Cate's Diary

Great!! Have a ball Cate! Thanks for your well wishes...I'm better now..not perfectly healed up, but better! I'll be away on a business trip for a couple of weeks, so I won't be around much either...so we'll catch up when I get back!

Sarah
 
Kate- Hi sweets. I am so happy for your 4lb loss!! I had such a good week-end that I am almost incapable of typing. I just rang & post-phoned my Naturopath's ap't (again) as I really, really want a day at home!!!! (I'm now going Wed, instead of Tues.) I don't think I have the energy to tell you all about it today as I only just got back from doing the bar at a function at the golf club that ended up being twice as long as we thought it would be. I'm knackered!! I am also not starting my own personal challenge today because we missed out on lunch & shopping for ourselves etc. I think I'm going to leave it until next Monday because this week feels really crazy. Too much on. I'll be good though, but just not 1200 calories a day etc. I need to recover from the w/e slowly I think. I am so happy about you getting so close to your goal weight. You're a darling!! xoxo Cate


Rachel- I am glad that I mentioned my friend who has PCOS. Her diary is on here if you want to check it out. Her online name was Kannadew. When I said she changed her life she sure did. She visited me here in Tasmania & we got on very well. She is now married & really happy with her life. She is absolutely lovely! I won't wish you luck with your weigh-in because if you are following Cohen's 100% you will lose weight & get to your goal. That much I am certain about. Thank you for visiting my diary. I had a GREAT w/e & am stuffed! Cheers for now, xo Cate
 
I changed my mind when I woke up this morning, feeling really gluggy from the week-end & decided to cut down to 1200 today. I won't weigh myself as I DON"T WANT TO KNOW! I did fairly well, eating-wise, at the week-end but hardly got any exercise. I had a great week-end but it was also quite strange & a little embarrassing. I think, rather than trying to put it in order I'll just dot point it. I'm still really tired.

* A young woman I hadn't seen for about 10 years came up & chatted to me & told me she hadn't recognised me at all, until she heard me speak. I forget that I look different.

* I think about 10 people said how good I look over the week-end.

* A very big-breasted & voluptuous young woman who was really being ogled by all of the men with me(our 8-ball team but not my sons) late on Saturday night came on to me very strongly & I really had to physically hold her off. I mean I really had to. She was trying to snog me passionately & just couldn't believe that I wasn't interested. I got the impression she wasn't used to knock-backs. She sort of unfolded her humungous breasts out of her dress as well, looking me in the eye, before going back to her friends. It became a topic of conversation on Sunday in the pool hall as they all reckon I had more chances than they did! (Me- :blush5: times about 1,000!!) My LH also told them about a time in Vietnam when a H'Mong woman tried chatting me up & got angry when I knocked her back. I had actually forgotten about that! I really don't know why this happens but can only put it down to the fact that I am friendly. Weird! At least I know, for a fact, that I have no leanings that way.

*We all went out to an Italian restaurant late on Sat. night & all the others ate pizza & I just had a small dessert.

* On the drive back home yesterday the others ate Maccas & my LH & I just had a soft serve(only 150 cals)

* I drank copious quantities of alcohol on Sat but woke up feeling ok on Sunday. LUCKY!!

* I danced for a while with my YS late on Sat night unselfconsciously, even though they probably thought I was a cougar!

* Our 8-ball team played really well to get to the finals & we were the underdogs by a long shot. It was great watching my LH, OS & YS in the same team & it was exciting & lots of fun! We just missed out on making the final but the team who won it were friends of ours & also underdogs. The team that expected to win were quite arrogant & we are all happy with the result.


I am so tired after the week-end that I post-phoned my Naturopath's ap't (again) to tomorrow. I am just spending the day at home today. :biggrin:


Kate has inspired me to kick my own butt & get down closer to my GW.

Lots and lots of love to all, xoxoxo Cate
 
After just one day of eating really well I'm already feeling really good. I weighed this morning & I'm 80kg so that's ok. Phew!! I'm really going to work on losing the next 3kg. My next mini goal is 77kg & I would love to be down to that by my birthday, but that is only 6 weeks away. I could do it but I am trying to lose weight without my LH worrying (ie I'm not telling him what I want to get down to-72kg) so I don't want it to be too obvious, so can't be too fast. I will have to be patient. Each kg that I drop will be great!


I'm off to Launceston today (120km return) to see Inga, my naturopath & my LH is coming with me & organising some trophies, while I'm there. We may just come home & have lunch as we have to go out to an AGM tonight(80km return) & then go watch our YS & friends play off in an 8-ball GF(22km return.) I think coming straight home this afternoon & resting may be a very good idea.


Being 80kg, after a big w/e was such a relief. I was that before I went!

Hope all are well. Love to you all xoxo Cate
 
Omg i cant imagine how uncomfortable that would of been,getting hit on so obvious by that woman~~~~!!!!!WOW HOT CATE~~~~!!!!!!!


How did it feel getting compiments by all those people?Was it ok?a little embarassing or did it make you mad?


I think you are GREAT for not having Pizza and naughty stuff when you could of done it and have the excuse that it was only a fun weekend!~!!!!!oh gosh.....understandind that FOOD doesnt make the FUN!!!!!!.............now thats a challenge for me...I seem to forget it some times! i might have lost a few kilos and i might not be 100kgs anymore but my mind is defiatly still thinking fat most of the times...

Why dont you want your LH to see you loose weight fast.Ok i now its not a good thing but you mentioned you dont want him to worry.I think that your approach to weightloss is the best cause its not a quicky and then fall back to old habbits.Its a real big life change,i like it a lot.


Dont you have any before pics?I am really curious to see your before.I saw you on your new pic you are really pretty and sweet face cate!Love reading your updates aswell!Love and hugs hot mamma!!!!!:p
 
Originally Posted by jasper


Omg i cant imagine how uncomfortable that would of been,getting hit on so obvious by that woman~~~~!!!!!WOW HOT CATE~~~~!!!!!!!



How did it feel getting compiments by all those people?Was it ok?a little embarassing or did it make you mad?



I think you are GREAT for not having Pizza and naughty stuff when you could of done it and have the excuse that it was only a fun weekend!~!!!!!oh gosh.....understandind that FOOD doesnt make the FUN!!!!!!.............now thats a challenge for me...I seem to forget it some times! i might have lost a few kilos and i might not be 100kgs anymore but my mind is defiatly still thinking fat most of the times...

Why dont you want your LH to see you loose weight fast.Ok i now its not a good thing but you mentioned you dont want him to worry.I think that your approach to weightloss is the best cause its not a quicky and then fall back to old habbits.Its a real big life change,i like it a lot.



Dont you have any before pics?I am really curious to see your before.I saw you on your new pic you are really pretty and sweet face cate!Love reading your updates aswell!Love and hugs hot mamma!!!!!:p

Jess, I can cope well with compliments these days, when I feel that they are well-meaning. I don't get mad any more or embarrassed. It was always the loud "OMG Look at you!" comments that used to make me cringe. They still would. Re: getting hit on by that girl. I think I was in shock more than anything but was more uncomfortable the next day when teased about it by some of the others. It was the topic of conversation for a while & I was blushing furiously! At least I know for a fact that I'm not bi or gay!

Re: The not having pizza. I am definitely getting over the idea that food=fun. I love food, don't get me wrong, but I love feeling slim a whole lot more! If I am going to have something "naughty" it has to be fantastic & then I'm only going to have a small serve of it anyway. That's what French women do apparently.

I don't want my LH thinking that I am obsessed with getting slimmer for a couple of reasons. Many years ago I became really obsessed with losing weight & got really skinny (for me) & looked gaunt & horrible. He loves me any way that I am, but he really dislikes unhealthily thin people. He actually shudders. I'm a bit the same. I think that there's a big difference between being healthily slim & thin. That's why I react to the word as it has unhealthy connotations to me. It does feel so good to feel happy in my own skin these days & not to feel fat any more. I am noticing that I feel much more confident again in public. Losing this 6.5kg again has made me feel heaps better about myself. I want to get down to 72kg as I know that will be my perfect weight & I don't think I have been at that weight for any longer than 2 months, since I was a teenager.

I will put on a couple of before pics. I just took a photo of a photo of me huge but actually looking quite nice & will put it on later.

Jess, I know you're not feeling great at the moment but I really appreciate you visiting my diary & being so sweet. xoxoxo Cate
 
AHeya Cupcake :)

I totally understand why you don't say anything to your LH. I am kinda the same with Mark. He hasn't expressed any negative opinions about me going too far but i can tell that it does freak him out from time to time. For example, last night while snuggling up in bed he put his arm over and around me and it went right around me and i can't remember what he said but he was like 'bloody hell skinny'. He hasn't told me to stop and he knows what my goal is but i know that its odd for him so i don't really say anything to him anymore.

Ooh glad i have inspired you.....Well, saying that i have failed today :( i have needed evil food and am having a slight 'fuck it' evening cos i'm home alone with no body to stop me. It's only one evening and i will be super awesome for the rest of my blast!!
 
Hi sweets, Isn't it funny but that's when I feel the slimmest- when someone hugs me or I hug them. Once upon a time it would have been impossible for anyone to wrap their arms around me. It must take our men some time to get used to how we are now, just as it takes us so long to get used to our new selves. I am being careful not to get him worried about me. Also I think that, while I know he is proud of what I have achieved, I think, surely, he must be sick of hearing me talking about food & worrying about my weight. It's best to do the fine-tuning quietly I think. It's lateish & I'm quite tired. I had a good day today, including taking Mum out for lunch. She has been really good again & her mind seems to have snapped back again. I'll enjoy that while I can.

Lots of love, xoxo Cate
 
Brrrr!!! It has turned COLD almost instantly & we now have the fire going. Last week- Summer weather, this week -snow on the mountains. BRRR!!!!

I have been changing vitamins etc as advised by Inge, my Naturopath & am trying to cut down meds. as well. I went to the doctor yesterday & got a new script for my BP meds & a puffer & asked him about reducing my cholesterol meds. He wants me to stay on all at least until the end of this year when he'll do some more testing. I really want to reduce the cholesterol one at least & may just cut down a little. I won't just yet though.

I was taking a laxative every night & she has given me a gentler one plus a herbal mixture for IBS. I have long thought that I have IBS. I have had constipation problems since having my first child, 31 yrs ago. :eek:

I was also taking a 10mg Phenergan at night, for both my hayfever & allergies, but know that I am probably hooked on it too as it ensures a really sound sleep:sleeping:

I do want to stop taking it & the strong laxative so am giving it a go.


Jess has asked me to put a photo up in here of me when I was big & I don't have many digital photos of my friends so I have started taking photos of photos & am working my way up to recent years. I'll get there Jess. I have one of me HUGE at a friend's wedding but it is so embarrassing :blush5: & I would need a lot more courage than I have today to put that one up. I'll find a better one I think. I promise I'll get there!


Golf lessons- I got a call the other day asking me if I wanted to join some others in getting some golf lessons out at our local club & I said yes. I have felt SICK about it ever since & really wish I could get out of it easily. I turn into a nervous wreck when people are watching me & it's making me feel really anxious. I don't want to play with the women even if I do like it & feel that I might be any good at it at all. They mostly wear loads of perfume & can be so bitchy.


Exercise- Since dropping my cals to 1200 I am having trouble keeping to it without doing exercise. I MUST get on my bike every day!!!

Feeling a little weird & anxious today so will scoot. I felt really good yesterday so can't quite work it out. It may be that I'm just not sleeping as soundly. Hopefully that will improve. I am much more aware of dreaming lots & have woken up with a song in my head in the middle of the night a few times. I guess that should be a good sign! It has only been 2 nights without Phenergan.

Love to all, xo Cate
 
Kept to within 1200 yesterday, but only just. To do so I had to ride my stationary bike twice (11.25km total) & go for a 30 min walk. I'm finding it a bit hard & think about food most of the day, which is something I don't want to do any more. I'll finish up a week & then maybe change back to 1lb a week so 1420 cals a day. It will be interesting to weigh on Tuesday. I don't think I have lost anything. I feel better this morning & had got better as the day went on yesterday. I spoke to my sister for about an hour & a friend of Mum's rang & spoke for ages! She's probably half way between Mum & I in age. She had rung Mum a few weeks ago & thought Mum wasn't interested in talking to her at all & wondered if she should ring back. I was able to reassure her by explaining Mum had a bad week after my sister went home & she probably rang then. Also Mum doesn't like talking on the phone much any more so if she keeps a list of things to tell her about their friends etc & not talk for too long, Mum should enjoy it. She's very nice & has been a good friend to mum & really misses her.

My LH is home for the day & we will have a bit of a lazy one I think. Maybe.

I'll pop back later to see if anyone is about. Lots of love, xoxo Cate
 
Had a really nice day with my LH today. We gardened & read & had a nice day at home. I kept within my calories....just but it is a bit of a struggle. Speaking of a struggle- I keep falling asleep tonight & am going to have an early night. Tomorrow is the dreaded golf lesson. I'm trying really hard to tell myself it should be fun!! GAH!! It should be fun, it should be fun. If I don't enjoy it I don't have to go again or play golf at all. I have to stop being nervous of new things!

I have spent ages today sorting out photos. I still haven't found one I want to share on here from when I was really big. Truth is, I hid from the camera & also ripped up lots of photos of me. There is one on FB that embarrasses the living daylights out of me, but I'm not sure I can bring myself to share it here.

Waffling on, so will scoot!

Love to all, xoxo Cate
 
I cannot believe how much I enjoyed my golf lesson today. I mean I REALLY loved it!! It gave me such a buzz! My LH says that I am already better than 1/3 of the women at his club. I'm in shock. I wasn't nervous or self-conscious, I was really encouraged by it all. At the end of the lesson the women's captain offered to play a few holes & I even parred a hole! I am in shock! WOWSERS! FUN!! Goose, for being so negative about it. Goose for thinking I would be bloody hopeless! I overheard my LH saying to the women's captain that I am a natural at sport. I'm amazed he remembers. It seems like another life away that I was sporty. I so love that man! One thing that was huge for me was that I was not even body aware. Not at all. I hit the ball better when the pro was right behind me, watching me & I wasn't even slightly self-conscious. This is one of my biggest break-throughs since I lost weight. As I said, I'm in shock!! I feel like singing from a roof-top. I AM OVER IT!!!
 
Kate you have it in you!Even if it seems that it was another life time ago you have the sport spirit in you!!!!!I feel your enthousiasm over your golf course!!!!!I also think what your LH said was so nice,he felt proud of you !!!!



You say you find it hard to stay at 1200 cals.And to do so you have to ride your bike.So im guessing you eat more cals than 1200 get on your bike and burn it of?It has always troubled me if we should eat our exercise cals or not?im really interested in you telling me your opinion about this.It sometimes feels that if i eat my burnt balories i didnt work out.......silly?


And Kate its ok really i know how it is to feel shy about posting a before pic.I used to be like that,i used to hide from the camera as well but i got passed that luckily.I now dont feel shy about my weight i was.When you feel ok about it and find one that doesnt make you feel akward post it sweetie!You look so pretty now in your profile pic,anyway,i have a picture of you in my head now!!!!
 
AHeya Cupcake :)

Sorry, i haven't visited your diary for a few days :( I just don't seem to find the time at the moment!

I too have constipation problems but i am doing really well recently (other than my bloating problems today but i reckon that has something to do with Ben & Jerry!!) i eat 2-3 kiwi's a day cos someone told me that they really help, also i have a spoonful of linseeds in my yoghurt every day (i put them in in the morning and eat it at lunch time) someone else told me about that. It really makes a difference for me :) It might be worth a try, i can't remember the last time i took a laxative and i use to have to have them every day.

Doing 1200 for only a week is a good idea. I really struggled with it after that length of time. Maybe doing it every so often is good to stop us stagnating. Uping them is good :)

:hurray: :hurray: I am so so pleased that you loved your golf lesson!!! that is soooooooo good to hear, especially seeing as you were really dreading it :) And PARR!!!! you rock hun :hurray:
Your LH is a total star :) I totally get what you mean about not being body aware, that is one thing i really enjoy now, knowing that i don't stand out and i dont worry when i am around people i haven't met before cos they dont know i was huge. It really is a wonderful feeling isn't it :)

So so chuffed for you my lovely. That really is a biggey isn't it. I am sat here with a huge grin on my face. So proud of you Cupcake :beating:
 
Jess- This photo is for you sweets. I love you gals! I think that it's good to include the calories burned during exercise in your daily diary, but it is not compulsory to actually eat what your application says you can. I only put in vigorous exercise, not incidental & I underestimate, rather than exaggerate it. I don't eat then do exercise to burn off the food, but rather I often put in what I am going to be eating that night for dinner, including wine & then exercise extra if I need to, so that I can have what I want that night. 1200 cals has me thinking & worrying about food all day but 1420 doesn't. I need to have a good balance in my life so am going back to 1420 today. When I stay under that I feel good, when I go over 1200 I feel bad & then feel like eating things I shouldn't. I think we all know it's a head game so we should do what suits us individually to get to where we want to be. So sorry sweetie that you are having so many personal problems in your relationship. Would it help to share it with us? I'm here to listen sweetie. Thanks for being so positive toward me & so encouraging, when you're feeling down. That's very sweet of you. Sending you lots of hugs & kisses, xoxo Cate


Kate- I am still over the moon about the golf & can't really believe it! My LH is now talking about me playing in the women's comp & playing with him in mixed foursomes comps etc. (nothing like Rox's! :smilielol5: ) I do love him to bits. He was so excited & thrilled for me last night. I could see how proud he was & he is so encouraging. I will have to tell him to ease off being too technical though. I just want to go with the flow with the lessons & not try to learn too much at once so that it is not too daunting. I noticed that I did surprise the others with the distance I could hit it. The pro said something to me about my swing being really good & not needing much help so he spent much more time with all of the others. He also said my LH had better watch out or I'll be beating him. :blush5: It was so much fun! I now realise that you don't have to be perfect at it or even fantastic, just do the best you can, don't lose the plot, relax & have FUN!!


I am def. going to gradually reduce the laxatives & the ones Inge sold me are very gentle so I will take them for a while & then wean myself off them. My system has become lazy & needs to get it's arse into gear! :smilielol5:Litererally! I have a feeling it was me (or Joh or both of us) that said about the kiwi fruit, especially if you also eat the skin. They have been awful here for a while & I'm looking forward to the new season's. Eating apples with the skin on helps too. I think I have been addicted to going at a certain time each morning & miss that when I don't take them. I'll get over it! I am managing a good night's sleep without Phenergan, which has surprised me. I wake up very snuffly so took a non-drowsy anti-histamine last night, but it didn't make much difference so may not bother tonight. Reducing any medication that I can has to be a good thing.


The not being at all self conscious of my body was such a biggie for me, that I was still mentally dancing last night & still am today. Kate, you really do make me smile with your encouragement & enthusiasm! It is great to share our experiences & thoughts so freely & to get such positive & encouraging reactions & comments in return. It makes me feel even more loved than I already do. I really do love my forum friends! I'm so lucky! Hugs to you sweets, xoxo Cate.


Weight- Back up to 81kg, but I know it can't be fat. I missed lunch yesterday & grabbed a packet of gluten-free chips(372 cals whole 75g packet, which my LH ate some of) from the wholefoods shop, which were delicious but very salty, of course. I kept to within my cals yesterday but am positive that I am retaining fluid. Next week I'll take a gf sandwich with me to my lesson & a piece of fruit. I should always take lunch with me whenever I am away from home at lunch-time. I should never skip lunch! Breakfast is a given. I wouldn't even contemplate skipping that.


Time to move on to emails etc. Lots and lots of love to all, xoxo Cate
 
Didn't have a good day eating-wise as I had too much last night after dinner. I think it was a silly reaction to weighing more in the morning or having too little for lunch (no protein-bad) or slight nerves as our OS has invited himself up for dinner tonight with his GF. The fact that he has done so means it's becoming a bit more serious I think. I'm not sure how I feel about her. I certainly don't blame her for their marriage break-up, it's just that I have never really taken to her. She's so girly and giggly, which I don't think I have ever been. If he thinks enough of her then I will really try to see her good points. They have been friends for years and years.

Oh...the head game with weight. I'm right again today I think, but had a bad night's sleep & have a full-on day today with Tai Chi mothers, then dinner tonight here. I might try to squeeze in a "Nana nap" this afternoon.

I also have asthma & figure it's being a bit anxious. I did have a good exercise day yesterday thank goodness.

Bye for now, xoxo Cate
 
Woke early again & couldn't get back to sleep. The power has been out for about half an hour now as well & I might try crawling back into bed. Last night was a bit weird with our OS & his GF. We both felt that she is fairly silly & seems way younger than 27. I'm not sure how serious he is about her but won't worry as there's no point. Perhaps she was nervous around us, I don't know.

I went over my cals for the day, but it was all planned, so that's ok.

Had a fairly full-on day, but managed a "nanna nap" in the afternoon. I hope I can get back into sleeping well again soon, without reverting back to taking Phenergan. I miss my good night's sleep!

The lights just came back on so I might do some exercise instead.

Bye for now, xoxo Cate
 
Hi Cate! Glad to see a familiar face around from the old forum days. I never posted any pics and I didn't post much then but saw you a lot throughout Alta's diary.

I have lots of reading to catch up on as I stopped coming around the forums when they were upgraded.

I even deleted my dairy from back then and started a new one just a day ago.


So it's catch up time for me on your diary!


Just wanted to say hello at least until then!
 
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