valley blanketed in snow: https://imgur.com/a/f4SmV

Jenniquest said:
I can really relate to your story! Affirmations are so helpful - thanks for the reminder. I read that if you say them right before falling asleep and right after waking up they work better - something about the subconscious mind grasping them more fully. Hope your day is successful!
Click to expand...

That's a great idea, Jenni. Usually I'm repeating them while powering through that last 5 terribly minutes of my workout. I've got an empty notebook in my nightstand and I think I'm going to give it a try tonight. Write down at least ONE sentence that's positive and that I can come back to when inevitably I feel like I could give up.
 
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