When Your Fat Jeans Become Your Skinny Jeans

[Laura F]

I like soda. Not as much as a lot of people. I don't NEED it. I do get a craving for the occasional Mountain Dew or (more often) Dr. Pepper. I have access to free soda all day long and haven't had one in weeks. But! The kid two seats over from me at work must drink 5 Diet Cokes a day and EVERY TIME I hear that click of a can opening I have that fleeting moment of wanting nothing more but to run to the kitchen, grab a Dr. Pepper, and sit at my desk soaking in those wonderful 23 flavors. Oh, the temptation...

 

[Laura F]

Well, after having a Reese's peanut cup after lunch, I apparently triggered my sweet tooth because I then proceeded to eat two different kinds of cake around 4:30 this afternoon. I have a love/hate relationship with company-provided meals and desserts. I would say it was small slices, but I would say only one of them was, the other one was a giant mess to cut, and looked like way too much when I got it on my plate.

And while I sit here with a tummy-ache, able to leave work but feeling like focusing on my weight loss instead, I looked up how many calories I should be eating. According to the BMI-Calculator website, I should be consuming somewhere between 2,082 and 2,346 calories to maintain my weight (depending on what level of exercise I consider my running... I would assume it is moderate, which would lead to the higher of the two options). I burn around 300-400 calories each time I run and so I think my informal 1,600 goal I had for a while is good for now... I was super motivated to think about this harder until it actually hit 5:00 (official quitting time!) and people started over-analyzing sitcoms right outside my cube. Off I go to start my weekend!

 

[Laura F]

You’ve all gone very quiet on me… makes me sad! Guess I’ll have to think of some ways to make my diary more of an interesting read! My guess is that won’t start today, haha.

This week hasn’t been the best. After the cake incident last Friday, I then proceeded to have cake every single day through yesterday. It was my boyfriend’s grandfather’s 90th birthday, so we had cake for him on Saturday, and boyfriend’s mom sent me home with (at least) half of the leftovers. Boyfriend doesn’t eat sweets. Boyfriend didn’t even have a slice on Saturday. Girlfriend therefore had a sweet treat EVERY SINGLE NIGHT. At least I used my food scale to sort of measure out serving sizes… without that, I probably would have had two nights of cake instead of four.

I also failed to go to the gym Sunday through Tuesday. I read somewhere online that “One day off is recovery; two days off is de-training.” Boy do I agree with that statement after last night. My goal was 25 mins at 6.0. On Saturday I did 20 mins at 6.0 and I wouldn’t say it was easy but I didn’t want to die. Last night I lasted one mile, and then proceeded to run/walk in 90 second increments for the next ten minutes. And sure, that’s ok, that’s getting your heart rate up, right? Well I felt like a total ogre while I was running. You know how ogres always have that lumbering walk? That’s exactly how I was running. Except that I am not an ogre. So it was not justified. Sigh. Doing 3 miles around the park with my running buddy tonight, hopefully I’m over the ogre stage for that. Tomorrow is rest day and then Saturday I am *hoping* to manage 50 minutes at 5.5. I did 45 mins at that speed last Friday, which was kind of amazing, but we’ll see how it goes!

Now that cake is all gone and I finally went to the gym again, I am hoping to get back into the swing of things. I was stressing over school Monday and Tuesday, and am expecting my TOM to begin any day now, but I got over my worst PMS day so things are looking up! I also get out of work early tomorrow, am going to a fair on Saturday, and have Monday off. That leaves plenty of time to actually do homework instead of just stressing about not having time to do it! One annoying thing, though, is that I can’t currently hear out of my left ear… I inherited waxy ears from my dad. I HATE going to the doctor, and don’t go unless I have absolutely no choice, so calling up to say “hey, I need someone to clean out my ears for me” is not my idea of good time. But I will have to suck it up because being deaf in one ear really throws off your day!

 

[Shinsplint]

Ahhh cake... One of the things I USED to enjoy. Sorry to hear about your ear, hope you get it sorted out soon. And way to go on the run.

 

[Laura F]

Off-Topic

Completely not related to weight loss, but I wanted to share my story anyway.

I thought I was going to witness a brawl a little bit ago… I went for a walk at lunch and was waiting to cross a busy street, when a jogger (with a walk sign) sprints across the street, getting in the way of a truck who was making a perfectly legal right turn on green. Truck honks at runner, runner stops in front of the truck and encourages driver to get out of his vehicle. Driver obliges, yelling ensues. A lady on my corner of the street is expressing her anger towards the runner for not looking before he crossed the street (granted she is about 20 feet away and no one is listening to her but the various bystanders, myself included). Another lady crossing the street gets involved, but she was on the other side of the yellers, so I cannot be too sure of whose side she is on. My guess is she just wanted them to stop being stupid and blocking traffic. I assume the various vehicles lined up trying to make their own perfectly legal right turns on green shared this feeling. Anyhoo, driver almost gets back into truck, then decides he’s not done. Yelling continues. Angry lady on my corner gets a little closer and continues sharing her opinion on the matter, but is still not close enough for yellers to care. Elderly tourists look both nervous and excited, trying not to be obvious but unable to leave and continue their tour of this fabulous city with such excitement before them. The Bostonians are blatantly staring, ready to whip out their nifty phones, prepared to record video if necessary but more excited to tweet about their adventure. And then runner runs on his merry little way. No brawl to witness. Driver releases traffic. Tourists cross street. Bostonions think of something else intriguing to tweet. Life goes on.

 

[xorie]

wow. Exciting. I hate it when people are stupid. The driver should have just kept going.

And dont worry about a bad week, you got back to the gym, and kept going! You're doing great, and having cake once in a while wont hurt. We have to enjoy the little things. This morning I had a couple bites of pizza, it was glorius.

You're doing great with the running. I cant keep up a speed like 5.5. I tend to run for an hour or so, going rather slow. I plod run, but I can do that forever. lol. My dad went running with me, but just ended up walking fast... lol. BUT he's 6'1, and I'm 5'5 with super short legs. lol.

 

[BikiniBound2011]

Hi Laura! Trying to catch up with everyone. I would not have the will power to resist that cake either. I don't blame you one bit for eating it every night. That's why I now refuse to take cake or dessert home from parties. I know it's hard when people insist though. My own birthday is coming up, then next month I'm going out of town again...so I have a lot of obstacles to overcome. By the way, I found your random jogger story quite entertaining!

 

[Laura F]

Ahhh cake... One of the things I USED to enjoy. Sorry to hear about your ear, hope you get it sorted out soon. And way to go on the run.

I’ll be able to hear again on Wednesday finally! It’s really driving me bonkers. And my boyfriend, for that matter. He keeps staring at me blankly while I’m speaking, and then he says “You think you’re talking, but no words are coming out.”

wow. Exciting. I hate it when people are stupid. The driver should have just kept going.
And dont worry about a bad week, you got back to the gym, and kept going! You're doing great, and having cake once in a while wont hurt. We have to enjoy the little things. This morning I had a couple bites of pizza, it was glorius.
You're doing great with the running. I cant keep up a speed like 5.5. I tend to run for an hour or so, going rather slow. I plod run, but I can do that forever. lol. My dad went running with me, but just ended up walking fast... lol. BUT he's 6'1, and I'm 5'5 with super short legs. lol.

Thanks for the encouragement! I am back on track now (mostly) and am stocked back up with skinny cow ice cream and fat free pudding, so I should be good to go. And I think plod running sounds just fine! You’re burning calories, and that’s what matters! I am constantly jogging alongside my boyfriend when he’s walking too fast for me, lol, so I feel you there.

Hi Laura! Trying to catch up with everyone. I would not have the will power to resist that cake either. I don't blame you one bit for eating it every night. That's why I now refuse to take cake or dessert home from parties. I know it's hard when people insist though. My own birthday is coming up, then next month I'm going out of town again...so I have a lot of obstacles to overcome. By the way, I found your random jogger story quite entertaining!

Welcome back! Read your posts earlier, was very jealous of that dessert. Glad you had a good time! When it came to that cake, I’m so happy I had the food scale so at least I could weigh out my servings. I need to learn how to resist taking things, but the boyfriend’s parents know I’m a sweets-eater, so it’s pretty much expected that I will take the leftovers. Next time I will freeze some of it, like I do with cookies. Glad you liked my jogger story!

Speaking of the food scale and weighing servings…. I had FINALLY gotten rid of the cake, and then I stayed at work late on Thursday to do schoolwork, and got to eat the catered dinner that the folks who were working late brought in…. and they had GIANT cookies. Of course I ate one. And then I took three more as I was leaving and proceeded to have one every day through yesterday. So to be clear, that meant cake every day for 6 days, then giant cookies every day for the next four. I was putting down 350 calories as an estimate for them, and then finally on the fourth cookie I decided to weigh it and compare it to a bakery’s nutritional information online. Now I’m estimating they were more like 500 calories each. Blah. I am SO happy they are done. I have got my skinny cow truffle bars in the freezer ready for me, and today for a snack I made myself a smoothie with soy milk, 1 banana, and one tablespoon each of light chocolate syrup and peanut butter. That’s 278 calories of healthy deliciousness.

Went to the gym on Saturday and Sunday. Saturday I did my scheduled 50 minutes at 5.5, with my usual increase in speed for the last five minutes. Yesterday the plan was the 25 minutes at 6.0 that I failed at earlier in the week. Success! More than, actually, I did 15 minutes at 6.0, 5 minutes at 6.2, and then increased my speed each of the last five minutes, resulting in my last minute being at 7.2. I was VERY happy with that!

Hopefully I can shed a few pounds fairly quickly in this coming week. I was so pumped at 152 because of how close I was to 149.9 and then I lost absolutely nothing in the next week (surprising, I know, with the unhealthy desserts every day + skipping the gym for three days). So I am still holding strong at 152 and have hidden my scale again. I have a 5K on Saturday, I will weigh myself after that!

 

[Laura F]

Oh, I forgot to write about the one thing that made me say "I want to go post on the weight loss forum right now." About a month ago I wigged out because I had a 1,000+ calorie lunch that I was not expecting to be so high. A tuna melt from Cosi, plus the free chips it comes with. Well today I was looking at the "Eat This, Not That" article of the day, which is "25 New Healthy Foods that Aren't." And what do I see under the heading of "worst tuna sandwich" but my tuna melt from Cosi. Apparently I am not the only one who has fallen into that trap!

 

[mad2lose]

Hi Laura, I've just been reading your diary. Its very inspiriing I must say. The title caught my eye, very good. Your doing so well. Keep up the good work. MMM cake is my demon, I can't even look at it without piling on the pounds and if I smell it I'm finished lol. I just have to steer clear of everything fattening at the moment because I will just lose my motiviation. I really enjoyed reading your diary and I will keep an eye on it whenever I can. Your doing so well Laura and running aswell, that must be so fantastic. I hope eventually when I lose ALOT more weight, that I might be able to do some running. I am trying at the moment, but can't run for long, before I feel i'm gonna collapse hee hee. Have a great day - Maddie

 

[Laura F]

Hi Laura, I've just been reading your diary. Its very inspiriing I must say. The title caught my eye, very good. Your doing so well. Keep up the good work. MMM cake is my demon, I can't even look at it without piling on the pounds and if I smell it I'm finished lol. I just have to steer clear of everything fattening at the moment because I will just lose my motivation. I really enjoyed reading your diary and I will keep an eye on it whenever I can. Your doing so well Laura and running aswell, that must be so fantastic. I hope eventually when I lose ALOT more weight, that I might be able to do some running. I am trying at the moment, but can't run for long, before I feel i'm gonna collapse hee hee. Have a great day - Maddie

Aww, thanks Maddie! I don't ever feel inspiring but I am glad that I am!! I have wanted to be a runner for my entire life and finally I am actually doing it.... it's the best stress-reliever I've found, and allows me to feel accomplished even if I've done nothing else productive that day. Have you heard of the Couch-to-5K program? It's what I used to get started, it's a 9 week program that starts out with jogging 60 seconds at a time and then works up to30 minutes. I am a huge advocate for this program!!!! I have an app for it on my iphone which makes it even better. Thanks for dropping by, I'll have to check out your diary, too!!

In other news, I finally had a Skinny Cow truffle bar (the chocolate one) after weeks of trying out different healthy-ish ice cream treats. It was all I could do to eat just one! I forgot how much I loved them. Sorry to all you other ice cream varieties, but I am sticking with my old favorite! AND NO MORE HUGE COOKIES! AND NO MORE CAKE! AND NO MORE BLOCKED EARS!!!

Ok, that last part was off-track a little, but I just got home from the doctor's a little bit ago and can hear out of my left ear for the first time in a week. The nurse cleaned me out and then the doctor came back in to check on me (because it hurt terribly) and when I said hi I was totally shouting at her, out of habit. And the clicking of the keyboard right now is quite loud and obnoxious.

I stayed home from work today (instead of going in for a half day in the afternoon) in hopes of getting lots of school work done. It is 12:48 pm, so I better get started, because so far I have done nothing!

 

[xorie]

I know how annoying having blocked ears can be. I have to wear earplugs when showering or swimming, because my ears dont drain well. Glad you can hear again!

Anyway, keep up the good work, I think that you're doing awesome, and I agree with Maddie, you are an inspiration.

 

[Laura F]

I know how annoying having blocked ears can be. I have to wear earplugs when showering or swimming, because my ears dont drain well. Glad you can hear again!

Anyway, keep up the good work, I think that you're doing awesome, and I agree with Maddie, you are an inspiration.

Thanks, I'm glad I can hear, too, haha. I've only had this issue once before, that stinks that you have to deal with it all the time!

I claimed I was going to start doing homework at 12:48.... it is now 3:07. I thought I would grow out of the procrastination stage but here I am, in the last semester of grad school, watching "Return to Fat Camp" on MTV instead of doing homework for any of the three classes I should be working on.

And so that I can be relevant here for a minute or two, here are my calorie totals for the past ten days. Where are the missing two days, you ask? Well sometimes I just have to skip a day. Generally I choose to skip Saturdays. 10/9 was the day I went to the fair (all I had was a sausage with peppers and onions) and then I ate out for dinner (buffalo chicken sandwich with sweet potato fries, a roll, and some baked beans) but just didn't feel like guessing what the calories would be. I got off track for a while, clearly, and just totally ignored any calorie limits I should have imposed. 10/1 through 10/6 was cake week. 10/7 was day one of the big cookies. 10/8 was a night at home by myself where I proceeded to get lonely and eat away my sadness. Don't ask me how I pulled off 10/11's calories, I was home by myself allll day but was actually being productive, guess I was so focused on finishing the paper that was due that day that I forgot about snacking.

10/1 ~ 1,762
10/3 ~ 1,848
10/4 ~ 1,908
10/5 ~ 2,217
10/6 ~ 2,075
10/7 ~ 2,034
10/8 ~ 2,240
10/10 ~ 1,659
10/11 ~ 1,048
10/12 ~ 1,519

Hopefully in ten (or twelve) days I will have lower totals to report! So far today I've eaten an egg and cheese sandwich, a Skinny Cow, 1 light string cheese, and 1.5 servings barbecue chips. 875 calories in total, and I have no idea what dinner will entail.

 

[xorie]

Thanks, I'm glad I can hear, too, haha. I've only had this issue once before, that stinks that you have to deal with it all the time!

I claimed I was going to start doing homework at 12:48.... it is now 3:07. I thought I would grow out of the procrastination stage but here I am, in the last semester of grad school, watching "Return to Fat Camp" on MTV instead of doing homework for any of the three classes I should be working on.

And so that I can be relevant here for a minute or two, here are my calorie totals for the past ten days. Where are the missing two days, you ask? Well sometimes I just have to skip a day. Generally I choose to skip Saturdays. 10/9 was the day I went to the fair (all I had was a sausage with peppers and onions) and then I ate out for dinner (buffalo chicken sandwich with sweet potato fries, a roll, and some baked beans) but just didn't feel like guessing what the calories would be. I got off track for a while, clearly, and just totally ignored any calorie limits I should have imposed. 10/1 through 10/6 was cake week. 10/7 was day one of the big cookies. 10/8 was a night at home by myself where I proceeded to get lonely and eat away my sadness. Don't ask me how I pulled off 10/11's calories, I was home by myself allll day but was actually being productive, guess I was so focused on finishing the paper that was due that day that I forgot about snacking.

10/1 ~ 1,762
10/3 ~ 1,848
10/4 ~ 1,908
10/5 ~ 2,217
10/6 ~ 2,075
10/7 ~ 2,034
10/8 ~ 2,240
10/10 ~ 1,659
10/11 ~ 1,048
10/12 ~ 1,519

Hopefully in ten (or twelve) days I will have lower totals to report! So far today I've eaten an egg and cheese sandwich, a Skinny Cow, 1 light string cheese, and 1.5 servings barbecue chips. 875 calories in total, and I have no idea what dinner will entail.

I'm sooooo bad at procrastinating... however, I'm the queen of b-s-ing papers, so I'm good. lol. And I know about how being lonely /and or bored can make you eat... I catch myself doing it all the time! Which is why now I've got a whole bunch of hobbies to keep me occupied. Today I dont have to be at work until 4, so I've been home all by myself, so I've played the piano, my violin, read a book, made 2 blankets, cleaned my room, cleaned the kitchen, and now I'm heading outside for some gardening.

Have fun with your homework!

 

[shing]

i was really crossing my fingers...if i can do wear my skinny help my guys....i know i'm on the right track here i was trying to keep updated with your post...thanks

 

[AngelWings]

You're writing style is hilarious, thanks for the story, and my sis loves Dr Pepper you even made it taste good with the 23 flavors description Haha it made me laugh

 

[Laura F]

Today is a day full of tests for me…

Test #1 – Go to the gym before work. I’ve been going in the evenings for the past couple of weeks.
Result – FAIL. I should have just gone last night as planned but I was just stinking tired. I fell asleep during an online class… boyfriend came home and I was curled up in the la-z-boy. Hopefully I was absorbing info in my sleep. I have run three times since Sunday (I count weeks as Sun-Sat) and will be running tomorrow, therefore I still got four days in…. but I was hoping not to go two days without running. And that is what happened.

Test #2 – Avoid the free bagels (It’s Friday aka fruit and bagel day!)
Result – PASS. This marks the first Friday since I started here that I voluntarily avoided bagels. I love them, but they are such a waste of calories (in my book, however I’m not judging any bagel lovers out there). Carbs carbs carbs, I can eat so much and still come in with low calories if I avoid giant chunks of bread products.

Test #3 – Avoid the desserts at lunch and only eat one slice of pizza (we get two lunches brought in each month, one on the last Friday and one around the 15th). The pizza isn’t even really that good, so that shouldn’t be a problem. Oh, but those desserts…. That chocolate dipped cranberry almond macaroon is my nemesis.
Result – TBD Update: It wasn't pizza, I forgot that's always the last Friday. Today it was calzones. I had two slices, a few bites of Caesar salad, and NO COOKIES. I have no idea how much a serving of calzone is, but two slices looked like a decent amount. I'd say they were about an inch wide, pretty tall though. I call it a PASS

Test #3 – Avoid pigging out on nachos and beers after work with some friends. I don’t go out for drinks too often so I haven’t had to exhibit self-control in this area yet. Thankfully I have a 5K at 10am and I am hoping to knock another minute off of my time (Goal – 30:55). Let that be the motivation I need!
Result - TBD

 

[xorie]

I'll send you thoughts to get through your next two tests! Be strong!!!

 

[newbie16]

I totally get your gym experience. I made the same mistake 2 months back. I would usually hit the gym after college, but that one day, I was too tired and decided to go the next morning, epic fail! But hey, that's how we learn how we work and our body works

So keep going, and good that you passed your bagel test. Ultimately it is all about how we assign those food stuff in our diary. After a point of time (read losing some weight), we cease to think of them as tasty, unavoidable food, and instead merely count the calories and are happy not eating them. I am recounting this from my past experience at losing weight, and I am hoping that it would happen to you too

 

[amsterdam1]

Wow! Just reading the first 2 lines of your diary really struck me, just because you're situation is so similar to mine. From everything, height/weight (i'm currently 154 lbs), to the snacking and the running!!!!

But yea, I'm going through your diary, and I just want to say keep it up!!!!!