Changing the way i feel

Hey Jasper! It's been a few days! I hope you're doing well today. :) So if you are in the market for exercise equipment may I make a suggestion for testing an elliptical? You get a great workout and its so much easier on your joints than a treadmill.
 
Where have u been Ashy?\thanks for passing by, i think that eliptical is a fantastic workout.Im kinda scared of it.When i used to go to the gym i gor on sometimes and it was so difficult for me but i did brak out in sweat SO far and i think its better than a treadmill
I cant reakky afford anything right now but im doing reseach so i ll know prices makes ect when (hopefully)time comes to buy one!
So tired today.Finally ALL the kids are sleeping....I m just resting on the couch,...I dont know how mothers with 3 kids handle it!!!Its so difficult
Well here goes

BR Coffee --100 cals,4 toasts with cream cheese(extra cheese!)190cals
Lunch---i had this,its not my photo i googled it but its the same thing.Pieces of chicken breasts on the stick with bacon around...So im counting 4 pieces of bacon---180cals and chicken breast i dont know.It was grilled no oil added.

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1pita bread grilled -130 cals
2tspoon of extra ligh mayo 25 cals=525 cals without the chicken...

Snack coffe --60 cals + 1 small biscuit 45 cals=105
Dinner yoghurt 204cals
Total 1124 Without the chicken so i hope i havent gone over 1500....
 
Mad house- yep, I know how you feel lol. You've got me thinking about getting some hardcore fitness equipment now.... Hmmmmmmm......

Your lunch looks supertasty.
 
your doing well, as for 3 boys running around you learn to adapt (I have 3 sons, all are ADHD among other problems) but they can be run out of energy eventually assuming you can live on minimum sleep :D
 
Well if my butt didnt really hurt from the bike i was happy with the equiptment i already have,I dont have anyspace at home either.If i had space and cash i deffinetly would own a treadmill and eliptical.
Overtherainbow what kind of equiptment are you interested in?

Trusylver what is ADHD ???
I only have a 2 year old boy and its ok i can manage.But 3 kids staying in the same house for a couple of days>???You deserve a metal!!!!!It soooo hard!!!All the shouting and running and food all over...just thinking of the day that passed makes me more tired!!!
 
Im beat again...had a little fight with my husband:argue:
and not feeling very cheerfull....
Im missing the forum a lot , looking around pics and diary

BR coffee and 1 cookie
VERY LATE LUNch at 6pm 40gr basmati rice with corn and about 70 gr shredded boiled chicken breast mixed in .2 t.spoons extra light mayo.
8pm coffee
Dinner : i havent had and its 11 pm so if i ger hungry i'll have my yoghurt
No exercise but took the kids to the park didnt sit for a second,did housework,washed the dogs so i think ive done some good!!!
Dont feel like cal counting what i had today right now,im tired,
 
:( So sorry you had a bad day. It doesn't sound so bad calorie wise, although obviously in normal circumstances you don't want to be eating like that. I really hope things get better for you.
 
Hi!!things are much more quite since my friends have gone back home
Yesterday until 6pm i was doing so good and then i sliped.I didnt even think about it ...i ate bad.I dont feel as bad as i thought i would though....
I said to myself that ive been doing good for 7 weeks so its ok im back on track
STill i didnt have any chocolate.i had two grilled cheese...and a souvlaki...i had two infront of me but was so full when i finished the first i didnt want more.
I think my stomach has gone smaller cause if this happen 2 months ago i would have had them both and fries and a greek salad.
So Today im going to be extra carefull.Im pleased a little in my bad behavour for two reassons.
1st i ate bad but less then usual and not because i wanted to be carefull,but because i didnt want more
2nd i ate bad and i havent given up.that means my mind has changed!!!
Will check in tonight with food consumed.
 
Sounds like you've done really well, particularly with friends around and unhealthy food. And those realisations and willingness to control portions are really important in keeping the diet going. :)
 
I could have done much better yesterday but ok im leaving that to the past!!!

BR coffee
Lunch rice with boiled chicken breast , 1 sm.toast
Snack Jelly
Dinner Yoghurt

Exercise 40 minutes st.bike---500 cals!


Ive got my period so im blaming that for my increased appetite...i served my husband his dinner and had a mouthfull of it...i just cant seem to resist,at least i didnt eat more that a bite....My son gave me his icecream to hold and i took a bite out of that too..,...i NEARLLY bought myself one .The cals when on the packaging 189 , so i just said NO...but im really temted.Its like even the thought of eating bad things is making my sad...Hope tomorow is better and i dont crave things....
Even now im feeling hungry...I have to contunue my good work and reach my 1st goal of 88kg...God this is a long journey and its just the beggining
 
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So i had a busy day yesterday with cleaning for 5 hours non stop.I didnt have time for snacks ect so i only had 1 main meal that was 2 medium meatballs with salad and then i had a yoghurt.l went on my scales today and 89,3
I hope this is from my time of the month bloated....
ive got things to do around the house today will get on my bike later on.
 
\i just had lunch.meat and salad and little rice.
I wont be having anything else i know cause im so full.Ill have my yoghurt at night!My yoghurts are like MINE ONLY...my child tries to get his little messy hands on them but im sure to keep them on the upper part of the fridge , so he cant reach!!!!How bad am i?????
I was reading eerikas diary and read about ex's...What a sad story.I havent got over mine either...I 'm going to brag noe so you dont really have to continue...
Just really feel like writing ,remembering right now.
I met him when i was 17 years old.He was 16.We dated and were together for a year then i broke up with him cause he lied about something.Then i met someone else , moved to NY stayed for a couple of years but did come and go back to Greece in the meantime.It's like i was working just to make up for ticket money!!!When i was in Greece i saw him again on and off.But i was really a free spirit then i was gone with the wind...How lovely it was to be so young!
Then i decided to not go back to america.I went to night school and as i was waiting for the bus to go home one night HE passed by with his car , gave me a lift and we were together again!I was sooo inlove!I adored him...He had a bad habbit of drinking to much beer and going out with his friends many times without me, that made me jealous.So from 2004 until 2007 we were together.Fighting so much,both swearing that we're finished and them we usued to cry in others arms , not being able to stop this strange relathionship.
SO many times we said STOP.Then he did it again,he left me at home one night , and took his car and friend to another city 500 kilometers away...Belive it or not that night , without knowing anything i had this dream,it woke me up and i called at 4am...i asked him Where he was , ,he told me what he had done....i couldnt stand it....we had a fight and then he didnt return my calls.he vanished for nearlly 2 weeks....So on our 3rd year anniversary i was crying my eyes out cause i didnt know if this was the end..i was mad , and worried...So my girls took me out that weekend for drinking and dancing!Then i met my husband!It was strange...cause i missed my ex but was also so atracted to the new man!!!We went out and i was having so much fun(i lost so much weight then from just been happy) and them ex came by my house at 5 am , waking my dad and myself....he wanted to see me...so i went downstairs and he drove off with me ...we kissed...i was confused...i was dating someone else
Then i found myself torn between two men..i hated it...i used to be sleeping next to my new bf and getting up in the middle ofthe night , driving to nowhere crying...i could breath.It was like my ex was a viruse , couldnt get him out of me...
This happened for nearlly 3 months.I broke it of with my new bf(future husband)....and he was so sad..he drove passed my flat with his bike just to see if my light was on...i asked him to give me some time to make up my mind.He said ok,that night i was supposed to make up my mind for good.My new bf had givven me in the beggining a nice ring.||He told me that when ever i wear it i must know he is next to me.
So that saturday night i went out with the old lov of my life and saw the ring on my hand.It clicked.I told him i cant do this anymore.I have no trust in him...it was horible cause i still wanted him...He said he wanted to marry me...i said its too late....so sad.I was crying so much...and image this.I called my new bf and was CRYING to him cause i broke it off with my ex....GOD!!!!I actually did that..and he was supporting me!!!WOW!!!
These 4 years ive been thinking about my ex nearlly everyday.I found out after we broke up he met months after a girl and married her and had a baby-as i did to_Our kids are the same age....
I always imagine what i would feel if i ran into him again....It stil hurt so much.I have a dram about him every night.,Last night too...
I have a lovely family so WHY is it still in my mind.?its 4 years but still it makes me cry......
 
Love is a strange and powerful thing. It hasn't got any rationality or reason. I guess you were young and free at the time, so thinking about him takes you back to the part of your life where you were gallivanting from country to country and having a brilliant time.

Just remember that you made the right choice. I bet you that he is still the same, and his wife is sitting indoors on her own, crying and depressed with a 2 year old to look after, while he is still out all night and being a bastard. I bet you that they are all unhappy.

You have to try your best let him go. xxxxxxxxx
 
never thought of it like that, remembering him does take me back to lovely years so free and just living to have fun.Plus me having a baby was not programed and i had the worst time ever exepting it.It happened so quick aswell.One day i was me free then nect day i had a baby inside that i wasnt ready at the time.So he IS the last link to my old life, that i find myself to miss a lot sometimes.Cause we dont really go out anymore , and money isnt good , everyday problems ect....
His wife DID find me on facebook.She asked me how he treated me.,,,so i knew something wasnt right there.she asked me if i loved him back then and if i have spoken to him from our break up and i was honest about it all exept the way he treated me.I just said we broke up cause i was jealous.I thought that saying the truth would cause problems, im sure he hasnt said the truth about our relationship.so causing problems ,would have kinda put him back in my life and i didnt want that.
He got through to a mutual friend after his wife found me and asked our friend for my number cause he wanted to call to tell me to STAY OUT of his life...i was so angry.I sent him a message on facebook telling to shut his mouth if he doesnt know the facts , and i DIDNT want to have anything to do with him!she found me and asked so many question , i said he should thank me for not telling her what a bastard he was!
Ok now im all worked up for bedtime!!!Hope i'll calm down with nip tuck!
Thanks overtherainbow for your answer,it gave me a new way to see this cause its bugging me a lot.
 
so another day gone!
Yesterday was not good....it started out well i knew what i was having low cal foods but we suddwnly had to leave go to my mother in laws home so ate her food...then i ate icecream 380 calories,,,oh did i feel guilty after...the i ate again,,,,generally it was bas.Tryed to control the damage as much as i could and just thought that whats done is done and decided to let it go and not get depressed...It seems im having more bad days as time passes.
This happens and then i stop.But i havent stopped.I m still trying
Today i had for lunch chicken in a red sause and something i dont know what is called in english.its like pasta...something like that.Not a lot,with some green salad.Then i had my yoghurt and im going to have a couple of carrots in a while cause im getting hungry.
I took my boy to the park today and 2 of my friends noticed i have lost weight!Felt really good also cause my clothes are fitting better not tight as before,and also yesterday i went out in a pair of trousers that just didnt fit 2 months ago!!!
SO im keeping all the good things in mind and continuing!if i put on a kg from these bad days i'll just not allow this to happen again.I've got in my head the thought that i WONT put on kilos with a little cheating.I hope im right,,,it will show in a few days to a week!
 
Her getting in touch with you and asking you weird questions says it all... He isn't making her happy either. And you should be glad you are well shot of him! I think his panicked reaction to her getting in touch was definitely one of a man who has been bullshitting.

I had an ice cream moment earlier on as well. We are great for not letting these little slip ups get us off track! And wooooohoooooo, you are getting compliments from people and clothes are fitting again! Well done! It won't be long till they're baggy :)

And as for the bad days, did you eat more than 2200 calories? Thats my bmr, so yours is probably round about the same. If you didn't eat more than that you won't put any weight on.
 
BMR is 1674

to maintain 2595
and to loose a kg a week 1495....
I have no idea how many cals i had.Just the icecream and my coffe..that alone was nearrly 500...
Even if i do put on some weight i.m ok with that, i made mistake and will pay the price!!!:)
Cant wait for baggy clothes!!!!
i want to reach 65 kg.Dont think i've ever been that light....dont know what i'll look like.If i need more i'll do more.But i'll see when i gt there its still faaaaar away.
I was thinking of 4kg a monthX6 months is 24 kg...add 1 extra month cause of downfalls and little cheats i hope to reach my goal by the begining of the January 2012!
 
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