Kind of down today… I am not sure why.
Well maybe I do know. Can I just say that sometimes I wonder why I befriend the people I do? Sat night, my “friend” and I got all dolled up to go downtown to have a good time and drink some brewskys. Anyways, I ended up being DD which was totally cool with me because I wasn’t in the mood to drink…. So my friend got TRASHED and acted like a total idiot.. but whatever you do that when you drink sometimes. Anways, the next day, once she was sober, she and I were texting. She says, did you see our pictures I posted on facebook. I said yah aha… they are pretty ridiculous. She says.. ya… I didn’t wanna tell you… but you didn’t look that great. Your hair.. well I wasn’t a fan of it at all…. But I didn’t say anything because you would have gone home.
I am thinking to myself… then why the hell did she say I looked hot when I got there to meet her to go out? And why is she saying this to me now???? Its just bizarre… how freakin rude can you get. I mean if I think you look ridiculous.. ill tell you.. not lie and say hey you look great… go out all night, and then confess the next day you looked retarded!!!!
I dunno… im kinda annoyed and hurt by that… and I really don’t think I looked terrible. This is the same girl who takes a drug to lose weight… guess she is all high and mighty on herself now that she is all skinny….. interesting. Whatever. I attached a pic of us…. Again… maybe I am wrong and I did look ridiculous… but uh….. tell me that BEFORE we go out. Gawd.
Anyways,
This weekend was ok… ate kinda bad sat night… yesterday wasn’t too terrible….. just kind of stuck to my normal. Took yesterday off from the gym, but tonight I need to go again… I am dragging my feet on that though… im not looking forward to it because like Clarence… im just blah today.
And I am breaking out so there is a pimple on my chin. Ugh. Wtf. And im having a fat day… gotta love it!
Dammmmmmmmmn....LET me just tell you!!!.....
HATER!!!!!!!...that's ALL I could think about as I read that your friend said that to you!....
1) You obviously look WAY hotter than her.
2) Your hair is AMAZING in that photo, such style to it...not plain and BLAH like hers. Typical.
3) Your body is ROCKING...especially more so being next to her.
4) You did it the good ol hard way and she didn't.
5) You are a better friend than her, ...and all of the above make her jealous of you.
6) You are obviously WAY smarter than her as well, and more determined than her for you to lose your weight and look great and change your life in SUCH a short period of time....
7) AND you have more control than her. mentally. physically, and socially over yourself enough to not make an ass of yourself.
...it happens I tell you...friends that become haters inside. I dislike people like that...but hey I can't tell you that I've seen it happen with some close friends as well...like WTF?!?! happened?!?!!....
...but then I just choose to alienate myself for a while, or keep them at a distance until I don't feel that anymore. Personally, I am like you...if you don't look good, I'll be a bitch and tell you so...but don't tell me I'm fake and I didn't tell you shit about it before we went somewhere. Ya know?!?!
...
YOU ARE HOT!!!!!....and it's bound to happen I think....you have changed..and SO many people would DIE for the change you have encountered and brought upon yourself in your life...what can you expect ya know. People seem to think that by knocking another person down, it can justify for themselves lacking...which is just wrong. But it's nature.....what are we gonna do right?!!/
.......I'm telling you....I even have friends now who wonder why the hell I run so much now, and don't say anything good to me, unless it has to do with self destruction of myself....then all of a sudden they are my best friends. Awareness. At least we have it.
!
