Happy and Healthy

So I thought this was interesting and I stole it from SaraM's Journal--I hope she doesnt mind!

What is your current height and weight?
5'7--165 lbs
If you were at an ideal weight now, what would that weight be?
120 lbs Idealisticly (realisticly 135(
At what weight would you like to be at four months from now?
150 lbs
Why do you want to lose weight?
To become more healthy, overcome mental obstacles in recovery of my E.D. and to be happier and more confident about my body :p
Do you want to lose weight for a specific life event such as wedding or reunion? If so, when is that event?
hmmm well new years eve (Dec 31) I would love to be 150 lbs, by my 21st birthday I would love to be 130 lbs (June 24)
What obstacles could get between you and your weight loss goals?
School, Time, Work, MYSELF, and my E.D.
Why do you think that you now have a weight problem?
Defitnetely because of my eating disorder, If I hadn't starved myself, then continued into bulimia and binging, I dont think my weight would have spiraled out of control.
What lifestyle changes do you think would help you lose weight?
Exercise consistently, Cutting out Diet Soda, Cutting out Fried Foods
Have you lost weight in the past? If so, what has worked in the past to help you lose weight?
Ive been up and down the past few years, ranging from 130 lbs-170 lbs, what really worked for me was meeting with my registered dietican for my E.D. therapy and doing weigh ins and meal tracking, but it made me have anxiety (the weighing in part) controlling how much I ate and keeping a food journal really worked well along with working out 5 days a week
Why do you believe that you did not lose weight or you gained the weight back?
I lose control very easily, and become unmotivated and slip back into bad habits which leads to plateauing or even worse gaining weight...
What, if anything, has not worked for you in the past in helping you to lose weight? Why do you think it did not work?
I did the south beach diet, and while it worked it was so restrictive that the weight came back afterwards, and eating disorders definetly do not work...neither do fad diets or diet pills..Ive pretty much tried everything...
Would you try writing down all food and drink consumed for a given period of time?
Yup I already do
Do you cook at home often? If so, what do you cook?
I cook at home quite a lot usually its easy things such as eggs and toast, salad, pasta, or stir frys
How often do you go out to eat? Where do you go?
probably a little too much because its summer right now so im with my boyfriend and friends but on average its around 3 times a week right now
What are your three favorite foods?
Sesame Chicken, Cinnamon Buns, Ice cream :)
What are your three favorite restaurants?
Lee ann Chin, Old Chicago, Burger King atm
What are three things you can do differently when it comes to food?
Portion control, weighing and measuring food better, cut back on high fat condiments (butter, mayo)
If you woke up tomorrow and your body was exactly the way you want it, what would be different?
My outlook on life would probably change, my confidence, and my health would ultimately be better.
Do you eat when you are not hungry?
Occasionaly I suppose out of boredom
Do you binge eat (large amounts at a time)?
Its been a really bad habit to break because of my eating disorder, but I havent had a true binge since January. But I used to Binge/Purge at the worst moments of my E.D. Probably 3 times a day...
Do you hide your food or eat in secret?
I used to
Do you eat when you are sad, nervous, or depressed?
Id like to think I dont, but its happened
Do you eat as a reward?
Only when its things like birthdays, and social dinners etc
Do you eat while watching TV or using the computer?
Too often..
What do you normally eat for a meal?
Breakfast: toast and eggs lunch: peanut butter sandwich and fruit dinner: chicken rice & veggies
What type of snacks do you eat?
I really like crackers and bread and fruit
In terms of exercise, what, if anything, are you currently doing?
I havent been doing much lately but I golf, play tennis, do yoga, elliptical, lift weights, abwork, and treadmill
Where do you go for exercise? A local public gym? School/work gym? Home?
I had a membership to a local gym, as well as my school gym, and I have an ab ball and handweights in my room at home
What, if anything, are your three favorite types of exercise?
Golf, Yoga, Aerobics
What is your daily/weekly/monthly/yearly motivation to move towards your goals?
Exercise more, drink more water and less diet soda, use more intelligent food choices
Do you have rewards for certain goals?
Not yet but Im sure id get a cute outfit once I hit a goal :)
 
Hey lady!! The new hair do is super cute! It really brightens you up and shows off those artificial blue eyes.. ha ha!!

Glad you had a nice date night with your honey!!
 
Hey lady!! The new hair do is super cute! It really brightens you up and shows off those artificial blue eyes.. ha ha!!

Glad you had a nice date night with your honey!!

Thanks MissD!


--So today was a pretty normalish day. I got up around 9, I couldnt sleep very long and then I had breakfast and showered and got dressed and such because my uncle turned 50 and we were having a birthday party for him at my aunts house.

I stayed at the party for about 2 hours, because I had to run to the mall and pick out some reading glasses and look for some new school shirts.

I got completely lost getting over to my aunts house because my dad gave me ridiculous directions and then I couldnt even call him because he left his cell phone at home :toetap05: but once I got there I had lunch and mostly hung out with my 2 cousins who are close to my age.

I picked out some black reading glasses--theyre rectangley haha I dont know how to describe them, they were kind of expensive $370, but I got $130 off because of a sale but then the lenses were $120 so I stilll paid about the same. My best friend works at macys so I went and bugged her while I wandered around lookinng for some clothes, I couldnt find much which is f ine because Im poor but I did end up getting a really cute pair of dark trouser jeans, and 4 shirts for about $102 (after discounts!) the jeans alone were origionally $78 --good deal, good deal--

Then since the mall closed early because it was sunday and I was waiting for my friend to get off work I ran over to Target to waste some time. Where I got some makeup that I needed (powder, eyeliner, and mascara) and a sweater and a pair of beige ballet flats, 2 DVDS (Across the Universe, and Romeo and Juliet) a cute clearance picture frame, and some yummy carmel corn :piggy: I had a lot of time to kill so then I just chilled in the parking lot munching on my corn waiting for my friend to get off work.

We then met for dinner and ice cream with 2 of my other friends and spent some quality time with eachother because i leave in 2 days. It was nice, since tommorow is going to be particularily hectic because I have to clean out my car, go shopping with my mom, stop at my best friends house to say good bye, go to the dentist, hang with the boyfriend, and finish packing *yikes!*

Its defintely the quiet before the storm...

Today:
Breakfast:
Bowl of fiber one
english muffin with preserves
2 pieces cantoloupe

2 pieces of cold pizza
1
bratwurst
1 piece of watermelon
1 deviled egg
baked beans
1/2 piece of angel food cake

carmel corn

chicken sandwich
Onion rings
Butterfinger blizzard


**sooo it was a pretty devestating food day, but thats what I get for being so busy and unthoughtful, stupid parties and friends lol..I blame my fatness on them haha! J/k

:grouphug:
 
It was an alright day--very busy!

Food day:
1 cinnamon rasin bagel w/cream cheese
1 banana
2 Beef Hot Dogs
3 pieces Pepperoni Pizza
40 oz water
2 diet sodas

**I was on the run all day and then went out to dinner with my bf but tommorow should be better!
 
Sooo its been way busy! I havent really had time to sit down and breathe since I am in job training and I moving in to my new apartment. But luckily things have gone well :)

I moved in on Tuesday and halled all my junk up to the 3rd floor :svengo: and got to take a peek at my new place ( I actually hadnt seen it before ) but its super nice, my room is a little small, but still its nice. I will have 3 other roomates but they have yet to move in. So im just chilling right now haha.

Work training has been really good and all the other students I work with are all really fun and I think things will be awesome :)

Me--takin my picture at work training :)
work.jpg




I did manage to go to the grocery store and pick things up but still there was a work pizza party, as well as mexican with my parents, and some alcohol last night--but all in all I feel more in control with my food so once things get regulated Im sure everything will fall into place.

Ive also been thinking about recontacting my dietician on campus so I can get back into my recovery groove and not slip back into bad habits!
:gnorsi:


For food today I have had:
1 bowl of fiber one w/banana and soy milk: 220
1 english muffin w/peanut butter: 260
Snack:
1 small piece of dark chocolate: 45
1-100 calorie pack: 100
1 propel water: 30
lunch:
2 eggies in a basket (w/low cal bread) 250
1 apple: 80
2 tbsp soy nuts: 100
1 Coke Zero: 0
snack:
fat free protein pudding 150
Dinnerish
1 bagel w/1 tbsp peanut butter: 400
1 bowl of chili w/1% cheese: 230
snack:
protein pudding 150

Total: about 2000 ish
 
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wus up chilla! Nice pic! I feel ya on the chocolate. That little square is a life saver. I like to buy really good chocolate. I need to find a place that sales really expensive chocolate because since I only eat a square every now and then I think I can afford to get the good stuff.
 
wus up chilla! Nice pic! I feel ya on the chocolate. That little square is a life saver. I like to buy really good chocolate. I need to find a place that sales really expensive chocolate because since I only eat a square every now and then I think I can afford to get the good stuff.

Thanks ed! I <3 Chocolate..I bet its one of my biggest downfalls lol. It was a free sample at this really cute organic food co-op today!
 
Suprisingly, I'm not that into chocolate... but when I get some I eat it ALL.:ack2: So, I just stay away from it.

Glad to hear you're doing so well!:hurray: I would definitely contact that dietician, just so you don't slip back from your progress.

:D

Keep up the good work, missy!
 
Hi :)

I was having a read thru your diary and i had to leave a little cmment to let you know how moved i was to read it. It must be very difficult to recover from bulimia, especially if you are trying to lose weight. You must be very strong - well done! I would def see the dietician to keep on track, its prob best to have all the support that you can!

Good luck xx
 
Hi :)

I was having a read thru your diary and i had to leave a little cmment to let you know how moved i was to read it. It must be very difficult to recover from bulimia, especially if you are trying to lose weight. You must be very strong - well done! I would def see the dietician to keep on track, its prob best to have all the support that you can!

Good luck xx

Awh--Thank you so much for your comment, its touching, really :) It has been really hard, and I dont really ever think I will be completely broken of some of my habits, but I know that I want to get married, and have children, and live a normal life someday and my weight and body image is just something that I need to get healthy for my own well being and my future. I am on prozac right now which really helps with the urges to binge and it helps me feel better about myself so I am not so focused on my weight. But every now and then its still in the back of my mind, but I do the best I can to shake it off.

Also--I did e-mail my dietician yesterday so hopefully I will see her soon :)
 
Yay for the weekend :)

Yesterday was our last day of job training, so it was pretty uneventful last night. I helped my friend moved into her new aparment and then I watched a couple movies and pretty much vegged by myself and started cleaning up my mess so my roomates arent shocked when they move in lol.

I e-mailed my dietitian last night, so that gives me motivation to eat better, before I see her. Because then I know when I do see her I will be weighing in. Im pretty sure last time I left her I was around 156-158 pounds *yikes* so I made a 5 day plan going off of my food I have right now to establish 1.200-1,300 calories a day. Also next weekend I am going up to my cabin with my parents, sister, her boyfriend, and my boyfriend because my dad would liek to teach us how to drive a speed boat. This means potenial bathing suit time soooo I need to be on my best behavior :p

I am not sure what Im going to do yet, I should go bug my friend but last time I went and knocked on her door Im pretty sure she was in the shower, so I went back to my room.

But so far today I have had:
Lunch:
1 turkey sandwich w/ 1% cheese, light mayo, honey mustard: 225
Carrots and Celery Sticks: 50
1 tbs western dressing: 35 cals
cottage cheese: 90
Fruit cup: 35 cals
snack:
1 0% greek yogurt : 60
1 scoop Protein Powder: 110
1-100 cal pack dried fruit: 100
*all mixed together it was delicious :drool5:
Dinner-
Chicken Breast: 110
Asparagus: 70
Brown rice: 170
16 oz propel: 20
1tbsp ketchup: 20
Canola oil: 50
Dessert-
1-100 cal pack chocolate chip cookies

So I am around 1,245

But on the downside, I weighed in today and was around 169 pounds. I switched over to my scale which tends to weigh me heavier, but I am not surprised...so 158 here I come..
 
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Just thought id post a picture of my beautiful chilla boys--I am currently missing them because they have yet to move into my apartment with me until next week :(

My baby Taavi:

Taaviolder.jpg


My baby Clover:

Cloveryounger.jpg



But on a different note, things went well last night, I am down abotu a half a pound this morning--and so far today I have had:


1 bowl of fiber one w/banana and soymilk: 200
30 frozen grapes: 100
1 chicken breast sandwich w/bacon (I know not that great): 450
fries: 300
2 diet cokes: 0
1 propel: 200
1 english muffin with peanut butter: 360
1/4 cup M & M's : 220
4 shots of captain Morgan: 350
2 Coke Zeros: 0
1 jello shot: 90

**not the best night, but I ended up weighing this morning and I did weigh in less than yesterday..and I technically didnt eat dinner, so its a give and take situation
 
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1 0% greek yogurt : 60
1 scoop Protein Powder: 110
1-100 cal pack dried fruit: 100
*all mixed together it was delicious

I had that same thing today. It was very good. I had vanilla yogurt though, not greek.
 
Haha wowsers-- I always thought snakes are kind of fun and cute, but I am drawn to the soft fuzzy loveliness of my chinchillas and cats haha! What are their names??

Yeah oddly they are not as terrible as the rap they get. The actually have personalities and are quite fun!! But not to cuddle up with... thats why I also have a rot/chow mix pooch.... Boomer my little boy!

That big girl is Dixi, then we have Jake, Bella, and Sapheria! Stephen my honey is into herpetology and is planning on breeding. We are getting a baby male next spring to breed with Sapheria... when they are old enough of course!
 
Yeah oddly they are not as terrible as the rap they get. The actually have personalities and are quite fun!! But not to cuddle up with... thats why I also have a rot/chow mix pooch.... Boomer my little boy!

That big girl is Dixi, then we have Jake, Bella, and Sapheria! Stephen my honey is into herpetology and is planning on breeding. We are getting a baby male next spring to breed with Sapheria... when they are old enough of course!

Awhhh cute! I am planning on breeding my boys too! Im waiting til i have enough room for them and until they get closer to age--cuz they are both just around a year old still :)
 
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