Cate's Diary

Rebel lee said:
Yea it happens like that.
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.....but it shouldn't.
Trusylver said:
you will get through it, your tough :)
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I'm not though Tru. I will get through it though, but with some collateral damage. My sister wonders if our son's GF is not preparing to ditch our son. I hope not.
LaMaria said:
Sounds to me like D´s GF was feeling raw yesterday and she had a bit of a meltdown. That´s not your fault. We all have our weak spots and hang-ups and they´re not for other people to fix. Maybe in her past relationship(s?) she really was often compared to exes. Maybe D´s troubles with his his kids´ mom mean he mentions her more often than his GF would like and she interprets that in the light of past experiences. Some MILs really are nasty. Combine that with the misogyny soaking through our history and a stereotype arises which makes you the focus of her anxiety. None of that is your fault and I´m very sorry you were caught in the mess.
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Apparently, D's GF (T) had really bad relationships with her previous in-laws. Her first husband committed suicide. I know that I am copping the brunt here & I understand that it may not have been avoidable. Stereotypes sure do exist. I have tried always not to be one of "those" mothers-in-law. It hurts to be misunderstood so badly. D's GF has not had an easy life & I feel for her. She must feel very insecure. The name that was mentioned from 5 years ago was a woman D had a relationship with for a year or so after he had split with the mother of the 3 children. He seemed very smitten with her but she had ended the relationship saying she couldn't see herself with him because of his children. I did not like her much as I sensed she didn't really love him.
I really hate drama & I hate feeling so emotional. I think I was so upset yesterday because it felt like T was trying to drive a wedge between D & us & that is hurtful. It felt like history repeating itself. His wife was very jealous of how well he got on with us. It's disappointing that, no matter what you do or say, some people will believe what they want to believe.
On a bright note, I have had a good day. I tried wheelbarrowing some topsoil, but that was too hard, so have polished off a book & spoke to my sister, cooked some baked veg for dinner & have stuck to my fast for the day without too much trouble.
 
cate said:
I tried wheelbarrowing some topsoil, but that was too hard
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:) I remember helping my parents in the garden as a kid and never wanting to admit something was too heavy for me. Capsized a full wheelbarrow several times :p Filling it up halfway can definitely save time in the long run.
 
I had only half filled it LaMa :blush5: but I was knackered by the time I got it up to the garden. Our land is steep! Next time I'll use the ute & fill small buckets.
 
Steep inclines make it a LOT harder! If you can use the car that´d make it a lot easier of course. In some cases a lighter wheelbarrow/harder tires can also help.
 
I think it's a job for our motorised wheelbarrow, ie the ute.

G & I are going out to do a couple of hours work at the golf club. We didn't go out Friday as it was rainy & freezing, but there are a couple of little jobs we want to do. There is a toilet up the back of the course & no-one is responsible for cleaning it. I give it a rough old clean when I go usually & when we do the rubbish, but I opened up the cupboard last week to get a paper towel roll out & the cupboard is full of rat poo. UGH. I have a bucket & scrubbing brush, gloves etc & while I'm doing that job, G is going to clean out a couple more drains.
We have decided that we will do more good actually doing work at the club, rather than being on a committee. We also then feel that we are helping the club & pulling our weight, without all the stress.

I fasted yesterday. I read 5:2 again yesterday & feel much better about giving it another go. I did feel really good when I was doing it a couple of years ago. One of my 2 days will be a Tuesday, the other either Thursday or Saturday. I find it much easier to do a fast if G is playing golf.
 
cate said:
There is a toilet up the back of the course & no-one is responsible for cleaning it. I give it a rough old clean when I go usually & when we do the rubbish, but I opened up the cupboard last week to get a paper towel roll out & the cupboard is full of rat poo. UGH. I have a bucket & scrubbing brush, gloves etc & while I'm doing that job, G is going to clean out a couple more drains.
We have decided that we will do more good actually doing work at the club, rather than being on a committee. We also then feel that we are helping the club & pulling our weight, without all the stress.
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Let me just say that if you prefer dirty toilets and rat poo to being on a committee that committee is probably not worth being on :p
 
LaMa- I actually laughed out really loud & then had to explain to G. Bloody funny, but right!
 
cate said:
We didn't go out Friday as it was rainy & freezing,
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Ohhh I'd love that. I'm sooo on the wrong side of the planet.
It's not so bad here because when we buy a calender it's really cheap. I think it has something to do with our calendars having only three pages. January- February- and Hot.... ;)
 
Hi, Rebel-I love having all four seasons too, even though it sounds like I'm complaining. Ours was a colder than usual Winter this year, but it never gets stinking hot in Summer & I am very grateful for that.
We have some Kale, Spinach, 2 different sorts of lettuces, lots of herbs( parsley, mint, thyme, rosemary, pineapple sage, sage, chives....), but that's it for the moment. We have 2 empty raised beds to plant out soon & then the 2 large raised beds that we have to fill with dirt etc. I fancy growing lots of spring onions, tomatoes(too early yet), zucchinis, carrots, .........I just see what seedlings are available usually & what I fancy at the time. We were going to get out there & get some dirt today, but it's not looking likely now. Our ute is not a 4 wheel drive & slips & slides when it is wet. Oh, well.It will get done soon hopefully.

I have made the decision to go with the Fast Diet (5:2) for now as I feel much better when I do it. I'll just have to get through the initial cranky stage until my brain gets used to it. It seemed to work better on Saturday & I think that was because I was more physically active. I was active in short bursts, rather than continuously. I am going to do another one tomorrow. I snacked on celery & Lebanese cucumber which helped I think, instead of my usual broth until dinner-time. Then I ate dinner a little later & was not hungry. I now have 8 kg to lose, instead of the 5, but one has gone after 1 fast. I don't care if it was fluid. It still showed on the scales & I was horrified. It was the highest I have weighed for 10 years. It has to go.

I think my 3-4 weeks of eating 3-4 slices of bread with gluten so that I could be tested did the trick of moving my weight up so fast. I had not eaten gluten for almost 10 years. The tests showed that I am most likely not Coeliac, but I am steering well clear of wheat again forever. This last month gave me that old fat as a pig feeling again & I am not going back there!

I am still not over the crazy reaction to nothing of D's GF. G & I were going to take our grandson & his GF, along with D & his GF out to a fancy restaurant to celebrate him changing his name by deed poll to our surname. We gave him the choice. He was excited when we said we would go to this place as he had also said "It's quite expensive."
Now his GF has split with him & D's GF, who also happens to be our grandson's now ex GF's mother (I know, it sounds so Brady bunch) seems to have a weird idea that I think she's not good enough for D. This is just SO wrong. I thought they had seemed very right for one another.
I haven't let on to our grandson that I know he's been dumped, but I did say maybe we had better have a nice dinner up at our house to celebrate instead. It all bloody sucks. He's such a lovely kid. I'll give that some more thought I think. How much can change in just one week!
 
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Sorry to hear about the trouble with your son's girlfriend. This happens in families all the time. People get strange ideas into their head for whatever reason. It's happened in my own family as well, always bizarre. It's her own insecurities coming out Cate, there's really nothing you did wrong.

All I would say is to tread carefully. You don't want to push it and cause a further wedge between you, especially because your son will side with his partner - that's the way it goes in these situations. I would say just be kind and give her a bit of time and it should blow over. It is very frustrating and upsetting, but better to treat it as a minor hiccup rather than a massive deal and it should all settle down quicker.
 
Yesterday it was foggy & rainy & I suggested to G we go out somewhere so we did. We ended up buying a queen sized bed for the spare room, a jump starter for his old ute, some grocery shopping & then a ate a Chinese lunch.
When we got home we had some serious rearranging to do. Then we took the 2 old single beds down to D's & he will either keep them for his kids or sell them. The bed is being delivered this morning. Then I'll have another job making it up.
I woke this morning in such an anxious state. Does anyone else do that? It was about buying the bed (was it the right one?) feeling anxious & upset about the situation with T, you name it really.........I felt like I was on a runaway train! I made myself calm down, but it's a horrible feeling. I must have some exercise clothes handy so that I can toss them on & go for a walk next time. Anything I got out would have woken G & I didn't want to do that.
R has bought himself another car. This is the 3rd one so far & he is yet to get a drivers licence. He doesn't drive them. Hopefully, this time he will actually follow through & get his licence.
 
The bed arrived & was put together for a mere $15. That's money well spent as it took him 30 minutes:)
It looks really good, so I can relax. I did lots of housework this morning so am getting my steps up. I just did a little shopping- got a QS comforter set, so I can make the bed up when I get home. G is playing golf & it's raining. I might go out there now as some of them will abandon!
 
LaMaria said:
I didn´t know you were expecting royalty!

Anxiety sucks.
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It was high time we invested in a decent bed for visitors. It looks really nice! I rang my sister & told her I had bought her a new bed. :D I have to make sure it stays fragrance-free! It can be yours too, LaMa, if you care to visit one day :)
I also sent my sister a present today. It was her birthday on the 9th & I thought I was going to be going over to stay with her for her birthday, but when I asked her a month ago, she hummed & harred & put me off. I let her off as we have an honesty understanding. She has admitted that she was then disappointed that she had as we would have had a lovely time. She was worried that her house wouldn't be tidy enough for me!

I sent her a dark green sari that I bought in Sri Lanka, some SL green tea, a dark green silk scarf & a dark green pair of ear-rings, a badge that says "Best sis in the world" & a raincoat that belonged to our mother, that fits her. As you can tell, my sister's favourite colour, is dark green. :)
 
Thank you very much for the invitation, Cate! I'm not much of a traveler but Tasmania is definitely on my bucket list and has been forever (alongside Madagascar). Also: I like your sister :)
 
LaMaria said:
Thank you very much for the invitation, Cate! I'm not much of a traveler but Tasmania is definitely on my bucket list and has been forever (alongside Madagascar). Also: I like your sister :)
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I mean it. You will always be welcome. All you need to do is get here. Then I can take you around, and/or you could borrow my car & head off on your own.
You would love my sister. You have so much in common that it is ridiculous!
 
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