I agree with LJ. Keep your eye on the social media accounts. I didn't realize what happens at 13,14 or 15 until my wife worked in a Junior High.
It's quite frightening. haha!
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This may get long...
Today has been an odd day. Not the best mood wise, but I talked to a couple friends today, and that helped a little bit. I don't talk to them nearly as often as I would like. So, just chatting with them for a few minutes to catch up was nice. We all have kids and husbands, and other stuff that keeps us busy. My one friend is done with her chemo treatments and will have a scan in March to see if they worked. If not, they'll most likely do surgery. She said her tumor is gone(as far as she can feel anyway), so hopefully that's a good sign. Fingers crossed that it worked! My other friend sounds like she's doing pretty good. They both got a good laugh out of the "boyfriend" situation. lol!
I've had a few things triggering my anxiety in the last couple days. One of them is my online "friend" that I pissed off a few months back. She's made it a point to "like" a bunch of stupid quotes on facebook to try and provoke a fight. From the content of the quotes you can tell they're directed at me. It's super obvious. It's irritating, and I refuse to play her childish little game. All she wants is someone to sit there and pat her on the back and tell her she's right and everyone else is at fault, even though the majority of her problems she's brought on herself. She's had a million problems over the years and amazingly not one of them has been her fault...
ever! Not one thing she's done has contributed to her life falling apart on a near daily basis.
I'm just done with it. It's mentally exhausting.
Other things that have contributed to my anxiety:
- School stuff with the kids. Exams are coming up. I don't know if I ever said, but back when I had the meeting for my son. We decided that we would try taking him out of special education for math and putting him back into general education. So he hasn't been pulled out for math in quite a while. Right now he has an A- in math!!! He's doing very good. He's super proud of himself and so happy that he's only being pulled out for reading now. My stress is that he has an exam coming up, and it's going to be a rough one. Lots of problems where you have to explain how you came up with your answer. The actual math part he has no problem with, but explaining how he got his answer is extremely difficult. The language part of math is what trips him up. Word problems, explaining steps taken, or "explain how you found this to be true" are all tough for him. I'm nervous. If he bombs this test he's going to take it hard. I don't want to see him lose any of the confidence he's gained, or worse, them try to use it as an excuse to start pulling him again.
- I've also been working through some pretty bad body confidence issues. I feel like crap about myself and how I'm looking these days. I've been eating to make myself feel better. A tad bit counter productive you say? ...Mmm hmm. You are correct.
Sigh.
- I have a million and one things I should be doing during the day and I'm doing squat. My time management skills are poor. Ridiculously poor. I really need to work on it, because it's one of my big stress inducers. I feel like I should be doing a million things and I get overwhelmed. Then instead of focusing, I just say to hell with it and do nothing. Cuz that makes sense, right?
I need a schedule. I've said this a million times, but I need to make one and actually follow it.
- Winter. I hate winter. I hate driving in it(It's a big anxiety trigger for me). I hate that there is no sun. I hate the cold. I hate damn near every single thing about it. I'm done with it. Come on, Spring!
- I'm not pregnant. Thought for sure I was this last month, but nope. I was four days late, which is extremely odd for me, and then mother nature came and was extra cruel when she showed up. It was weird and I wish I would of tested earlier. Lots of tears were shed over that one.
I could probably think of some more, but that's enough for now. I needed a good vent. Just writing stuff out helps sometimes.
My calories have not been good the last couple days, but I did get on the treadmill for a little bit yesterday. I'm not sure how long it actually was, because I stopped when the shooting pain in my hip became unbearable. I'm going to do it again tomorrow though. I'll try to remember to put my Fitbit on tomorrow too. I totally forgot today until 4 o'clock, and then I was like heck with it. Yesterday I put it on, and then didn't realize until quite a bit later that it had died. Then it wouldn't sync, so I had to mess around with that for a while. Not having much luck with the Fitbit this week. lol!
I really need to get back on track, make a schedule, and quit worrying about things I can't control.
I'll end this on a good note... I have a wonderful husband. We may drive each other crazy sometimes, but I don't know what I'd do without him. He always manages to find the right words.
I think my parents felt the same way when none of us were dating by the time we were 20...
