A new start for Iwan

Yuck seafood! I hate it , would not be a problem for me at all. I made myself eat tuna today and that is about as fishy as i go!!:D I hope your son gets to feeling better! And have a great buffet night! Enjoy!:)
 
Wow! Everybody's posting today! lol! Thanks for the tip on the remember me botton, I was starting to think my internet service was wacky or something. I called the hotel with the buffet to see what was on the buffet tonight and there is some fried stuff, some grilled stuff and like, steamed king crab (which is 130 cals per leg), steamed peel and eat shrimp, various sushi and sashimi and stuff like that. They said we could order off the menu also, so I may do that to avoid the fat. Buffets make me anxious! I'm sure I'm not the only one though.
Mechelle, don't let anyone ever ever ever make you feel bad about not liking seafood, I know alot of fanatics who just refuse to accept someone who doesn't enjoy it. But you know what, some seafood has that particulary fishy taste that makes one want to barf. When I was pregnant with my son I couldn't even SMELL seafood without losing it.
 
Alright, concluding another week...finally. This week was my first actual 5 day work week in a long time...lol. Imagine that, workaholic having off time withdrawals.

Yesterday I binged. I had the biggest greasiest philly cheesesteak this side of Philly. It had to have been at least 700 cals if not more. Oh, and french fries. I had a moment, what can I say. And since then I've had several moments of regret, including the one where I got on the scale this morining and it said I had gained two pounds. Of course its TOM so I'm not going to cry...okay, maybe I'll cry a little bit.

Today has been an ultra low cal day...still trying to make a deficit for the week. I've had about 340 cals so far. I'm totally going to take it easy tonight on the cals too. I figure I'll try for 1000.

I got my flu shot today after watching several people come through the office with flu like symptoms. Ick! I had to wait to get my shot because when I first started working here I was sick sick sick and the provider wouldn't give me the shot when I already had a fever. Now I'm not feeling so hot but that was an expected side effect of the shot.

I have a date on saturday night that I'm not particularly looking forward to. Not because of the guy, but because I'm just so insecure. All I can think about is now I have to hang out with a very good looking guy for a couple of hours and talk and he's going to be looking at me and paying attention to me (hopefully). I just feel fat and ugly whenever I get around really attractive people and I feel like they are judging me, or critiqueing my physical appearance in their head. I hate it. Then I start thinking there is nothing interesting about me that they want to know and everything that comes out of my mouth is studdered and I hate my voice. Oh, I'm a mess. I don't know what to do. Right now I feel like calling him and canceling. I also lack any kind of date wardrobe. what the hell am I going to wear? Again, I don't know what to do!!

Ahhh, man. More calories. Co-worker just gave me some smoked salmon and I cannot refuse! its sooo goood!

I am going to now attempt to get to some other people journals!
 
bah-
put youor head real close to the monitor so i don't have to reach that far to slap some sense into you :D

you are funny and charming and intelligent and kind - what's not to like about you and why wouldn't a person want to spend time with you... it's a date - it's not a lifetime commitment :D enjoy it for what it is.. for the moment and he's the lucky one for getting to have your company for the evening :D

there is much much interesting stuff about you - just be yourself... i know that sounds trite but it's the truth -

Wear what you feel comfortable and confident in - got that sassy dominatrixy leather corset? rock on- jeans that fit just right? go for it.. wear what makes you feel good - if you feel good - you will look good (except jammies that might just send the wrong message :D

and if he tries to kiss you good night - I want details :D

have a wonderful time and seriously - just be yourself - you're pretty spcial
 
I'm with Mal! you are a great person. And I know that from a computer!:D But even though I have been married 10 yrs now I haven't forgotten how nervous a date makes you. So try to relax and enjoy!!:)
 
I was just going through my medical chart. my lowest weight since high school was 141 when I was in college and on the tennis team. after my second year in college things went a lil' down hill...lol...obviously. Man would I like to see that weight again, I remember how great my legs used to look in tennis shorts.
*this moment brought to you by an afternoon of boredom*
 
Okay, my saturday date night kinda sucked. We went out for dinner, two women walked right up to our table and had long conversations with Mr. Socialite. We didn't do much talking, in fact, because of these disruptions. One woman stood there and talked to him for a good 30 minutes. How rude. He knew I was terribly annoyed by that. I blew him off for a second date, he wanted me to "hang out" with him at his buddy's house for "the game" on sunday....no. I just couldn't see me sitting around being ignored while he watched a mind numbingly boring game with a bunch of guys. That sounds alot like eating dinner while he chats with other women.
Well, figures though. Really good looking men are just out of my league I guess. I wonder why he even asked me out?
 
you are not out of his league -he's out of yours -and good for yoou for realizing that you deserve to be treated better than that...

he asked you out because you havea great personallity and are fun to be around... to bad he's got no manners...

plenty of fish in sea ... as they say...
 
You girls are so sweet...you too Randy, but I tend not to kick at men's hangy bits...that'll get me an assault charge right quick. Mr. Socialite called me sometime after my lunch hour to see if I wanted to have lunch...errrr....no. I asked him why he wanted to see me again when he completely ignored me when we were sitting right across from eachother. "Because your different then other girls." yup, I'm different. And, I'm saying no. Find some other "different" girl to hang out with and simultaniously ignore. I must have "sucker" written on my forehead.
I have yet to eat anything today, and its 4pm. I don't know why, I had a whole day of really good food planned out and my lunch is sitting in the office fridge collecting dust right now. I didn't even eat my yogurt for breakfast. but I drank tons of water. I guess I can now eat pizza for dinner if I so choose.
 
Okay, yesterday sucked. Mr. Socialite will now be referred to as Mr. Drama Queen in any further reference. Because 1) he's a drama queen, all he needs is a freakin tiara, and 2) he's one of those guys that doesn't take no for an answer and when he doesn't get what he wants he acts like I'm the bitch.

Yesterdays in take was pathetic at best, a tablespoon, maybe, of peanut butter, a can of green beans with hot sauce and a few spoonfuls of cool whip lite. Yuck. I wanted pizza but when I got to the only pizza place in town Mr. Drama Queen was there...with another woman. go figure. Why do I even bother (and this was only like, two hours after he called and begged me to go to dinner with him, and bring my son...NO!).

Today I've decided to go for the pizza that I was craving last night. I figure since I'm not craving it (and I'm not starving) I can control my urge to eat the whole thing. Yum, can't wait!

I need to get to peoples diaries, I know, I try but in the winter our wireless is iffy, and there is somebody that keeps hacking ours and making it super slow. *shakes fist* so if you wonder why I'm not posting like a mad woman, thats why...I can't get online. *insert sad face here*
 
Oh Iwan, I'm sorry about the whole drama queen thing. How sad for him to be such a jerk.

You, on the other hand, are too good to waste any more time on him. :D
 
I'm sorry I havn't made it to anybody's diaries, I know support is important in this journey. I will trytrytry to get online tonight but please realize its not my fault. Thank you for the support you all have given me.

Today is okay, pretty uneventful. My son has bronchitis, is underweight and probably asthmatic as well, his day sure has sucked...lol...I told him this morning when he was leaving my office "sucks to be you kiddo, now go home and drink your ensure like the old lady that you are." lol. He was so offended when the doctor handed me a case of ensure and said he needed to drink two a day...because his great grandma drinks them to maintain her weight. He said "but I'm not old and tired!"
Anyways, I have to get going my shift is just about over and I no longer have a stack of files to pretend to enter into the computer...so its obvious that I'm playing...
hopefully I can get online from home tonight! I miss ya'll!
 
Wow. Seems like Mr Drama Queen lost out!! Down settle for bs, you deserve so much better!

Sorry your son is sick, I hope he feels better soon, and does he know how tasty those ensure things are and the great nutrition they provide? I know several parents whose kids need to be on those things per doctors orders, but due to the cost of them, it's hard for them to afford to purchase them. It's quite sad.

Anyway, just wanted to come by and say hi!
 
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