Qjay's thread

Breakfast was delicious!
Eggwhite omelette, full of bad things (600)
Hashbrowns, crisp (200)
English Muffin, buttery (200)
General principles (100) (Just to cover any potential oopses, I am rounding up)

So then I did some shopping and came home with more grapes and a delicious block of gorgonzola cheese.
So, snack:
Gorgonzola (200)
Grapes (200)

I have been stuffed for several hours now and am lethargically enjoying my slackerdom. I must do homework! *pretends to go do homework*
 
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There is nothing wrong with cornflakes and soymilk!
After all, they are good for you :D
I forgot to order the toast without butter, but I did ask about the amounts of stuff they generally use in their foods, so I am all right with that. The restaurant doesn't provide nutritional information and I wasn't able to find anything elsewhere, so that is a "best guesstimate" of the calorie guidelines.

eggwhites 50 (3 eggs)
cheese 150 (1 oz cheddar, 1/2 oz parm)
bacon 250 (6 slices, cooked, 40 or so cal/slice)
sour cream 150 (1/3 cup)
veggies negligible (Piles of tomato and onion)

Good omelette, too ;)

Total finish for the day:
Breakfast: 1100
Lunch/Snack: 400
Dinner: 300

Total 1900.

Dinner was just more grapes and some cheese. I was going to open up some specialty bread and melt a little gorgonzola into it with some Turkey and bell peppers, but the bread went moldy, and it has only been here since Friday or Saturday. :(
I was really looking forward to it, too; that bread was expensive!

I'm going hiking tomorrow! Yay4me, eh? :p
Yer jealous, I know you are...
 
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Your post has grown since I last looked at it!!

Bugger about the bread!! You are not having much luck with mould lately. Tiny space invaders.

I am not jealous of you going hiking... but only because I am an exceptionally nice person. I just wish I was going too! Have a great time. :)
 
Meh, it got cancelled. I spent the whole day waiting for a home inspection or trying to concentrate on my homework. I probably ate too much, but it was all healthyish food (no junk food), and I didn't track it very wellbut I think I got it all here:
Sandwich (400)
Cheese (100)
grapes (200)
Bean threads with some butter/veggies (500)
Grapes again (200)
Salmon salad, w/ cheese (600)

A very blah day for me, and I just seem to have gotten a lot of boring disappointments handed my general direction.

I did go work out tonight, but it was only about 20 minutes, I was just blown out by the end of it. It was a bit more energetic than I usually do, but my muscles were shaking, even though I wasn't the least bit tired.
Even now, several hours later, my muscles still don't feel right; I hope I'm not getting a damn cold.

Well, all done for now.
 
ahh dont worry qjay .. although i know how annoying it is when you make plans around the day and then it gets altered..its usually these days when my eating goes to pot :rolleyes:
hope you get to do your hike soon
 
lol, it's not the hike, it's actually graduation. I'm about to get my degree (2 weeks! :eek: ) and while I should be excited about it, I'm just... not. I know what the problem is, it's not something I like to discuss, but basically, things just suck in a depressing and very hard-to-handle way right now.

Sure, "life is gonna be great" and I have "big things" happening, yadda-yadda, how does that help me feel good? I've got massive debt (to me, it's a lot of money) no job, a lot of hoops to jump through before I finish school, and I can't sleep worth a damn right now, so I am sabotaging my ability to complete my schoolwork.

At least I didn't give in to my burger craving last night. I went out to hit the burger joint for a couple of side salads (I keep them in my fridge) and I was about halfway there when I realized that I was going to go off plan. I was craving a whopper or a bacon cheeseburger like I rarely do, and then it got even worse when I could SMELL the fast food. I pulled in and went to order my Whopper (no mayo, no bacon, no cheese, just a Whopper, it was going to be a reasonable cheat) and then the words "Two side salads with light italian dressing, please." popped out of my mouth. I had no idea how they were said, who said them, or what the hell I was thinking, but I got out of there with my salads and was able to head back home instead of to the next fast food place down the road.
My thoughts were pretty simple, "I'll just head down to Jack in the Box, I love their bacon cheeseburgers." and I went home instead. I still don't understand it, but maybe I'll go out and get something like that for lunch. I keep wanting to go eat a giant buttery popcorn at the theater, too.

Blah...
 
oh i know this fear very well...its been holding me back for a long time. first you wanna sabotage your schoolwork, then something else.. its fear of change, of something new and of success. the thing is you can probabily find a job with a degree (if i understood correctly this graduation thing). i've been there. when i gave my last exam at my university at first i was happy...then i wrote my thesis, it was accepted and then had to be defended. i almost didn't wanna go. i would lose all my benefits as student, i have no money,etc etc. and it was hard after i got my degree. i couldn't find a job for almost a year..worked as substitute teacher for several weeks. so i do understand why you're not excited. but then job came, new doors opened...i'm not holding my self back anymore :) i need some living to do hehe

...new things will appear on the horizon. maybe you'll find a good job, who knows maybe even one where you'll be able to travel. why not explore that option you mentioned about teaching?
if i misunderstood...then i apologize :D (that english language can really be confusing sometimes lol)
Lena
 
Sure, "life is gonna be great" and I have "big things" happening, yadda-yadda, how does that help me feel good? I've got massive debt (to me, it's a lot of money) no job, a lot of hoops to jump through before I finish school, and I can't sleep worth a damn right now, so I am sabotaging my ability to complete my schoolwork.
When i graduated back in the dark ages (1986) I think I was close to 75K in debt with school loans... it gets paid eventually - don't worry about how big a number it is - you will get a job, and you will get that debt paid down...

Souonds like you need some serious "me" time... take it easy for a little bit to regain your focus on school...
 
Qjay - "and then the words "Two side salads with light italian dressing, please." popped out of my mouth. I had no idea how they were said, who said them, or what the hell I was thinking, but I got out of there with my salads and was able to head back home instead of to the next fast food place down the road."

This is great. When something like that first happened to me I took it as a sign that it wasn't just the part of me I'm most aware of that was trying to get healthy - it was all of me - including the bit that had often taken over before, and done something crap.

Cravings. I don't feel like I'm the right person to make suggestions about this right now. :eek: I feel for you though. The topic's come up a bit in kezzypear's diary in the last day or two and there are some good thoughts there I think. If I get caught up in cravings again, I'm going to be thinking to myself that I can outlast them. Yes, I know - for day's or week's but I don't believe they last forever, and I do believe other things can keep getting in the way of them until they get tired of it and @#$% off. A bit like with my kids. I deal better with my boy now that I've realized I can (still) be even more unbelievably persistent than him. (Thanks to tinkerbelljones at BBBA for that thought).

I've had the blahs. Usually in the middle of swotvac before exams. I don't quite understand how your study year works for you to be getting your degree in 2 weeks and also still have homework, but I reckon you have enough faith in yourself to keep going and do what you need to despite the fact that this is a scary time. *Hugs* :)
 
Thanks all. I am just trying to find the mental capacity and willpower to get through school. It's funny, but this must be one of those times where change is scary. Normally I love to try new things, and I do regularly, but this is just rough. I guess one of my biggest issues is that I have a cosigner for my student loans, and owe them a lot of money, so it is not just my financial future that is at stake; but that of my family, as well.
I deal with day-to-day pressure very effectively (most times) but this is an exceptionally hard one to accept, because if I screw it up, I'm not the only one getting hosed.

My degree program is a 4 year degree (in the US), from a highly regarded university, and it is a Bachelor of Science in Business Administration with a concentration in Marketing. Yep, that's a mouthful.

I am finishing my classes a few days after the end of the month, possibly sooner if I take my finals earlier. There is no graduation ceremony to worry about (I'm at a branch university and the main one is a few hundred miles away) and the school doesn't spend much time screwing around. Besides which, I will REALLY need money since I am essentially broke at this time an have no more financial aid income.

Accelerated programs just work that way, they cut out a lot of the wasted time that people use to catch their balance in regular programs. It hasn't been perfect, but it has been reasonably fast.

Dangit, I can't think straight right now...

Food for the day:
Bean threads with some butter, garlic, and veggies (500)
Banana (150)
Hot cereal (250)
Almonds (350)

Still feeling cravings for "real food", too. This sucks, but I guess it could be worse. Back later.
 
I can't help you much with the financial worries, but I can give you my thoughts on cravings. What works for me is "delay not deny". In other words I do not forbid myself anything, but I do tell myself that contrary to the overwhelming feelings I am having, I do not need it right now, that I won't be rushed, and that when I have time to think about it I will plan when and how to have it. So, if I was craving a burger, or popcorn, or both, I would refuse to give in to that craving, but would look at my week and see if I could slot those foods into my plan for the week, and if I could do it in a good way.

Maybe I would plan a cinema trip with a friend, and share some popcorn with them, or invite them to watch a DVD and make the popcorn at home. For the burger, I would consider making a homemade burger, and cooking it in the oven with tomatoes, and serving it without bun, and with veg.

If I gave in immediately to my cravings, I eat in shame, alone, rushed, hot and sweaty, gulping the food down, and often continuing with more food. My way to take control of that is to eat the food I am craving in a planned way, making it as healthy as possible, preferably sharing eating it with another and getting the maximum amount of pleasure out of the food in a guilt free way. Giving in to cravings for me was never really a pleasurable act, and carrying the guilt afterwards was just so awfully dreadfully horrid.

I kind of look at it that I am sabotaging my cravings. I am wrestling my cravings out of the dark and into the light, and taking the power out of the craving and keeping it. Also, I am treating the food as food, and not abusing the food as a substance.

I don't know whether what I am saying has any resonance with you, but it might get you thinking about ways to sabotage your cravings
 
Oh, it fits right in with my general attitude toward food. I don't outright deny myself anything, but I try to limit it and to not "cave in" just because I feel like a snack. I have similar techniques that I conveniently forget about when faced with the opportunity to make a bad decision. ;)

Well, things could be worse, overall :D

Here is my food total for the day:
Food for the day:
Bean threads with some butter, garlic, and veggies (500)
Banana (150)
Hot cereal (250)
Almonds (350)
4 taquitos (600)
Chimichanga (300)
Olive oil (150 or so)
Grapes (200)

So my whole day looks like 2250 calories, which is a lot, but it could definitely be a lot worse. I am craving red meat, specifically beef, so I am going to pick up a couple of steaks tomorrow on my daily errands, in order to have some in the fridge. I do like steak, lol.

Well, I'm calling it a night, see you later!
 
2/3 me - That sounds really useful. I am collecting tips about cravings from everywhere right now! :) (I don't have any at the moment - I'm just getting ready!!)

Qjay - That looks like a great day's food. I was a bit worried you were going to stop at the almonds!

It sounds like you have already moved on from seeing yourself as a student to feeling unemployed. You're not actually though. :) Is it because you have already started a job search, or are you just thinking about your options?
 
Wishing you a very happy almost Friday... Hope it's a great day today.

it's also be Humble day -- which personally i find silly - take a moment tobrag on your accomplishments... :)
 
Hey Qjay :)

Well good for you for resisting the burger! My suggestion is to find a resturaunt that has turkey burgers or veggie burgers. I know it's not beef, but it works for me when I am craving burgers. Turkey burgers are actually really good, and if you can find a place that has whole wheat buns, it's a healthy meal.
Keep your head up, school is tough, the real-world is tough, but you are a smart guy, it's so obvious to us, and you are on your way to reaching your goals! The only thing you can do is just work through it, and take it one day at a time. Oh, and dream, that's what will keep you excited about everything :).
 
Felici - So far I'm just thinking about my options and trying to research the companies I want to go to work for, but DeVry does offer job placement services, and the stack of paperwork is obnoxiously detailed. Yes, they COULD have printed it all out from my records, except for a bit of my job history, but they didn't. So I am filling out a job application with a TON of background in it, essentially so that I can go fill out more applications.
Several pages of fine print and trying to fit my scrawl into the tiny lil boxes does not make QJ a happy guy.

Mal - SPAMMER!

Britta Bear - Thanks for the encouragement and the ideas. I'm actually not overly worried about the burger thing, I am usually okay later on. I think I really am just going to go buy a steak and grill it up; I like that sort of thing and my red meat cravings appreciate it, too.
I could live as a carnivore, seriously. I love meat, and I would be all over the Atkins diet, if it didn't make me feel lousy and sick.


Essentially, I have a lot going on in life, and it's all professional; I don't even have time to go out with my friends anymore, but I know it is all going to end in a couple of weeks, and then I'll just be sitting there trying to fill my free time with sleep and jobhunting. Things are stressful and pretty darn bleak at the moment, but I know things will get better; I just wish I could get out of the house and have a little more fun. *sigh*

My question seems to be: "If I'm so damn smart, why the hell do I feel like a moron?"

Food: Sandwich (400) I love hot sauce...
 
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:) Sometimes deskercises just aren't enough are they?

You could try this:




You're smarter than the people who made this:








I know - that just proves how dumb some people can be.


Anyhow - hang in there! :)
 
So, food for the day:
Sandwich (400)
2 big bananas (300)
Mashed potato w/ butter (500)
Curry Bean Threads w/ butter (300)

Only 1500 calories, but I feel all right. I probably missed something; I had a blood sugar crash and ate a banana to try to recover, so it immediately spiked my blood sugar and I fell asleep for a few hours.
I almost forgot: 3 smokes.
At least I got a few things done today; I am now caught up on my homework and can go to my buddy's show tomorrow night. I love watching him wrestle! :D
We're supposed to go hike a little bit tomorrow afternoon, maybe grab lunch before his show. I am looking forward to getting some exercise!
 
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