Cate's Diary

I think you are right LaMa. G is down today & has had enough too. He's says this is it for him too. He will see his year out as Captain (his 5th I think) & will also resign from the committee. Unfortunately the year does not end until next October at the next AGM. It's time he got more outspoken with them, but it is not really in his nature. He internalises problems. He is really down today. I feel better now I have made my decision. I will not be putting up with any more shit, that much I know. Thanks for your support LaMa & the hugs.
G & I are doing another tip run today & are in our working gear. We'll take our re-cycling & odds & ends from around our place & D's & then go to the golf club & load up all the re-cycling from there. Doing something physical will do us both good. We both love tidying up/de-cluttering.
I'll do my FD tomorrow as G wanted to cook me breakfast this morning & I didn't have the heart to say no. He's a nurturer!Love to all, xoxo Cate
 
Our day has been quite disastrous. G was so cranky & ended up backing the ute into & onto a fence & it took us ages to get it off & the fence is wrecked. Luckily the ute wasn't. I suggested abandoning the whole trip, but we shortened it & did not go to D's to get his stuff. We just did what we had to do & came home.
I feel like the world has gone stark raving bonkers today. Apparently B won't be amending the minutes. I don't know when G would have told me that. She had said she doesn't think she will able to until the next meeting. I don't know if I can get through until then without just quitting. I am sooo angry & soooo over it. I have 4 bloody Christmas "break-ups" to get through this week!!! I actually feel like screaming.
A half hour ago I got a text message from my 9 year old grand-daughter. Obviously her mother has bought her a phone. Apparently, it's an iphone5s. Plot loss.
I want to hibernate for a year & hopefully, by then, the world will be back on an even keel.
Love to all, grumpy & stressed-out Cate
 
I wouldn't go into hibernation in here though LaMa. Working out a strategy for coping is not easy. I got an email from B last night that had me awake for a couple of hours. It's too complicated to explain but I wish she would just shut up & fix what needs fixing, instead of doing what she's doing. I do think she has lost the plot. I'll attempt to feel sorry for her & maybe that will stop me being so angry. I think the main problem is she likes to feel in charge of everything & doesn't value anyone's opinions. She constantly needs attention & praise. I'm so sick of walking on eggshells around her. It is just not worth it.
Today is day 1 of the 4 golf club Christmas "parties". Wish me luck & some intestinal fortitude. I have woken up feeling like fasting so I am. It usually makes me feel good. I feel OK actually. Typing out my resignation letter made me feel much better. I sent my sister a copy to ask her opinion & she said it was very good, but maybe I should be specific & name her. I'm not so sure about that. My sister is usually my voice of reason. It was only a first draft.

It is a lovely Summer's day today at last. We have had quite cool weather & I'm looking forward to some warmth. It doesn't get super hot here in Tassie. The next few days are expected to be high 20's(mid 80'sF?) Nice!

 
Hm... that´s a hard one, it all depends on whether you want to have peace and quiet or if you´d rather have everyone understand exactly why you´re leaving. Have fun at the party and stay strong!
 
It is a hard one LaMa. I know I'm going to resign form the committee, but the letter will have some more work done to it. We both struggled through yesterday & were both really down. G couldn't do the presentation after his Vet's golf was REALLY down. It's getting to us both badly. He has to do way too much & very few people pitch in to help. The more you do the more you do. I mentioned to one of them that we were both struggling & the next thing he was cooking the barbecue & organising people to wash up afterwards. He gave me such a big hug before he left that it was all I could do not to burst into tears.
G was going to make me some fritters to take to the women's Christmas party today, but he really wasn't up to it & I wasn't sure if I would go. I decided to be strong & not be cowered. I have done nothing wrong & I am going to face B today & she will know that she does not have me beaten into submission. I have a very bright & cheerful top on & very jangly jewellry. Bugger her. It's not fair what she has done to me & i refuse to be miserable any more. I will deal with her.

2016 is going to be a year where we do more for ourselves & spend more time doing happy things. I have never seen G as determined to he is now to ease out of the club. It is time we had some fun. Playing golf without the hassle would be wonderful.

It's time to go as we have to set up the tables for our lunch. I chucked together a healthy cold meat/cheese & salad platter.
Love to all, xoxo Cate
 
Yuck!! It sounds like you both need a break at the very least. I think walking away will make life and the holidays much better. You both take care!
 
Ultimately Cate, your primary obligation is to yourself and those closest to you (which you already know). So if other folks keep getting in the way, you'll just have to tell them to deal with it.

My parents play poker at their community t least twice a week at the poker club. About two years ago my mom got roped into being president and now my dad has been roped into succeeding her. I keep telling them they need to not do this, but they feel like no one else is willing to do it and they really enjoy the club.

One of the benefits of having underdeveloped social skills is I generally don't have to worry about such conflicts. :D

Do try and take a breath from time to time and enjoy the holidays. You deserve it. :hug2:
 
You do you Cate, you and G will figure it out together. About the letter, in case you haven´t sent it yet: mentioning the weird woman would probably make it appear she´s the only reason you´re leaving, while in reality (as far as I can tell) this nasty incident is just the last straw.
 
cate said:


2016 is going to be a year where we do more for ourselves & spend more time doing happy things. I have never seen G as determined to he is now to ease out of the club. It is time we had some fun. Playing golf without the hassle would be wonderful.
Click to expand...

Hi ya Cate! :waving:

~*Best Wishes for a Fabulous Fresh Start in the New Year!*~ :party:

Have A Great Rest of the Week! :hug2:
 
You are all right you know. Our relationship & our health & family are much more important than the golf club. We have felt it was important to help keep the club going, just like your parents did Vee, but at what cost? LaMa that is a really good point. It isn't just about B. She has been the biggest problem, but is just a part of the problem. I won't be sending my letter of resignation, but will try to read it out towards the end of our next meeting. I have to make sure that the minutes from the last meeting are amended to reflect the truth. B said I said something that is the opposite of what I actually said & refuses to believe me or G. I need to spend some more time on my letter & will try to put my view across in a way that should lead to a more open & honest committee. I think that everyone on committee should have an active role. That role can just be taking the rubbish to the tip each week, or being responsible for running the chicken run, or being the handicapper, or the treasurer etc. Too few people are having to do too much work & there is too much behind the scenes gossiping & little support for one another. Taking points of others to make yourself look good is not acceptable to me. I value honesty.
Thank you my friends for showing that you care. We will deal with this. G said how lucky we are this morning & he is right. He is a lovely man & we should be enjoying our lives & we will.
Lots of love, xoxo Cate

 
I have been in very similar shoes Cate re: clubs/groups.. **SIGH** I was taken advantage of, talked about (re: gossips and lies) and then became part of a witch hunt and burned at the stake so-to-speak for trying to help a fellow member at Christmas time that had children!! :rolleyes:
Everyone was shocked and insulted on behalf of this person that I would try to secretly gather everyone to be a secret santa/helper and "expose" that their high-falutin status had hit a bumpy road.

Are you KIDDING ME?! We are talkin' about children being involved here.... Anyway... Needless to say after weeks of hateful calls/e-mails I gave them ALL a HUGE piece of my mind and left the club.. LOL

:sifone:

:grouphug: to you!
 
I had a lovely day yesterday & hardly gave the golf club much thought. Got the GK's off the bus after their last day of the school year & they & D had dinner with us. I had a fast day, but maybe went over a little. I'll do another one Sunday & maybe next Wed, to get a couple in before Christmas.
We are heading off today to do a few things so that tomorrow won't be so stresful. The barmaid can't work, we have our Christmas break-up for the club, which G organises (& I help) so we have to buy silly cheap Christmas things & do some cooking for after as we all take a plate of food to share after the golf. I will have to do the bar. Hopefully someone else will pitch in & give me a break. It is going to be HOT. The sun is fierce in Tassie, so when it's 32oC here, it's like 42 anywhere else & the UV is very high.

G quit his job yesterday. He doesn't need to work any more, but had decided to keep doing a bit of work because he quite enjoyed it. They had him working so irregularly that he felt unprepared for the occasional shift. He had not worked for 3 months! His next shift he was expected to have mastered the new oven & be able to do a cooking shift on his own. They also bought a $24,000 fancy oven that he attempted to learn to use yesterday, but just decided it was not worth the hassle. He has always come home from work exhausted & uninterested in cooking, so I'm quite happy that he has quit.

Time to get moving. I'm fairly pretty good now that my mind is made up about the club. Unfortunately it will take a huge dust-up for G to also quit before next October, so he'll have to go to the meetings on his own until then. I'll still help him at home of course. I only did it to help him in the first place.
Anyhow, love to all, xoxo Cate
 
Whoa. Catching up has been stressful for me! I can't believe B and all the GC drama! But I'm happy you are content with your decision to walk away, it is too much stress for you and having your good name tread on makes me furious!! I want to book a flight down under and slap a bitch. And give you a huge hug. Give G a pat on the back for me, he is a strong fella to put up with that and keep on keeping on. I've been absent lately but I've been thinking about you a lot.
 
KP, honey, I think I love you! It has been far from fair, but I will deal with it. Resigning from committee will feel like a relief I think. I know making that decision has made me feel much better. This woman wants to feel that she is running the show. G is indeed a very strong & very loyal man. He is not a quitter & neither am I. I will stay on as bar manager if the committee want me to. They would be mad to not have me, considering I work for nothing & am good at it. G is committed to being Captain of the club until next October & does not want to let the club down by resigning at this stage. He has already done most of the organising for the entire 2016 calendar. He has organised all the sponsor days etc for the whole year. We will be going away more often & not only on non-golf days & he will be asking others to step up when he's away & we won't be offering to do anything extra. If all of this had not happened he most probably would have stayed on Committee indefinitely. They are losing out. It's time the culture changed, but it's also time we spent more time doing things we enjoy & that is what we plan on doing in 2016. Just being able to go out there & play golf, without any stress would be wonderful!

It's lovely to think that you think of me. That is very sweet. I am so happy that you have found a new love & I hope it works out for you sweetie. I love my WLF friends & the support we give one another is worth more than anything.
Lots of love, xoxo Cate
 
I´m so glad to hear you´re feeling better! You´re going to work more than enough even without the committee ;) Getting other people to step up during the next 10 months may even prepare them for the year after that so yay you and G! Also: I like that the both of you are planning to enjoy yourself and travel more, you certainly deserve it.
 
Thank you sweetie. I just have to be strong & not waver. We have been preparing for the day that G steps down as Captain & have put together a Captain's book, with detailed explanations for everything. When he tried stepping down last time I don't think the guy even glanced at it & lost it at one stage. He hardly did anything & quit after a short time & G stepped back up. It's not happening this time. He won't be offering to be vice-captain or any other position as he won't even be on committee..........I don't think I will get sick of saying that :)
It is going to be HOT today & we are playing golf at 12 so that we come in & have our Christmas break-up dinner at 5pm. :eek: I can decide not to play as someone is looking for a partner. I'll see how I feel at 11.30. I may take a book.......
 
Whoops. Looks like I forgot to post anything yesterday. I played golf on Saturday -it was HOT! I did the bar afterwards for the Christmas break-up & it was appreciated & I enjoyed it (B wasn't there, which helped).G & I were runners-up in Div 2. It was actually a fun & light-hearted day. We left home at 10.30am & got back home at 7.45pm.
We are off to Devonport today as my new orthotics are ready. I remain unconvinced that they work at all.

I am not mentally ready for Christmas. Stress levels just seem to rise as a norm coming up to Christmas...
Better scoot, xoxo Cate
 
Yay for lighthearted fun! Much better than rising stress levels, who needs those? My view of orthotics is that if you don´t see/feel the difference, they´re probably not doing much. But maybe that´s because I´m used to people who really, really needed them so the difference was very pronounced. Have fun today :)
 
We did have fun today LaMa & stress levels are down! Did our last minute very important Christmas shopping- lots of wine( especially bubbly), Tiger prawns, Atlantic salmon, fresh cherries & an assortment of good cheese, olives, a ham....I think that's it!
I now know how R is getting to the big family Christmas lunch(hitching, dressed as Santa) & G & I will go in after lunch, catch up with the family & then bring him home for our Christmas night family dinner. There will be the 2 of us, our 2 sons & our 3 grandkids for the night & hopefully the next day. G & I decided that we will drive R back to Hobart on the Sunday morning. I would prefer to stay 1 night, but G says we'll do it in a day. We'll see.
I'm now looking forward to Christmas!
I have been fine tuning my resignation from committee letter & may ask for help. I'm not showing G as .....I'm not sure why not. I think I am entitled to say my piece, but he is more of a keep it to yourself & suffer angst person & I am more a f*#¥ it person. We're a good balance.
This is hard on my phone. I'm a bit cramped up still from Saturday's golf in the heat I think.
Love you guys, xoC


[emoji258] Cate (via Tapatalk)
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top