Lisa's Final Countdown, The Good Days, the Bad, & the Ugly

Ha ha I know! It actually works though... I haven't done it for a while (maybe I'll have to pick it back up) but I remember I would break a sweat trying to "beat my time" LOL!!! HAD to have some music to help me out though! ;)
 
Ok I need to get this out somewhere because it's stressing me out and I do not need to stuff my face today because of it, so my journal is as good a place as any.

I love my job but we have been running short on staff for some time. The company has been as well so they are not only lowering their standards on who they hire, they are also not listening to managers when one is not working out because they have no replacements. They've actually allowed people in with criminal records and who are on heavy meds for mental issues.

Which brings me to what's stressing me out. They hired this woman (I'll call her Sue) to work at our house. She's had problems from day one and shouldn't have lasted this long but like I said, the higher up bosses said we have to give her a chance....even though normally they would have terminated her already.

So "Sue" has mental problems for which she is on a ton of meds. Now there are people in this situation and you would never know, but then they take responsibility for themselves. Sue however came in last night without hers and I ended up staying over an hour off the clock trying to calm her down because I didn't feel safe leaving her the way she was acting. I even told her to go get her meds but she refused because its a long drive. So instead she went to calm down and get some soda and tylenol for her headache.

I guess I should mention this woman was tripping over nothing....she's seeing some married guy and upset by the way he's treating her and was upset she couldn't spend "sweetest day" with him. What set her off is she had a date with a different guy instead that treated her great but it wasn't the guy she wanted to be with. So she came in crying, shaking, all agitated and tripping out at work.

On top of it the girls I am staff for were still up and she started picking a fight with one she has been holding a grudge towards. As staff this is so not ok...yes stuff gets to everyone after a while but if she is taking stuff personal this soon in she's in the wrong field. And even when I've been burnt out I realized it was ME...on burn out and needed a break. As staff we're the ones who have to deal objectively no matter what. And she actually told me she's holding a grudge.

So last night I handled HER like she was one of the people I take care of just to calm her down. It was stressful and I was tired and stressed out by it so I went to bed and didn't let myself think about it. But this morning in the light of day and with some rest, I DID think about it and this is ridiculous...it is her responsibility as STAFF to take her own meds and to not come to work and take her crap out on the girls. If she can't do that she needs to leave. I should never feel uneasy about leaving staff alone with the girls. Seriously this whole thing upsets me, and yea it also pisses me off because I feel like I have no control over the situation at all and something bad is going to happen.

I have this knot in the pit of my stomach over the whole thing and I tried to reach our supervisor but she hasn't called me back. Hopefully she will. Part of me wants to sit down with "Sue" and talk to her about what happened last night but honestly the other part of me doubts it will do any good...she really is unstable and they need to get rid of her. Which honestly I really wanted her to work out and tried to help her any way I could because if they DO get rid of her and don't fill her spot I will have to go back to full night shift until they do. But honestly at this point I don't know what she's capable of and the girls safety is more important. Unfortunately getting the company I work for to take this seriously when they're not seeing it themselves is going to be difficult ;/.
 
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"SUE" sounds like more of a handful then a coworker should be. What exactly do you do for a profession?

I'm glad you came to WLF instead of the the refrigerator. It shows how much you have improved. :D Major props to you. lol.
 
What is your profession is my question too... sounds like you might be in a field I used to be in and the Staff's attitude and ability to leave their life outside the door is CRITICAL! Hopefully your supervisor will call you back... unfortunate you don't really have enough QUALITY people to replace "Sue" though... Glad you came to your journal Lisa! Hope you're day gets better! :seeya:
 
I've worked with people who are developmentally disabled for about ten years now. I've worked in the schools, done in home care, and now I'm working in a group home. I don't really like to call it a "group home" though because it's not a facility. The four young women I work with all live in a house together as room mates and we help them as needed. At this house, where I've worked the last 3 years, they are pretty high functioning and can do alot for themselves. But they are stuck at an emotional level like kids where they don't want to and try to cut corners. Lots of drama on any given day, lol. But I'm very fond of them and enjoy working there, especially on weekends we have a blast. But the company I work for needs to get a clue. This is the second nutso they've sent us in the last few months and its getting old. Everyone has their quirks and I don't mind people who are a tad out there but when I have to worry about the girls I take care of being safe when I leave from another staff person....well thats too much.

So anyway yea I did get ahold of my supervisor...today. She then had me call her supervisor and also write the incident up. Did I mention that last night "Sue" initially asked me to talk to her privately and headed for the bathroom and proceeded to drop her pants and pee in front of me with the girls right there in the hallway? I backed out pretty fast telling her that wasn't cool and closed the door as she was telling me "we're all girls here". Even if I wasn't uncomfortable with that, c'mon are we trying to teach the girls it's ok to go to work and pee with the door open? Also she's asked me for vicodin or "something" to help her calm down.

Tonight I talked to her when she got there and told her I did not like how she had jumped on one of the girls last night and she actually didn't remember any of it. She asked me "what did I say?". Of course she may have been playing dumb because as nice as I was, she still looked pissy after. She said again that she didn't realize she'd said anything like that.

I told her if she had meds she needed to take that we are allowed to keep them there locked up but that was her responsibility to make sure she has them. I'm talking about her PRESCRIBED meds, not whatever she's pill popping besides like vicodin. Just from what she told me she's been prescribed she's already on some heavy duty meds. Not sure where I found the guts to say this either but I also told "Sue" straight up that I had not felt safe leaving her at the house last night. She doesn't know this but if she ever comes in like that again I'm to call the manager to have somebody come in and her sent home.

Anyway my calories for today totaled 1961
 
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On a more positive note, I was about to go to bed because I'm exhausted and checked my email first. My math class first thing in the morning was cancelled :D YAY That means more sleep and a bit of time to finish up the last of my lab report.

Also, some of you may remember me posting about the job my husband ALMOST got a month ago driving a chip route truck that would have been really good income. Short version, he actually was hired and had a training day but the big boss forgot to tell the guy who does the hiring that he'd already given the job to somebody else because they knew the route already. Anyway the GOOD news is another route opened up, which hardly ever happens, and my husband got it. Of course I'm a bit nervous after what happened last time but that was a weird situation.

So things are looking up :)
 
Wow, if there was ever a need to have responsible people at work, your place sounds like the one. Sucks you had to play nurse maid to your co-worker.

Good about the driving route for hubby. It'll be nice to get some better income flow.

Check ya later!
 
wow, sounds like a stressful job. Writing things out is definitely important...I know when I am stressed I find myself eating things that have crunch...potato chips/cornchips even carrots...its like I have to chew it up...I also am told I eat faster...

Congrats to your hubby and the job..and congrats on the extra sleep.

Happy Monday (I have mondays off..yay)
 
Thanks guys, my job normally isn't any more stressful than any other and usually alot more fun. But it only takes one coworker to rock the boat sometimes and this one is something else. Anxiety or being upset causes a knot in my stomach that I sometimes mistake for hunger and I'm working on that. Eating does dull that sensation but seriously some hot tea would have the same effect so I need to work on relaxing, not eating. And I'm glad to say I did pretty good this weekend avoiding alot of bad choices.
 
I'm glad you talked to your supervisor. I'm surprised you didn't slap that girl to knock some sense into her! lol.

I'm glad you are learning to satiate that "knot" in your stomach with tea, or just relaxing. I need to do that. I raised my calories at least by 1000 yesterday night REALLY late because I got really upset, and didn't do anything but raid cabinets. *slaps self on hand*. I'm glad you are learning. Great job with your calories and such.

I really hope your hubby gets that job, it would be nice to anyone to have a little extra income. Your job does sound like it is a lot of fun.
 
Hey girl! That's great about your hubby! I'll keep my fingers crossed that it all works out for ya!
Yep, your occupation is exactly what I thought it was. Kudos to you! :hurray: Hope everything works out there too! :)
 
Thanks Paula and Brandy :) Sorry I don't have much time to write today but I'll try to catch up with everyone soon.


Today I left without breakfast and tried to find the healthiest thing I could in the vending machine because I was starving by noon. Gummy snacks ended up bein it, lol


Today's cals:

Gummy fruit snacks-200cals

Chicken wrap-360cals

Dinner:
2 breaded chicken patties on bread with mayo- 830 cals
baked beans-450

1 hershey's chocolate stick-60 cals

Total-1900
 
:iagree:Yea I try to limit my sugar but I wasn't worried about it yesterday because I could feel that my blood sugar was too low from having not eaten. Just another case of poor planning on my part. I'll get better though with some practice :) Thanks for stoppin by my journal Paperairplanes :hat:
 
So I was starving this morning at work and asked my boss to bring something on her way in. I haven't had fast food much at all lately and definitely not for breakfast. So I got a hashbrown and two breakfast burritos...which should have been enough food but I still want to eat! I'm guessing this is what's meant by trigger foods? And honestly for 750 calories I could have had alot more food so it's time for me to keep a few things at work for emergencies. I had frozen dinners there but I've slowly used them up.

Also, and I'm not sure if this is related but when I left I wanted something sweet and chocolate really bad...dessert. I haven't had a craving like that in a while and I am not a donut fan but a chocolate covered bar with cream filling would have hit the spot and I honestly pulled into "maryanne's" donut drive up.

Ironically they had no chocolate bars left....none. She had vanilla and cherry....and a nasty chocolate cake donut. Guess it was a good thing my craving was specific and I wasn't about to settle so I left. I was actually relieved and I took that as a sign I wasn't supposed to get one. But even then when I got close to home I took a different exit so as to go by the convenience store by my house that also carries those donuts. By that time though I wasn't as commited to getting one and I kept right on going by the store and came home.

Honestly I know what I really need is sleep, not a donut. I even skipped class today and I can tell the amount of studying I have to do this week is starting to overwhelm me. I'm studying and doing classwork but it's EVERY DAY and it never stops. Seriously I just need a break and I'll be SO glad when this semester is DONE.

Anyway a donut isn't going to kill me but seriously it's not worth the calories and beating myself up. If I still want something like that later when I wake up I'll go get something I can actually count the calories and share with my hubby so I'm not left eating all of it.

Food cravings annoy me. I'm so much happier on days I feel in full control. Yesterday I could have cared less about food. Today I'm driving on side routes on the way home for a stinking donut. I don't even LIKE donuts!
 
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Lisa, I used to have that same breakfast 3 out of 5 mornings... add in an XL coke! You could actually get ONE burrito and a coffee or milk and stay okay with calories next time...

Your craving is weird... could have been a trigger craving... Thank goodness the donut you were craving wasn't available and GOOD FOR YOU for not stopping at the NEXT stop to try to find it again! Hopefully you got some sleep and your craving is gone!

Lisa... you are getting sleepy... you are craving carrots and cauliflower... you want to take a bite of a nice, sweet juicy apple.... maybe an orange... your cravings are satisfied by the taste of a fruits and veggies... donuts are nasty... they taste like wax covered chalk... they make you want to puke just thinking of them... :puke:Ha! Hope that helped! ;) Have a great rest of the day! :seeya:
 
LMAO!!!! Paula...I'm cured!!!

I went to bed and had a 6 hour nap, lol. If I was never over tired or stressed I swear I'd be a size 5, lol.
 
Food cravings ...argh...pizza is a big trigger for me...i can go along on my diet doing good, but at sometime i NEED NEED NEEEEEEEEEED PIZZA... I know I can make low fat versions, but when I am tired, and in a hurry and not feeling like cooking its so easy to order one....then usually after one piece my addictive voice says "this pizza really tastes so much better than being thin feels"....it fools me into thinking being heavy is fine...i hate that f'in foodaddictive voice.

hope your day was wonderful........

mine actually was...and thanks for the words in my journal...after a year and 1/2 of greiving I am finally feeling "normal"...life will never be the same, a part of me died on 4/23/07 at 3:00 a.m....but I am giving myself permission to feel good...maybe thats why I finally am feeling good about getting healthy in my eating....i dunno..

sorry..hijack...
 
Hey, Lisa. I've been meaning to stop in and say "HI" :seeya:

Good work on avoiding the donut. Donuts and Pizza are the two real toughies for me. I do what I can to just avoid them all together, because when I don't, look out. :ack2:

Do you work the overnight shift?
 
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