Owl writes about things that make people blush

She's punctual, but she always overstays her welcome. And, she's a bloody mess. But, ya, pretty sure she's single. Want her number?
 
Owl said:
She's punctual, but she always overstays her welcome. And, she's a bloody mess. But, ya, pretty sure she's single. Want her number?
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I don't mind if she's a mess. I could always clean her up a bit, you know? And, I don't mind her overstaying her welcome, as long as she's warm and quiet. Sooooo...yeah, I'll take the digits.
 
She's visiting me right now, so I'll just give you mine...k?

Food today:
Breaky:
coffee: 100 (I add sugar free creamer, and lots of it)
oatmeal: 100 w/ a packet of splenda

Lunch:
Can of no fat refried beans: 350
jalapenos: 10
diet coke: 15

Planned dinner:
grilled chix tenderloin: 140
Broccoli/tomato/onion curry sautee: 100ish
brown rice 150
glass of wine 125

I don't have any snack foods at my house right now. Its grocery shopping time again, and frankly, I hate shopping if it cannot be done online. Also, if I write that something is 100 calories, I'm rounding up. Like with veggies, unless they are really fiberous, they don't have alot of calories to them.

Work has been very interesting today. Interesting patients. Interesting Doctors. Right now, I"m about to deal with a complaint from housekeeping about a crazy patient. Yeah!
 
I think it does. Nothing is calorie free, except maybe water and air. I always assign diet beverages a caloric value.
 
Magical punanis, joint custody of guitars, hot doctors, drool and Aunt flow.

Really never quite know what to expect in here huh?

For the record. What kind of guitar would be so special that shared custody would be required? I'd buy another damn guitar for myself unless I was in fact actually trying my best to go with the sneaky master plan of drunken angry sex as alluded to earlier.
 
man i missed a few posts in here...

haha...

you should be on the young and the restless or some other crazy show.
 
reluctantcabbie said:
Magical punanis, joint custody of guitars, hot doctors, drool and Aunt flow.

Really never quite know what to expect in here huh?

For the record. What kind of guitar would be so special that shared custody would be required? I'd buy another damn guitar for myself unless I was in fact actually trying my best to go with the sneaky master plan of drunken angry sex as alluded to earlier.
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It's an Ovation, and it's not so much the monitary value of it, as the sentimental value of it. We've had it since we were seniors in high school, we took it to college with us, it traveled everywhere with us for 4 years. Its like the dog, we got her our first year in college and share custody of her too. They are like out little family we never really had.

changes said:
man i missed a few posts in here...

haha...

you should be on the young and the restless or some other crazy show.
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Lol! naw, the camera adds 10 lbs, and on short fat chicks it looks like 30...so I'll pass on being the next day-time Danny DeVito.
 
MGR said:
Indeed it does, but not many at all. like 4 or 9 cals in a 20 oz. bottle. And Hi Owl!
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I had no idea.. but does drinking it sort of make the calories negative? Is that why it says zero? And how can it say zero if it's not, I mean, even my Sambucus says 25 calories in 2 TBSP. oh well...
 
confuzzledwife said:
I had no idea.. but does drinking it sort of make the calories negative? Is that why it says zero? And how can it say zero if it's not, I mean, even my Sambucus says 25 calories in 2 TBSP. oh well...
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I'm pretty sure that if the number of calories is low enough you can legally round down to 0. They only report calories accurate to some certain round numbers. If a bottle is somewhere around 5 calories and there are 2.5 servings per bottle, then you end up at 2 calories per serving and that's rounded down to 0.

EDIT: This will change based on the laws of the country in which it's sold.
 
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My motto is everything has calories. If it says zero...they are lying.

I'm having a hellaciously bad day. I don't often have bad days. I'm usually pretty easy going and let things slide off my back. But today, I want to kick asses. And, I want to eat poorly also. And, I want to drink beer, smoke cigarettes and spray paints something with naughty words and tasteless symbolism. But I may just need a nap.

I'm ragging out hard core. I've been through 5 tampons so far today and its not even noon yet. I woke up this morning in a puddle of my own blood. Hale womanhood. *insert sarcasm here* I need an extra strength Midol and some heroine.
 
Owl said:
My motto is everything has calories. If it says zero...they are lying.

I'm having a hellaciously bad day. I don't often have bad days. I'm usually pretty easy going and let things slide off my back. But today, I want to kick asses. And, I want to eat poorly also. And, I want to drink beer, smoke cigarettes and spray paints something with naughty words and tasteless symbolism. But I may just need a nap.

I'm ragging out hard core. I've been through 5 tampons so far today and its not even noon yet. I woke up this morning in a puddle of my own blood. Hale womanhood. *insert sarcasm here* I need an extra strength Midol and some heroine.
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:leaving: .
 
I thought the title of my diary pretty much said it all...

maybe I should have titled it "Read with extreme caution"
 
Oh, I wasn't offended or embarassed, as I have a wife and daughter and have dealt with these things before...

BUT, as a guy...I know when to leave the room when I don't want to talk about girl "stuff". That's why I have a shop...and a TV in the bedroom. :)

E.
 
I'm taking my cranky ass home for the weekend. Not that I get to rest. My son's blossoming career as an actor takes over most of the weekend for filming. Thankfully he doesn't have to memorize lines for these scenes. I just have to be the cranky stage mom who demands rest times at regular intervals. The only problem with this weekend is filming crowd scenes, my son is very shy. But, he wanted to act, so I just try and be supportive of his dreams. Maybe he'll change his mind.
 
Owl said:
My motto is everything has calories. If it says zero...they are lying
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I feel the same way! I also dont agree with people who say that it doesnt matter what calories go in as long as they are within your alotted calories for the day...dude if i have 2 scoops of ice cream and nothing else but fruit and veggies, the next day my hips look like they are 2 sizes larger!
 
fitforaking said:
Oh, I wasn't offended or embarassed, as I have a wife and daughter and have dealt with these things before...

BUT, as a guy...I know when to leave the room when I don't want to talk about girl "stuff". That's why I have a shop...and a TV in the bedroom. :)

E.
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Yeah I'm with Fit for raking here on that one. Thankfully, I can monitor at a safe distance through the anonymity of the internet. I prolly won't get caught in the driveby...

Actually I have a wife and 2 adult daughters. I'm also a night shift guy and my wife works days. You wanna know how many times I got a cal at work in the morning, "Hon, can you stop on the way home and pick up pads? The girls are out..."

I'm a good hubby and dad, I even knew which brand, style and size to get (that might just be a self preservaton reflex though).

Trust me my owlish friend, there is not much you could say that could be embarassing, offensive or likely to make me walk away. You should see some of the convo's I've been involved in in this place in the past...
 
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