Cate's Diary

Totally agree with your new sig - and with women not doing what they´re socialized to do. Let´s just ignore subtext, say what we mean an do what we want; life will be so much easier! I´ve never been able to figure out women who conform to everything women are supposed to do...
 
LaMaria said:
Totally agree with your new sig - and with women not doing what they´re socialized to do. Let´s just ignore subtext, say what we mean an do what we want; life will be so much easier! I´ve never been able to figure out women who conform to everything women are supposed to do...
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Hi LaMa-I know that I am feisty & strong-minded & I don't want to be any different, in that respect. You are who you are & when you try to change, you are not being authentic to yourself. Trying to blend in & not speak out just goes against the grain for me. I love honesty. I love knowing where I stand with people. I am OK & if someone does not like who I am that's OK too.

Oaks- I forget about the differences in our language. An Esky is- "Esky is an Australian brand of portable coolers. The term "esky" is also commonly used in Australia to generically refer to portable coolers or ice boxes and is part of the Australian vernacular, in place of words like "cooler" or "cooler box" and the New Zealand "chilly bin".
I opened up the bar, stocked up the fridges & then put 3 Eskies outside- 1 with soft drink("soda" in the US), 1 with "grog" (alcohol) & another with sandwiches. I put them out the back, in the shade(with ice bricks inside) where players go past after 9 holes, they take what they want & write down what they take & then pay me when they come in at the end of the game. It's an honours system & it works well at our club.

I visited Mum, did some shopping & then went back on watched a lot of the golf(club championships). It was a lovely day actually. I really enjoyed it. People were pleasant & appreciative. You don't mind putting in the time & effort if people appreciate it.
Back out there tomorrow. I have a fairly crazily busy week coming up, but after that life SHOULD settle.
 
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One thing I am trying to change is not to talk so much. I am such a chatterbox! I talk to anyone & everyone. I probably drive quiet people crazy. :blush5: It's hard. I get excited & I am very friendly. If I see someone who looks lost I ask if they need help.If someone I know looks sad I ask if they're OK etc.
Time to scoot (again) xoxo Cate
 
Lol at the driving quiet people crazy. Last night at the sauna I think me and my friend Abby drove a guy out of the hotbox. We were just chatting like we always do, talking about our dresses for the ball and what kind of shoes we needed to order STAT to get here in time and he up and left all huffy like. Don't go to a public facility if you want quiet!! HA!!
 
I have had a bad experience today & am feeling really hurt. I have read most diaries, but def. my special friend's diaries & will reply when I'm not feeling quite so sensitive & touchy. I tried typing a precis of what happened, but I could not even try. The CRAZY woman at the golf club went ballistic at me, over a packet of F'ing biscuits, that I bought, out of my own money, to repay someone who would not let me "shout" him a drink even for giving me tomato plants. She_went_F'ING_Ballistic!
When I feel calm about this I will attempt to tell you what actually happened.
Tomorrow is my lovely husband's 66th birthday. YES- 66! He is such a cutey. I am such a lucky woman. We now have to go into Launceston to sign contracts for something that has been very stressful, but may end up being a really good thing. It is very complicated, but I will explain it to KP & LaMa in particular if it goes ahead. I refuse to put up with shit & I will continue to be true to what I believe. Bloody oath, life tests you.
Love to all, xoxo Cate
 
I´m so sorry to hear that sweets, some people should learn when to stay home (and do it instead of dumping their anxiety/frustration/all the feels) on someone who doesn´t have anything to do with them. Congratulations to G, plenty of hugs and I hope calmer times are ahead!
 
Gosh that lady sounds crazy.... Try not to let it put too much of a damper on the day. Happy birthday to your G, you've got a good strong person to come home to/with after dealing with the crazy and that's so important!
 
Thanks LaMa, Butterfly & Oaks :grouphug: We got a call from a friend who heard it all & said "She has to go!" This woman is his wife's sister. She is a heart attack, waiting to happen. His DIL & her 2 daughters also witnessed it & she sent me messages of support last night, on her birthday, along with another lovely friend :beating: She also said after it all to me "Welcome to my world" as apparently they have borne the brunt of her irrational rage on many an occasion. I'll be expecting an apology, but I won't hold my breath waiting for it. G says it won't happen as she will never admit she's in the wrong.

Unfortunately I can't avoid her as she is also secretary of the Vets & will be there tomorrow & also will be playing on Wednesday when we have our final of the women's club championships. Send me some strength please! I was so upset last night. I did manage to go tell her that she was being totally unreasonable & out of order, rather than crying & cringing after being yelled at & abused. I won't be taking any backward steps. If she apologises that will be different.

On another, much brighter note, my lovely husband turned 66 today. I told him I'm hoping he has another 20 birthdays at least & then we would be married 60 years! :D I can't imagine my life without him. He's going away tuna fishing tomorrow for 2 nights & that will be enough.

I had better go have a look around the diaries quickly before heading into town to sign some contracts. We are meeting G's brother & sisters at the lawyers at 10am. Love to all & big thank you for your love & support, xoxo Cate
 
Yay for birthdays (which aren´t mine) and happy marriages! Also: great work standing up for yourself instead of backing off. I´m working my way though the "Captain Awkward" archives and one of the best tips so far is: "reasons are for reasonable people". With folks who behave like this woman all you can do is state your boundaries and disengage.
 
Hi Cate, it is the same oh, same oh with me. I lose and then I gain, but not much, I eat about what I want, but use portion control. My weight average is around 154 lbs. I would like to know more about your diet, are you saying, you eat what you want and use porting control through the week except for two days and those two days you count calories up to 500 calories?

Sounds like you have your hands full at the club, if your hubby has been going there to play golf since he was 9, maybe it would be better to tolerate and just do what you guys can do. That gives you something to look forward to. Thanks for inviting me back, I always love reading your site. AnnaGail
 
Happy belated birthday G!

Sorry to hear about your mistreatment. Life's too short to put up with aholes like that. May she always have loud flatulence in quiet public places.
 
:rotflmao: Quercus!

:hug2: for you Cate!

So sorry you are havin' to deal with that kind of stress and juvenile behavior!

:party: Happy Birthday to your hubby! ;)
 
Hi & thanks LaMa, AnnaGail(welcome back) Q & Stacy. I did not get much sleep last night as I have to face her today & again tomorrow. Today she'll be very hard to avoid. I went through so many scenarios last night & I must admit her apologising was not one of them. G was a bit down last night & when I asked it was he was dreading seeing her as well. I tried cheering him up & it worked ok, but I had the sleepless night!

AnnaGail- I'll talk about what I'm doing later as my weight has crept up this week for some reason(fluid retention? Too much wine? Stress?) so I don't feel much like talking about it. Unfortunately I weighed myself this morning. With 5:2 you are meant to eat to your TDEE for 5 days a week & only have 500 cals(for women, 600 for MEN) & I think I have been eating & drinking too much on my non-fast days. I have been quite stressed lately & have been drinking too much wine. Today is a "fast" day & I'm having another on Thursday. I decided to do it that way this week as G is away for a couple of days fishing.

I had better scoot. I won't be looking for any confrontation today & I hope there is none. An apology would be nice, but I doubt I'll get one. G doesn't think that B ever admits any fault. I'll just have to do the best I can to get through the day. Love to you all, xoxo Cate
 
Praying the batty lady apologizes! Do I need to come down there and kick her arse? Nobody mistreats my Cate!! Some people need a reality check.

I hear you on the eating too much, even if I'm not drinking by weight in wine I think I'm just eating too much and underestimating my calories. I need to get the food scale out and dust it off and start using it religiously.

I'm really sorry you are stressed out so much. Stress and hormones (cortisol) will make losing weight difficult. My spell checker wants to change cortisol to clitoris, it has me laughing and I hope it puts a smile on your face LMAO!!!
 
You actually did make me LOL. & I am sitting in the park in public, eating my 62 cal lunch. She needs someone to boot her up the arse KP & I am going to hold that thought for later when I see her. What a morning!When we got out there this morning there was about 20 golfers from another club, waiting for us, no B, no-one to help us & they all wanted coffee, so I did that, while G organised everything else. Their captain had given them the wrong time & they thought we were late. We got through it, but he is playing as well as organising the comp. & it will be a miracle if he plays well.
His brother is coming out to pick him up at 2.30 & there is no way the comp. will have finished. I am going to do the re-open the bar at 1.30, G will have to go, B will do afternoon tea for them & I will have to stay & pack up after they all leave. I will set a time limit of 4.30. I am not looking forward to going back. I am not going to cop any more crap though, but don't want a scene in front of visitors. She should have been there this morning. If I forget to say this all over a packet of f@$ing biscuits, that I paid for out of my own money & left in the clubhouse kitchen for anyone to help themselves to. Yep- a $4 pkt of biscuits! MAD!
Thanks KP. That laugh was REALLY good, xoxo


[emoji258] Cate (via Tapatalk)
 
Oh Cate, I am so incredibly sorry that you have to deal with this lady.........I can't imagine anyone not getting along with you, you are such a trooper and always so supportive. But seriously, it comes a point in life where the last thing we need is to be in the same environment as negative people like this woman seems to be. Do you think she will continue at the Club? If so, is there any way that you can be upfront with her about it? Like - "I will keep it polite, but besides hi and bye/good morning, good evening I want nothing to do with you, do not even approach me or you will have it!?" - when people are disrespectful with me, I make sure to let them know that they were and that I do not appreciate that kind of behavior...my parents raised me very well on how to treat others and how to be treated, and if this person doesn't get that, then you should not have to waste your time dealing with it. = (

Happy belated bday to your main squeeze...wishing him lots of health and many more happy years to come by your side!

Xoxx
 
Thank you CaliGirl. You're a sweetie. She acted like nothing had happened, so I steered well clear & survived the afternoon, without incident. It was better than a confrontation in front of 20 visitors. I will be dealing with this woman. I know that she has treated me rudely & unfairly & I cannot just let this go.
For now I will just say hello & goodbye & that will be the extent of it. In one way this has been good because she had me believing that
a) the women didn't like me.
b) she was my defender.
I'm now sure that this is not the case & I think she has been quite nasty & possibly has been jealous. I found that very hard to type as I can't imagine being jealous of me. I rang my sister when I got home today &, as I was telling her about it, it dawned on me. It so much has reminded me of school. No wonder I have steered fairly clear of female friendships for most of my life. I am not in competition with her for anything. I'll deal with her. I have to, for my sanity.
My lovely husband was so stressed today. He had to leave with a bar full of people. I told him I would be fine & to go & have a lovely trip. He really needs it. I also took his phone off him as it usually only rings for something to do with the golf club. I hope he has a great time. When he gets home we'll talk about how we are going to make our lives easier & more enjoyable.
A friend suggested me writing to the Committe about the way I was treated. I said she's on Committee- actually she's the secretary. He then said well that will make her face up to it. I can't do that. I don't want her to be humiliated. I know that she didn't give me any such thought, but I won't do that either. I won't actually forgive her unless I get an apology though. She resigned from the women's committee because she thought one of the women should have apologised to her over doubting something she said.
I'll stop talking about it as I need to chill for the rest of the day. I miss G already, but it is nice not having the tv on! I love peace & quiet.
I have only had 395 cals all day. I think I'll have some fresh mango & a kiwi fruit & go to bed early as I got very little sleep last night & I'm playing golf tomorrow.
Love to all xoxo Cate
 
Wow, this lady sounds like quite a gem and reading through the thread does remind me more of schoolyard antics. I try (sometimes very unsuccessfully) to feel sorry for people that think it's ok to go through life behaving as she does. I imagine there's a lot of negative her life and she doesn't even realize that her actions are spreading more negative feelings around and a big source of a whole lot more that come back her way.

When I am able to convince myself to feel sorry for people like her it helps me deal with them and has the added bonus of bugging them even more when they realize their negative actions and tirades aren't able to have any affect on my mood.

:grouphug:
 
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