Curvie Girlie The Diary: Mind Playin' Tricks on Me

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Oh, I love how youre so positive and you're feeling balanced!! I LOVE when I finally get my mind/body and soul balanced its so refreshing!! I'm working on it.
Keep sharing your positive thoughts Val!!!

Thank you, you're welcome, I always enjoy your diary, sorry about your ex doggie :( I hope you find a positive solution for that! Glad you're working on your own balance and I'm eagerly awaiting positive thoughts from YOU, too!

OK Val, you need to start writing a column for a newspaper!!!

THIS IS JUST SUCH A FEEL GOOD PLACE!!!! It's the highlight of my morning :)

Shucks Maureen :eek: I could easily and truthfully say your posts are the highlight of my day!!! :smilielol5: Well, it's a difficult decision there are so many comedians on here ;) And Gordy....well he sort of takes the cake!

School is wippin my ass and taking no prisoners.

LOL!!!!!!!!!!:smilielol5::smilielol5:Oh man I'm sorry to hear that and simultaneously thrilled to hear that phrase. I need to use that! LOVE!

I'll be back tomorrow to continue responding....I have belly dancing now! :leaving:
 
Ha in case you were wondering I am totally stalking you right now... I just keep refreshing to see what else you have posted.... This is my way of procrastinating in a productive (?) way.... I really should run.... I have no excuses....
 
Wow. Yes, I feel you and MAN.....SIGH......you put all that love and time and energy into this person and the end result is he's a crackhead? That is terrible. Beyond terrible. I'm very sorry. There's not much to do in this situation except to let go, OR go out and find him and save him somehow. I dunno what's best, really

Indeed. There are friends in Colorado that has been trying to save him for the past 3 years with no luck. :(

But, I know I did what I could, as you are doing what you can. That's the best we can do, really. Is to know that we at least tried. :)

Talk sometime soon!
G
 
Val, you're a classic example of "you reap what you sow".

This is what happens to people who give from their heart ... not in order to get something back. Your life is enriched by the pleasure of helping; not the kudos you get from other people, and although it's nice to hear what people are saying about you, the bottom line is you have already been rewarded through the act of giving.

That's what makes you so special. And you are sooooo young. You must have an old soul. You are wise beyond your years ;)
 
First off, don't panic. Here's my advice to you:

BUNNY'S GUIDE TO WINE TASTING FOR DUMMIES


#1 Eat a 500+calorie, non-spicy BLAND meal 1.5 hours before you go taste
#2 Drink lots of water beforehand and pee at your own house before you leave
#3 Bring a friend
#4 Assess your decision to get drunk or not. Make the decision beforehand, so if it's "not" then you can catch yourself because it's EASY to spiral out of control, trust me, I SEEN it a lot.
#5 Don't worry about being a novice; it's more annoying to people pouring to hear a "Know It All" yuppie yappin' and not sayin' SHIT than it is to answer honest questions.
#6 Try to start with the whites if you like them. This means going back to the winery's table for the reds after you had all the whites in the place, which might be too much of a hassle. If you prefer reds, it's OK to have whites at the first table and switch to all reds after. Ask someone who's already been there "which winery has the best whites?" and start at THAT table.
#7 It is ok to switch from reds to whites, just not preferrable.
#8 There is no need to rinse your glass out with water unless you want a glass of water to drink, or are switching from RED to WHITE. I always know when a person don't know shit about wine tasting when they rinse the glass. Residual water ruins the next pour's wine's Ph and taste--residual WINE is not going to ruin the next pour much at all. If anything, rinse your glass out with a tiny bit of the next wine. The most convenient thing is to just shake the glass upside down (if you're outside, or course) to get as much residual wine out of it as possible, before the next pour.
#9 Only sniff the wine if you truly enjoy the scent of wine. Swirling gets the scent to waft up to your nostrils. If it all smells the same to you, don't bother--no need to act pretentious.
#10 Avoid getting wasted and "joking" with the person pouring to give you larger pours. That is jackass behavior and there actually is a strict rule of 1 or 2 oz pours at most events. Winery personnel can actually get in big trouble if they disobey the rules.
#11 If you decide to get drunk, HANDLE YOUR FADE. It is illegal to serve visibly intoxicated people--pretend you are sober so you don't make the pour-er worry about how you're getting home.
#12 Enjoy! :cheers2:
#13 Oh yes, cheese will ruin your palate for the next wine but you probably shouldn't be concerned about that if you're not a pro. Just make sure to wait until the taste is pretty much out of your mouth before moving on to the next taste if you decide to stop and sample the hors d'oevres.
#14 Oh and it's OK to spit; newbies won't and they think it's gross; professionals sometimes will ONLY spit. You will still get buzzed; the alcohol seeps in transmucosally :D

P.S. Wine tasting can be a big headache the next day; be sure to drink lots of water before bed.

Ooh, I want to add one rule:

#15 You are not grading this wine on anything other then how much YOU like it. Everyone can call it the greatest wine or the worst shit, none of it matters. This is all about you and your tounge. :p (and a bit your nose)
 
Trops: Totally. I assumed Randy knew that, but I should have stuck that on there.

Maureen: WOW I'm really touched, thank you! I learned a WHOLE lot about myself through philosophy, anthropology, and the Vedas. And interaction with people, and being open. I'd have to say lost of people would wise up if they remained open to new ideas. But it was with meditation and nearly daily Yoga that I reached a place where I was more inclined to naturally make the "right" decisions in my daily life. Yoga is all about wishing happiness and the end of suffering for all beings :)

G: I totally am trying to get to your diary right now!

Dee: LOL! YES you should run--and keep on heavy lifting!!! :smash: Woman, I SWEAR you can change your physique. I also swear that working the lower body helps improve the appearance of cellulite--I seriously and literally need to get my ass under a barbell soon!!!!:smash:
 
Hey Valerie!! Just popping in to say hello. I miss chatting w/you. Been getting killed at work and am in a ton of meetings. I will be in touch soon. Hugs! Can't wait for Saturday!
 
Weight loss and Buddhism, LOL

Thought of the Day:

The Heart Sutra tripped me out and got me pointed in the right direction of emotional balance. Here it is:

Form is no other than emptiness, emptiness no other than form.
Form is exactly emptiness, emptiness exactly form.
Sensation, thought, impulse, consciousness are also like this.

All things are marked by emptiness -
not born, not destroyed,
not stained, not pure,
without gain, without loss.
Therefore in emptiness there is no form, no sensation, thought, impulse, consciousness.
No eye, ear, nose, tongue, body, mind.
No color, sound, smell, taste, touch, object of thought.
No realm of sight to no realm of thought.
No ignorance and also no ending of ignorance to no old age and death and also no ending of old age and death.
No suffering, and also no source of suffering, no annihilation, no path.
No wisdom, also no attainment.
Having nothing to attain, Bodhisattvas (the Enlightened) live prajna paramita (the perfection of wisdom) with no hindrance in the mind.
No hindrance, thus no fear.
Far beyond delusive thinking, they attain complete Nirvana.


Sounds nihilistic, no? :D Are you confused? You should be!

My interpretation is along the same lines of when I was 15 and on acid and came to the conclusion that "Everything is nothing and nothing is everything and it is ALL intertwined and connected to us all!" Apparently I was a Buddhist before I knew it :D

The Heart Sutra is kinda like "what's the sound of a tree falling in the woods with no one to hear it?" in a sense, but it's ultimate meaning is to make students see that form and emptiness are not separate, that everything is interbeing, and everything is connected. For example, you have a heart, lungs, blood, bones, etc--but it's all your body. You brain is your mind, but it's also your body. Your weight loss efforts and pitfalls are not just the physical acts or lack thereof, but also the manifestations and stagnations of the mind. And whether you believe in a kind of spirit or not, it IS God, and you are God, if god is you and everything. Knowing that, you can do anything. Pretty much in a nutshell, IMO.

So when you look at what this means in relation to your daily life, you can see that in order to exist, you're relying on literally millions of co-arising events, simply to be able to breathe and experience this very moment--let alone lose fat! LOL! :rotflmao: It makes the effort to explain WHY we are not losing with ONE ASPECT sort of....illusory. Here is an if-then statement I came up with: IF our sense of separation from our emotions and from the world outside our bodies is an illusion, then when we truly see our body as a constant state of change and arising and ceasing in every moment, we'll no longer be complacent toward life and will be able to be with whatever is arising with a sense of clarity, compassion, and awareness.

After that, then comes the strategy. Planning meals, listening to our bodies, making the decision to avoid situations and scenarios where we might over-eat or over-drink, or whatever. Choosing to face stressful situations with a positive attitude--and rising above the urge to comfort ourselves with food, alcohol, drugs, whatever. Balance will follow, and add some discipline up in that bitch and you got yourself your dream body.

This may sound wack as fuck, but it's definitely a different and open-hearted way of looking at weight loss!

Word.
 
Dee: LOL! YES you should run--and keep on heavy lifting!!! :smash: Woman, I SWEAR you can change your physique. I also swear that working the lower body helps improve the appearance of cellulite--I seriously and literally need to get my ass under a barbell soon!!!!:smash:


Yes I ran and damn fast (for me) too... had a PR on 2 miles!

And yes strength, I am currently readying some material Steve gave me before we build a program.

Feeling THIN today... :) its a good feeling!

:party:
 
Hey Val, thanks for the imput on the thyroid and yoga. Can you send me the yoga moves/program you mentioned???

Have a great Wednesday!! I'll catch up later, I have tons of homework.
 
Yes I ran and damn fast (for me) too... had a PR on 2 miles!

And yes strength, I am currently readying some material Steve gave me before we build a program.

Feeling THIN today... :) its a good feeling!

Oooh yes I just read your diary posts!! :grouphug:

Amy: You're welcome, let me do some digging.....
 
This may sound wack as fuck, but it's definitely a different and open-hearted way of looking at weight loss!

Word.


Word indeed. Old thinking just wouldn't work for me, as it stood. I found channeling celestial thoughts a breaker of old habits.

Gawd, I've said a brazillion times wl is sfmental. You just have a much better delivery. That's a good thing.
 
I appreciate open ended and circular information that makes me draw my own conclusion!! Which came first... the chicken, or the egg?? :D :biggrinjester:

I'm just Joshing ya!! Good stuff Bunny! :) :)
 
Ahh Randy and Alta and J, glad to see you! :hug2:

I AM SO FUCKING TIRED!!!! :ack2:

I haven't even updated my shit for the day! Here's what I put in my other online diary:

"My diet has taken a life onto its own, and is on a roll. Yesterday I ate really lightly without issue, and came out just under 1600 calories. The past two days I just have eaten a Perfect Foods Bar instead of a meal for dinner. I'd rather make myself a wholesome salad but yeah, I get out of Yoga at 9pm, it takes a good 45 minutes to drive home, and I have things to attend to once I get there (last night is was FUCKING 32 DEGREES!!!); I had to build a big ass fire. Man, I have no idea how to split logs I was inside trying to split this big log to fit into the stove with a tiny hatchet and it WASN'T working so I gave up before I hurt myself! Fortunately, I used my spatial skills and managed to wedge the log in there--it just barely fit and there's this tricky grate in the way.

Oh anyway I'm saying that I need to eat more salads. Protein has been ON POINT, fat? Hell yes! Plenty of good fat. But greens? Shi-yit! I've been neglecting, I HATE it when I can't manage perfect nutrition Good thing I take a multivitamin.

OH yes! My weight is back to 139.5 lbs. I'm not going to go apeshit about that, yet, because I KNOW that 6 pounds is a lot to lose in 3 weeks and I'm prepared for gains and plateaus in the next couple weeks. Still, I have to keep on truckin' with the diet!

I went to belly dancing class and then to Yoga 1-2 yesterday. Our sub was a sweet girl, but a sucky teacher. That's aiight, I still got stretched out. Lawrdy I miss Delena! I can't wait til she comes back from Indonesia.


I didn't mention that I had a fitful sleep. I woke up in the middle of the night to put more wood on the fire, and I started thinking random thoughts that kept me from falling asleep right away. I have been drinking a lot of tea, too--maybe too much! And strong, too. Also getting to sleep at midnight and waking up at 6:45am--that's not enough sleep for me. That has to stop! :smash:

HUNGRY today--I was lucky enough to enjoy a new frozen dish by Amy's Organics: vegan soul food. HA! Cornbread, sweet potato mashed, collards, and sweet bean chili--all for only 340 calories! :hurray: Fucking delicious, too :drooling: It was soooooo comforting--had at 10am as a midmorning snack, haha! Tofu burrito, salsa, and a fresh mango for lunch, and just now, another Perfect Foods Bar. I'm going to get burned out on them, I know it :rolleyes: Anyway, that's 1556 calories today so far--I'm giving myself a break because I DID CARDIO TODAY!!!!!! I managed a 33 minutes SLOW run on the beach--my lungs are JUST about healed from the infection.

I'm also planning on Yoga tonight. I'm sleeping over at PZ's as well. Haven't seen him since Sunday, so I'm looking forward to it.

OH!

This is no one's business.......but I'll gossip anyway, ha! :reddevil:

Yesterday I left my phone at home on accident and didn't notice until 7pm or so. I hadn't called PZ on Monday and I figured he probably had been texting me or something. When I got home at 10-ish, I had a message from him so I called him back. We chatted for a bit then he kinda sighed and said,
"I don't like to compare people but......I just want to say, after dealing with Jody [his ex girlfriend] today, that I really appreciate having fun with you--"
I cut in to laugh and apologize for talking about my own ex too much if I was. We both talked a little bit about how glad we are that things are so good between us, compared to our previous relationships. His ex and he are intertwined on a business level, and yesterday he was breaking it to her that he's ending that relationship as well; it's private and I just want to assure everyone it's totally a legit situation and I'm not bothered in the slightest. I have never met her and wouldn't give two shits if they were best friends, because I'm secure and I feel no possessive emotions over PZ right now. But as an ego boost, here are the facts: Apparently "Jody" is kinda oversensitive and emotional. That's annoying to say the least. She also still wants PZ sorta and HE was the one to break up with HER 3 months before I met him. They dated for 2 years but he says he "just wasn't that into her." LOL! Poor Jody! ;) Well, for one thing, he told me she is "extremely dyslexic." I thought that meant she can't read or spell well, but he had elaborated once that it means she can't comprehend the words that come out of his mouth a lot of the time, and he has to repeat himself/break it down/use Layman's terms/draw a diagram to get his point across, conversationally. "Oh, so she's a BIMBO!" I thought meanly at the time (PZ is really easy for me to talk to and I can use BIG WORDS with him and complex paragraphs and he gets it just fine). Yet he claims she is a "nerd." I think he means "dork" but is too nice to say. Actually, whenever he described her, he did it very reluctantly like he didn't want to talk shit. Nice PZ :) STILL, here are some more facts: she's much plainer than me. Her body is not as hot as mine. She does not like to go out and party. She freaks out over little things, and is clingy. What's WORSE is that their sex life was unsatisfactory. And when she found out that he's dating me, she like, almost started crying and admitted to him that she wouldn't be able to handle meeting me, ever. I feel sorry for this chick, but que sera. :waving:

Anyway he's relieved that he has me, now--and give him credit, he was single for 3 months. I guess interaction with her causes him extreme stress and he doesn't want that in his life. Well, we all know exes are no good.
 
damn.....3 months and he moved on ...WOW!!! ...I was talking to my friend and he is taking space because she wanted it...from an 8 year relationship and they have a 4 year old baby.....but he was telling me that now after ONE MONTH :eek: he was going to start dating....

...shocked the hell out of me....how fast some people move on....that's life though huh! :coolgleamA:
 
Just saying HEY:)SO HEY!!!That is intersteing abt PZ and his ex...and WOW to feeling all goddess (A great yoga pose, one of my favs) like and such in comparisson:)

Enjoy PZ tonight!!!

 
damn.....3 months and he moved on ...WOW!!! ...I was talking to my friend and he is taking space because she wanted it...from an 8 year relationship and they have a 4 year old baby.....but he was telling me that now after ONE MONTH :eek: he was going to start dating....

...shocked the hell out of me....how fast some people move on....that's life though huh! :coolgleamA:

WOW - I think thou that guys move on faster most of them anyway...

Gawd it took me years and years to get over my relationship ending and ex...
 
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