Helllllllo

Awh thank you my lovelies for the kindest replies ever.

It was a big deal for me to admit this secret of mine, it burdens me everyday. Its weird because if i had the chance, and could be with him, i wouldn't. His friends are horrible and when i was in his company a few times he mocked people that were fat and obese. Yet even though i don't ACTUALLY want to be with him, i still have a huge crush on him. I haven't gone on his twitter/facebook yet in the last day and a half...........thank god!!!!! The longest i lasted not going on his twit and fb before was 1 month and a half i think! I think the reason why it has taken me so long to get over it is due to the fact that i have never ever wanted to get over it, until now.......but its going to be hard work,and i am ready for it. #godpleasehelpme haha
Anyway you guessed it, after my emotional ordeal yesterday and confession, i ate booooooold. So bold that i didn't give a toss how many cals was in a certain amount of chocolate cakes :/ Today, on a brighter note, i have consumed 1245 cals, happy happy days!! Like Ruth, i want to have 6 perfect days
Me and my sister were looking at pics from 08 summer, 09 christmas, 11 christmas, i was alot thinner in 08, but i didnt own a scales tho so can't tell you the number, oh my god, in jan of 2010 i was huuuuuuuuuuuge. I say a good 18.5 stone at least. Again now i am just guessing as i didn't own a scales back then. My sister and i were both in hysterics, because back then, i honestly thought i LOOKED HOT, like i seriously thought i looked good. The fattest part of me was my face and ams, so weird............
Anyway folks, hope i can have another good day tomorrow..oh what am i kidding, of course i can

peace out
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
I know
sunflower, crushes are shocking. i am so jealous of you and your boyfriend, ye sound major cute

The thing is girly, i dont even have him added on facebook, i just go on to his page.....his is public. But you're totally right. i need to STOP going on his profile, and start living my life

Thanks a mill hun xxxxxx
Thanks so much
Ruth, yeah this crush is a total waste of time.He is not even goodlooking, oh my god, if ye saw him ye would mock the hell outta me.........basically he's no Brad Pitt( even though he thinks he's a major hottie) Yes your right, him showing off with his gf = PRICK. Yeah but our parents do get along which is worse, anyway you are so right.........prick prick prick, who needs em? NOT ME
Awh
Lucy you big sweetie pie, thank you so much for sharing your experience

I am so sorry you had to hear that guy saying horrible stuff about you, that must have been the most hurtful thing in the world. Its never easy hearing something negative about yourself from someone you hold in the highest regard. I am so sorry it took an such an effect on you, what a douche... lets go baaaaaaaate him, ah but seriously, for that to wreak your life for 6 months..........i just want to give you a big massive hug. You are stunning, and such a nice girl

You are totally right, that sums up everything lucy, because i do(DID) admire him from afar, and i completely build him up in my head. I mean at one stage, i thought he was jesus. I know people will laugh at that, but what i mean was i thought he was this amazing kind guy, heart full of gold, but he wasn't and even though i saw first hand that he wasn't i still believed my view of him more, if that makes any sense? You are totally right, i have to find a way that i can seperate myself from him, like for legit. I am so envious of you and your marriage. It has always been my dream to get married to the man of my dreams and have a big family. I'll be honest lucy, i was waiting for that, but your message has totally waked me up.......... i can't believe you wrote all that and you only woke up??your mad girly haha... i hate typing haha!! Seriously Lucy, thanks so much for the best advice, i am so grateful


You have such a kind heart xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Haha oh
Greg, would ya stop!! Your advice is just as good as any

Thank u so much for your post...made me smile!!


Awh so sorry to hear that your highschool years were hard, i have never heard of that show, but can imagine how it must have felt. I've watched loads of american teenage films and tv programmes and if you weren't the rich jock guy, or the popular skinny girl, life was hard. In Ireland, even though we have bullying and discrimination, it is nothing to that extent!! That is so true Greg, i shouldnt solidify myself to JUST one person, and he's a complete dickhead, oh i wish ye could all see who i have this major crush on, ye would be shocked. That offereing chewing gum is the cutest story ever i bet everyone thought you were lovely for that

Aw thanks sweetie, i know BILLIONS of people in this world, that are kinder and much better looking than this dweeb, i should think outside the box from now on, i am so annoying that way. I always confine myself to the most limited of choices. Thanks so much Greg, you and lucy shared your experieces and ye have made me see that there is, in fact, a light at the end of the tunnel

