MOTIVATIONS FOR LOSING WEIGHT:
• prevent future health problems.
•
be able to breathe better.
•
sleep better.
•
move better.
•
fit into clothes better.
•
have a sense of accomplishment and control. well, most of the time
•
have more energy.
• be more attractive to other people in general.
• prove to people I can lose weight.
• inspire others to do the same.
•
have a better self-esteem.
•
relieve some of my moodiness, depression or anxiety.
•
make some hard decisions about the course of my life.
•
make my life feel like its going somewhere.
•
have more day-to-day fun.
•
better handle the ups and downs of life.
• be more independent.
• be less critical of myself.
• be more free of doubts and fears.
•
feel more deserving of the good things I have in life.
• shed some of my shyness or discomfort around people.
and reasons why i sabotage myself:
• food is my best friend and I don't think I can give up eating the
way I do.
• I need food to get rid of my negative feelings.
•
food calms me down when I'm angry or frustrated.
•
when I'm lonely food makes me feel better.
•
food is one of the only things that can keep me occupied when I'm
bored.
• since I can't be perfect it feels like there's no point to dieting.
•
it helps me quiet my inner-critic.
• I just love junk food and the feeling it gives me.
•
overeating is the only way I know how to make myself stop feeling
empty inside.
• I am always taking care of everyone and food is my reward.
• I have regrets about my unfulfilled potential and eating helps me
deal with it.
•
food feels like my protection.
• I don't want anybody or anything to stop me from eating what I
want.
•
being overweight is my way of getting back at someone.
•
being overweight makes me feel safe.
• f
ood, or being overweight, excuses me from challenging myself.
• being overweight protects me from unwanted sexual attention.
in good parts i pointed out in red the things that i am already experiencing, and in bad the fears and urges to sabotage myself that are still present although in much less quantity than before.
i know i made progress. and i need to continue to do that. i don't want to fool myself into going back to where i was four months ago. so FOCUS, FOCUS, FOCUS
i know it seems funny i'm like this because of two pieces of cake and some sandwiches, but i don't want to make myself believe like it is ok to do it once and a while. because its not ok. its ok to crave chocolate and eat a small piece of it. its ok to plan ahead your meals. but its not ok for me to overeat just because i+m bored and nervous. Lena you don't need food to comfort you. you gave into it now... but from now tell that FUCKIN WORM TO SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!! (sorry for the language

)