Cate's Diary

[Cate]

Oh Cate how lovely to have met some new folks you enjoy! When you 'click' with someone, it is like putting together a puzzle...everything just clicks into place and feels right! I really hope you enjoyed your birthday lunch! I was missing a front tooth for 2 weeks one time , I did get rather used to it!

Thanks, Jen. I had a lovely birthday lunch.

How is the lung recovery going ?

Slowly, Tru, slowly.

I possibly care just a little less about how others look at me as well. That is a good thing for me.
That's great!--and most of the time we are far more critical of ourselves anyways. I hope you found a good seat away from any further triggering scents!

Thanks, Liza. It was impossible to stay away from perfume & I had to say no to them coming back to our house afterwards, but without really saying why.

Yay for well-timed rain! I hope it helped for your allergies.

The rain helped a little, Llama, but I think I need to air the house out. It's just quite cold at the moment. It has got up to 1oC at 9.30 am.

Caring less about what other people think and meeting lovely new folks sound most excellent to me

It is. I'm getting better at caring less xo

That's great about the rain. It's not often I say that! Haha.

Me either. We need more though. Much more. I never say that!

I drove G in to catch a bus to golf today & will go back in to pick him up this afternoon. I might go out to the golf club beforehand & put my new seat covers on my cart & see how the rain cover fits. I'll probably need help but I'll have a crack. I also have the rear vision mirrors but I'll definitely need help with those.

 

[Llama]

I hope the perfumes didn't mess with you too much this time

 

[Emilyrose]

Hope you had fun kitting out the golf cart. Your new baby! Archie will be getting jealous.

 

[Jenefer]

I think Archie is your fur baby? I have one of those too and she loves going for a ride on a golf cart!

 

[Cate]

I hope the perfumes didn't mess with you too much this time

They did, Llama. It's all layered at the moment. Everywhere I go I am reacting strongly. My nose/system goes on hyper-alert.

Hope you had fun kitting out the golf cart. Your new baby! Archie will be getting jealous.

I didn't get out there, Em. The stuff is still in my car. I did take Arch in for both drives though & he got plenty of walks (in the cold). Lots of lap time too as I read a book.

I think Archie is your fur baby? I have one of those too and she loves going for a ride on a golf cart!

Archie is our Malteze/Shitzu/Poodle. He most probably won't get a ride on my golf cart as it will live at our local golf course, but I'm sure he would love it. I may go out today to attach the new things, but I'm feeling a bit tired & lazy I must admit so maybe not.

 

[Cate]

G & I went out to the golf course & fitted the seat covers on & my new rain cover. It just goes on over the top & will be quite easy to take on & off when I need to. The pockets in my golf bag on the back won't be readily available, but I can work around that. It is much better quality than I imagined it would be. $260 Au, instead of $1,500 is a much better price & I'm glad it's not rubbish quality.

 

[Jenefer]

Archie is our Malteze/Shitzu/Poodle. He most probably won't get a ride on my golf cart as it will live at our local golf course, but I'm sure he would love it. I may go out today to attach the new things, but I'm feeling a bit tired & lazy I must admit so maybe not.

I have a little toy poodle. of my life And it seems you did make it out there to try out your new things, I'm glad you are pleased with them! It is awesome that both you and your husband have a sport that you enjoy doing! How long have you been at it, you seem really experienced!

 

[Llama]

You, my friend, are not lazy. You were tired and struggling with the aftereffects of an allergic reaction. I'm glad the less expensive stuff fits and is of decent quality

 

[Cate]

I have a little toy poodle. of my life And it seems you did make it out there to try out your new things, I'm glad you are pleased with them! It is awesome that both you and your husband have a sport that you enjoy doing! How long have you been at it, you seem really experienced!

Thanks, Jen. I have been playing golf for 10 years, with a 2.5 yr break until recently. I can play some excellent shots, but also some woeful ones. I still love it.

You, my friend, are not lazy. You were tired and struggling with the aftereffects of an allergic reaction. I'm glad the less expensive stuff fits and is of decent quality

Thanks, Llama xo

 

[Emilyrose]

Glad you got it kitted out, Cate. Hope the week goes well.

 

[Cate]

Glad you got it kitted out, Cate. Hope the week goes well.

Thanks, Em.

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My day was very mixed yesterday & I got a call that threw me into a bit of a tizz. I'm on the waiting list to have an operation on my right foot & it was expected to be at the end of next year. The hospital rang to say they had been allocated extra funds & was I interested in having the op in Hobart. This would be in about 4-6 weeks. I am petrified of going into a hospital again, mainly because of my fragrance allergies and other health reasons. I am wondering if I should have this operation at all. The woman who rang had no record of my aneurysm & I said I would talk it over with my cardio next week & call them back on the 29th, which will give me a chance to really think it over.
I had my tooth refitted yesterday & my dentist didn't charge me. That was a bonus.

 

[Jenefer]

Thanks, Em.

---

My day was very mixed yesterday & I got a call that threw me into a bit of a tizz. I'm on the waiting list to have an operation on my right foot & it was expected to be at the end of next year. The hospital rang to say they had been allocated extra funds & was I interested in having the op in Hobart. This would be in about 4-6 weeks. I am petrified of going into a hospital again, mainly because of my fragrance allergies and other health reasons. I am wondering if I should have this operation at all. The woman who rang had no record of my aneurysm & I said I would talk it over with my cardio next week & call them back on the 29th, which will give me a chance to really think it over.
I had my tooth refitted yesterday & my dentist didn't charge me. That was a bonus.

Oh Cate, my number 1 fear in life is anything medical. That is partly why I studied what I did in school. I thought it would make me more calm about it all. Of course it did not work one bit, so I can completely understand this throwing you into a bit of a tizz. It will be good to talk to your cardio and see if this will be safe for you. That will put your mind at ease a bit. I'm glad your dental appointment went well, I am no big fan of those either! Great big hug!

 

[Llama]

What Jenefer said. Also: being in the hospital during cold weather might mean less airing out and more allergies. I once made it through several weeks in a hostel with woolen carpet by having all the windows open day and night but it would've been more pleasant if it hadn't been November

 

[Cate]

Thanks, Jen & Llama I am still freaking out. When the hospital rang I put her on speakerphone & G heard the conversation. I was asked what I weighed & had to reply & felt such shame. I have put on another 2 kg lately as I weighed myself this morning. I have been avoiding getting on the scales & I think I knew. I feel so fat. I really do.
I don't want this operation. I can manage. I need to lose weight & that will make a big difference. The thought is freaking me out.
I'm off to golf today, feeling like a big fat blimp. That is the truth.

 

[Emilyrose]

Oh no, sorry to hear that Cate. Will the operation be of benefit to you? I guess so? You are not a blimp and you're being really active and eating well, but it's annoying that the scales aren't reflecting that, for sure.

 

[Cate]

Thanks, Em. The operation would be on my right foot to correct a bunion & hammer toe. I'm going to do a lot of research in the next week & after this weekend I am on Operation Lose Weight.

 

[Jenefer]

Thanks, Jen & Llama I am still freaking out. When the hospital rang I put her on speakerphone & G heard the conversation. I was asked what I weighed & had to reply & felt such shame. I have put on another 2 kg lately as I weighed myself this morning. I have been avoiding getting on the scales & I think I knew. I feel so fat. I really do.
I don't want this operation. I can manage. I need to lose weight & that will make a big difference. The thought is freaking me out.
I'm off to golf today, feeling like a big fat blimp. That is the truth.

I know exactly how you feel Cate! It is very unpleasant to feel these things and certainly no fun to have our husbands bear witness to what we feel ashamed of We can know they love us not matter what, but for some reason that only helps so much! I think it is okay to acknowledge how you feel here (NOT that you need my permission!!!) I just mean that you can say these things and I know that I GET IT and I am sure that others do too. I hope there is some comfort in being understood in this way. Then you can continue 'walking on the path' to change with us, good days and bad days we are in this together!

 

[Cate]

Jen, thank you so much. I am more comfortable in this space than I am anywhere else. After just reading your diary, I know that you get it. There is comfort in being understood. Empathy goes a long way.
I played the whole round of golf but wanted to abandon after 3 holes. I was so out of sorts. T talked me into staying. I'm glad she did. I struggled around the course but that's not the end of the world.

 

[Llama]

I'm so sorry the phonecall upset you so. Being able to play more golf thanks to the buggy will help and you've long proven you have the dedication to lose weight - it's just a matter of sticking to your guns long enough. Which easier said than done (I'm sadly an excellent example of that...) but you can do it! And so can I.

 

[Cate]

Thank you, Llama. Thank you for your continued friendship & support