Lisa's Journal

I want to make one but i have NO idea how... I just signed up here and it's like a maze lol. I wanna make one of those little ticker things, too.

I deserve a beating, though. I had pizza for breakfast... goooo me. :eek:
 
lol yeah it takes a while to figure out how to navigate this place, but once you do, its pretty easy. To make a journal, go to the weight loss diary section and click on New Thread. Then you get to name your journal and put in your first entry, after that its just like responding to any other entry on here. To make a ticker, go to Graphical Event Ticker for your Signature, Message Boards, Blogs and Web Page and then from the list at the bottom choose weight loss and follow the directions. Once you make one (I chose for it to track weight, rather than weight change), it will give you some codes to choose from. Choose the bbCode one and copy and paste it onto your signature, which you can choose on the left hand side on this thing once you click UserCP. Lol it sounds a lot more confusing than it is. Once you get it, though, it will be easy to do and update.

Don't worry about the pizza too much. Just count it in with your daily calories and try to stay within a reasonable range for the day. I rarely have a day where I don't "cheat" in some form, but I just add it in with my calories and try to stay within my limit.

Well let me know if you have any trouble with starting the journal or getting a ticker, i'll try to help :)
 
yayyy!! So damn, you've lost 40 pounds already huh?! I've gotten into SUCH a junkfood rutt, here! Do you have a photo album or anything that I could see? Sorry if you posted it somewhere already and I'm just too lame to notice :p
 
gennybear said:
yayyy!! So damn, you've lost 40 pounds already huh?! I've gotten into SUCH a junkfood rutt, here! Do you have a photo album or anything that I could see? Sorry if you posted it somewhere already and I'm just too lame to notice :p
Click to expand...

Yes...40lbs...its weird though cause since I see myself everyday, I dont really feel any smaller. I have some photos floating around the before and after section. On Friday I think I am going to post a new thread showing the 40lb difference and it will also be my before picture for the Summer Fitness Challenge. The last time I posted in there it was after I had lost 25lbs, so there is a little more difference now.

I have been in a bit of a rutt too lately. My numbers keep falling, but i'm not really sure how lol. I used to eat a lot more healthily than I have been lately. I think I just burned myself out on eating salads and black beans everyday. Right now I have to deal with whatever they give me at the college cafeteria, so hopefully this summer when I can make some yummy healthy food, I can get back to my healthier eating. My main temptation is sweets....and at the cafeteria they offer dessert for lunch and dinner, but I normally don't eat them... its hard :( lol.
 
Well I weighed myself today and had a 2.2lb loss since last wednesday, so I went ahead and changed my ticker.

Calories for today
Breakfast: zone bar and a small amount of peanuts- 250 calories
Lunch: spinach and beans- approx. 250 calories
Snacks: apple and kashi cookie- 210 calories
Dinner: bleh....I dont even want to talk about it lol........but I will.......I don't think it was toooo bad, but it definitely brought my calorie count for the day higher than I wanted it to go. I had spinach, cottage cheese, a baked potato and a cupcake (today was build you own cupcake at the cafeteria lol so I HAD to make one :p ) I am going to approximate between 900-1000 calories for the meal, but I could be really off.
Running total: 1610-1710 calories (this is a guesstimate- I could be really off)
 
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I don't get to walk again tonight :( . My school started this thing where people who are studying abroad have to do this study abroad workshop (study abroad is really big at my school so they have this whole system set up now). Well, for this workshop we had to learn all about cultural awareness and such. Tonight is the last meeting and we have to give a 15 minute powerpoint presentation on the country we are going to. I have a partner, so it will be more like 7 1/2 min presentation, but still.......its a scary thought. I'm not that bad with getting nervous speaking in front of people, but its not my favorite thing to do. But anyways, I have to go to that from 7-10 (though I think it will last until about 11) so I don't get to do my nightly walk again :( .

I think that I have realized I have a VERY skewed vision of my body. I know that I AM fat, but my picture of myself is not how everyone else's is. I picture myself as this huge disgusting blob that takes up TONS of space. But then I see other people who weigh more than I do and I think "well they dont look very big" because in my mind I am a monster! lol. I think I have had this problem for a very long time. It probably started in elementary school when evil kids (elementary school kids ARE evil) made fun of me. I was never an outcast, it was more of isolated events that still haunt me. I remember being 10 years old and having a crush on this kid. His best friend, who lived across the street from me, found out and one day I went across the street with some friends to play with them (cause we played together a lot) and the kid who lived across the street from me looked at me and then looked at the kid I liked and said "Hey Ryan, you know Lisa has a crush on you" and then Ryan said "eww, that fat bitch, thats gross". I remember running home and crying for hours in my moms arms. Karma actually helped me a little with this situation cause about 4 years later I was at a lock in at a lazer zone and I saw this kid who looked like Ryan (except he still looked 10 years old). So I went up to him and asked him if he had an older brother named Ryan. Turned out...this kid was Ryan, he just hadn't gone through puberty yet lol. I unintentionally burst out laughing, which I know was mean, but wow, it felt a little good. Lol that little side note isn't the point, the point is that I have had a few of these instances where it is blatantly pointed out to me how disgustingly fat I am...and I think this has had a REAL effect on me and how I view myself. I often feel unworthy and that people are embarassed to be around me. I feel bad for my friends who have to go places with me and be seen with this disgusting blob that is HUGE. I know my friends would never think this, but its SOOO hard to keep this thought from creeping up in the back of my head.

So that is my insight for the day. It is something I really need to work on because I know I will never really succeed with this journey I'm on unless I first love myself.
 
Atta girl... You know you're on your way! Forget EVERYONE who ever said you were fat, or ever said you couldn't reach your goals.

I know exactly how you feel and exactly what you mean. I could look at myself in the mirror and want to scream, but then I will see someone who I know weighs more than me and I don't think they look bad at all. We are all our own harshest critics.

Lately I have been trying to overcome this and have a pretty effective (little silly, but effective) way of removing the negative thoughts that I have about myself from my head.

Here's how I do it, when I am thinking something bad about myself I will:
1. Visualize a big chalkboard in my head (green, black, you choose:p )
2. Visualize my negative thought on the chalkboard (whether it be words or whatever that negative thought is)
3. Take my giant eraser and mentally erase the negative thought from the chalkboard
4. Write a positive thought about myself on the chalkboard

I know it's a little silly, but really it just helps to clear my mind and help me focus on targeting those negative thoughts and stopping them in their tracks.

I think about it this way... someone says something mean to you, that you know isn't true, you simply tell them to F-off, knowing that they don't have any idea what they're talking about.

Tell that negative-thought monster in your head to F-off, too. Who says it knows what it's talking about!

Know what I mean, jellybean?
 
pssst - don't listen to the voices - i'll tell yoou a secret - I'm always right about everything :D (others haven't caught on to this yet, but it's all part of my world domination plan) You are a beautiful young woman - I've seen pictures... I wouldn't fib to you -- none of this disgusting blob talk cuz you aren't one.. at all..

Got it missy? :D

Don't make me send you to the dungeon where the peoeple who disagree with me go and I won't say what they hve to do there ... :D
 
gennybear said:
Atta girl... You know you're on your way! Forget EVERYONE who ever said you were fat, or ever said you couldn't reach your goals.

I know exactly how you feel and exactly what you mean. I could look at myself in the mirror and want to scream, but then I will see someone who I know weighs more than me and I don't think they look bad at all. We are all our own harshest critics.

Lately I have been trying to overcome this and have a pretty effective (little silly, but effective) way of removing the negative thoughts that I have about myself from my head.

Here's how I do it, when I am thinking something bad about myself I will:
1. Visualize a big chalkboard in my head (green, black, you choose:p )
2. Visualize my negative thought on the chalkboard (whether it be words or whatever that negative thought is)
3. Take my giant eraser and mentally erase the negative thought from the chalkboard
4. Write a positive thought about myself on the chalkboard

I know it's a little silly, but really it just helps to clear my mind and help me focus on targeting those negative thoughts and stopping them in their tracks.

I think about it this way... someone says something mean to you, that you know isn't true, you simply tell them to F-off, knowing that they don't have any idea what they're talking about.

Tell that negative-thought monster in your head to F-off, too. Who says it knows what it's talking about!

Know what I mean, jellybean?
Click to expand...


Thanks so much. I really like your idea with the chalkboard. I actually did it as I read that and it worked pretty well lol, it made me feel better right away :) . I try to tell those thoughts to F- off all the time lol, maybe I just need to be a little more forceful :p . Thanks for all the nice words :)
 
maleficent said:
pssst - don't listen to the voices - i'll tell yoou a secret - I'm always right about everything :D (others haven't caught on to this yet, but it's all part of my world domination plan) You are a beautiful young woman - I've seen pictures... I wouldn't fib to you -- none of this disgusting blob talk cuz you aren't one.. at all..

Got it missy? :D

Don't make me send you to the dungeon where the peoeple who disagree with me go and I won't say what they hve to do there ... :D
Click to expand...

Thanks so much Aunt Mal :) I definitely don't want to go to that dungeon lol. And thanks for the nice compliments :)

I really love this place......... :)
 
yay! so today I weighed in at 240.1 which is close enough to 240 for me lol. This means that I am no longer morbidly obese (according to BMI standards)!!! I know that I am still "obese" lol, but having that morbidly part removed feels really good. My loss for this week from last friday is 3.2lbs which I am pretty freakin happy with considering my eating lately has been less than ideal. I am about to do a new before and after thread with my pictures from today. 40lbs!!!!! wooohooo

Oh, and I did measurements and I lost 8.75in since the last time I took them which was about a month ago. So I am pretty happy with that as well.

I don't like the pictures I took to post in before and afters, so I'm not sure that I am going to do that right now, I might just wait until I hit the 50lb mark. I'll post a picture in the summer challenge section though for my before picture.
 
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lol i changed my mind again...i swear i am the most indecisive person in the world, but I put up before and after pictures, so you can find them in the before and after section.
 
4 miles on the track tonight

Total miles: 58.7 miles

Today I ate pretty unhealthily.........well actually A LOT unhealthily. But thats ok, I think i stayed within a reasonable calorie range and I did exercise tonight which makes me feel a little better. Tomorrow I am going to PF Changs. I went on the website and looked up some of the things I can eat being a vegetarian and how many calories they have and wrote them down so I can take it with me. If anyone has any suggestions for what is good, let me know. Hope everyone has a great weekend :)
 
if you're undecided about the pics, you can do what i did - i took pics about once a month or every 10lbish. Its made a great weight loss timeline now that always cheers me up when im having a crap day :)
 
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