Come on guys...its a support forum!!

[Korrie]

I just wanted to mention this. I"ve been noticing lots of posts and not many responces. I came across a thread today that had 29 views and no responces. This is a support forum! we come here to get support from our peers. I know this forum is one of the best on the net, so lets really up the effort to help each other out

 

[Jeff91]

seeing as this thread had 42 views and no response, I couldn't agree more

 

[RollUpAndShine]

I know hehe. the view count to reply ratio of this thread is very appropriate!!

I agree , although i have to confess I am a serial lurker. I'm gonna post more from now on!

 

[ecky1]

I try to answer people that have no replies as often as possible but the problem is that most of them won't come back to the forum at all, and the others might make one more post and you never see them again. Of the newbies that I have replied to I think that probably only 1 in 30 actually go on to post for any length of time.
Saying that, it won't stop me replying to people but only if I have time after posting to the people that have become my friends.

 

[Carmen_]

Korrie, you are right! I am almost a newcomer so I didn´t know if this was the usual dynamic of the site or not. I'll do my best to answer ths posts!

 

[summer123]

I think many of the 'views' are unregisterd people doing google searches and findint questions similar to what they are looking for help on, few register, the net is full of lurkers who are either too afraid of the virtual world, don't know how it works or are afraid for whatever reason of giving any personal details.

 

[ForRealThisTime]

Hi Korrie,

I would think part of the problem is people replying like in this thread http://weight-loss.fitness.com/before-after-between/42139-those-who-have-lost-70-90-pounds.html

Sometimes its intimidating or makes people reluctant to post a response with their own views or experience when the reply can be "where are the independent studies". I own a forum much larger than this one and whilst quality of information is extremely important and debate can be healthy often members, new members in particular, will tend not to post as they do not have the time to defend their opinion.

On my forum we keep our "experts" in a dedicated area where they can argue about who has spent more time researching etc while the rest of the forum gets on with things.

Just some rambling thoughts

 

[Stacy]

I have to agree with "ForReal", when I first started this site I noticed a lot of people responding to posts but they would get shot down by people saying stuff like "where is your proof?" "Show me the links" "Show me the studies that have proven that" etc, and arguments would ensue, when often it's just someone giving their own opinion or their own personal experience. It can be intimidating responding to a question or giving advice when so many people want proof to back up everything they are saying.

 

[ChefChiTown]

Hi Korrie,

I would think part of the problem is people replying like in this thread http://weight-loss.fitness.com/before-after-between/42139-those-who-have-lost-70-90-pounds.html

Sometimes its intimidating or makes people reluctant to post a response with their own views or experience when the reply can be "where are the independent studies". I own a forum much larger than this one and whilst quality of information is extremely important and debate can be healthy often members, new members in particular, will tend not to post as they do not have the time to defend their opinion.

On my forum we keep our "experts" in a dedicated area where they can argue about who has spent more time researching etc while the rest of the forum gets on with things.

Just some rambling thoughts

Personally, I think you blew that member's comment way out of proportion and now you're acting as if it's a sin to tell someone that they shouldn't take medical advice from someone who maaaaay or may not be a doctor.

You said you own a forum, correct? Then you, of all people, should know that absolutely anybody can sign up to be a member of a forum and immediately begin posting. And, unless rules are strictly enforced, you can post anything you want to. So, that means, I could sit here all day long and act as if I was a millionaire and offer up financial advice. Or I could act as a professional skateboarder and tell everybody how to do a 360 McTwist with an ollie kickflip. Or I could act as an astronaut and explain how to fly a space shuttle. Or I could pretend I was Kurt Rambis (Google it) and tell you how to look good in short shorts. Or...I could talk like I'm a licensed medical professional and hand out bullshit medical advice and pass it off as scientific fact.

So, when someone starts barking out medical advice on a public internet forum, it's actually quite a reasonable response to question their comments' validity.

This is a public internet forum - everybody is free to speak their mind, as long as they follow the board rules. And, telling someone that they shouldn't be handing out medical advice when they are not a doctor is more than reasonable.

 

[allcdnboy1]

Chef - certainly, but i think there are lot of clashing personalities on here and there are ways at avoid conflict. instead of directly attacking someone that is stating something that you believe to be false, you could more casually ask where they got their information because it's not what you understand to be true. it's all about the approach. you could nicely give them a link to where you get your information and ask them what they think about it. if you immediately put someone up against a wall, they become deaf to anything you try to get across.

 

[HeidiS]

So, when someone starts barking out medical advice on a public internet forum, it's actually quite a reasonable response to question their comments' validity.

This is a public internet forum - everybody is free to speak their mind, as long as they follow the board rules. And, telling someone that they shouldn't be handing out medical advice when they are not a doctor is more than reasonable.

Can you point out in that post where I offered any medical advice? Everything I talked about was based off personal experience and common knowledge, or what I've seen in the before and after pictures on this very forum.

The OP asked if anyone had lost that amount of weight before, and I went out of my way to give them as much information as possible and the person who posted after me was as asshole for no reason. I didn't give out any medical advice whatsoever - so I can see why other people would be hesitant to post here when there are certain members who like to nitpick people's responses.

 

[ForRealThisTime]

Personally, I think you blew that member's comment way out of proportion and now you're acting as if it's a sin to tell someone that they shouldn't take medical advice from someone who maaaaay or may not be a doctor.

You said you own a forum, correct? Then you, of all people, should know that absolutely anybody can sign up to be a member of a forum and immediately begin posting. And, unless rules are strictly enforced, you can post anything you want to. So, that means, I could sit here all day long and act as if I was a millionaire and offer up financial advice. Or I could act as a professional skateboarder and tell everybody how to do a 360 McTwist with an ollie kickflip. Or I could act as an astronaut and explain how to fly a space shuttle. Or I could pretend I was Kurt Rambis (Google it) and tell you how to look good in short shorts. Or...I could talk like I'm a licensed medical professional and hand out bullshit medical advice and pass it off as scientific fact.

So, when someone starts barking out medical advice on a public internet forum, it's actually quite a reasonable response to question their comments' validity.

This is a public internet forum - everybody is free to speak their mind, as long as they follow the board rules. And, telling someone that they shouldn't be handing out medical advice when they are not a doctor is more than reasonable.

Okay so lets begin by you showing me where medical advice was given in that post. Okay you cant... anyway...

Yes me of all people should know that, which is why I said quality of information is important, you seem to have missed that also, I suggest you read each word rather than scanning posts and assuming you have picked up everything in them.

Your attitude is exactly the reason people do not bother responding much on here. You think I blew that members comment way out of proportion, that is your opinion and you are entitled to it. I read a post from a member who had asked a question and specifically asked for replies from people who had experience. What I saw was another member, with personal experience, taking the time out to reply and share their experience. This was promptly followed by someone telling them they should not be sharing their personal experience because they are not medically qualified??? that doesnt even make sense. You do not have to be a doctor or someone who scans google for medical reports/studies to have personally experienced something. I will take real world experience over something someone read online every time.

I also agree with AllCdnBoy - if my experience is significantly different to someone else I will usually post my experience and let the OP hear all sides of the story. If someone wants to enter in to a debate I will entertain them. If they want to enter in to a pissing competition then they are on their own as I have more important things to do. There are ways of highlighting a difference of opinion or conflicting information in a constructive way, people who cannot do this have communication issues in my opinion.

 

[ChefChiTown]

Can you point out in that post where I offered any medical advice? Everything I talked about was based off personal experience and common knowledge, or what I've seen in the before and after pictures on this very forum.

I wasn't talking about your post. I was talking about the post that ForReal had a problem with - the one made by MCR.

The OP asked if anyone had lost that amount of weight before, and I went out of my way to give them as much information as possible and the person who posted after me was as asshole for no reason. I didn't give out any medical advice whatsoever - so I can see why other people would be hesitant to post here when there are certain members who like to nitpick people's responses.

As AllCdnBoy said, there are a lot of different personalities on this forum and, quite often, those personalities will clash. I don't understand why people see this as such a big surprise or even an issue at all. It happens in the real world, so it's bound to happen on the internet too. I mean, I don't agree with everybody I physically meet and not everybody I physically meet agrees with me either. So, why is it such a shocking thing when it happens online?

I don't know...it just doesn't make sense to me that people who post on a public internet forum (not you personally - just people in general) have such an issue when not everybody in the world agrees with every single word that they say. Personally, I think it's kind of dumb. Not everybody is the same - people have different ideas, points of view, morals, values, beliefs, experiences, knowledge, etc. So, when people of different personalities meet on a forum and don't agree with each other, I find it kind of ridiculous that so many people out there act as if it's such a huge problem. It's life. It's what happens, you know?

And, in my opinion, a lot of the people who post here have extremely thin skin. People take things waaaaay too personally and make mountains out of mole hills for absolutely no reason. Hell, I'm one of the most blunt people you'll ever run across in your life, so I'm well experienced in the "clashing personalities" department. But, to take an honest look at things - to take a step back - people usually just blatantly overreact to things that I say. And, I'm not the only one that people do that too. There are pleeeeenty of instances (and not just on this forum) where people have made an issue out of nothing. And, it's kind of silly, in my opinion.

I personally think that people just need to realize that not everybody feels the same way, thinks the same way, talks the same way or acts the same way - so, when we run across another member who doesn't match our own personality, we just need to leave it alone. There's no issue, so why create one?

Okay so lets begin by you showing me where medical advice was given in that post. Okay you cant... anyway...

Like I said earlier, I wasn't referencing Heidi's post.

Yes me of all people should know that, which is why I said quality of information is important, you seem to have missed that also, I suggest you read each word rather than scanning posts and assuming you have picked up everything in them.

...says the person who couldn't even figure out what post I was referencing?

Your attitude is exactly the reason people do not bother responding much on here.

What exactly is my attitude?

I will take real world experience over something someone read online every time.

Right, because what you read online isn't necessarily the truth. It's not necessarily valid, accurate or reliable - especially when it's written by a member on a public internet forum. Call me crazy, but I'm fairly certain that's the point that MCR made in the thread that you referenced earlier. I'm fairly certain that the reason he/she made the comment they made was because they know that absolutely anybody can post absolutely anything they want to on an internet forum. Was it worded poorly? Yeah, I'll give you that. But, there's no reason for anybody to make an issue out of it.

That's my two cents.

 

[Stacy]

Personally, I think you blew that member's comment way out of proportion and now you're acting as if it's a sin to tell someone that they shouldn't take medical advice from someone who maaaaay or may not be a doctor.

It sounded like you where defend what MCR said -

HeidiS, unless you know for sure, don't make a comment about this. You're only assuming and not stating facts.

Which was basically bashing HeidiS for giving her own personal observations and experiences on a forum post that asked for personal experience - and TELLING HER NOT to comment about this. When the poster of the thread only asked:
"To those who have lost 70-90 pounds...
I'm in the process of losing that much weight. But I was wondering if there were any issues with loose skin. Also, how long did it take for you to lose the weight?

Thanks"

I think the two members you are arguing with where just trying to make the point that it's tough sometimes to give advice or give personal experience testimonies to question posts on this forum when there are comments like the one MCR made that basically turn around and jump down your throat for doing so.

Everyone knows that there are jerks on the internet, but I seamed to me that ForReal and HeidiS where just making a point as to why some people may chose not to answer posts on this forum. There really is no reason to get personal, and accuse people of having too thin skin and having huge issues with other people who just happen to have a difference of opinion. I don't think it's about that at all. I think they where just pointing out one of the likely reasons why there aren't more people responding to posts.

 

[ForRealThisTime]

Like I said earlier, I wasn't referencing Heidi's post.
perhaps you should make your point more clearly, given that apparently two people were confused over what you were referencing.




...says the person who couldn't even figure out what post I was referencing?
Me and another member, again perhaps you should make your point more clearly.



What exactly is my attitude?
Well your reference to "someone barking out medical advice displays some sort of attitude. What exactly that attitude is would take some further reading of your replies in other threads which I personally do not have the time to do. Your general attitude might be fantastic I dont know. When you refer to someone giving advice as "barking" ... well I would call that attitude pretty poor.


Right, because what you read online isn't necessarily the truth. It's not necessarily valid, accurate or reliable - especially when it's written by a member on a public internet forum. Call me crazy, but I'm fairly certain that's the point that MCR made in the thread that you referenced earlier. I'm fairly certain that the reason he/she made the comment they made was because they know that absolutely anybody can post absolutely anything they want to on an internet forum. Was it worded poorly? Yeah, I'll give you that. But, there's no reason for anybody to make an issue out of it.

See here is my problem with your logic or lack thereof. By your reckoning because a forum is public and anybody can post on it nothing is to be trusted. And when a member gives a reasonable account of their experience it should be open to them being advised to stop giving that account of their experience because they are not medically qualified.

-Would it be more acceptable if prior to posting they were to say they were medically qualified? If so how would you go about verifying this

-The OP in that thread never stated "can medically qualified personnel only respond" therefore who has the right to criticize any non-medically qualified person for replying with their personal experience

-If we follow your lack of logic we should simply allow people to ask questions and then setup a member group for verified experts and only permit them to reply. See how long a forum lasts with such strict rules.

Replies in bold above.

To return to the original point of this thread, I believe that a friendlier environment makes for a free flowing forum. People should be free to post (so long as they are not spamming) in any thread that they can share some knowledge or experience in. If advice being given is dangerous or totally incorrect then of course it should be highlighted but beyond that it smells of arrogance and flexing of intellect which impresses no one and ultimately leads to a reluctance of some members to post and that is not a positive for a community forum.

 

[ChefChiTown]

Replies in bold above.

Yes, because two whole people being confused by someone's post means that the post is obviously incomprehensible and flawed. Two people, mind you, that probably misread the post because they were taking it personally. which lead them to read things the wrong way. God forbid a realistic and totally understandable scenario happen. Maybe I should rethink my whole entire style of talking just to suit the minor instances in which a minor miscommunication happens.

And, my logic is nowhere close to "only verified medical professionals are allowed to offer medical advice". I can see how you would think so, but, just for the record, you're wrong.

My logic is "I don't know who in the f*ck these other members are, so I'm not going to take their word as a fact, because they could be absolutely anybody - a stay at home mom, a 16 year old high school girl, a McDonald's manager, a librarian, a truck driver, a mentally retarded person, a liar, a poser, a faker, etc." So, when someone offers up intricate advice, especially when it comes to health issues, and they have absolutely no credentials which say that they know what they're talking about, I, personally, am not going to take what they say as an undisputable fact or even a reputable tidbit of advice.

And, even if someone is a medical professional, it doesn't mean that their advice is the best to follow. Doctors are wrong too...more than people would like to admit or realize.

Personally, I listen to people I trust. And, no offense to anybody on this forum, I don't trust 99% of the people that post on internet forums. They're all strangers and I have no reason to listen to them or take them seriously...that is, until they have proven to me that they know what they're talking about. Maybe MCR feels the same way I do, which might be why they quickly chimed in with their two cents. Yet, people here are acting as if what they said was wrong. Was it worded poorly? Yes, and I've already stated that. But, there was absolutely nothing wrong with what they said. HOW they said it? Maybe. WHAT they said? No, absolutely not.

And, personally...I think forums work the best when people engage in conversation - when people trade their individual ideas, share their personal experience and exchange the knowledge that they have with one another. More often than not, conversations turn into debates and debates stimulate conversation within people who might not usually speak up (just take this thread for example). And, unfortunately, when that happens, people butt heads. Not everybody agrees with one another, so people don't see eye-to-eye at times. That's all that happened with the whole MCR post in the other thread. And, let's be honest...that's all that's happening here too.

 

[Stasia]

Maybe MCR feels the same way I do, which might be why they quickly chimed in with their two cents. Yet, people here are acting as if what they said was wrong. Was it worded poorly? Yes, and I've already stated that. But, there was absolutely nothing wrong with what they said. HOW they said it? Maybe. WHAT they said? No, absolutely not.

MCR told someone who hadn't posted medical advice not to post medical advice. How is that right?

You denied that you were referencing Heidi's post at all, but MCR definitely was, and if you are supporting the content of his or her post, it is a fairly logical assumption that you were talking about Heidi's post being medical advice when you say things like "So, when someone starts barking out medical advice on a public internet forum, it's actually quite a reasonable response to question their comments' validity" in defense of the post that clearly stated it was to Heidi.

I'm not saying that's what you were trying to say, but the post was certainly unclear.

 

[ChefChiTown]

MCR told someone who hadn't posted medical advice not to post medical advice. How is that right?

That's not the issue I was addressing.

But, since you brought it up, why is that a problem? All MCR did was something that you are about to do yourself and that is...

You denied that you were referencing Heidi's post at all, but MCR definitely was, and if you are supporting the content of his or her post, it is a fairly logical assumption that you were talking about Heidi's post being medical advice when you say things like "So, when someone starts barking out medical advice on a public internet forum, it's actually quite a reasonable response to question their comments' validity" in defense of the post that clearly stated it was to Heidi.

...assume.

Too many people assume things on this forum and it causes problems. It causes horribly unnecessary miscommunication. People assume something, then they start looking at the situation all wrong and then continue on to start digging into issues that don't even exist. Then, we end up with threads like this which go waaaaay off topic (and yes, I acknowledge I am partly responsible for that).

What MCR did in the other thread is absolutely no big deal. Yet, people are trying to make it one. That's all I'm saying and there's no need for anybody to dig deeper into it and start nitpicking about what they are assuming to be true.

But, as I just acknowledged...this thread has gone waaaaay off topic. So, to keep it from getting even worse, I'm just going to step away. I have weiner jokes to catch up on anyway.

 

[Korrie]

You guys need to stop....the bickering on this forum is out of control.

For now on...ONLY responces I want to see have to do with the original post and THAT IS ALL.

 

[JanaNanner]

Support is great, but I'm the kind of person who only says something when I have something to say. It feels fake and forced, otherwise. I like to think that I do my best to be supportive but there have definitely been times when I've read something and then left without a word because I didn't actually have anything worth contributing. But at the same time, it doesn't hurt to just type "Good job! Keep it up!" real quick if someone posts some good news.