The Road to Change...

Hi there CFL... I get you on the calorie obsession, it sucks to have to figure up the calories sometimes and no you shouldn't obsess over them. But you won't have to do that forever. I figure doing what I did before wasn't working because I just kept getting fatter and fatter. So I'm learning a new way to live. I try to think of this time as my training period, learning what a normal portion is and how it will impact my body and my goals.

Do what makes you comfortable - if the weigh doesn't start to come of in a few weeks, you'll know that doesn't work for you. And then you try something else.
 
Try the 5-6 meals and see how it works you just have to keep trying till you find what works best for you!
 
Thanks guys for the advice!!!!!! I will try my plan first and then see how it goes... :) This counting calories thing is really throwing me off balance and worrying me. But yeah, anyway...

So I just got back from Curves, and I was doing it super hard today, to make up for yesterday's lack of exercise... and I get done, and I head toward the door and this lady looks at me consolingly and says, "Are you all done?" and I smiled, and said, "Mmhmm." And then she says, "Awwwww, bless your heart." And I kinda just smiled and said "Have a nice workout." And I left...

But I was really offended by that. I have no idea why. It made me feel embarrassed or something. Maybe it's just being fat for so long, I kinda tend to take things to offense easily.
 
I'm sure she didn't mean anything by it, maybe you just looked tired. Hope doing the meals your way works out for you. I've heard people say that it worked pretty well for them, but that they really had to watch their portion size. Good Luck!!
 
Thanks pequin...

Yeah, I'm sure the lady didn't mean anything by it either, but it just rubbed me the wrong way. It's just one of those things I guess.

I'm still sticking to my own diet thing. I've been eating small portions throughout the day. :) So, so far so good...
 
hey cfl!

just wanted to offer up my support and congratulations on you making your first step toward a healthier lifestyle!!! i am TOTALLY with you on the calorie counting. i actually just posted about that in my post this morning after i came home from work. it's a serious pain in the neck, but think of calorie counting as not the enemy (in your case, having it make you obsess; in my case, hating having to count the darn things) but rather something that is helping you to make the change. i discovered once i started earnestly counting calories, then it became much easier for me because i became used to it. (this was a while back) it keeps you cognisant of what you are putting in your mouth because SO many times when we guess at calories, we are wayyyyy lower than what is actually the case! so don't look at them as the enemy. . . . .look at them as a way to assist you to make better food choices and thus help yourself to a healthier lifestyle.

and don't be too hard on yourself, it sounds like you are doing a GREAT job! you've made this oh so important decision to get healthy, and you can do it! you're allowed to take baby steps to get there - it's not the journey that matters, but that it was healthy and good for you and it helped you to reach your destination!

hope you had a great day today! :)
 
hi! I have the same reaction to other girls/guys at the gym when they stare at me for too long-i don't like the feeling that someone is judging me while i am trying my best to lose weight! it really pisses me off-it's like I know i'm fat, that's why i'm here, do you have to keep reminding me of it! but it sounds like you know what to do with the food department-and it's completely true--i think we all have a good idea of how much can be too much. anyways, great job so far, and good luck-i know you'll get there!
 
she was just jealous that you worked harder than she intended too...
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lol. :)

just wanted to offer up my support and congratulations on you making your first step toward a healthier lifestyle!!!
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Thank youuuu!!

i discovered once i started earnestly counting calories, then it became much easier for me because i became used to it.
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Yeah, I get that. I've decided that I'm gonna try to count my calories everyday. I think if I'm lazy about it, then that means that I'm not being 100% committed to my lifestyle change. I'm not used to doing this stuff, so I really panicked at first. But I think I just gotta teach myself about calories and learn to adapt to it.

hope you had a great day today!
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Thanks, you too. :)


hi! I have the same reaction to other girls/guys at the gym when they stare at me for too long-i don't like the feeling that someone is judging me while i am trying my best to lose weight!
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Yeah, exactly. But then again some of it could be in our head cuz we could be self conscious. It's an inner battle as well as an outer battle. Thanks for stopping by. I appreciate it. :)

Small portions is the way to go with more meals. You'll be there before you know it.
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I hope so!! Thanks. :)

*breaks out the megaphone* WOOOO CFL!
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:D Thanks.
 
So, I'm still eating whatever I want to eat, within reason. But I decided to keep track of my calories today. I think I'm gonna continue this without whining about it for now on. lol.

Breakfast:
Maple & Brown Sugar Oatmeal - 100 cal
One Large Banana - 105 cal.

Snack:
One Large Banana - 105 cal. (I like bananas :))

Lunch:
Turkey Sandwich - 150 cal.
25 Grapes - 50 cal.

Snack:
3 cups of popcorn - 105 cal.
Half of a bagel w/ peanut butter - 300 Cal.

Dinner:
An Arby's Ham & Swiss Kids Meal - 262 Cal.
Side of Salad - 170 Cal.

Snack:
1 Blueberry muffin: 180 cal
25 grapes: 50

Total Calories: 1577 Calories.

My SparkPeople.com range says I need something like... 1400-1800 cal a day, so I guess I'm in range.

Exercise: 30 minutes of Curves. I did a medium pace today, cuz my body felt tired. My abs and arms are starting to hurt a bit, which is a good sign. I'm working those muscles! :)

Tomorrow marks my 1st week!! And I'm gonna weigh myself at Curves to see how much I lost. I promised myself that I would only weigh in once a week. I have been weighing in on my unreliable scale, and it always gives me a bunch of different readings, so tomorrow should be somewhat of a surprise.

I'm excited. My first weigh in!! Yay. :)
 
Hi CFL - just wanted to stop by and say thank you for the support over in my journal. I really appreciate it. Have a super day!! Good Luck at weigh in - and happy one week anniversary!! Your are doing great!!
 
So this morning I woke up and the first thing I did was put in Richard Simmon's Sweating to the Oldies. I did that for 30 minutes, ate breakfast, etc....

Then I just got back from Curves, did a medium pace. And I stepped on the scale and I found out I lost 6lbs this week. This is my first week, yay!! It's soooo good to be out of the 300s. Even though I know that most of the 6lbs is water weight, it still feels really good.

Today has been a good day. Yay me. :)
 
Wow!! Congratulations!! 6 lb is fantastic - even if it is a little bit water. And I used to sweat to the oldies.. now I can't listen to the oldies station without thinking of Richy.
 
Thanks guys!!

So I'm seriously tired, I don't know why I'm still on the computer, I need to take my big butt to sleep already.

I feel that this weight loss thing is becoming obsessive and addicting. It's like all I think about. I'm doing work, and I'm thinking about what I'm going to eat, my water intake, my calories, what else should I do for exercise, how I'll look at my goal weight, if I should just give up, how great I'm doing, new clothes, what I should buy at the supermarket, what if I don't lose my weight, how long it will take me to get there..etc..etc..et flippin cetera.

I mean, this is only my first week!!! It's also extremely scary because I know myself too well, and with most things I feel like I become completely absorbed and addicted, and then I start getting bored with it later. I have this thirst to prove myself, to exceed, and then turn my back on it once I reach a certain point. I feel like if I get down to my first goal weight, then I'll think to myself subconsciously about how I proved to myself that I know how to lose weight, and then I'll just stop with the diet.

Ugh, I'm almost in tears here, because I know what I'm typing is real. But I DO NOT WANNA KEEP DOING THIS!!! I don't want my weight to be the one thing that's keeping me from being completely happy. I have to do this once and for all, get down to my final goal weight, and make it stay off.

Just had to vent.

I have to remember that I already lost 6lbs, so okay, that's a good start. I can do this... Just keep going.
 
changeforlife said:
I stepped on the scale and I found out I lost 6lbs this week. This is my first week, yay!! It's soooo good to be out of the 300s. Even though I know that most of the 6lbs is water weight, it still feels really good.

Today has been a good day. Yay me. :)
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Congrats!!! I loved Curves (am doing free stuff now).

Good luck to you! You can do this.
 
Hiya sweety! Just read your rant...

You and I are so similar it's scary. I am the same way and I had that exact argument with myself not 3 weeks ago. But it hit me - before, when I wasn't working on improving myself.. my thoughts were still obsessed about eating, what I should cook for supper, what I should buy at the store.. basically plotting my food intake.. only in a bad way. The only thing that has changed is the quality of my thoughts. I'm not telling myself I how fat I am or how I should be up doing something and not sitting on the couch getting fatter.. ect. I'm telling myself how great I'm doing and how much better I feel.

You have every right to feel overwhelmed, it is a LOT to take in. You are changing your life for goodness sakes! Stop for a moment, take the time you need to grieve for the old life and get back up again. You will not fall because I will not let you. I promise it will be ok.

Trust me - these feeling will all let up once this new life has become habit.
 
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