I am starting to think maybe part of my grief thing has been to eat too..I mean 2 years ago i was twenty pounds lighter...my dtr died in april 2007...I am just now coming to terms with some things and feel anger that i was not able to process before. Sometimes people tell you to feel what you feel but they also want to tell you HOW to feel or not to feel...whenever I have expressed anger toward the driver, people want me to sympathize with her......I am pissed man..especially since she is driving again, and seems to be going out and having a good time...I mean it has been a year and a few months since her sentence and I said I had forgiveness but really..for real...do I ..yes..but I am still pissed off...also I recently did a talk at a church and I didnt specifically use her as the example but damnit why should my dtr be the example...i am mad at myself now for two things..the drinking and driving PSA where my dtr and her friends talk and my dtr's name is basically in there...and then me going and talking at the church..why did i or should I put my dtr out there as the example...so now I wish I would have never done it...it probably doesnt help anyway.....
so maybe the last 2 years that i have ballooned up 20 pounds, has partly been because I am eating my feelings away..and drinking them too...too much booze...thats gotta stop