kelly's diary
- Thread starter Happychubette
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Happychubette
Banned
Sunday
Baked peanut butter cookies yesterday for my son while he was studying. Didn't eat fingerfuls of the dough nor chow down on handfuls after they were done like I always did before. Also, first time I've had a sweet in two months, since my "mug of hot chocolate" at Holly's a while back. They don't give me the feelings I want out of them. I had three cookies in all yesterday, the first was the best because I ate it with intent and learned something about moderation. The second was okay too. It would have been better if I'd stopped there but I had a third one late at night when I was tired. The feelings I crave now come from some place other than bingeing.
The change is that there are WAY fewer occasions of sweets (and chips) in the house and that I'm more aware of and avoiding the pain associated with bingeing on handfuls of peanut butter cookie dough and cookies. These are the calories I have left behind.
I do need to eat more veggies. Have been high on the protein and carbs as I reach for filling foods.
Baked peanut butter cookies yesterday for my son while he was studying. Didn't eat fingerfuls of the dough nor chow down on handfuls after they were done like I always did before. Also, first time I've had a sweet in two months, since my "mug of hot chocolate" at Holly's a while back. They don't give me the feelings I want out of them. I had three cookies in all yesterday, the first was the best because I ate it with intent and learned something about moderation. The second was okay too. It would have been better if I'd stopped there but I had a third one late at night when I was tired. The feelings I crave now come from some place other than bingeing.
The change is that there are WAY fewer occasions of sweets (and chips) in the house and that I'm more aware of and avoiding the pain associated with bingeing on handfuls of peanut butter cookie dough and cookies. These are the calories I have left behind.
I do need to eat more veggies. Have been high on the protein and carbs as I reach for filling foods.
Yeah!!! Congrats on your will power! I don't think I could make peanut butter cookies, because I would eat them ALL!!!!
It does sound pretty darn tasty, I love peanut butter cookies.
I don't think cooking for a family should be much different than cooking for our own food plan, though. Maybe some occasional treats, etc, but we really shouldn't be in a massive caloric deficit; we should generally be in a small deficit while the healthier bodies in the family can eat slightly larger portions.
It's tougher if we decide to eat "special foods", I will agree with that, but one of the benefits of learning to eat healthy is being able to teach our kids how to do so as well.
It's definitely possible to eat a normal, healthy diet and lose weight if we have a lot to lose (unlike Kelly!) but learning portion control and retraining our cravings (like Kelly!) is going to make the biggest difference in the long run. I think the feelings you had by the third cookie are just about ideal, and just think about how many times you have had far more than a few hundred calories worth of cookies and then compare your feelings then to your feelings now. You might see that this isn't something to feel bad about, but something to be HAPPY about, Chubette.
I'm thrilled for you, and your change for the better!
I don't think cooking for a family should be much different than cooking for our own food plan, though. Maybe some occasional treats, etc, but we really shouldn't be in a massive caloric deficit; we should generally be in a small deficit while the healthier bodies in the family can eat slightly larger portions.
It's tougher if we decide to eat "special foods", I will agree with that, but one of the benefits of learning to eat healthy is being able to teach our kids how to do so as well.
It's definitely possible to eat a normal, healthy diet and lose weight if we have a lot to lose (unlike Kelly!) but learning portion control and retraining our cravings (like Kelly!) is going to make the biggest difference in the long run. I think the feelings you had by the third cookie are just about ideal, and just think about how many times you have had far more than a few hundred calories worth of cookies and then compare your feelings then to your feelings now. You might see that this isn't something to feel bad about, but something to be HAPPY about, Chubette.
I'm thrilled for you, and your change for the better!
wishes
Coffee Addict
you would be surprised at what you can fit into calories if you take the time to eat MOST of your food healthy
I just got back from a weekend away eating all sorts of fantastic foods, but eating healthy when i wasnt at a function. I still only managed 1300 cals a day, and that includes eating 2 deserts one day (just smaller portions than everyone else)
Funnily enough I had actually though id gone over my calories - but i wasnt overly concerned
I just got back from a weekend away eating all sorts of fantastic foods, but eating healthy when i wasnt at a function. I still only managed 1300 cals a day, and that includes eating 2 deserts one day (just smaller portions than everyone else)
Funnily enough I had actually though id gone over my calories - but i wasnt overly concerned
Last edited:
Cannon 2006
New member
Hey it sounds like you did awesome with the cookies. I have a theory that its healthier to eat one or two than to not eat any. I think avoiding them completely just leads to feeling deprived. Have one or two and move on feeling like you had a little treat and it was neither the high point or low point of your day. I did something similiar today. I love this bakery that is behind my apartment building. I went over there today and got some very tasty treats and then I left them with my mom and step-dad who I thought deserved some attention and somebody doing something nice for them. I did have one cookie. It was tiny. It was tasty. I did something nice for somebody I care about. Life is good.
Happychubette
Banned
caring for somebody
That's awesome Cannon.
Here is my day so far. Had a chance to make some money today by gardening but I just couldn't do it. Even though I was only planning to work for an hour for this lady. Waiting for a nicer day. Work is hard. Hopefully God will grant me some enthusiasm so that I can help myself through the spring when people call me. When I am enthusiastic I am cheerful and happy to be gardening. When I am not, I'm simply slow, take too many breaks and unproductive.
Since I was dressed though I went for a walk for 1 hour 20 minutes. Had some sad feelings along the way and wanted to connect with my forum buddies. Thought how fun it would be to have a reunion of all the forum users.
Working on remembering some good things I am doing for myself. Leaving calories behind, changing my cravings. One day at a time.
I remember when I became happy. I was in the hospital.
I remember slowing down.
I'm just here today. Wish someone would come along to chat.
Love to all the forum people.
That's awesome Cannon.
Here is my day so far. Had a chance to make some money today by gardening but I just couldn't do it. Even though I was only planning to work for an hour for this lady. Waiting for a nicer day. Work is hard. Hopefully God will grant me some enthusiasm so that I can help myself through the spring when people call me. When I am enthusiastic I am cheerful and happy to be gardening. When I am not, I'm simply slow, take too many breaks and unproductive.
Since I was dressed though I went for a walk for 1 hour 20 minutes. Had some sad feelings along the way and wanted to connect with my forum buddies. Thought how fun it would be to have a reunion of all the forum users.
Working on remembering some good things I am doing for myself. Leaving calories behind, changing my cravings. One day at a time.
I remember when I became happy. I was in the hospital.
I remember slowing down.
I'm just here today. Wish someone would come along to chat.
Love to all the forum people.
hello to you too - hope your day is going upwards...
Happychubette
Banned
exhubby
My ex told my seventeen year old son on the phone last Saturday that he's going to be dead in two years.
He must have resorted to this in desperation. He is afraid his son will "screw up" if he doesn't ride him about his homework. The boy is doing fine but its not enough. His dad wants him to do ALL questions in book, not just the six the teacher assigned. I have to think this was a desperate measure to get the boy to study more. Studying is the most important thing to my ex. I have sent the ex an email asking him if he's okay. I doubt he'll reply. I have never emailed him before and can't seem to verbalize with him without getting emotional and freaked out.
He is diabetic and has already outlived both parents. Is spending for the boy on a car, a new computer and an overseas visit to his family this summer. What is going on?
My ex told my seventeen year old son on the phone last Saturday that he's going to be dead in two years.
He must have resorted to this in desperation. He is afraid his son will "screw up" if he doesn't ride him about his homework. The boy is doing fine but its not enough. His dad wants him to do ALL questions in book, not just the six the teacher assigned. I have to think this was a desperate measure to get the boy to study more. Studying is the most important thing to my ex. I have sent the ex an email asking him if he's okay. I doubt he'll reply. I have never emailed him before and can't seem to verbalize with him without getting emotional and freaked out.
He is diabetic and has already outlived both parents. Is spending for the boy on a car, a new computer and an overseas visit to his family this summer. What is going on?
Happychubette
Banned
ex
Well folks, this is getting worse. As I was just emailing my girlfriend in Australia I remembered that there was a younger brother who died overseas from diabetic complications two years ago. No wonder he is acting this way. Intense. I am struck with the feeling this could be for real. I'm off to see our doctor in the morning.
Well folks, this is getting worse. As I was just emailing my girlfriend in Australia I remembered that there was a younger brother who died overseas from diabetic complications two years ago. No wonder he is acting this way. Intense. I am struck with the feeling this could be for real. I'm off to see our doctor in the morning.
Are you saying the ex is dying or he said the son is going to? I'm so sorry you are having to deal with this. I know it can't be very easy!!!
All you can do is be supportive of your son in either situation and deal the best that you can. Good luck at your doctor appt tomorrow.
All you can do is be supportive of your son in either situation and deal the best that you can. Good luck at your doctor appt tomorrow.
Happychubette
Banned
the ex
What I meant is that the ex is afraid he is going to die.
What I meant is that the ex is afraid he is going to die.
Breezyy
New member
*Hugs Happy*
I obviously don't know the entire story but it sounds like your ex is depressed, due to his family illnesses. Or maybe feeling guily. People can say and do crazy things during a depression and it is not fair to the people around them that they hurt. Scaring you or your son probably wasn't his intention but I'm sure thats how it came off. In regards to your son's health since its a family illness its a good idea to keep him checked out too so going to the dr was a great idea and hope it works out for the best. All you can do there is be there for him and be supportive.
A forum reunion would be so fun ! I can imagine all of us in one big room and not being able to quit talking stories after more stores! But what would we have for food?? hehe
Don't be sad, you have accomplished so much and should be proud of yourself. Try making a list of things that are different now then they were a few months ago, feelings you felt then and even physical things. Keep it to yourself if you need and read it everytime you are feeling a little down.
I hope your day tomorrow is better
I obviously don't know the entire story but it sounds like your ex is depressed, due to his family illnesses. Or maybe feeling guily. People can say and do crazy things during a depression and it is not fair to the people around them that they hurt. Scaring you or your son probably wasn't his intention but I'm sure thats how it came off. In regards to your son's health since its a family illness its a good idea to keep him checked out too so going to the dr was a great idea and hope it works out for the best. All you can do there is be there for him and be supportive.
A forum reunion would be so fun ! I can imagine all of us in one big room and not being able to quit talking
stories after more stores! But what would we have for food?? hehe Don't be sad, you have accomplished so much and should be proud of yourself. Try making a list of things that are different now then they were a few months ago, feelings you felt then and even physical things. Keep it to yourself if you need and read it everytime you are feeling a little down.
I hope your day tomorrow is better
Two things:
First, for there to be a RE-union, we would have to be doing it AGAIN!
We could still have a gathering of some kind without hurting my feelings, any.
Second, diabetes sucks, but if you take time to take care of yourself, it is something that can be easily controlled for a very long time. If it is Type 1, then it is more difficult and has more impacts, but it can still be kept from having serious side effects for most of a person's life... as long as they keep their weight (and a few other issues) controlled.
To be clear, did the ex say that your son was going to die in two years, or was he informing your son that he (the ex) was going to be dead in two years?
In either case, I'd definitely want to find out what brings him to that conclusion, because doctors told me I wouldn't be diabetic for another 10 years or so, and they were about 70% off in that guesstimation. In the wrong direction, unfortunately.
First, for there to be a RE-union, we would have to be doing it AGAIN!
We could still have a gathering of some kind without hurting my feelings, any.
Second, diabetes sucks, but if you take time to take care of yourself, it is something that can be easily controlled for a very long time. If it is Type 1, then it is more difficult and has more impacts, but it can still be kept from having serious side effects for most of a person's life... as long as they keep their weight (and a few other issues) controlled.
To be clear, did the ex say that your son was going to die in two years, or was he informing your son that he (the ex) was going to be dead in two years?
In either case, I'd definitely want to find out what brings him to that conclusion, because doctors told me I wouldn't be diabetic for another 10 years or so, and they were about 70% off in that guesstimation. In the wrong direction, unfortunately.
Happychubette
Banned
diabetic ex
It sounded like the ex was expecting to die in two years.
He replied to my email that he meant "a couple 10,15 years", so he is going to set the record straight with the boys. That is the first time I"ve emailed him in over twelve years of divorce. I've been afraid to. He is very old school from another country. Apparently he does see a heart specialist. I hope he's taking his meds.
So that worry is off. For now.
Back to me...me me me me me. I could have sworn the scale said 189 this morning. I kept looking and looking, bending over, no, was that just a shadow? Anyway, I'll see if its there tomorrow. If so, that was a three week pound, which would be awesome.
I read an article about Jann Arden (any of you heard of her?) who recently lost 50 pounds. She said she didn't have an epiphany, rather it was a bunch of little things that piled up that led to her weight loss. She's a Canadian singer in case you don't know. I like that.
It sounded like the ex was expecting to die in two years.
He replied to my email that he meant "a couple 10,15 years", so he is going to set the record straight with the boys. That is the first time I"ve emailed him in over twelve years of divorce. I've been afraid to. He is very old school from another country. Apparently he does see a heart specialist. I hope he's taking his meds.
So that worry is off. For now.
Back to me...me me me me me. I could have sworn the scale said 189 this morning. I kept looking and looking, bending over, no, was that just a shadow? Anyway, I'll see if its there tomorrow. If so, that was a three week pound, which would be awesome.
I read an article about Jann Arden (any of you heard of her?) who recently lost 50 pounds. She said she didn't have an epiphany, rather it was a bunch of little things that piled up that led to her weight loss. She's a Canadian singer in case you don't know. I like that.
I'm glad you'll get some relief, then.
And congrats on the 189!
And.. and... What else about you?
What's wrong with it being about you? It was your diary last time I looked!
You you you you you! Yep, keep up the good work, and don't forget to beat those kids; it can be great exercise running to catch them! I recommend the "rolled up newspaper" implement of destruction.
And congrats on the 189!
And.. and... What else about you?
What's wrong with it being about you? It was your diary last time I looked!
You you you you you! Yep, keep up the good work, and don't forget to beat those kids; it can be great exercise running to catch them! I recommend the "rolled up newspaper" implement of destruction.
Happychubette
Banned
child abuse
lol. I'll have to give them a rougher time.
Today I WENT BACK TO MY AEROBICS GROUP!!!
This computer is sucking the life out of me. I used to do things. Now I just sit here.
No weight change.
lol. I'll have to give them a rougher time.
Today I WENT BACK TO MY AEROBICS GROUP!!!
This computer is sucking the life out of me. I used to do things. Now I just sit here.
No weight change.
Hey Kelly, I have found that I spend way too much time on here as well. The major exercise I am getting is the finger exercise and the eye movement from reading. I need to start making some sort of deal where I exercise for 5 minutes for every so many minutes I'm on here... hmmmmmm.. need to think about that..