Cate's Diary

AHeya Cupcake

I'm so sorry for being AWOL but i am back on track today and in a much better headspace.
Thank you again for the lovely comments and 'awakenings' you have put on my diary. You are such a wonderful person :)

So glad you are getting on well with the 'mfp' I find it really keeps me on track.
Well done you, on sending the text to that person. If he doesn't accept your friendship then his loss. it took a lot of gutts to do what you did, well done sweetie.

I'm so pleased that your mum is having better times now, hopefully they have got the pain control better now. Your brother sounds rather like my mum's sister!!!! She is money obsessed too, i don't get how people can be like that. My aunt is about 7 yrs younger than my mum but she has bullied mum all her life. She's always made her feel inferior and worthless. i can't believe they came from the same parents either, Linda is like my nan and mum is like my grampy was i supose, he was always a quiet, gentle push over.

MANGO!! My son, Jack, is obsessed with mango too. We bought one at the supermarket yesterday and the girl on the til was new (it was her first day) and she actually had to ask us what it was!!!!!! So funny!!

Good luck with mondays weigh in and i hope you have a lovely anniversary. Lots of love Xxxx
 
You're such a sweetie Kate. I'm in a bit of a hurry as the grandkids & my DIL are about to arrive but I only just realised I hadn't checked my diary. Silly me! The fog has lifted for me too(mental fog that is) & I'm feeling much more positive today about everything. My LH & I worked for over 6.5 hrs together last night, doing the bar(gratis) for a function at his golf club. We work really well together & I got a buzz out of it. I'm so tired today though. When I got to bed last night at 2am my whole body was aching, but my poor old feet were throbbing so much it took me almost an hour, I reckon, to get to sleep. I burnt up any calories I ate yesterday. Done lots of housework already & feel like I'm in a good place too. My BIL just rang & I almost forgot to post this! He's visiting also this afternoon with one of his clients who has serious brain injuries & is in a wheelchair. Our home is a good distance for him to take someone for a drive to the country & he & they are always welcome at our place. It will be beneficial to the GK's to have the experience.

Much love to you Kate, & hi to anyone else reading my diary, xoxo Cate
 
AHAPPY ANNIVERSARY cate! Sorry I don't have time to write a proper reply right now, but I hope you are enjoying your Moet! I like that tradition... I may just steal it :)
xxx
 
Thanks Joh. It's a lovely tradition & a great excuse for a real treat. you know what? My favourite bubbly is still Henkell Trocken Brut! I'm in a rush today too as I have a new cardio class starting in 30 mins. Had better fly! Just wanted to report that.....

I lost 1.5kg in the last week!

81.5kg!!! YAY!!!!!!!

xoxo Cate
 
A:hurray: :hurray: :hurray: YAY well done you!!!! 1.5kg is awesome!!!! So chuffed for you hun. :hurray: :hurray: :hurray: And you only have 1.5kg to reach you christmas goal!!!! You might wanna change that :)

Hope you enjoy your class :)
 
A:iagree: WOW That's so great, Cate!!! You have done so well now that you've got your motivation all kicked into gear! Congrats! And, like Kate said, WOW - only that much again and you'll be at your Chrissy goal! Incredible! :hurray:
 
:blush5::blush5::blush5: It will take me a while to get used to getting such responses after being over in the Cohen's "wilderness" but I love it!! Thank you Kate & Joh. You are such darlings!!!

It's so good to be feeling motivated again & what is making me feel so much better about it all is that I'm eating more & losing weight. I was scared to eat too much & had obviously slowed down my metabolism & now it's up & doing it's job. MFP has shown me the direct correlation between my food & exercise.

My life feels much more balanced as I am taking more time for me. My time with Mum this week has been lovely. She was affectionate yesterday & I spent a couple of hours with her. The less complicated I make things with her the better she & I both are. She likes me to sit with her in the lounge at the home & have a cuppa. She gets exhausted very easily up the street. I did an hour of cardio yesterday, some with weights & then did an hour of Tai Chi & felt really invigorated. Tai Chi was a beginners class but I really enjoyed it. It felt good to feel capable. It's so peaceful. I had lunch on my own- a beef ghoulash soup with a little herb & garlic gluten-free toast & enjoyed every morsel. I visited our YS as well & didn't get home until late afternoon. A lovely day!

Food yesterday-

Breakfast-

Yoghurt & fresh mango.

Lunch- Beef Ghoulash soup with herb & garlic gluten-free toast.

1 Fuji apple.

5 Vita wheat cracked pepper crackers(15g)

Dinner- West African Chicken with vegetables(no rice)

1 hefty glass of Merlot.

Fruit platter & 1 stick licorice.

I still had about 346 cals left, because of my exercise, which I didn't use. :biggrin:

xoxo Cate
 
Just mapped out my food for the rest of today, including one smallish glass of red wine & what we had planned for dinner, including a fruit platter & I was going to be over a bit in my calories so I hopped on my stationary bike & went for it. I now have about 37 cals left if I want. Yee hah!! xoC
 
I am feeling soooo good again. YAYYYYY.!! Back to eating really healthily & mindfully, back to exercising, not weighing myself, concentrating on NOT worrying.......off to Tai Chi today & lunch with my lovely friends & then helping my LH, by doing the bar at his golf tournament, & then same, same tonight at 8-ball, xoxoxo Cate
 
Just briefly- I was on top of the world today & my LH was stressed to the max & I thought that he might have a heart attack. Long story but I think he'll be ok. Best thing for me is that I didn't lose the plot & lose my temper & stayed calm (& didn't eat crap). I quietly talked to a few of his friends tonight at 8-ball & the pressure has eased as they have offered to share his "work"-load. Phew. He really had me both worried & really cheesed off with him at the same time. I'm still not 100% certain what it was all about. He takes on so much responsibility & none of us are super-human. I wish he wouldn't do it to himself.

It's my Mum's 87th birthday tomorrow & I'm taking her out for a drive & lunch. I have no idea what my LH is doing. He's cancelled his lunch work session, which, I think, was a bit unfair, but he wasn't going to be much use to anyone anyway. He may as well stay home, &, hopefully snap out of his funk. Wish me luck!

I have a peppermint tea calling me & then my bed,

Love to all, xoxo Cate
 
AHeya sweetie

I just wrote loads and my cat decided that my laptop was where she wanted to sit!!!!!!! Wham!!! all gone! oh well, here is the shortened version.

:hurray: :hurray: :hurray: Yay!! well done you on staying in a positive mood when your man is in a stressy one. I find that Mark always manages to drag me down with him when he is grumpy, well he use to, not so much these days. Jack, our 12 year old use to manage to put my day down the toilet if he was grumpy in the morning and i would then be grumpy all day. Now, i am so much calmer with everything and i really thing it has to do with being healthy. My mood is ALWAYS so much better now.

Hope you have a lovely day with your mum :)

Love and hugs Xxx
 
Hi Kate, I seem to be out of routine these days and forget to read my own diary or post in it! You're a darling! I usually let everyone else drag me down & it felt much better not to let it happen this time. He's a really good husband but I have had enough of his complaining about what is meant to be only a sport (golf.) As I said to him "You don't have Cancer. It's just a game! " I was quite pissed off with him, for a change. It must be a number of things surely getting on top of him but he was really bad & seemed sooky. He isn't like that.

I had a lovely day with my mum. She loved it! We went for a really big drive, right around the mountains she loves.

I'm a little stressed today as my DIL came to pick up the kids to take them to a birthday party & she was all over the show. She said she's been having psychotic episodes, has had her medication doubled, got a tattoo(visible on the top of her arm) of some random uni friend, has been spending a crazy amount of money and other crazy stuff. I haven't eaten anything I shouldn't since she left but do admit to feeling mentally strained. She has no idea if she's bringing the kids back here tonight or not. My LH was here when she arrived but didn't hear anything she said as she said it to me quietly. I asked him if, perhaps we might have the kids one night a week, every week, to help out. Our DIL just can't cope with them and our son is having them most nights or her mother comes in & helps her get them to bed. They love staying here & we don't have any problems with them. I worry that she might take her life or risk it but know that I can't live her life for her or take all her problems on board.

We have a friend here at the moment moving a fence back for me so that I can extend our garden. He won't be more than about an hour I reckon & then my LH is going back out to the golf club again & I will be able to get outside & do some work & get some exercise in the sun.

I'm feeling ok but not on top of the world. She's a worry but I am glad that our son does not live with her any more. He has cared for her for about 10 years & it took it's toll. He did well to keep most of it from us.

My LH just said he's pouring a cup of tea for me so I had better go sit with him. Much love to all, xoxoxo Cate
 
AOh, Cate, the situation with your DIL is so difficult. It's really lovely for you to offer to have the kids for one night - are there three kids?

Well done for sticking with the good food even when you are feeling mentally strained, lovely. And it's lovely that you had such a nice day with your mama!

Have you heard back from the guy you sent the card to yet?
 
AHeya sweetie

So sorry to hear about your DIL. You really have been having a run of other peoples problems. I admire your strength hun. You are such a wonderfully caring person.

I'm so chuffed you and your mum had such a lovely day. I bet the scenery near you is awesome. :)

Keep your chin up sweetie, thinking of you and sending you lots of squishy hugs :grouphug:
 
Hi Kate & Joh, We had the 3 kids for the night on Friday night & then our DIL brought the 2 littlies back last night at bed time & has just picked them up to go out to lunch with her brother & GF who are visiting from WA. We had a lovely time. She seemed calmer today thank goodness. We can't take her problems on but we can help by looking after the kids as ours is a stable & safe home. I hope that she gets on an even keel for their sake. I am learning that I can't solve everyone's problems but it isn't easy not letting it get you down. My LH & I are going to our YS's pub this afternoon to listen to some live music. That will be fun. A couple of his friends have come up from Hobart. We heard them last time they came up. She has a fantastic voice & plays the squeeze-box and is the mother of the 2 brothers we also like listening to.

Weight- I thought that 81.5 was a bit too good to be true & I weigh 82.5kg. I have been enjoying a glass or 2 of wine most days in the last week & have gone over MFP 3 days this week. That will be fixed again as of tomorrow. This week I will stay under 1200 every day- starting tomorrow, which is my official weigh-in day. 80kg by Christmas is still looking good. I will make it happen as I'm the only one who can.

Much love to Kate & Joh & hi to anyone else reading my diary, xoxo Cate
 
No wine this week!

I must put the last week behind me & get back on track 100%. The meal I ate last night was bad, bad, bad & I'm suffering from indigestion, which I rarely get. It was delicious but BAD! I felt like having vegetables so ordered the avocado chicken but I think all the veggies were fairly high carb & the sauce was rich & probably creamy. It was huge & I ate the lot & feel like a big fat pig. It's behind me now (probably literally) and I must move on!

I also drank 2 stubbies of cider & 2 glasses of mulled wine. Ouch!

I'm drinking herbal tea right now as I decided to forgo my usual one cup of coffee in the morning.

I can't believe how sluggish I feel. Enough moaning. I will be back later to report on a near perfect eating day & one that includes at least one hour of exercise. That is my commitment for this week- keeping to within 1200 cals per day plus 1 hour's exercise. I let the 1kg increase get to me. My weight was probably not really 81.5. I may need new batteries in my scales. I'm not weighing until at least Thursday.

I WILL DO THIS!!

Much love to all, xo Cate
 
aa these scales are really driving us mad arent they???get new batteries in and just change them like once a month just to be sure.

As you know wine hads a few cals in ,try to have only 1 glass and with the 1 hour exersice i think the 80 kg is really around the corner!!!


I HATE THE FEELING AFTER EATING BAD.It ruins all the satisfaction the meal gave you doesnt it?
 
They are Jess, they are! I'll change the batteries today but still not weigh until Thursday as I don't want to know what last night's meal did to me. Feeling bad is bad enough, without KNOWING I have put on weight. It sounds like denial I know but I'm even worse if I've gained weight. I'm going to make myself have a week off wine (as punishment for over-indulging.) It's just a habit & I can do without it. I was typing in your diary then while you were typing in mine xoC
 
ANO WIIIIIIIINE!

That's going to be a tough one... it was the hardest thing for me to give up. I LOVE having a glass of wine when I'm cooking dinner... and juice/tea/water etc just doesn't cut it.

Oops.

I mean: YOU GO GIRL! Wine schmine - who needs it. ;)
 
:smilielol5:Meeeee!!!!!! I LOVE my wine too!!! Got through day 1. TICK! Having wine makes me go over my cals for the day so I need to pull my head in & show a bit of self restraint. (Sounds good in theory!) "Wine schmine!!!!" Bread, rice, pasta even dark chocolate I could live without but a glass or 2 (no more) of wine at the end of the day is a whole different ball game. Diet dry ginger or diet lemonade with a squeeze of lemon can satisfy me when I'm in serious 'diet mode' but it's the mental thing with wine as much as the taste.

CATE STOP!!! Enough of the wine talk.

Still 82.5 but back on track. I won't weigh until I feel lighter.

Off to town to do a little fruit shopping & to visit my Mum. It's MANGO SEASON!!!! YUMMMM!!

xoxo Cate
 
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