Geti it off...stay off...

Hi everyone!
Clarissa thanks for coming over!No i am not counting calories.i hate it and find it very very stressful.I DO KNOW I SHOULD count...i count things i know like my coffees or my yoghurts.but when it comes to my main cooked meal i really find it so hard to get the calories since i cook for my husband and child not only do i eat from the pot.that would be really easy to calculate.Exercise is 30 minutes on my bike.to tell the truth i only did it 2 days and then tried the workout dvd but then i didnt do it the 3rd day.

/Br coffee --70 calories 2 mini toasts 60 cal 3 rice cakes 90 cal ----220 calories at breakfast
Lunch quarter chicken breast in oven with approx 2 medium potatoes backed about 60 gr feta cheese and 2 mini toasts
Snack 6 whole wheat biscuits --180 cal , coffee 70 cal slice of bread 80 cal---330
Dinner half cucumber half carrot 1 nectarine

the Parthenon from a roof top i took
View attachment 21040

a nearby beach View attachment 21041

my baby sleeping with his stuffed animal
View attachment 21042

i feel i have overeaten cause of the potatoes i had.also i had some bread i have tried and managed to keep bread away all these days.
got on the scales 95,5 the same.ook my measurements and are the same i think.if i have the tape a little higher i get 1 cm less if i put it a bit lower at my waist i get the same , i dont know where i put the measuring tape at first so i just think that i haven't lost that inch.its just me putting it higher.oh well...i felt so many times today to just say f*&^k it....and go eat a bag of cookies but i m trying to hold on.
We are going on vacation around about the 10 of next month and i really feel so sad that i will be so fat in all my pictures and on the lovely sandy beaches.i feel sad..

View attachment 21038 today's lunch plus some more potatoes and feta

View attachment 21039 my lunch 2 days ago that i didn't post quinoa salad
 

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I don't think that there is any way on this planet that you are eating at maintainance calories, your doing really well, and I guarentee you are loosing fat. Some people say that you lose fat from the inside before you lose it on the outside, maybe that's what is happening to you. Or maybe you are losing it from a body part that you haven't measured. Maybe its to do with your period? Don't let it get you down, I bet you will have a collosal weight loss this week. I have only lost 1 pound this week and I've eaten perfectly. DON'T GIVE UP!!!!!! YOU WILL LOSE A LOT NEXT WEEK!

I think its good to do exercise as it tones you up so that a lovely shape will be revealed as you lose fat, but I don't think it is as important as food. Running an entire marathon burns only one single pound of fat.

Awww Mario is so cute! Is he well again now? Do you live near the Parthenon then? I am so jealous. What a lovely beach as well... And that quinoa salad looks yum.

You look beautiful at any weight, don't worry x
 
jasper said:
Hello everyone...again...
This is another attempt to try loose the weight...i have put on every single kilo i had lost in the first place....i am so ashamed i didn't want to start i diary just cause i didn't want to tell everyone the ugly truth that i weigh 95 kilos again...how embarrassed i feel.
i managed last year to get down to 76 kilos and then from the day i stopped smoking i started to run.i loved it but my weight just went up .it was very difficult for me to stop smoking and eating right it all went real bad.I struggled to keep my weigh under 80 but i just didn't manage at all.None of my clothes fit me again.all my lovely summer dresses from last year all all too tight to wear in public.i feel horrible.fat.ugly etc...feelings i promised myself i would never let myself feel again.but here i am with all my weight on feeling like a looser.I must do something now.Today is my 2nd day of real good eating.i want to eat steamed veggies for two days only and some low fat yoghurt .Maybe I'll do 3 days.After that i know what i must and must do as food is concerned.i am not going to exercise until i drop 10 kilos.Thing is i really do not know how to maintain and also i am scared of loosing my motivation that is really low right now.:piggy::piggy::piggy:
Would love some encouragement and readers sharing their feeling and thoughts
Click to expand...

Oh you sweet dear....90% of this sounds like I could have written it my self!! I have gained 20 back of my 60...and i hate it too! I hate me....but all i know..is we all had such success when we were here and actively posting....that has to be the key to long term success. We all took turns going MIA and we are all back!! I think we need this place much more than we realize! Happy you here and happy I am back....we will get it right one of these days....we just have to keep on trying!! Hugs my friend!
 
View attachment 21043 ---------waist before some days
View attachment 21044 ----------waist today

seems to have lost a bit!Scales are broken or maybe battery dead so no weigh ins.
I didn't post yesterday i didn't get on the internet.I was woken up by this man that said my father (do you remember the horrible story about him a couple of years ago?when i told him to leave cause of what he said about my son...) was in the hospital very ill.
we found out he has heart failure and also that he is going to be homeless once he get out of the hospital since this man that had him is moving to America.it has been very stressful these last 2 days.plus it has been a roller coaster of emotions and thoughts for me.
I made my husband go there last night to visit and he said he is his usual miserable self.My husband and out friend tried to pick him up so he can stand on his feet but he didn't ever try to help himself he was like a sack of potatoes they said.My husband saw him though later on in his bed Push himself up to get comfortable so he CAN move his feel and legs.I believe he has just given up on life and is just waiting to die.
I have been on the phone crazy and finally have arranged for my father to be taken to his brothers country home.BUT our problem is Will he walk?will he get up to use the toilet?we cant afford a live in assistant unfortunately.That would be the best but i cant afford that This is a huge problem and i am feeling very sad tired and exhausted.
Plus i have realized that i am NOT such a good person as i believed i was.I clearly said No when his brother asked if i could take him in .because it is possible.Everything is possible when you want it.but i Don't want it.i don't want to make my already struggling every day life worse and more complicated. I fear that i will be punished by life because of my decision now .I strongly believe that this is a life situation that i will be judged for .I don't believe in religion etc but i believe in good and bad i believe in energy and what you give you get.I will try to work this out after i have settled him in the country home.I don't feel guilt but i do feel a bit shitty for not being a good person////
food yesterday was 5 coffees , 1 steak in oven a cup of rice and at night time i had milk and biscuits i was so hungry

i will update later on tonight for today's food

Thank ladies for coming in here and supporting me!It does mean so much!
 

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Jess, you are NOT a bad person!! I remember very well how unbearable your life was when he was living with you before. Please stop this negative talk about yourself. I know things are tough for you financially as well so you can't even contemplate it. Look after yourself & Mario first & foremost. That should be your priority. Re your diet & not losing weight I could not possibly lose weight if I was not eating very much protein. I always have protein with every meal, including breakfast. From memory I think you struggle with breakfast, but that is the most important meal of the day. If I started my day with just starchy carbs, then that would be what I crave for the rest of the day. I know I have said it before, but yoghurt & fruit is a good way to start your day.
You must, must, MUST look after yourself Jess & eat healthily. Be kind to yourself. You will get there sweets xoxoxo Cate
 
I feel bad about what is happening with your dad, and its easy to think more warmly of people when they are ill. But he has never been there for you, he just turned up out of the blue one day and never left until you asked him too. I remember that he was really rude about the way that you parented Mario as well. He isn't a nice person, so you shouldn't ever feel bad about not taking him in. You would need to stop working to care for him full time.

I think that he was like a sack of potatoes, because he wanted your Husband to feel sorry for him. Could your brother look after him?

Hugs xxxx
 
Br coffee
lunch greek salda with tomatoe cucumber feta cheese 4 crackers a few fries
dinner 1 peach 2 nectarines

Tomorrow is The day i must go to the hospital and get him out with the help of my fav uncle to get him out the hospital in the car and to my other uncles home.Ruth its not my brother that is willing to give the house so my father can stay in.its my fathers brother
i have absolutely no money to pay a nurse or a woman to just live there for some time (or forever maybe) to take care of him.its a horrible day plus i dont think he is going to be happy seeing me.After all after i told him to leave my home he said he didnt have a daughter anymore ....i am going to speak to him in the car.i hope he listens...i have been told that he does not speak much....i dont think that there is something wrong , i just think he is a miserable sick man.that doesnt like the way life has treated him or the way he has dealt with life and he is just miserable.Still that doesnt mean that i am not feeling bad...its not really only about HIM but about ME.how far am i willing to go to help a person?

i havent had much to eat today i am hungry but i only have hotdogs in the house so i'll pass and probably munch on a carrot while watching a movie

Cate i know i should eat br i will i must get some supplies!
thanks ladies!hope everything will be fine
 
These days have been crazy...sorry for not coming on here.food has been fine.Well actually not fne cause i ate for two days only one meal at night and i know that isnt good.Just i didnt have time to eat i was running around like crazy....still NO weight loss..its driving me crazy.i know i am doing something wrong.but what????
things with my father are stressful he is sick and also he is weak .He is staying at his brothers country home and from tomorrow a lady is going to stay with him for 1 month.my uncle is paying for her.doctor told me not to get my hopes up about his health.i asked him straight out if he is going to die and he said that to me.and alos that my father is not cooperating with him .he is just making things worse with his behavior.
when he saw me in the hospital (i barely recognized him..) he spoke to me and seemed more "alive" but then on Sunday i went to see him at the house my mum came with aswell , and he seemed so old so tired and unhappy..he has a walker and its very difficult for him to get up and walk.iwas informed by the doc that his muscles in his legs have weakend because he wasnt moving around as he should of.he has always NOT wanted to walk.always lazy at home.The man that had him living with him for 1 year said to me that he was so dirty in the room he slept that he had to call cleaners in to disinfect the room..he told me that he neverwanted to bath and when he did he made a terrible mess of the bathroom and he ate out of the pot that everybody had to eat from.....i remember when i had him here he pissed in or glasses////i really couldnt put up with him behaving like this/and its not his health that is to blame for this horrible attitude.its his miserable grumppy character.he said i he wants to die.well i dont want to go on and on about this...i will stop here

Br coffee 1 low fat yoghurt 1 nectarine
Lunch Baked zucchini.eggplant potato,tomato onion garlic basil dish small piece feta cheese
Snack coffee 10 cherries
Dinner Slice of watermelon

i had friends over today with their kids soi was running around not sitting on my behind

lots of love1
 
Just don't know what to say, it must be very difficult for you :(
I hope the lady will do him and the situation some good.
 
Jess, you just cannot change how things are with your father. He's the only one who can. His life is not your life. Live your life well and look after yourself & Mario. I am very sorry for how things are, but I think you have to put yourselves first & not feel guilty. He is a good example on how not to live. Worrying yourself about him will hurt you sweetie & won't help him. Sending you lots of love xoxo Cate
 
Hi Jess, I’m happy you are back…I’m also back trying to lose weight. It looks like you are doing great with your food. And don’t worry so much about the scale in the first weeks. Your body will finally get the hint that he has to feed from its “reserves”. Sorry about the issues with your father…Cate is right – “His life is not your life.”
Lots of love :hug2:
 
Thank you all for your kind words!
I am sorry i have not come on again.i have been busy but i have stayed on track.weighed in yesterday at 94.7~~ it was my 1st day of the "month" though so i dont know how this works.At least i havent gained.i am not loosing or gaining!!!
Mady i hope you are rights and my body does go the other way soon!!!!
Cate i am less anxious about things concerning my father.I have to go again on Sunday....
On the 10th we are going on "vacation" to my husbands village its about 250 km away (3-4 hour drive)we are going with our BF's and their kids.we stay at the trailer so its not anything luxurius!!!!just a get away from noise...well thats not true with 3 kids around us but you know what i m saying!
eeek last year i felt sooo good in my costume now i feel like a big whale.anyways...i 'll log on later with food for the day/Doing ok!
 
breakfast 1 coffee
snack 2 rice cakes 2 light triangle cheese 3 sliced smoked turkey 2 wine cookies
lunch 2 homemade beef burgers 1 cup cooked rice green salad with kidney beans
snack lollipop coffee
dinner nectarine
 
"Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince, and dinner like a pauper."
~ Adelle Davis
Enjoy your break sweetie xoxo​
"
 
Cate said everything perfectly... It must be really hard for you though xxx

Have fun when you go away tomorrow! Does Mario get on well with the other two kids? If he plays with them all day then it might be a nice break for you.

I'm going to a festival on Friday... I remember last time I went to one I was slim and danced constantly non-stop in my mini-skirt. Now I am dreading it cos I've put on weight. But I'm sure we can still have fun, and next year when we do it again we will be looking better that ever x
 
Sorry for all the family issues. Just know you can turn here for support that is completely judgement free. Hugs to you my friend!!

Hope you have a nice time away. You need a little break :)
 
I hope things are better! It must be really tough with a family member not feeling well. :(
 
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