Tired of being tired of being tired of being....ugh

Bouncewden

Bouncewden

New member
Ok, here it goes, with grammar mistakes and everything. I am 28, apparently joined this forum in May 2007, I had to be 24 or 25 at the time. I cannot believe four years later and I am at square -2, at that time I weighed 228, I am at 242 (as of Dec. 2th 2011). Time sure goes by when you are doing nothing, apparently.



This will have to be the lowest point of my life I will not accept anything lower than this moment and this feeling right now. I am determined to change all aspects of my life, personal, physical, and emotional. I feel like Bridget Jones (My favorite movie)!!!! Oh silly Bridget I was way too familiar with the granny panties, I too own them. [If you are a fat woman who likes to minimize your waist immediately you will know what I am talking about. I have about 8 pairs of the damn thing, except mine are way cooler since they are shorts that end-up right below your boobs (the shorts make me feel like a size 12, until I see the pictures and snap back to reality, proceed to take them off and ohh there goes gravity)]. Oh huge tummy slimming shorts I loathe putting you on, but I love the your slimming effects you are a master of deception and my best friend on nights out.






I am 5'7'' and had ballooned up to 264 which put me at a size 18 maybe 20. I got down to 225 for my friend's wedding last month which had me at a size 14. Alas I did not maintain it, I have been binge eating since and now I am 242 (a size 16). Saboteur!!! I see a little progress and immediately think I can eat whatever I want. I know how this diet thing works, why is it so hard to stick with it?

I have never attempted to write this or anything out, ever!! I must say I feel AHH-MAY-ZING!!!

So here is the goal:

1.) Get down to a size 8....maybe a 6 by this time next year.

2.) Put my finance degree to use or work toward my goal of owning a business by the age of 32 (I am 28 now)

3.) Be the best me ever!!





The bride and me







~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~





I saw these questions on scbibhouse post so I will answer them eventually.




1. What is your current height and weight?

- 5'7'' 242lbs

2. If you were at an ideal weight now, what would that weight be?

- Between 145-155 or a size 8 which ever comes first

3. At what weight would you like to be at four months from now?

- Under 200lbs

4. Why do you want to lose weight?

- Health and Vanity

5. Do you want to lose weight for a specific life event such as wedding or reunion? If so, when is that event?

- Those moments have come and gone.

6. What obstacles could get between you and your weight loss goals?

- Myself

7. Why do you think that you now have a weight problem?

8. What lifestyle changes do you think would help you lose weight?

9. Have you lost weight in the past? If so, what has worked in the past to help you lose weight?

10. Why do you believe that you did not lose weight or you gained the weight back?

11. What, if anything, has not worked for you in the past in helping you to lose weight? Why do you think it did not work?

12. Would you try writing down all food and drink consumed for a given period of time?

13. Do you cook at home often? If so, what do you cook?

14. How often do you go out to eat? Where do you go?

15. What are your three favorite foods?

16. What are your three favorite restaurants?

17. What are three things you can do differently when it comes to food?

18. If you woke up tomorrow and your body was exactly the way you want it, what would be different?

19. Do you eat when you are not hungry?

20. Do you binge eat (large amounts at a time)?

21. Do you hide your food or eat in secret?

22. Do you eat when you are sad, nervous, or depressed?

23. Do you eat as a reward?

24. Do you eat while watching TV or using the computer?

25. What do you normally eat for a meal?

26. What type of snacks do you eat?

27. In terms of exercise, what, if anything, are you currently doing?

28. Where do you go for exercise? A local public gym? School/work gym? Home?

29. What, if anything, are your three favorite types of exercise?

30. What is your daily/weekly/monthly/yearly motivation to move towards your goals?

31. Do you have rewards for certain goals?
 
Last edited:
So glad to see you started a diary!


I too have a few pair of those shorts, I swear I burn 50 calories just hiking those suckers up! When I was much heavier I would wear them constantly, my bf came to call it my armor because of the way it felt when he hugged me and also that I always had to have them on like a security blanket!


Are you really a 14 in that pic of you at the wedding? I think you look stunning! I bet when you lose weight it doesn't take much to notice a big change on you.


I was in a wedding in July which I practically starved myself (I know, bad!) to get down for, and then I put like 15 lbs on afterwards going crazy with the food, so I definitely feel like I can relate!


Great job making the diary, can't wait to follow your progress :)


What part of California are you from?
 
@Sparked - The dress said size 14, but it ran big, thank G/d, I think a 16 would have been a better fit. I was maid of honor and felt uncomfortable standing in front of everyone making a toast. When I was in my early 20's a 5-10lb loss would make a difference, now it's takes 10-15lbs.



You really did help inspire me. Thanks for replying to my message (I was actually was hungry at the time I read it. Contemplating what to eat next).



I live in L.A., Cheviot Hills to be exact. Where in California do you live?




Originally Posted by Sparked


So glad to see you started a diary!



I too have a few pair of those shorts, I swear I burn 50 calories just hiking those suckers up! When I was much heavier I would wear them constantly, my bf came to call it my armor because of the way it felt when he hugged me and also that I always had to have them on like a security blanket!



Are you really a 14 in that pic of you at the wedding? I think you look stunning! I bet when you lose weight it doesn't take much to notice a big change on you.



I was in a wedding in July which I practically starved myself (I know, bad!) to get down for, and then I put like 15 lbs on afterwards going crazy with the food, so I definitely feel like I can relate!



Great job making the diary, can't wait to follow your progress :)



What part of California are you from?
Click to expand...
 
Hi Bouncewden


Welcome (back?)! Sounds like you're done sabotaging yourself and ready to move forward. Sounds like you already know how to lose weight, but not so much with the maintenance.


Sooo.... what's your plan for your new healthier lifestyle (counting calories, caveman diet, water aerobics, couch to 5k)?


However you go about it, I'm sure you already know you'll get lots of support on this board. I, for one, will be following you because I found your post charming. And we're almost the same height & age (and college major). Also, those spanxs-esque underthangs are awful, constrictive, sweaty and I support anyone who wants to be free of them!


As for me, I'm on my second week of no sugar. Makes me a beast to be around sometimes. But, I'm addicted to sugar and pretty sure it's killing me not so softly. Cutting sugar has really eliminated a lot of gross foods and jump started my weight loss. Right now I'm just trying to break the habit. Maybe one day I can have a small piece of chocolate and not go on a bender. But, for now.... no processed sugar.


My other goal has just been moving my butt off the couch. Talk a damn walk somewhere. Once I break a sweat, I instantly feel better about myself. I totally relate to the temptation of "hey I lost 20 pounds...no way I'm gaining all that back if I eat whatever I want for just a week or two". Fast forward & it's back in underwear that looks like bicycle shorts.
 
@ Extra - I think I am going to do calorie counting and exercise. I am getting started on a bad foot, feeling under the weather. I don't feeling like doing anything, except for staying in bed and drinking theraflu all day.



No sugahh, WOman that is tough! Sugar and milk are a must in my coffee every morning. Do you have any tips or advice for me?
 
Hello Bouncewden,

Congratulations on starting this diary...again or first time, doesn't matter...the key is you are here and we're here to help you! When I started back on 1 June, I weighed 269 and I'm now at 209...and believe me, if I can do it so can you! I'm 51 and it's not easy, but it is so worth it! My system is simple...(I need simple!). I don't eat sweets, I don't drink soda's (not even diet drinks), I exercise every day...no matter what, and I don't eat after 6:00pm. Some days that means I don't get dinner because I get home from work late...that's just the way it is. I eat a big breakfast (as you can see if you look at my posts in this forum) and a late lunch (that I bring from home). For me, just "diet" alone wouldn't get it...it took exercise. I started exercise slowly, and have worked my way up to 1 hour every day and more on the weekends. Also, I only weigh in on the 1st of the month and I track my progress on a simple excel spreadsheet. Sometimes I really want to weigh in more often, because I think I've made progress, but then there are other times when I know that I've retained water or eaten too much (like the last 2 weeks when I was on business trips)...so I plug along and watch my pants get looser rather than tighter and I'm happy.


So, figure out a plan for yourself and stick to it...don't be too tough on yourself...you've got to start loving yourself..just the way you are...I've found that my body/brain responds much better to positive encouragement and action than it does negative/guilt ridden beating myself up! I'm betting yours will too!


Hope this helps and we'll be here for you!

Sarah
 
@ scbibhouse - Thanks, 209, congratulations. How were you able to stick to the diet? I lose 5 pounds and feel like I can binge the next week. Sarah, how long did it take you to make working out a habit? Sixty pounds in less than 6 months is fantastic :hurray:.
 
7. Why do you think that you now have a weight problem?

- I enjoy eating, and have always felt like it's not that big of a deal. Compared to any other addiction, food seems to be low on the totem pole. Drug, alcohol, or sex are real addictions; that is how I used to feel about it, I've changed since.

8. What lifestyle changes do you think would help you lose weight?

- I know I need to stop rewarding myself with food when the number on the scale drops.

9. Have you lost weight in the past? If so, what has worked in the past to help you lose weight?

- Calorie counting and a lot of cardio.

10. Why do you believe that you did not lose weight or you gained the weight back?

- I got depressed after graduation. I felt like everyone was moving on, doing great things and I was stuck in a rut.

11. What, if anything, has not worked for you in the past in helping you to lose weight? Why do you think it did not work?

- Trying to lose weight extremely fast has not worked for me.

12. Would you try writing down all food and drink consumed for a given period of time?

- I need to do this.

13. Do you cook at home often? If so, what do you cook?

- It's easier to make breakfast and lunch. Approximately 80% of the time the stuff is delicious. I can cook many things, the most versatile food is chicken. Quesadillas are easy, I eat a lot of them.

14. How often do you go out to eat? Where do you go?

- At least 4x/wk. Usually Pollo Loco, Jack in the Box, or Subway. My biggest problem is portion control.

15. What are your three favorite foods?

- Frappes (idk if that would count), Chicken, Pizza, and Tacos

16. What are your three favorite restaurants?

- Pollo Loco, George's Greek Restaurant, and In & Out

17. What are three things you can do differently when it comes to food?

- I should stop using it as a reward. I can't think of two other reasons right now.

18. If you woke up tomorrow and your body was exactly the way you want it, what would be different?

- I would have perky boobs and thinner all around.

19. Do you eat when you are not hungry?

- Yes.

20. Do you binge eat (large amounts at a time)?

- Yes, that is my biggest problem

21. Do you hide your food or eat in secret?

-No, my family and friends know I eat a lot and have no shame.

22. Do you eat when you are sad, nervous, or depressed?

- I definitely eat when I am sad .

23. Do you eat as a reward?

- LOL, well, yes.

24. Do you eat while watching TV or using the computer?

- Yes.

25. What do you normally eat for a meal?

- Chicken, rice, corn, beans, cheese.

26. What type of snacks do you eat?

- My snacks usually consist of smaller portions of my regular meals.

27. In terms of exercise, what, if anything, are you currently doing?

- Walking the dog, at a comfortable rate. I know I need to exercise at a challenging rate.

28. Where do you go for exercise? A local public gym? School/work gym? Home?

- Usually the gym (I hardly go although it is less than a mile away and my renewal rate is $100 for the whole year). I am excited about my xbox as an entertaining alternative

29. What, if anything, are your three favorite types of exercise?

- Crosstrainer ramp, Stairmaster, and now the dance central. I do enjoy spinning and pilates.

30. What is your daily/weekly/monthly/yearly motivation to move towards your goals?

- Being comfortable in my own skin/become a little more outgoing/fit into cuter clothes/change my current lifestyle

31. Do you have rewards for certain goals?

- Not yet
 
Hey Bouncewden,

Good to see you're sticking with it! I'm not sure how to answer the "how to stick to the diet" question...other than I just made a decision that this weight loss is a journey, not an event. I also don't "celebrate" using food (that's part of my problem, so I find it best to stay away from that type of reward system...I tend to go more for retail therapy (like a new pair of pants or blouse etc!!). The exercise habit is just that...a habit. I guess it took me about 2 weeks to make it part of my routine..to get up at 5:00am and go hit the fitness center took a little while, but I just set up the alarm on my cellphone for every day and even when I'm tired, I force myself to do it. Now, I actually enjoy it and get fired up by looking at the number of calories burned and set a target for myself to do a minimum each day (my limit is 800) and most days I'll surpass that (which always make me feel good).

Hope that helps and stay with it..it's so worth it!
 
Originally Posted by Bouncewden

So here is the goal:

1.) Get down to a size 8....maybe a 6 by this time next year.

2.) Put my finance degree to use or work toward my goal of owning a business by the age of 32 (I am 28 now)

3.) Be the best me ever!!
Click to expand...


Bouncewden


I just want to say well done you for trying again!

I am not sure if you remember but you asked me a few questions on here a few months ago?... I did reply (just incase you did not see it haha)


Anywho...

I have been where you are at now, in fact I started at 245lbs and it has taken me a year to get to 152lbs, so your goal is not unrealistic, but I will say that I would try not to focus to much on being a certain weight by a certain date(ooh I'm rhyming haha) but try and focus on each day, If you are eating healthily and exercising, the weight will eventually come off.


I know it is easier said than done, but I have been there and I just know that once you have gotten past those first few months that you will see major changes and you will get to 155lbs.

Always remember that if you have a day when you ate unhealthily or didn't work out, just think"tomorrow's another day" and don't punish yourself too much.

I look forward to seeing your progress and feel free to ask me anything you like :biggrin:


-Minimee
 
Hi *waves like a 3 year old*


Just have to say, you had me at hello...

just kidding, but you have a great sense of humor and I loved reading your diary so far. Keep up the good work and keep posting because I don't have much of a life so reading these diaries is my entertainment and motivation.
 
Hey Bouncewden,

We're here for you...but we can't do it for you. You are worth the effort...so don't let go of it. Take it one day at a time...sometimes one minute at a time and do the "next right thing"...you can't live your life a month at a time...we live it one day at a time..sometimes in smaller time segments depending on events in our lives...so make that decision today to eat well and exercise...even if you have to tell yourself, "OK, just do it today, and tomorrow, I'll give myself a break"..then when tomorrow comes, tell yourself the same thing...and just keep living today.


I know it sounds so easy on paper...but it really is all about making the right choices every minute of the day...not every month or year!


Hope this helps,


Sarah
 
Originally Posted by Bouncewden



Minimee

Thanks for the support, and congratulations on your major weight-loss, you are so close to losing 100lbs!! What’s your goal weight?
Click to expand...

You have my full support, I really want you to do this and I believe that you can...But you have to believe that you can
smile.gif


If you get chance then go onto my Before&Inbetweens, I want you to see the questions you asked me and my reply to you, I honestly think it will help.

I may seem like I am getting on at you but I know how much you must want this, as you keep coming back and trying again & again and I applaud you for that :biggrin:


Good luck, keep us updated.


-Minimee


Originally Posted by scbibhouse

even if you have to tell yourself, "OK, just do it today, and tomorrow, I'll give myself a break"..then when tomorrow comes, tell yourself the same thing...and just keep living today.



Sarah
Click to expand...


Sarah has said it just how it is, living for today is the best way to look at anything, not just losing weight but life in general.

We can not live for Yesterday or Tomorrow but only for today!


Great post from you Sarah *ThumbsUp* from me haha!

-Minimee
 
I had never heard of apartment therapy until today. And I don't think I'll be visiting any other site or doing any work today. kthanxbye.
 
I am about to turn 30 in two months, I keep tweezing out my gray hair (I counted 23), the scale reads 252. I am not devastated or sad about my weight gain, maybe a little sad I am getting older, I tend to be a bit overdramatic about aging. I see wrinkles here and there and my child bearing years slipping away.

In November I had some bloodwork done and it turned out I was pre-diabetic, tears definitely streamed down my face. You see I thought I was a healthy fat person. The only thing that changed was I incorporated more vegetables into my diet. So here I stand once again obese, but not sad, depressed, or mad at myself. If Danni from TBL can lose 121 pounds then so can I, our weight are similar after all.

The goal this time as of March 20th 2013.
Go from a size 18 to a 16 as soon as possible
Take my measurements and post them
Log my eating habits
Gym tomorrow (gym 5 times a week)
Be consistent with my eating, sleeping, and workout habits
Post on my diary more frequently

I would say until tomorrow, but since it is 3:30 in the AM, I will say until later today my lovelies.
 
Last edited:
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top