Project Rox

Hello friends!!

I'm back...and here to stay!!!!

Thanks for thinking of me and not giving up on me!


This summer has SO been stressful for me. I've had to keep up a front with my horrible soon-to-be-ex spouse while I gathered all the paperwork for the divorce and hid away money little by little. (the latter was done at the request of my lawyer!)


With all four of my kids home for the summer and lots of houseguests from all over the world, I was SO busy and stressed that I could hardly see straight. And there was the added stress of maintaining my weight.


Maintaining is damn hard work. The "glamour" of losing is over and now there's the long hard slog of keeping myself in check.

But I'm doing it and I'm darn proud of myself. I can hardly believe that I'm not stress-eating!! And i've really been working out hard....


As for my "adventures"- I haven't been to the swingers club for the last month or so. the owner keeps writing to me and asking when i'll be back, though- which is nice.

And my ex-Hot Boyfriend is STILL texting me, professing his undying love and begging me to see him again. Which is also nice:coolgleama:


I've mainly been concentrating on my two favorite boyfriends- Rico and Nick. I don't think I have much of a future with either of them, but they are just so darn hot and adorable!!!!

My bdsm girlfriend has turned out to be a real sweetie and a good pal. BTW-she took a bunch of photos of me recently and I might share a few. that way you can all see that I'm still looking fine! lol!


But right now, I'm going to get busy and go read some diaries. I have a LOT of catching up to do!!!!
 
Thanks so much! It's great to be back!!


I've only managed to catch up on two diaries so far! I'd better learn to read faster!
 
Yesterday was my birthday. I turned 46- which was a tiny bit scary, but not as bad as it could have been. At least I feel that I look better and feel better than I have in ages.


My eldest daughter got me some gorgeous flowers, the twins made me a sweet gift....and the creep husband took me out to a very posh restaurant.

You see, he still has no clue that a divorce is around the corner. So, I had to sit in a restaurant with him for a couple of hours. At least I looked pretty cute. I wore my fave dress- a size 4 Ralph Lauren mini-dress in white linen. I LOVE wearing it, even though my legs are not my best feature. (See photo above) But I still feel pretty hot in it...


I managed to stay on track very nicely at the restaurant and just had a dinner salad. I would have liked to have a drink...but I have to stay alert when I'm alone with the Creep. I don't want any hint of my plans to slip out....


The best part of my day was from three to five pm- I had an afternoon birthday date with my gorgeous young (just turned 40!) boyfriend. He's SUCH a sweetie and SO hot and we get along so well. When we're not getting crazy in bed, we endlessly discuss nerdy stuff l(ex: Game of Thrones, Battlestar Galactica, etc). We're total geeks and it's so fun!


And today I just got a text from R (my second-most-favorite boyfriend) who is just now home from vacationing with his kids. So, fun is in store on that front as well....
 
AHappy belated birthday :D

You look beautiful. You have got such a lovely shape to you and you are WEARIN' that dress!!! I am so glad that you are still maintaning, I got a bit worried hen you didn't reply before that you'd put some weight on and didn't want to admit it :) And I was also para for you that the creep had read all your posts on here! I would LOVE to see those BDSM pics ;) I'm not surprised you havent been to the club recently, you must be very busy with your hot lovers ;)

A sneaky lawer *rubs hands together*, ilikeit! Your "husband" isn't gonna know what has hit him, hope it gives him the reality "cheque" he so badly needs. I remember you saying about all the expensive gifts he bought for his girlfriend whilst you and your kids were on a budget. Nows the time for your expensive gift. And it won't be compensation enough.

I bet it'lll feel great not to have to put on an act at restaurants, and at home in front of guests. Its hard work keeping up a facade of being happy in front of other people, and every second of it feels WRONG. Sending you loads of strength hunni xxxxx
 
AHeya Rox
I was just checking out your diary and was just gonna say Hi so it comes up on my list. I noticed you had just come back so i thought i would just quickly read from there but OMG!!!!I have so gotta go back and read your life!!! You sound an amazing woman with a very exciting life.....Oh and you are gorgeous by the way!!!!! and that dress is stunning. Oh, to be that thin!! You have inspired!!
Xx
 
Originally Posted by katehunibun

Heya Rox
I was just checking out your diary and was just gonna say Hi so it comes up on my list. I noticed you had just come back so i thought i would just quickly read from there but OMG!!!!I have so gotta go back and read your life!!! You sound an amazing woman with a very exciting life.....Oh and you are gorgeous by the way!!!!! and that dress is stunning. Oh, to be that thin!! You have inspired!!
Xx

Thanks so much! I don't know if I'm amaziing...but as for exciting- I've definitely had enough excitement over the last year to last me a lifetime! lol!


Looking back at my diary, it seems like half of it is missing, for some reason. I guess the change of site format lost some content along the way? At any rate, if you'd like to know more details, just ask. I'm not shy, as you may have noticed!



I'm glad you guys approve of the dress. I just love it, even though my bare legs don't look that great. But it's such a summery dress that stockings look odd with it... I've been using self-tanner on my legs, though, which I think really helps. Yesterday, I even wore a apir of SHORTS out to the shops! That's right! A pair of cut-off jean shorts! I don't think I've worn shorts in public for at least 15 years.

What's more, I looked kinda cute and a rather attractive guy flirted with me. Crazy!!! My life right now is half nighmare/half dream-come-true. SO strange!


So...today it's my TOM, which I HATE. It makes the scale go up by two pounds, in general, and it makes me insane:willy_nilly:. I just need to keep off the scales at this time of the month. But i'm so used to monitoring myself, I find it hard to resist. And then I feel like complete crap all day long because it's my period and I weigh 142 lbs and not 140.

I think I'm probably officially insane......
 
AHey sweetie
I came on today and i did exactually the same as you.....Got on the bloody scales!!! Why do we do it?!?!? I feel crap enough as it is but to then be told 'ha ha' by the scales is just the final straw!!!!!
Not that i'm ranting about it at all tee hee!
I think i need chocolate, aparantly it's an amazing cure for period pains!! :icon_bs:
 
AYour legs are gorgeous, stop picking at yourself woman!!!! We would all give anything to have your figure :)

I know the whole exposed feeling of completely bare legs as well... Its only recently that I've not gone out without them on. I used to get some posh tights that have a thong type thing going in between your toes, they were ultra natural looking as well. So natural looking and sheer in fact that they probably didn't make any difference at all, it was more psychological than anything. I love sally hansens airbrush legs. But your legs are great wiothout all that anyway, so I dunno why I'm talking about it!

I have just had a great idea for period friendly scales which I've put on Kates' diary actually :)
 
ANo wonder you feel so "hot" in that little Ralph Lauren!! You look sexy and happy...what a fierce combo!! Love it!!
 
Happy belated birthday!!!! you look so lovely in that dress! It's hard to believe you are 46 - now if I look at your before pictures - that lady does look 46 + :)
 
I know that sometimes when people go away from this site for months at a time, it can mean that they've re-gained and get can't back on track.


I'm SO happy to say that it is NOT the case!

I'm been away because my life is so crazy and I just don't spend much time online these days. And what I'd reallly like to write about is more suited to a porn site than a weightloss forum:coolgleama:. I have SO many crazy sex adventures, but it's a secret life and I can't tell anyone. I just have one IRL girlfriend that knows what I'm getting into- but even she can't handle the details.


I'm not saying that maintaining my weight is easy- I have to think about it ALL the fucking time.

Which is a bore.

But I'm very motivated, as all of my sexual confidence is tied up in looking like I do....



Anyway- I promise myself to get back on my diary here. I know it will do me a world of good.

And I so much want to catch up on everyone's progress here and see how they're doing!!!!!


Have to go make lunch for the kiddos now- but I'll be back later!!!!
 
rox i have read most of your diary,think u are a fun person, possitive and a winner!your transformation is amazing and you have managed not only to loose weight and keep it off but also to have a super figure!
hope u keep posting!
 
Hi J! Thanks for the input! You're a brave woman to have read through most of my diary! It's kind of long and rambling- but hopefully not always boring :biggrin:


I'm hoping that getting back into my diary and getting involved in this site again will help me feel less stressed about maintaining. I often feel so alone and obsessive about my food and exercise. "Normal" people don't realise how hard it is for someone like me (a former binge eater!!) to look and act like a thin person. It still all feels artificial to me...it's hard to explain. It's hard and stressful....


I generally eat about 1400 calories per day. I can maintain on that, if I exercise about five days per week. With the stress I'm often under, I'm sometimes tempted to fall back into binge behavior. The evenings can be quite bad. I find the best thing to do is to go out and be with friends. It's funny- but when I'm out in social situations, I find it really easy not to eat ( or even drink alcohol). The people I know are all used to me only drinking Coke Zero, so they don't give me a hard time or try to tempt me. None of them know I used to be fat, of course....
 
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