(Re)new Journey

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Thank you, Cate! I will be sure to let you know when I see the 130s so we can celebrate together. It is so great to have you in my corner... even if you are on the other side of the world!

And thank you, LaMaria! Losing weight and adopting a healthy lifestyle has been quite challenging but I am trying to focus on all the positives, leaving behind the negatives as much as possible. I think this diary has played such an important role in my success so far so I'm glad to have made some friends along the way. I love having somewhere to write down all of my thoughts and if people actually read it, that's just an added bonus for me!

Yesterday I did the pump class and then step. My friend joined me and she did really well. Today after work I saw some clouds coming in so I laced up my sneakers to run before it started raining. Well, the rain came much quicker than I was expecting so I got caught in it. I wouldn't have minded if it weren't for my iPhone and expensive fitbit that were being exposed to the rain. I managed to do a 5K and I'm pretty sure it was my best time yet. I'm not positive because the rain caused me to accidentally hit 'end' on my fitbit and then I ended up pausing it again after that. The first 2.5 miles I averaged a pace of 10:38 per mile, which I am happy with. I wanted to get a solid time today so that I could come up with a goal for my 5K race on Sunday. I think I am going to say that I'd like to average less than 11 minute miles so I am aiming to finish the race in less than 33 minutes. I'm slightly nervous about being on a new course and having people run near me. But I am excited, nonetheless!

In just a little bit, I am going to be hitting the road to New York to visit my friend. I will be there until Sunday afternoon. I am actually thinking that this weekend away will be good for me in terms of my healthiness. I think a few days away from my scale and normal routine will be beneficial. It would be great if I came back on Sunday being in the 130s on the scale. That would be the icing on the cake. I think we will be quite active and my friend also knows I am trying to eat healthy. Looking forward to a nice weekend!

I am bringing my computer with me so I am sure I will be hopping on to check in. Have a great weekend everyone!
 
*sigh* New York. I hope I get back there one day. Such an exciting city! Enjoy your w/e kakes. All the best in the 5k & c'mon the 130's :D
 
Just checking in while I have a few minutes. It has been a great weekend here so far. I am really enjoying myself. The challenge, however, is not having my normal routine and not having freedom to do as I please. At home, I don't have any kids or huge responsibilities at the moment (except work), so I can pretty much do as I please. When you are visiting someone else, you generally have to go along with their plan, more or less. My friend is awesome, don't get me wrong. I just am very independent and like things just so. It has been a little challenging for me these past few days, mostly with my eating. I will explain:

Thursday I brought pineapple and grapes with me for the 3 hour drive so that I would't be tempted to stop and buy junk. Worked well. When I arrived (8pm or so), my friend made me a turkey burger and put out some snacks (veggies and dip, chips and salsa). She meant well but I wouldn't have eaten that late if I were at home. Friday morning she made hardboiled eggs and set out fruit since she knows that's what I eat for breakfast usually. We ate out for lunch and I had a grilled chicken sandwich and a few french fries. I wish I had asked the waiter to substitute a salad instead of the fries. I did eat the chicken on a roll but I only ate half. No condiments or anything on it. For dinner, my friend and I made shrimp, green beans, corn on the cob, and salad (just lettuce and cucumbers). I didn't eat the corn. She used butter to cook the shrimp and that made me slightly uneasy. I certainly wasn't going to say anything but I try to stay away from butter. A while later, we went out for drinks with a friend and I ordered a vodka and club soda. Of course by that time I was hungry but restaurants don't exactly have man healthy options so I figured I would just be hungry for the night. My friend ordered soft pretzels and told me that I shouldn't feel tempted to eat any. Easier said than done, at that point anyway. I ended up only eating half of one, and that was enough for me. It was not filling and I could have eaten all four pretzels myself, but the half was enough to give me just a taste and take the edge off of the hunger.

Today we again had eggs and fruit for breakfast. We went to the lake and brought some snacks with us. I had the other half of my sandwich for lunch and then some fruit. Now we are going to make some dinner in a bit- teriyaki chicken and broccoli. As I'm typing this out now, I am realizing that the food I've been eating hasn't been bad. Of course the bread, half pretzel, and a few fries snuck in there, but the were in moderation. The rest of the food is fine. The hard part for me is that I am used to being able to eat every few hours and also being able to eat what I want. When I'm at someone else's house, I can't be demanding food every few hours so at each meal, I am tempted to eat more than I usually do. It is a tricky thing to navigate.

The good news is that I got some good exercise in yesterday. We went paddle boarding (standing up on a surf board- type thing while you paddle down the river). It was so fun and such a good workout. We did that for 2.5 hours and had a blast. It was also a beautiful day.

I have no idea where I am at with my weight but sometimes I feel great and then other times I feel like a whale. It will be interesting to see how much I weigh when I get home tomorrow evening. I currently feel like I have gained weight but it's been two days so I just need to relax. I need to remember how far I have come and enjoy that feeling. Like yesterday when we went paddle boarding and today when we went to the lake, I wore my bathing suit both times and did not feel nearly as self-conscious as I have in the last few summers. I was able to walk down to the water and not feel like all eyes were on me. I so desperately want to continue to lose weight and feel better about myself and I feel like sometimes these days away from home are challenges to see how dedicated I am. I think it is fairly easy to eat healthy and work out in my bubble at home, but outside of that it is HARD!

Tomorrow morning is our 5K race! Soon after that, I will head home so that I have time to get things together before work on Monday. I have a busy week ahead so it's important to me to get right back in my routine first thing when I get home. I am hoping that the scale is in the 130s when I get home, just so that can coincide with my first race. I will be disappointed if that is not the case, but then I will just fight even harder to get there.
 
Fingers crossed for the 130's. I'm sure you have done much better at your friend's than you once would have. It is hard when you are not in complete control, but sometimes we have to go with the flow. You'll have burned it off kakes & also had fun. Go you in the 5K!!
 
Well the 5K is complete and it was so fun! It was also very hot! My time was 33:22 and my friend came in just after me. My goal was under 33 minutes but I came very close! I was a tad frustrated because the announcer said the race was going to start in 5 minutes. He talked for about 2 minutes and then started counting down from 5 to start the race! I was frantically trying to get my fitbit connected to my phone (it needs it for GPS) and also start my music. Well the fitbit didn't connect properly so I couldn't use it to track my pace. It told me how long I had been running, but not my pace. That did not help. Plus the fact that my arm band that holds my phone decided to break mid-race and I ended up having to hold it most of the way. Two very annoying things that got on my nerves. Regardless, it was great and I am already itching to enter another one. I got second place in my age group and got a silver medal. I will be working on my display tonight so that I can hang it up ASAP!

I got home and weighed myself. 140.6. I am bummed that I am not in the 130s like I'd hoped to be. It is also nearly 6pm and I always weigh more at night so I'm taking comfort in the fact that I am very close. I just can't seem to get below 140 but this month has been quite busy and I keep trying to stay afloat with this weight loss. I feel like around every corner is a BBQ or a weekend away that I have to "get through" with hopes of getting back on track afterward. I suppose I am doing so much better during those outings and maintaining the weight loss. That is something to be proud of but I am getting slightly annoyed at the numbers game. This week I am going to be very diligent and work my butt off to get below 140. I desperately want to hit my original goal of 135 by August. That is a hefty goal but I think I can do it if I really buckle down and stay focused.

I have another weekend away from home in two weekends (not this one but the next). I will be away that Friday thru Monday and will be offered dining hall-type food. Needless to say, that is already on my mind. I know that salad is always offered so I think I will be eating that at most meals. I also plan on making and bringing hardboiled eggs, and also fruit, for breakfasts. I will also have to bring along healthy snacks because I can't live on three meals a day anymore. My body has gotten used to eating smaller meals more frequently, that was evident this weekend when I kept finding myself hungry shortly after each meal. It is just what my body is used to and I'm going to accommodate that, even when I am away. I'm going to try and worry about that when it gets closer, but planning is key.

For this week, it is looking like it is going to be busy. I have work Monday thru Thursday until 11:45am. After that, I have a few things going on in the afternoons that'll keep me busy. The weather is also looking beautiful for the next few days so I'm hoping that'll keep the positivity going. I haven't thought about my exercise plan for the week but I am thinking Monday- gym to do weights then cardio of some sort or walk with my friend if she can, Tuesday- run, and Wednesday- step class (maybe pump). I want to up my running game but I'm not sure if I should start to run more often or run longer distances. I guess that choice is up to me so I'll have to give it some thought.

Lastly, I posted some pictures of me on my Facebook from the run. I got several compliments from friends commenting on how happy/healthy/good I look. It is incredible what that does for one's self esteem. I feel healthier but I still have my moments when I feel like I am 40 pounds heavier again. Getting simple words of encouragement is awesome and pushes me to continue and not give up. Currently I am feeling "pudgy" and those words were just what I needed to not feel bad for myself. I am certainly not conceited or vain, but I am human and appreciate hearing that my hard word is being noticed, especially when sometimes I forget!
 
There was so much in that last post that I liked. "planning is key". "I think I can do it if I really buckle down and stay focused." ," I got several compliments from friends commenting on how happy/healthy/good I look. It is incredible what that does for one's self esteem." You will hit the 130's this week kakes. I'm sure of it :)
 
Yes! All the yes! It´s normal to not always be in complete control of what kind of food is around and you WILL start to get a feel for how much your body needs of different food stuffs. I get the fear of losing control but I think that´ll get better with time. You worked hard and achieved a lot so it´s normal to not want to lose all that.
 
So impressed with the 5k run. I would love to start jogging properly. Paddle Boarding seems like so much fun as well.
You sound like you handled being away really well. It is hard to navigate food when others are involved so well done. :)
 
Thank you Cate, LaMaria, and Florence!

Cate- 139.8 on the scale first thing this morning!

LaMa- Not having control is so difficult for me. I use the term "bubble" to describe how I am basically in my own world, doing what I need to do to feel healthy and happy. I stick to my food choices and exercise routine and it is what is giving me comfort and results. When I am unable to do that, I feel uneasy, anxious, and stressed. I am so happy to be back to my bubble, although I had a wonderful weekend. I hope you are right that I will eventually learn to be more comfortable with it!

Florence- The 5K race was so fun. Paddle boarding was awesome and I can't wait to do it again. I highly recommend it!

I am loving being back home and back to my normal routine. Had my regular breakfast this morning and now making lunch at home. I have a doctor's appointment in a little bit and I will likely be put on medication for my PCOS. I will be sure to ask the doctor about any side effects, specifically with my weight. Medication makes me slightly nervous but I know I need it.

Right after the doctor's, I'll be headed to the gym to do some weight machines and maybe a little bit of cardio. I'm not going to go crazy since my friend is coming over later to go walking. It is hot out today (90 degrees) so I'll have to be ready to sweat.

This morning, one of my coworkers told me that she saw we running last week. I secretly love when people tell me that they see me out running. I like that they see me working hard and I'm sure they are proud of me and maybe some wish they would go running too. I am happy with the choices that I am making for myself and running is a HUGE part of that!
 
Being proud of yourself, being happy with yourself is the best reward of all and I´m really glad to see you´re giving it to yourself. Good luck with your appointment!
 
Thanks LaMa. My appointment went well. The nurse (although I'm not sure if she's a nurse; she was the one who brought me to the room and took my vitals) said once again that I have the blood pressure of a runner. Totally made my day. The doctor was going over my blood work results and mentioned that she thinks that my losing weight helped with a few of the levels of my hormones. That was awesome news and just another reason why losing this weight was worth it. I still have more to lose, which I know will only help. The doctor prescribed me medication that is used often for PCOS, but is technically a medication to combat high blood pressure. She is a tad concerned that the medication will lower my already low blood pressure so that is something to keep an eye on. She assured me that the medication should not effect my weight at all.

After my appointment, I ran some errands and then headed to the gym. I did 15 minutes on the stair master and 15 minutes on the rower. It was hot so I worked up quite a sweat. Then I did my usual circuit of weight machines. As if that wasn't enough, my friend came over and we walked for and hour and 45 minutes. 5.5 miles. We even risked getting caught in a thunderstorm to walk! Today was a great day in terms of my exercise and eating. Overall a big success! Just what I needed after coming back from a weekend away.

Tomorrow I have another job interview at 12:30. I will be sure to pack a snack for mid-morning and also a lunch I can eat on the road since it's about an hour away. In my old life (aka before I started eating healthy) I would use that as a perfect excuse to stop for fast food. Not any more! I can just as easily grab the grilled chicken from my refrigerator (that I made extra tonight for that very purpose) and some fruit or veggies. When I get home, I will probably rest a bit and then eventually run during the evening. I had to order a new band to hold my phone while I run since mine broke during my race yesterday and unfortunately it won't be delivered until Wednesday. That means I will have to be creative with finding a place to put my phone while I run. Not going to let that hold me back from running. After the race I did, I am itching to get another run in and continue getting stronger as a runner.

I am off to prepare for my interview (and watch the Bachelorette :)). Have a great night everyone!
 
Hey Kakes2,

You sound like you really have the exercising thing down. Really impressed with it.
I hope your interview went well and that is was a really positive experience for you.
 
Korrie, I am very busy but I wouldn't have it any other way.
Florence, it has been a process to learn how to integrate exercise in my life. I have made it work for me and I am loving it.
Thanks, LaMa!

Today I am feeling pretty good. 139.6 on the scale this morning, which is .3 down from yesterday. I hope the scale continues to trend down because I am itching to see that 135!

My eating has been good today. Hardboiled eggs and grapes for breakfast. Carrots and grilled chicken for lunch. Blueberries and watermelon for snack. Currently drinking my second hot green tea of the day!

I am relaxing a bit this afternoon and then will go for a run tonight. The humidity has gone down a lot so it should be a good night for running. I am hoping for a good 5k run and then some walking after that.

I looked into some upcoming races and there are a few that I am interested in. The challenge is finding someone to join me. I really don't want to have to go to a race alone. That's no fun!
 
your meals sound delish! Its my dream to run a 5K, till then I"ll live it vicariously through you! lol
 
Checking in quickly while I am procrastinating getting ready for work. Yesterday I had a super busy day but managed to stay mostly on track. A friend texted me while I was at work, asking me to go to the beach. After work, I quickly ran home, ate lunch, packed some fruit, and was out the door. When I got home, I had to rush to get ready for step. It was great that a different friend was meeting me, because otherwise I would have been tempted to stay home. Then after that, I met a friend for dinner. Originally she had asked me if I wanted to get chinese food, but I politely asked if we could pick a different option. We agreed on a restaurant on the water and it was perfect. I got a turkey burger (didn't eat the bun) and a garden salad on the side. Of course I would have loved the french fries, but that wasn't happening. The only bad thing was that I had two glasses on sangria but I don't regret that at all. Totally worth it!

The scale has been at 137.5 for the past two days and I'm hoping it continues to inch its way to 135. So close!

I am thinking that tonight I might drive to a walking/bike path to go running. I really want to do a 5k on a flat surface and try and increase my time. I run around my neighborhood and beyond, but there are inclines and hills, I have to cross the street a few times, etc., which impacts my time. I will have to do some research when I get home from work to figure out the closest trail to me. I also have to time it right so that I'm not there when it's getting dark. That would be unsafe.

Today I am hoping for an easy day at work (I am done with week 3 of this 6 week job!) and then I need to get some things done around the house... laundry especially. It is a good thing when all of your favorite workout clothes are dirty though... it means you have actually been working out! :)
 
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