nataliejo's diary: Moving, flowing, grooving forward... change is coming...

Mal ..
thanks

but anyway I do enjoy being his friend. I do enjoy it. I like him, but I know it just is not what he wants, so I am ok with being friends.

I dont expect him to like me ...in that way .. I figured it was boy code for not interested. Im sure he has other women he is interested in or will....

I know I am overweight and I think I am going to wait to actually date until I am thinner. Jumped of the Peter thing. I am just going to make friendships. I am not going to look for romance. Its nice cuddling with him, but I probably won't do anything more and if I did, I wouldnt let my emotions get involved, because that would be horrendous, so I am being very careful

well ttylater
love yas
natalie jo
 
So I have decided to be alone completely. I have made a couple friends over the last week. So I am happy to have the friends to chat with. One really isnt available, which sucks. I love to talk. And the other wants to hang out really badly, so we will see, but right now I am thinking you are all right and I need to love myself, before someone else can love me and I need to treat myself right

so ttylater
love yas
natalie jo :seeya:
 
HI NJ

Wow look at your ticker moving down!!!!

BOYS suck
I think he has issues that he needs to work out and its good he has told you now and not months down the line (my best mates BF has just told her that he thinks he doesnt want a GF after 5 months of being together!!!)
I doubt it has anything to do with you at all and certainly not your body.

The being friends is far more important than being BF and GF and if you are meant to be BF and GF then it will happen
i think you have made a good choice there become happy with yourself first if your not happy it will get in the way

Sarah
 
maleficent said:
Why would you cuddle and snuggle with someone who's got no interest in anything with you? Why don't you have more respect for yourself than that?

oooh boy i'm crabby today :)
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Thank you Mal you havent said anything that nobody wasn't thinking:) Ive been reading Nat but not posting - you need to figure out what you are doing and do it! Most importantly stick to it, and be true to yourself....I totally agree withthe cuddling thing - like how my ex wanted to always be friends - friends who kissed and touched, made out and had sex...Well I dont do that with my other friends, plus my friends treat me with respect and love and are there for me through thick and think he never was. Define what a friend is...know your principles and how you wanna be treated and never settle for less.People will respect you for that. (Wow pretty ensightful for someone dealing with as much as I am - HAHAHAHA!!!
 
rah said:
HI NJ

Wow look at your ticker moving down!!!!

BOYS suck
I think he has issues that he needs to work out and its good he has told you now and not months down the line (my best mates BF has just told her that he thinks he doesnt want a GF after 5 months of being together!!!)
I doubt it has anything to do with you at all and certainly not your body.

The being friends is far more important than being BF and GF and if you are meant to be BF and GF then it will happen
i think you have made a good choice there become happy with yourself first if your not happy it will get in the way

Sarah
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Hey Rah,
Your totally right...
and thats how I feel, its more important to have friends, than a bf. I really don't want to be hitched right now. I am not happy, except I am happy I am making more friends. I just hung out with Eric, another new friend, and we took a long walk and hung out and watched, The Lake House, with keanu Reeves in and what not

Thanks hun

ttylater
always
natalie jo
 
cinderelly said:
Thank you Mal you havent said anything that nobody wasn't thinking:) Ive been reading Nat but not posting - you need to figure out what you are doing and do it! Most importantly stick to it, and be true to yourself....I totally agree withthe cuddling thing - like how my ex wanted to always be friends - friends who kissed and touched, made out and had sex...Well I dont do that with my other friends, plus my friends treat me with respect and love and are there for me through thick and think he never was. Define what a friend is...know your principles and how you wanna be treated and never settle for less.People will respect you for that. (Wow pretty ensightful for someone dealing with as much as I am - HAHAHAHA!!!
Click to expand...

He never said we needed to sleep together, he actually has said, he is more than comfortable doing nothing.

I think I am totally fine with the kind of relationship we might have. And I do have respect for myself, enough not to want a relationship with anymore. I do like to cuddle with him, I dont have to, but I choose too ..

I have made another friend and we hung out today and we walked and watched a movie. I dont think I need attachments and I dont think I am disrespecting myself by cuddling with him, if anything I am making it easier not to have a bf. I get to cuddle, but no attachments. Because I dont want to be with a man. I want to just have friends, maybe its taboo to sleep with him because we are just friends, but u know what its not taboo for me.. I think I like it just fine and it doesnt mean I am less off a woman, or a whore, just make me different.. I know what I want in my life and I like being his friends and would like to sleep with him possibly, knowing there are no attachements. I dont need any attachments and I like hanging out with my other new friend, not going to sleep with them, but I like the friendly connection we have ..

I am having fun. and I need to have fun and find more friend and I am happy where I am at now with friends

I know you guys care
but now I have someone to walk with, talk with, enjoy time with ..ect ..

and its not a bf, its just a friend

well ttylater
love yas
natalie jo
 
hello everyone,
I know some of you are not happy with my choices, but needless to say I am happy.

Anyway so I walked today for thirty minutes with Eric. Nice walking buddy and he is going to call me after he is done with work tomorrow. He is a teacher of martial arts, which is kind of cool and he looks the part as well lol which he says he loves, the long hair, ect.

Anyway so he is supposed to call tomorrow and I may join him again for a walk and just watch movies afterwards. I think that would be a lot of fun...

Well nothing going on this weekend, except for Mothers day, but we are not celebrating mothers day until the seventeenth when all of my sisters mother and I can get together in Boston and have a good time ...

anyway ttylater and my eating is going well too!

ttylater
love yas
always
natalie jo :driving:
 
I weigh 270.8 pounds!!Just wait!! I will be out of the 270s for good soon!! I am going to take a nice walk today!

love yas
always
natalie jo :party:
 
Congratulations on the loss! It's wonderful to be so close to a big milestone! Keep up all that fabulous walking.

Sophie
 
Hey sexy,

Keep up the good work! \I'm going for a nightly walk right now as well. You WANT to be out of the 270s - it will feel so good!!!

Well take care! mwah!
 
:party:BYE-BYE 270s...

You are rockin' the scale, sistah! Keep up the AWESOME work! :driving:

Come check out my new photos. Take care!

janice
 
ok everyone who wrote, thank you so much. I needed people to write who cared. I have been in a bad place lately. I kind of had a crush on Jay, and he still wants to be friends, he is totally cool about it, but I kind of freaked and went on on tangents, but things are fine now, but I will probably feel better tomorrow... lol wow ... right when you think your safe, wham you form feelings for the other person lol but he is such a good friend, and we havent even done anything sexual lol he just has this fabulous loving, caring personality and he is so wonderful and I just fell lol

but I am not feeling so attached to him, he makes a good friend ..and whatever happens happens, but he did tell me he values me as a friend, wants to hang out, we are planning to go hiking on some trails behind his house ...its connects to the NH Trails... so we will be busy and I will get to work off more weight ..shall be nice to have someone to walk with ...

And as far as Derick, he really likes me, but I dont like him as more than a friend, so I told him he is just a friend, as Jay is, and he kind of told me he would talk with me, when he gets around to it lol so there goes that one ..

dont love trianges suck lol

well ttylater
love yas
and my weight is still down, just hasnt moved out of the 270s, but I am taking my metabolic pills and My metabolism will be kicking it up a notch ... I figure a seven pounds loss in two weeks, with eating right and exercise ..

love yas
natalie jo :party::party::party:
 
Hello my dearest!!! I'm so glad to see you feeling good and CONGRATULATIONS on the weight loss!!! You are definitely motivating me, chica! I gotta get back off my butt and into the new gym in our apt complex.

As far as everything goes with the love triangles and whatnot, only you know what is going to make you happy. :) Everyone in the world can give you advice on what to do, but at the end of the day you're the one who is responsible for your own choices. Only you know what kind of decisions are going to contribute best to your own happiness. And as long as you are happy, that's the most important thing in the world!!

*HUGS* I'm so glad to see you doing well. And I'm finally back from my hiatus with moving!!! YAY!
 
heathercb04 said:
Hello my dearest!!! I'm so glad to see you feeling good and CONGRATULATIONS on the weight loss!!! You are definitely motivating me, chica! I gotta get back off my butt and into the new gym in our apt complex.

As far as everything goes with the love triangles and whatnot, only you know what is going to make you happy. :) Everyone in the world can give you advice on what to do, but at the end of the day you're the one who is responsible for your own choices. Only you know what kind of decisions are going to contribute best to your own happiness. And as long as you are happy, that's the most important thing in the world!!

*HUGS* I'm so glad to see you doing well. And I'm finally back from my hiatus with moving!!! YAY!
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Hey Heather! Thanks for writing, and Thank you to everyone else you cares and wrote...

I think I have made some good decisions Heather. I am really happy having friends! Its great. Derek is talking again, we are walking buddies. We walked seven miles yesterday.. it was fun ..

thanks for your well wishes
love yas
natalie jo :cheers2:
 
Hello everyone,
I am now down to 267.9 as of today! yea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
celebrate good times, come on! lol

ttylater
love yas
natalie jo :hurray::hurray::hurray:
 
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