Eerika's Diary

Your treats sound so yummy! I love it when I find new stuff to eat that satisfies me and isn't too caloric. Changing things up keeps the motivation going.


What have you been doing at the gym? Mostly cardio- or weights? Or a combination? I'm not so good on exercise these last few days- I hope you're doing better than me!
 
AOMG! Guys I uploaded some silly video of myself by vimeo.com, and its all for you! :D Haha.. I definitely dont like watching myself but I thought it would be nice to give you some live picture about me! Maybe I will post some other videos in the future to you if my english gets any better, and I have actually somehting to say! :D LOL. Anyway, the video is behind the password and I will send it to Rox, Jasper, Rainbow and Joh. But everybody else who are interested of seeing my videos, can send me a message to get the password. :)

:p
 
AROX: I've been doing my weight training at the gym, as usual. I like working out HARD! I gotta feel the pain in my muscles day after gym. :D Sometimes I do cardio also.. But I rather do the cardio outside walking, jogging etc. Getting back with my workout routines havent been difficult cos Ive always done sports.. Its more food now what causes me difficulties. :SS
 
I loved your video!!!!!You made me smile all the way through!!!no its not silly at all its a great idea!!!!You look really nice Erika you are so pretty and i am so jealous of your blonde hair!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!You will manage great girl dont you worry at all.You are really trying to find your way back and it really does count!
 
AThank you lovely! I felt stupid though making that video, weird feeling looking at yourself speaking! But I wont watch it myself again :D Maybe next time I can be more relaxed.. and maybe I should make a script to know what to say so there wouldnt be these "Ummmm?" - moments! :D But you guys should try vimeo.com too, its very easy to use! I would love to see your videos as well. :)
 
I loved it too! I remember you saying ages ago that your English isn't very good, but it is! I didn't expect you to talk with a slight American accent :) It was really good to see what your like in real life :D


Being constantly hungry sucks.
 
hi erika!how is it going>????

are you planing on making a video every day like a diary?\I must agree that your english is lovely!!!!!:)
 
AHi girls! Thanks for all the nice compliments you've given to me about the video. I think I wont do a new video every day, but at least once a week would be fun? Or when I feel like it. :) I will try to film with my camera in the future and try to upload it to the vimeo. First video was taken with the wecam of my pc. And its so great that I can put videos behind the password so just anybody cant catch the videos! Otherwise I probably wouldnt do them..

I think my english sound silly on the tape cos Im so nervous, I think I can do much better. :) And I think my accent can be much more similar to american than british, cos Ive listened much much more american english (movies etc). And our school teaching is also more similar to american accent. I think british accent is so difficult, I could never speak in a that way! But it sounds lovely though. :) I bet Ruthie speaks just like Im imaging.

My weight has gone down -2,1 kg on this week, so not bad start at all! It almost went to 92,7kg instead 92,9kg where it sticked this morning anyway. But Im fine with the first week! This beginning feels just the hardest! :banghead: But I dont want to whine about it.. you guys know exactly how Im feeling.
 
:party:WOOHOOOOO! Well done on the 2 kilo's!!!! I know its hard, but we've got to push through it. I am trying to tell myself that there are worse things than being hungry. Its an uncomfortable feeling, but in a way its nice to feel hungry before you eat... ost people do, its just that we are not used to it because we've been eatig like such piglets. Our appetites WILL adjust soon, and we'll be wondering howthehell we were managing to eat SO much before.


I would love too see more videos from you :) AND YOUR ENGLISH IS GOOD, NERVOUS OR NOT!


There are so many different accents in the UK, so I probably don't sound anything like your imagining. Most people think of Englands posh accent when imagining it, but I'm not posh, although I'm not common. What am I goddammit, WHAT AM I?????
 
AHuhh.. Ive been at practical training from 8 am to 4pm and then at REAL work from 6pm to 9pm! There havent been really freetime today! And Im going tomorrow back at 8am. Also Ive extra working day at saturday, so there is only sunday left for free time! Busybusybusyyyy.. And its been so god damn hard to dare hunger. Stress is like the evil of dieting!!! But I havent given up. I was just going to count my calories of the day... I feel like Ive eaten a lot today, but Ive also felt the hunger and walked around A LOT! So lets see...

FOODS:
7am = 2 eggs fried in olive oil, 100g cottage cheese
9am= sugarfree berrie soup, banana
11 am= sallad (sallad, cucumber, tomatoes, tuna), 1 orange
2pm= 1 can of pineapple
4pm= little bit of couscous, 200g chicken fried in coconut oil, 200g veggies fried in coconut oil, 1 lemon bulgarian yoghurt, coffee with milk.
8pm= 1 orange, coffee with milk.

About 1700-1800 calories!

now Im going to bed.. feeling hungry. I must be burning fat! :D
 
AHey there.. I just came to say my day has been fine and I SO HAVE NOT slipped. :) Its weird how determinded Im feeling, just like a year ago. Im not gonna give up easily this time, actually there should be nothing what would make my diet fall down this time! After all, the whole thingie is in MY hands.. and only my hands.

Foods have been pretty much like yesterday... about 1800-1900 calories. And I went to gym also today and felt sick after, I guess its cos Ive eaten pretty low carb. AND I havent got rid of the hunger either, soo.. Feeling just very tired. OH, and I weighed this morning : 90,5 kg?! Omg. I hope its going DOOOOWN under 90 kg SOON! Wooohoo!

I will get back to you later. xoxo
 
AIve been tough. I EVEN baked a god damn cake for my granmom and didnt try to lick every creamy spoon while doing it! So Ive been tough and Im proud of myself. I weighed 90,5kg this EVENING. So its evening weigh and its so low now?!! WEIRD.. Two weeks ago it was 95kg! OMG. Ive been pretty swollen again I guess. And I can see it from the photos.. (I took another beginning photos two eeks ago). Im so embarrassed about them, but maybe I will publish them when I get REAAAALLL good after photos! I can actually see how I gain fluids in my FACE! I mean really, in the photos Ive seen huge difference in my face. I hate cos I look chubby again, specially from the face cos I cant hide it! :D

Motivation quotes for today..

http://weight-loss.fitness.com/image/id/349657/width/310/height/320

http://weight-loss.fitness.com/image/id/349663/width/320/height/261

Lova ya!
 
I'm very glad that you are feeling strong and motivated!


And it will be SO exciting when you get under 90kgs again!!


I look forward to seeing some progress photos!
 
Ahttp://weight-loss.fitness.com/image/id/349905/width/350/height/263
Me at work. :)


Hi there! Short update.. Ive been busy with work and practical-training. Yesterday when I had to stay longer at work, I didnt have anything to eat so I ate some candy at work! I was a bit upset about it later, but I was so hungry. Today my grandmom had a birthday so I ate few pieces of cheesecake, what I had actually planned to eat before. Anyway, weigh was 91kg this morning so we will see what happens. I want to get under 90 kg so badddd. And os quickly! :(( Not so good day today, even its a day off work.

Later..
 
AOMG!! This morning, weight was 89,5 kg !!! So here I am, 90kg behind me! THANK GOD. Im going for morning jogg now. But I will be back later, maybe with video post! ;) Have a greaaattt day lovelies!:grouphug:
 
I'm SO happy for you:party:


Just seeing that "8" as the first number on the scale feels so good, doesn't it?


Have a great jog and a fabulous day..... and I look forward to a new video from you!
 
AYes Rox, it does. It feels wonderful to see that "8" on the scale. Eventhough my weight has gone down, Ive been feeling miserable today. I dont like looking at myself from the mirror. I hate what I see. I would rather see that "6" as a first number on the scale already.

Ive been spending my weekend watching the biggest loser and I used to be fast season marathons. I try to keep my motivation up. I had a hard time on friday, when everyone else ate candy and I drunk water. In my head I just kept asking WHY MEEE WHYYY?!

Ive been browsing from H&M's webpage their lovely pastel coloured skinny jeans and chinos, and been thinking will I be able to look GOOD in them next summer. I would love to, but Ive never looked good or felt comfortable in skinny jeans! I would looooove to wear sweet colours and tight tops with high heels. I see myself in a totally different way between my ears than what I actually look like from the mirror. In real life my clothes are just dark and black, sacky thingies.. Hiding my fats. My disgusting fat. I disgust myself. :ack2:

Anyway, here is my dreamboard about summer clothes! :piggy:

http://weight-loss.fitness.com/image/id/350010/width/350/height/185
 
aw erika that is GREAT NEWS~~~~~~~~~~!!!!!!!You are making this happen!!!!!!

I would really like to see the {6) number on my scales aswell!!!We will get there though just keep trying.I know how difficult it gets sometimes i am going through a bad couple of months myself....but im really trying to fight it.I WONT GIVE UP YOU WONT GIVE UP and if we fall we will get right up again!


I looooooove clothes ith colours!!!I dont really like pastels though.I feel they are kind of "sweet:" colours for me.I prefer more bright intense colours for myself.But i definatly can see you with your lovely blonde hair in those sweet colours!!!!GET rid of ALL BLACK this summer.I am sure that at 85 kg you will feel AMAZING and will try to get rid of the baggy stuff!!!
 
AThanks lovely for ur comment. Ive sticked with he diet, havent given up! Ive had few bad days,, my mood sucks and I would love to eateat ad eatttt. But I havent. At work it pisses me off when at coffee pause everybody are eating cookies and buns with coffee. And I havent taken any, and I wont. It also irritates me when people ask "Why you re not eating cookie or bun?!" COSSS IMMM NOOTTTTT god damnit. Why people want to make you eat bad stuff so badly?! I dont get it. I havent told anyone Im losing weight though... I dont want any questions about it from them.

Still this weightloss process takes all my energy with practical training. I havent been able to workout really, I have no energy. Im worried will it effect on my diet in the future if Im not able to workout as much as I want to... Anyway, its better that Im moving slowly towards my goal than just eating all the shit and doing nothing. If it takes forever to get that "6" on the scale, so be it..Im gonna get there!
 
Hope your on track again! I love your clothes dream board :) And also that quote about it being 100% possible for anyone to get to their goal weight.
 
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