Misty's Diary

Well...I don't know how much I weigh today, I don't really want to check the scale. Blah.

I'm back to work tomorrow- vacation is OVER! Three weeks on the job and then don't know what lies in store for me. I'm kind of excited, kind of scared. I feel like it's going to be a new beginning for me and I'm positive about the change right now. But I have to job hunt full force today and fit in exercise.

It's going to be difficult to keep the motivation going b/c job hunting is a stressful process and I expect more from myself. I really want to be the best I can be and I just don't like to see myself not reaching my potential- whether it be because of mistakes I make or luck.

Anyways, on the weight side, 18 lbs in 3.5 months- 4 months. Can I do it? Helllllll yeah.
 
Sept 21, 10:52 AM

Okay, to keep my sanity I have to change the foods I have been eating. Tomorrow for breakfast I will have:

1) bowl of oatmeal
2) glass of orange juice with iron pills


Dinner:
1) Glass of milk
2) Salad
3) Fruit salad


Okay. This week is diet change test week. Let's see if I can stick to this!!!
 
Today has been the worst day in a while. Really crummy day. Had an argument with my dad at 6 fuckin AM.

I stupidly backed out the car and didn't notice the garbage bin on the corner of the curb until I hit it and the paper in it fell onto the drive way and the street. Anyways, having realized what I did, I got out of the car to pick up my mess...anyways long story short, my dad helped me clean the mess because he heard me knock over the bin (yes, it was that loud) and he was FUMING. Basically ruined my day and then when I get home my mum starts in on me. Even better.

It's been a long day. I just got back from class. It's past midnight, I'm exhausted and still upset over....I guess...my stupid mistake but also the fact that my parents are makin SUCH a big deal out of this. Blah.

Anyways, I havn't had much to eat today- egg sandwich in the morning....apple juice...orange juice...granola bar...coffee....been on the run for most of the day.

It's going to be a rough week. I just need to make it till Friday.
 
I didn't go to work today, but I will have to make up for it on Saturday, which isn't such a big deal. It's a pleasant relief going in to work on Saturdays sometimes.

Tomorrow is going to be a crazy day...work then downtown...then back to a place near work for dinner with a coworker...and then home.

I'm going to fix up my resume and create a stellar cover letter and then head for class. These days life seems to be a big blur. I'm busier than I used to be- but the business will cease after my last day at work- weirdly.
 
So I went Salsa dancing- and it was fun! However, I was probably the chubbiest one there :( BUT that is sooooo going to change!!

I have 17-18 more lbs to lose by the end of December. I have 14 weeks to make this work. That means a weight loss of 1.2 lbs per week.

Starting tomorrow I am going to take a nightly walk.

Sunday: walking
Monday: walking
Tues Wed Thurs : classes- no time to exercise
Friday: gym if I don't go out with friends
Sat & Sun: gym gym gym gym

Well balanced diet. No over eating.
 
Next few days are going to be absolutely crazy. Will get time to go to gym on Friday. If I can get my eating habits under control until then that's all I need to get through this week!!!!
 
Crazy Busy week! So glad tomorrow is Friday, I get to sleep in Sat morning!! But anyways, just a reminder to myself: next week the goal is 116. oneeeee oneeeee siiiiiiixxxxxxxx......................I cannnn dooo this.
 
I fell off the bandwagon real bad this week. But I'm back on!

We had some pics taken on Sat and I didn't look good at all- as usual chubbiest one. Argh. Oh well. 20 more lbs. I just need the discipline to do this. Thats all. Going to bed now.
 
Twenty pounds in four months is definitely doable. Are you getting enough sleep? You sound very busy and its tough to control your appetite if you haven't had enough rest. Keep at it.
 
Today I watched, Run Fatboy Run, at a friend's house. I HEART Simon Pegg- great actor! Anyways, gave me new motivation to lose these last 19 lbs. Also, my contract ends this week so...yeah I'm looking for employment again. I've always found exercise to be good during times when you don't feel like you're on top of the world- I hope to be making it to the gym this week instead of letting the stress get to me.

Let's see!
 
Today has been a blah day.

I've felt very restless the entire day. It's 10:22pm now and I am far from sleepy :(

My priorities for this weekend are:
a) Gym
b) Job hunting
c) Class project

In that order....

The weight goal for next week is 117 lbs. I'd like to get my legs in shape.
 
Fine so far....

I'm planning to go out for a walk tonite- yesterday was chilly. I should have bundled up and worn a cap/ ear muffs. I'm going to do that today - I only got one round around the block yesterday. The most I've done is two. My aim for today is three. I know I can do it. I just need to go at it. It's a bit too late to go to the gym so I need to get my walk in.
 
Yesterday went really well for me in terms of exercise- not so much eating.

The scale this morning read 118 lbs. The goal is to bring that morning weight down to 117lbs. I'm not sure if I'll be able to do that in two days....regardless...my goal weight for the end of this week/ beginning of next week is 116lbs. Let's see if I can do this :)

On the job front, things are moving slow. I have a few good postings I would like to apply to - the cover letter is what takes me the longest...customization and such. Regardless, I will settle for something part time until December.
 
For days now I've been trying to figure out, what is my motivation?

Today it struck me, mental peace. I want to be at peace with myself, not having to think, I need to lose weight.

Tomorrow is a new day and I'm hitting the gym with new enthusiasm.
 
I got one of those rejection letters today....I don't know what else you'd call them, lol. One of those, "we regret to inform you that your application cannot be progressed blah blah blah"- so it's kind of been a downer. I snacked on a mini Kit Kat to *make myself feel better*- I know, not the best way to have handled it. Sigh.

I don't know what to do anymore. My job hunt is going nowhere. Blah. But why should I let this get to me? I shouldnt. In fact, I should be even more aggressive with this job hunt. But motivation is not coming easy today.......or right now at least.
 
I weighed in at 117.2 lbs this morning. I am a bit skeptical....I did get quite a bit of walking in yesterday tho and ate light.

Tomorrow I am going out for sushi...I'm thinking I should have said, no. I still can say no....not sure. I haven't been out with K for a while and it would be good to have something to do on a Saturday night. OR maybe I can get a super good workout Sat morning and then Sat night eating out wouldn't be as bad.

Anyhoo, the goal for mon is 116 lbs- morning start weight.
 
I've been thinking about it and I have decided NOT to go to the sushi place tomorrow. I don't think a weekend buffet is a good idea. I know myself and I know I will pig out, so best keep myself away from temptation- or at least until I can get to a healthier weight.

Kind of sucks, I was looking forward to hanging out with friends, but so what, maybe I can curl up in bed with a good book instead.

Goals for tomorrow:
- Give referances to Yvana
- Call K and cancel
- Gym
- Interview Practice
- Job Apps
- Portfolio work
- Nightly walk
 
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