Janvier's Weight loss Diary

[chubbygirl]

Hey Janvier happy hump day! Well it didn't start too happy but I'm getting there and haven't given in to any cravings yet today so that is good! I fell pretty hard the last couple days - more emotionally than anything - I think I've done some damage to my weight too but nothing I can't fix in a week! I love the thought of an office crush! Must make you want to look nice everyday! Usually taking the time in your appearance means you will back it up with what you eat too! When I am feeling my best it's on the inside and out! I love it that more people are stopping by your diary!! Your very inspiring and motivating so you need to post daily if you can! We all love to hear how good you are doing or how many calories you are burning when you slip up a bit!! You really know how to bust a sweat on that stair stepper! Glad you had a good weekend - it sounded much healthier than mine!

 

[Janvier]

Hey there!! Thanks for stopping by, your support means a lot. I'm having a "skinny" day today...lol. I feel great I love stopping by your journal, besides the obvious fact that your and inspiration to me, but also because being from Canada as well, I'm actually familiar with the food you're eating...lol. Seems strange to say, but it's good to see healthy choices that I can find at the grocery store I hope you had a great day.

Hi Skinny,

I'm glad to hear that you were having a skinny day yesterday lol, I've been trying hard to have a skinny week this week. Thank you so much for considering me an inspiration, that means the world to me, you have no idea! I know exactly what you mean about the familiar foods, I love seeing what healthy food choices people make because it gives you good ideas for your own meals that you wouldn't of thought of eating. Thank you for checking up on me, I hope your having a skinny day today as well, I'm going to check your diary shortly!

 

[Janvier]

Hey Janvier, just stopped by to say hi!!! I hope you have a great week.... Although I'm sure you will. And what's up with this office crush??????? (you must tell more) Any who.......Have a great week!

Hi Mrskt20,

Thank you for checking up on me! Its always good to hear from you. I have been doing well this week, I'm glad that I am because I needed to recover from over eating on the weekend. So I'll fill you in on my office crush ... So he works on my floor, I met him while I was with my ex, so didn't think too much of him-thought he was cute and funny but it didn't matter because I had a bf and I was 60 pounds heavier so assumed no one would ever find me attractive anyway. He is not really my typical type- I usually like really tall, big masculin looking guys- He is tall, but on the skinny side, I would say he is inbetween fit and skinny...I think I usually liked bigger guys because I was a big girl and being with a skinny guy would just make me look even bigger, so I am trying to adjust to the fact that I am not that girl anymore. So he is tall, slim, blonde hair, blue eyes, truly adorible, Very funny-which I love- and has such an out going and likeable personality! He plays hockey-I love athletic and is just a great guy. I started to think about him in a crush way when my work friend mentioned that he is always asking her about me, and commenting on how good I look after the weight loss...I didn't really buy it because I am still struggling to accept that anyone would ever find me attractive...She wants to set us up but I told her that I am really not sure...I feel that on top of my inability to accept my new identity, I am a painfully shy person and I am also still struggling with being so affected by my break-up. I am very ready to get back out there, get over the past and start dating, but I was with my ex from ages 16-22, he was my only relationship and I really missed out on getting any dating experience and know that I will be extreamly awkward on a date. Tomorrow is our potluck so I will get to spend some time with him weekly now, and I am hoping that will help me to open up a bit and get over my shyness...I guess time will tell...keep your fingers crossed for me! I am still not sure if I should accept my friend's help in setting us up yet, I will keep you updated for sure!

 

[Janvier]

Hey Janvier happy hump day! Well it didn't start too happy but I'm getting there and haven't given in to any cravings yet today so that is good! I fell pretty hard the last couple days - more emotionally than anything - I think I've done some damage to my weight too but nothing I can't fix in a week! I love the thought of an office crush! Must make you want to look nice everyday! Usually taking the time in your appearance means you will back it up with what you eat too! When I am feeling my best it's on the inside and out! I love it that more people are stopping by your diary!! Your very inspiring and motivating so you need to post daily if you can! We all love to hear how good you are doing or how many calories you are burning when you slip up a bit!! You really know how to bust a sweat on that stair stepper! Glad you had a good weekend - it sounded much healthier than mine!

Hi Lisa! Its good to talk to you!

I'm sorry that your week started out so rocky, I have been there too many times, But I know how capable you are of bouncing back, rocking your workouts, being super positive and getting back to your routine. I have so much faith in you! I even when you have your slip ups I still admire you and still always always find motivation in your posts. This journey is so emotional and sooo overwhelming sometimes that we will cave, this is going to be a life long struggle for us, but you will get through it, and when you do cave you have so many people here to cheer you on and support you. Your totally right, its nothing you can't fix and You will be back to yourself soon, don't worry!

It is so exciting to have my office crush! Or a crush in general! It feels so good to have butterflies again because I never thought I would ever know what that feeling felt like again, so its a big deal for me, even if nothing ever comes out of it, it will still be good to know that it is possible to have those feelings again. lol, I really have been putting a little extra thought into my appearence, trying to look my best, and your right, I have been wanting to eat better and work harder to start feeling like I can look good.

Thank you so much for considering me insiring and motivating, That really does mean so much to me! Its been great having new people visit me, its so motivating to keep trying my best. I am going to work on posting daily, work had been so crazy, but I need to put my weight loss first and posting really does help me stay on track. I hope you feel better soon, I'm going to you a little note on your diary.

 

[Janvier]

My resposes have been so long so I will update on Yesterday since and didnt get a chance and as well as today, but I will keep it short.

Yesterday (Tuesday)

Everything went well, I ate well all day...left work a little early so I could get a nap in before the BL because I got very little sleep on Monday, So I had dinner and took a 2 hour nap, I woke up with an annoying need to eat some of the left over b-day cake from my moms birthday- I wasn't even craving it, I don't even think it tastes good, I just knew it was there and wanted some...my parent's house has way too many temptations...so two minutes before the BL started I had about 4 fork fulls of the cake before I called it quits and ran to catch the BL theme song, I love that song, its so motivating. I went on my stepper for the last hour and a half of the BL and burned 1235 calories. I did a lot of crying during that episode, I swear there hasn't been one episode that I have been able not to cry yet. After it was over I had such an urge to try running around the block- probably from all of the running they did on the show- at this point it was 10pm which I actually liked since I don't have the courage to run in day light yet...I put a sweater over my workout clothes and was almost out the door when my mom decided to talk me out of it because it was late...lately she has been so overwhelmingly over protective and it was so irritating because I was so energetic and so excited to try the run and she kind of rained on my parade...so I didn't do anything else for my workout like I planned, changed my clothes and went home. I wish I didn't have to spend so much time at my parent's house but I workout there because they have so much more room to workout there- I have a gym in my building and I think I need to start getting up before work to go to it and take a break from her. I was happy I atleast did the stepper but I went home unhappy and took a box of cereal to bed with my to feel better and ended up deciding not to eat it because I truly wasn't hungry and read one of my new fitness magazines instead until I fell asleep.

Today is going well, I am sticking to my meals and plan to workout after work...I haven't decided if I'm going to get to my parents house or not yet...either way I need to not let this steer me away from getting my workouts in. Here is what today is like:

Breakfast: ff yogurt and 3/4 of dry honey nut cheerios

Snack: apple

Lunch: Uncle Bens Bistro Express

Snack: banana

Dinner: Lean cusine, sauteed cabbage and steamed veggies

Workout: Undecided

I hope your all having a good week...I'm sorry I lied about this post being short lol

 

[mrskt20]

Hey Janvier,
Thanks for the info on the office crush. I think you should take the next couple of weeks to hang around him a little bit more during the office potlucks and if that goes well you should let your friend set you up (if you're ready). It may be fun!
Great job on your eating and exercising lately. I haven't been doing that bad but I am so ready to start back exercising. Have a great Wednesday! TTYL....

 

[njoyabl]

Hey, great to hear that you are doing so good! I find that stopping by your diary helps to keep me going being as we are the same height and started at the same weight. My goal weight is higher than yours though, I tend to look smaller than what I weigh, and at 130, I was a size 5, and that is kool by me! Anyway, you are so detailed and then you throw in some enjoyment like your crush.

Not that you were asking for it, but if you even think about it, it may be a good idea. Hanging around your crush for a while at work when you have your pot lucks, and then getting in a little conversation, feel around a little bit, see what he is about, try to minimize the awkwardness. Then you will find that you will actually be hooking yourself up. I don't like the whole third party thing of letting friends hook you up because that can be a little annoying and misinformative. If you do it like this, yourself, you will find that you will get to know alot more, and see if you actually want to take it anywhere, even if it is just friendship or whatever. Good luck!

 

[chubbygirl]

Hi Lisa! Its good to talk to you!

I'm sorry that your week started out so rocky, I have been there too many times, But I know how capable you are of bouncing back, rocking your workouts, being super positive and getting back to your routine. I have so much faith in you! I hope you feel better soon, I'm going to you a little note on your diary.

Thanks Janvier! That post was so special to me! thanks for having faith and supporting me - it helps so much more than you know!! I am so happy to say I had a great day yesterday and plan to continue strong for the next week! I will also promise to post all my eating and exercise from the weekend so I make sure to track and stay accountable - I think that will really help!

I did a lot of crying during that episode, I swear there hasn't been one episode that I have been able not to cry yet. After it was over I had such an urge to try running around the block- probably from all of the running they did on the show- at this point it was 10pm which I actually liked since I don't have the courage to run in day light yet...I put a sweater over my workout clothes and was almost out the door when my mom decided to talk me out of it because it was late...lately she has been so overwhelmingly over protective and it was so irritating because I was so energetic and so excited to try the run and she kind of rained on my parade...so I didn't do anything else for my workout like I planned, changed my clothes and went home.

I always cry too and this past week I had a friend over and was too embarassed to cry in front of him so I had to try and not pay attention to a lot of it because I always get so choked up!
About the running - your mom might have been right - I would have been worried about you too! There are so many gangs and beatings happening around where I live to just random people minding their own business and walking by themselves - I would hate to think of something like that happening to you - I know we live far away from each other but when it gets dark people go crazy so be careful - sorry if I sound like your mom! I do understand the frustration of planning to do something and then having to change plans. I think you still got an amazing work out in!!1235 cals burned is probably how much you ate that day!! Maybe try running in the early morning if you are too afraid to go when everyone is out and about - I would think it would be safer then but who knows really!
Have a great day - you are rocking it this week!!

 

[njoyabl]

Just stopping by and wanted to let you know......Whew, that I am finally going to try this stair stepper that you do so much! I will post my first time opinion of the beast tomorrow. Wish me luck!

 

[Janvier]

Hey Janvier,
Thanks for the info on the office crush. I think you should take the next couple of weeks to hang around him a little bit more during the office potlucks and if that goes well you should let your friend set you up (if you're ready). It may be fun!
Great job on your eating and exercising lately. I haven't been doing that bad but I am so ready to start back exercising. Have a great Wednesday! TTYL....

Hi Mrskt20,

Thank you for the advice! I think I agree with you about haning around him a bit first. Today was the pot luck, I talked with him a bit, hes much cuter then I even remember lol. I feel a little discouraged because I feel like he wouldn't be interested in me...I need to work on my self-asteem. Thank you for your encouragement, I'm looking forward to your recovery to lose this weight together!

 

[Janvier]

Hey, great to hear that you are doing so good! I find that stopping by your diary helps to keep me going being as we are the same height and started at the same weight. My goal weight is higher than yours though, I tend to look smaller than what I weigh, and at 130, I was a size 5, and that is kool by me! Anyway, you are so detailed and then you throw in some enjoyment like your crush.

Not that you were asking for it, but if you even think about it, it may be a good idea. Hanging around your crush for a while at work when you have your pot lucks, and then getting in a little conversation, feel around a little bit, see what he is about, try to minimize the awkwardness. Then you will find that you will actually be hooking yourself up. I don't like the whole third party thing of letting friends hook you up because that can be a little annoying and misinformative. If you do it like this, yourself, you will find that you will get to know alot more, and see if you actually want to take it anywhere, even if it is just friendship or whatever. Good luck!

Hi Njoyabl,

I think 130 lbs and size 5 is an amazing goal! You will be looking hott! I think any weight that you are comfortable at is a good idea. I'm not sure what body type you have but you may be an even smaller size at 130 lbs, I would say my body is an hour glass and at 127 I wear size 2, so you never know. Thank you so much for your advice with my crush, I think its a great idea to try it on my own. I agree that my friend setting us up can be a little weird so I'm going to try to work up the courage to talk to him more and do things myself. I'm so excited to hear that your going to try the stair stepper! You can totally do it and I think you will like it! It works you hard and you burn some big calories on it. Good luck, my fingers will be crossed for you so keep me updated!

 

[Janvier]

I always cry too and this past week I had a friend over and was too embarassed to cry in front of him so I had to try and not pay attention to a lot of it because I always get so choked up!
About the running - your mom might have been right - I would have been worried about you too! There are so many gangs and beatings happening around where I live to just random people minding their own business and walking by themselves - I would hate to think of something like that happening to you - I know we live far away from each other but when it gets dark people go crazy so be careful - sorry if I sound like your mom! I do understand the frustration of planning to do something and then having to change plans. I think you still got an amazing work out in!!1235 cals burned is probably how much you ate that day!! Maybe try running in the early morning if you are too afraid to go when everyone is out and about - I would think it would be safer then but who knows really!
Have a great day - you are rocking it this week!!

Hi Lisa,

Supporting eachother means a lot to me too! You have helped me through a lot of rough patches. I am so glad to hear that you had a good day yesterday! I knew you would be able to turn your week around. And the weekend is coming up, we need to work hard to stay strong through it- I think its a great idea for you to log all of your food and excersice from the weekend to stay accountable.

I wouldn't of been able to cry over the BL in front of a friend either, its so emotional because we understand their joys and struggles of weight loss, it would be hard for someone who isn't trying to lose weight to fully understand that. Thank you for your advice on the running, I completley understand what your saying about it being dangerous, your such a good friend! I'm going to take your advice this weekend and try getting up early for my run, it will at least be bright, but still early enough for not too many people to be out, great advice! Thank you and thank you for your constant support!

 

[Janvier]

Yesterday went great! I stuck to my meals, went home and took a nap after dinner and woke up pretty cranky...I wasn't at all in the mood to workout, I was really in the mood to eat something crappy- not that I was at all hungry- I just felt like I wanted something to feed my mood. But I resisted changed into workout clothes and decided to try and do at least the stair stepper for at least 30 minutes- At frist I was really half-assing it, but I thought if I'm already on it I might as well try to burn as many calories as I can in the 30 minutes. I started watching tv and before you know it I was on there for 85 minutes! I burned 1085 calories and felt SO much better! I was glad that I pushed myself.

Today is going well, it was my work "pot luck"- in quotations because we had pizza, what kind of healthy pot luck is that??? Anyway, I really wasn't in the mood for pizza but had one slice, which was really yummy but I could of lived without it. I was stufffed. I looked up the nutritional facts and it was 241 calories per slice which isn't bad if you only have one slice but 10g of fat!!! In one slice??? I could of definitley lived without that! But I'm glad I stuck to one slice and will just have to burn off that fat later. Things with my crush were fine, he came to get me when we were leaving, we talked a little, but it was a group setting so it was just a bit of small talk. He is so much cuter then I thought he was lol, but I don't know...I just don't think he would be interested...I guess only time will tell. Anyway, here is what today looks like:

Breakfast: ff yogurt and 1 cup if mango chunks and large coffee with skim and splenda

Snack: None to save myself from over eating at lunch

Lunch: 1 slice of pizza with feta, sundried tomatos, chicken and pepers

Snack: cucumber slices

Dinner: Lean cusine, sauteed cabbage and steamed veggies

Workout: Turbo jam and maybe a few laps (walking) around the track or stair stepper

This week has been going well for me dispite me being a tad grumpy and I am really hoping to see a little change on the scale for my weigh-in tomorrow. I am also really really hoping to continue to do well through out the weekend. Happy Thursday everyone!

 

[juni]

Hi Janvier,

I have seen your posts and have always wanted to come and read your journal. That's what I did today! You have had such an amazing journey. Congratulations. I loved reading about your journey (and your crush!!- so cute). I will be dropping by often to see how you are doing and to get motivation. You're doing great! Good luck with the rest of the week.

 

[chubbygirl]

I wasn't at all in the mood to workout, I was really in the mood to eat something crappy- not that I was at all hungry- I just felt like I wanted something to feed my mood.

Thank you for helping me turn my week around!!
something to feed my mood - that totally hit home! That is always what I am doing! Especially when I'm cranky and upset with the way I look or feel - I feed my mood! I've never thought about it that way before but I'm going to keep running that thought through my head so next time I sense it happening I can take a step back and realize what I'm doing and make a better choice to turn my mood around!
I loved reading about your crush and give yourself some credit! You are a total catch - smart, HOT, excellent personality, active, healthy, friendly, honest and compassionate - he is totally into you and if he isn't he's gay. He wouldn't spend any time asking about you or coming by your desk to get you or even talking to you much if he wasn't interested! Even if you don't want your friend to set you up it doesn't hurt for her to mention that you are interested - sometimes when you get two shy people together they need a little push! he might be too shy to ask you and you are too shy to ask him so if she mentioned you have been asking about him or wondering if he was single - that might just be the little push he needs. I understand not wanting it to be awkward so I do suggest waiting a little longer but in a couple weeks if he hasn't asked you on a date I would get her to drop some hints - small ones though!
Are you counting down the sleeps till Vegas? I might be going to Calgary next weekend to visit my sisters so I'm pretty excited about that. I haven't changed since they saw me last (xmas) but I'm hoping it will give me more motivation once I get back to work really hard till the wedding so they are surprised in August when they see me. My sister has some clothes she was going to give to good will that I told her to hold off on because it's all size 8's and mediums so some of it might fit - yay!
Have a great healthy weekend and I hope to make you proud come Monday! I'm going to try my best and remember all the good tips I've learned! I know you can do it too! Have a good one!!

 

[njoyabl]

Hey Janvier,

You are probably right, I had it wrong, I was a 5/6 at 137, but I was incredibly toned, shoot, I'll be there in no time, with patience of course and consistency. I am only 10 pounds from my first goal, and I visit the site every weekday to keep me in check.

Okay, so yesterday my legs began to get sore midway through the day from the total body of the Hip Hop Abs the night before, but I was still determined to give the stair stepper, master whatever a try. (That machine just looks scary). Well as I started, I could feel the soreness of my legs kicking my butt, but I continued up to 10 minutes. Girl!!! I was sweating bullets, you hear me, B-U-L-L-E-T-S!!! And that started like 3 minutes into it. I was surprised to be able to last that long. No doubt if my legs weren't already sore I could have gone for more. So, given my situation before hand, I still would have to say that the stair stepper is one heck of a workout. I have never used a machine that broke a sweat out of me the way that one did, and I feel that if I continue, it would be very beneficial to my weightloss (CONVINCED). So, I was too sore to even do the eliptical. Today, I'm giving it a rest, and plan to be in the gym early saturday morning, and me and that stair stepper are going to begin getting intimate, lol.

Thanks Janvier.

 

[Janvier]

I loved reading about your crush and give yourself some credit! You are a total catch - smart, HOT, excellent personality, active, healthy, friendly, honest and compassionate - he is totally into you and if he isn't he's gay.

Hi Lisa,

Thank you so much for the confidence boost, it means a lot to me. You are so sweet to think that of me. LOL, I love that if hes not into me hes gay. During the work health challenge meeting he mentioned that he doesn't eat a lot of fruits or veggies and and we need to eat 5 servings a day for the challenge so I decided to bring him an apple yesterday...it took a lot of convincing to go over to him and give it to him, but once I did I felt so much better, he makes everything so funny and easy. He was thankful. I hope it shows him even a little that I was thinking of him. I am really starting to like him, I'm just not sure how he feels about me. I asked my work friend to see what she can find out without just asking him straight out, I feel like I want to know if I have a chance before I like him anymore.

I am kind of counting down the sleeps until Vegas, I am really wanting to get my body in shape so I am thankful that its not until July.

Calgary should be a fun trip, especially since you will be getting your sisters clothes, I think once you put them on and they fit you are going to feel so good about yourself, you will be looking so great!

Thank you for your great advice and support Lisa!

 

[njoyabl]

Hey Janvier,

You are probably right, I had it wrong, I was a 5/6 at 137, but I was incredibly toned, shoot, I'll be there in no time, with patience of course and consistency. I am only 10 pounds from my first goal, and I visit the site every weekday to keep me in check.

Okay, so yesterday my legs began to get sore midway through the day from the total body of the Hip Hop Abs the night before, but I was still determined to give the stair stepper, master whatever a try. (That machine just looks scary). Well as I started, I could feel the soreness of my legs kicking my butt, but I continued up to 10 minutes. Girl!!! I was sweating bullets, you hear me, B-U-L-L-E-T-S!!! And that started like 3 minutes into it. I was surprised to be able to last that long. No doubt if my legs weren't already sore I could have gone for more. So, given my situation before hand, I still would have to say that the stair stepper is one heck of a workout. I have never used a machine that broke a sweat out of me the way that one did, and I feel that if I continue, it would be very beneficial to my weightloss (CONVINCED). So, I was too sore to even do the eliptical. Today, I'm giving it a rest, and plan to be in the gym early saturday morning, and me and that stair stepper are going to begin getting intimate, lol.

Thanks Janvier.

I just realized, it looks like I put my own diary entry in your diary! LOL! I didn't mean to get so personal and run on! My brain runs away from me sometimes. I hope you have been doing well, I'm sure you've been kicking butt with your workouts.

 

[chubbygirl]

Hey I was thinking about you on my drive home yesterday and realized we didn't get a Monday update from you - glad to hear from you today!
I love it that you brought him an apple and I know it probably took a lot because you are so shy - that is so cute and I bet he loved it! I'm so happy your confidence is rising! That is huge!
We have lots of time till July to bust some butt and get in tip top shape and I know we can do it!! I started doing some planks last night and hope to keep them up every night because my tummy is my biggest eye sore when looking in the mirror. I'm sure you will be writing more so I will wait and comment again!

 

[Janvier]

Okay, so yesterday my legs began to get sore midway through the day from the total body of the Hip Hop Abs the night before, but I was still determined to give the stair stepper, master whatever a try. (That machine just looks scary). Well as I started, I could feel the soreness of my legs kicking my butt, but I continued up to 10 minutes. Girl!!! I was sweating bullets, you hear me, B-U-L-L-E-T-S!!! And that started like 3 minutes into it. I was surprised to be able to last that long. No doubt if my legs weren't already sore I could have gone for more. So, given my situation before hand, I still would have to say that the stair stepper is one heck of a workout. I have never used a machine that broke a sweat out of me the way that one did, and I feel that if I continue, it would be very beneficial to my weightloss (CONVINCED). So, I was too sore to even do the eliptical. Today, I'm giving it a rest, and plan to be in the gym early saturday morning, and me and that stair stepper are going to begin getting intimate, lol.

Thanks Janvier.

Njoyabl I am so proud of you for trying the stepper, you have no idea! You did so great! And I am so impressed that you kept going even though your legs were aching. I'm sure they were aching from all of those squats that Shaun T makes us do- I've been there lol. Isn't it crazy how fast it makes the sweat start? I guess thats why it burns so many calories so quickly. I totally agree that it will be really beneficial to your weight-loss. I am beyond proud of you. Keep working at it, you will love the results.