Marsia's Diary

Hey Marsia, good to see you back!

Condolences for your mother, I know that has to be hard. You should take some consolation in knowing how much you did for her, right not that may be limited comfort, it will take time. I lost my mother about 10 years ago, hardly a day goes by that I don't think about her, but it is no longer a sad thing, but that takes time. Mothers are important.

Big Sur is a great place! I have not been for a while, reading your post reminded me of that. I also think of a camper van from time to time, but am concerned that I would not get enough use out of it to justify the cost. Good luck with your search, you live in a place where you could use one year round.
 
What a horrendous job. I hate cleaning my fridge, let alone one that hadn't been cleaned for a long time. You poor thing. A friend of ours has pancreatic cancer. It's an awful thing.
Is your Mum's house on the same title as yours, M? Could it become your studio? I wish I could come & help you!
 
I hope once the kitchen is clean you can do the rest a little more slowly. It must have been such a shock to open that fridge :eek: Amazing work not regaining everything and more while you were under so much pressure, by the way!
 
I have a lot of artwork in my head and me-time planned out, but I think I am also just not pressuring myself to do too much so I enjoy what I am doing, and maybe that can be me-time, too to some extent.
Me time definitely isn't just about productivity. Enjoy whatever you (don't) do!
 
It does sound lovely and I'm glad to hear you're still going to/getting therapy. Is it over the internet or in person right now?
 
I really wish I could do IF. I’m glad it suits you. Weighing out nuts & dried fruit & then checking out their calories sure is an eye opener!
 
No idea, so I just try to make myself useful and be content with what I have. If any urgent plans come up I can always change course.
 
Do you guys know what you really want in life?
I don't think I want much out of life, except for what I have right now. I did, however, spend half my life wondering what I should be doing with my life & that was a big waste. I was so restless for most of my younger life. I think that's normal. I just want a simple life & money doesn't matter much so long as you can pay the bills. I think simplifying your life and doing more of the things that bring you joy is the key, instead of worrying what others think you should be doing, how much money you should be earning etc.
I love to just enjoy nature, enjoy spending time with & being loved by my family, my little dog & where I live. I don't care for much more. I'm no longer chasing my tail.
 
Hi Marisa,

It's a bit late but so sorry for your Mom's loss. You really took good care of her.

I love the idea of simplifying. It feels like cleaning, which always makes you feel better, wish I did more of it.

In his novel "La Peste", The Plague, Sarte's protagonist and his friend agreed what they wanted out of life was "la paix intérieure", interior peach. That's what I want. How to get there is a little trickier.
 
I have been just sitting down and feeling my feelings more (especially because I am in mourning and I really need to) and they quickly calm down and release given just a little compassionate attention. I need to keep doing this - it is making me sooo much more in touch with my life and way more relaxed!
That sounds lovely. Scary, but lovely.
Glad the raccoons didn't totally ruin your sprouts.
 
I always love hearing about your meditation & am glad that you are letting yourself really feel your feelings. You have been through so much & will need to be very gentle with yourself.
Just for fun I looked up North Carolina's attractions & then some real estate. Check this out- 1052 Yorktown Drive, Charleston, SC 29412 House for Sale - realestate.com.au It was the first house I looked at.
 
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