Cate's Diary

Hi Cate, Sounds like you have been having a rough couple of days :( Sorry to hear, but glad to hear that they upped your offer on the house and you got what you wanted for it. You brother does sound a bit like that word you called him ar!#&%le :). I think we all have days when we feel underappreciated. It's part of being a wife and mother. Everyone takes us for granted at some time or other, but I'm sure they all know just how lucky they are to have you and would be lost without you.

I'm still struggling to get properly back on track but hoping that today might just be the day. I haven't gained any weight, but also haven't lost any more. It's like something goes off in my head saying "almost under 100kg, better saboutage yourself", so it's been up, down, for the last couple of weeks.

Hoping for a good day and then a good week.

Take care Cate


Talk soon

Beck :)
 
Beck- Hi & thanks for your supportive post. I know that I typed in here yesterday but the Internet was so slow and I must have got out before it was submitted! My Mum thinks my brother is a saint & is so grateful to him "for all the work he has done to sell the house." ZIP! I won't burst the bubble. It would only be stooping to his level.

Our YS is going through a flat patch as the family are going to open the business 7 days a week, starting next Monday, even though he won't be capable of throwing himself into it. He will just have to do the best he can, under the circumstances, but he sets himself very high standards. We are trying to lift his spirits & give him encouragement & are saying that people will not judge him as he is now. He still has a great hospitable personality but just isn't very mobile. I can understand that they don't want to keep waiting & are getting impatient.

I feel a bit flat myself & my asthma isn't helping. I need to get some exercise today & hopefully that will help. I'll say 'bye for now, love to all, xoxo Cate.
 
Yesterday- was a taste of Spring! It was a beautiful, sunny day, with birds flitting about everywhere and I felt good. Today is overcast but my mood from yesterday still lingers. It has been a harsh Winter & I will be glad to see the last of it. Things are settling a little with our son & he has gone for a couple of days so I can do whatever I want, without feeling self-conscious. It's only when someone else is about that I feel that my day must look empty. I don't do the things that I normally do when someone else is here, even when he is a son. Maybe especially when it is a son? I never know what he wants me to do or what he expects as it changes all the time. I was going to be taking him into Launceston tomorrow to see the specialist & we were maybe going down with him to Hobart to get some furniture but he has himself organised with a friend to do that so now my days are free again. I should be happy about that. It's a similar thing to the relationship between me & my Mum & the adjusting of independence. Our son left home 10 years ago.

Today- I decided to have a day at home today & will go pick my Mum up tomorrow & take her up the street. I actually feel a little bored or restless so will have to try to fix that as I don't usually. I'm so reactive to the people around me & some of our YS's melancholy seems to have settled on me. Sunshine sure helps! Come back sunshine!!! Exercise will make a difference too so I will do some housework first, put some music on (North African Groove), hop on my bike & do my weights. That should make me feel good.

Weight- haven't lost any as I haven't been eating Cohen's only & have had wine most nights. Motivation- where are you?

Time to move!!
Sending you all lots of love, xoxo Cate
 
I did lots of exercise yesterday including a walk, 2 sets of weights & some Tai Chi but ate & ate- mostly nuts & fruit, but it was a bit piggy. I seem to have snapped myself out of my fog though but I wonder where these days come from. They're not good. I haven't done that for quite some time. UGH!

A friend is visiting this morning & we are going together to take my Mum out for lunch. She & Mum get on very well & she hasn't seen mum since mum moved to Tassie. I will have a healthy soup for lunch & tonight we are having my Pho Bo so I will make up for my over-eating yesterday. I still feel full from it.

I had better go do some vacuuming & the dishes, before my friend arrives.

Love to all xoxo Cate
 
Ate really healthily & lightly yesterday & consequently feel much better today-

yoghurt/fruit, GF cereal, nuts & seeds for breakfast,

Hungarian Ghoulash soup & gf toast for lunch in town

Pho Bo for dinner, followed by a fruit platter. Drank mostly herbal tea plus 2 coffees. No snacking!!!


My friend arrived early & I hadn't done any vacuuming. Oh well. She doesn't like me for my housekeeping abilities. We went into town, did a little shopping & then picked my mum up & took her out to lunch. We had a lovely time. I don't think mum registered who she was for a while. My friend was really impressed with Mum's hostel & also was happy that mum loves it. She'll come up again & we'll do the same. It was lovely catching up with her.

Later on our YS arrived home with his friend from Hobart & they ended up staying & yacking for a couple of hours. I really liked this friend. Some of his friends are quite crazy but this one was really easy-going & really likeable. It was an enjoyable visit. Our YS seemed much happier too & more relaxed. Like me he is influenced by the company he keeps.

My LH & I went to a meeting in Devonport that night but got home early & relaxed with a fruit platter & a pot of herbal tea.

All in all, a lovely sociable day. No snacking, no pigging out, ate very healthily & today I feel GREAT!!

Love to all. As you can see from my prolific posting today I am feeling the luuurve! :grouphug: xoxoxo Cate
 
Typed a long post about nothing much & then tried adding photos. Hmmm. "Please wait"...........15 mins later I'm still waiting so can't be bothered starting over with my post. I am a beggar for punishment though so will attempt to add a photo again. I am feeling good and it's a beautiful sunny day again!

Love to you all from my little part of paradise. This photo was taken coming back from a walk at the entrance to our place, looking toward our house. I love this big gum tree xo Cate.

SPRING!!!! YAY!!!!SPRING!!!! YAY!!!!
 
Had a fun night last night. We went out for dinner at a Chinese restaurant with a group of friends & our YS & then went to a pub afterward. Most of our friends went & played poker machines (boring zzzz) & we went to the bar & then my LH & our YS had quite a few games of 8-ball (pool.) It was so funny. Some drunken girls were trying to chat our son up but realised that I was his mum & then didn't know what to do. I chatted to them & had a few laughs & then one of them asked me if I wanted her to see "her new ink." I didn't really of course but she proceeded to show me anyway. "I only think they should be in sexy places" she said. Not as bad as it sounds- it was above her bikini line! God it was funny though! Our son is still laughing. We were home by 10pm but had a fun night.

Today- I'm feeling brave so will take mum with me to the market. If it's too much for her I can take her back & then return. It's another beautiful, sunny day.

Lots of love to you all, xoxo Cate

Our 2 lovely sons-
 
I can't even begin to work out why I self-sabotage but needless to say I did yesterday & consequently weigh an extra kilo today. I even had an ice-cream! :banghead:

I'll have to pick myself up & start all over again. I'm disgusted with myself but hopefully I'll get over it!

Nothing good to say so will say nothing else.

xo Cate
 
AAh, darlin, it happens to ALLLLLL of us!!! You have such a great attitude about it - like you say, pick yourself up and start over again. Don't worry about the extra kilo - (I say, haha) - it'll be done in no time.

Meanwhile, where did your substitute ticker go?

Your sons look really lovely - you know how sometimes when you look at a person's face, you can tell they are kind people? They are both like that. :) You must be a good mama!

The pic of "YAY! SPRING!" from your property is gorgeous! How big is your property?
xx
 
Originally Posted by decisionmaker

Ah, darlin, it happens to ALLLLLL of us!!! You have such a great attitude about it - like you say, pick yourself up and start over again. Don't worry about the extra kilo - (I say, haha) - it'll be done in no time.

Meanwhile, where did your substitute ticker go?

Your sons look really lovely - you know how sometimes when you look at a person's face, you can tell they are kind people? They are both like that. You must be a good mama!

The pic of "YAY! SPRING!" from your property is gorgeous! How big is your property?
xx
Click to expand...

You are so sweet Joh! I made up for it during the day yesterday and had yoghurt & fruit for brekkie without any gluten-free cereal or seeds and nuts, a tuna salad for lunch and no snacks at all during the day. Last night we had a dinner to go to at my SIL's and we had a delightful night. I didn't skimp but also didn't over-do it. I enjoyed every morsel! I won't weigh until I have been strict again for a couple of days. No point setting myself up for a gloomy day! I'm going to start today with an hour's exercise daily! Walk & weights it is today.

I found my substitute ticker a little depressing.

Our sons are both really lovely men and they are both very kind. I love this photo. My husband is a darling too! As their mum I do love to hear comments like that. I am very proud of the men that they have become.

I also love where we live. Our home is on 50 acres with mountain views & lots of native bush. We can only "farm" rocks and the wallabies eat the grass & save us lots of work. We have abundant wildlife . I feel like I'm living in heaven!

Lots of love to you Joh, xoxo Cate.
 
Spring has sprung in more ways than one! Hayfever, hayfever & more hayfever! I have just got back from taking our YS into Launceston(120km return trip) then back to take my mum up the street to do a little shopping. She lost her list but I needed eye drops as mine are stinging & itching madly & she said that was on her list. I haven't been home long & am going out to my LH's 8-ball tonight in the opposite direction (80km return) I feel very tired & can't have a day at home on my own until Saturday. zzzzz

Maybe I won't get my old life back so I'll have to adjust. Life's like that!

Love to all, xo Cate
 
Had a wonderful day today! Tai Chi followed by lunch at the pub that our YS is helping run, followed by a big walk out at the golf club. Lovely company, lovely day! Before we went into town this morning we participated in about our 10th annual survey about "Living In Australia" & the interviewer said that we were just about the luckiest people that he knows. I think he means we are about the happiest but I'll take that as a lovely compliment. He's a nice bloke & is about 2 weeks younger than me & is very easy to get on with.

What a delightful day!

Love to all, xoxo Cate
 
Feeling pretty good today & not worried about my weight too much. I know I need to lose about 8kg though, as even if I put on 1kg now, that will make me FREAK but I know I can do it, it's just the committing to actually doing it. Ahhh procrastination! I'm really enjoying my sociable life at the moment. I will try to make up for the eating out by eating extra well at home & not snacking between meals!

Telling myself off doesn't make me feel good though so I will now have to stop that & move on. I am so hard on myself I know.

I had better get on the move as it's such a beautiful day & I have done nothing except potter about on FB etc. I'm wasting precious sunshine!

Bye for now, xoxo Cate
 
I haven't had a great deal to say I suppose. Sometimes life's just like that. Had the 3 grand-kids from Friday morning to yesterday afternoon. Had a great time! Our 5 yr old GD said "Nan, If we're really good can we go to bed early?" You just have to love that, don't you. They went to bed at their usual time, about 7.30pm but unfortunately our 3 yr old GS woke at 6.15am. EEK! He did get up once during the night & went to the toilet, apparently came into our room, but decided not to wake us. NICE.

I took them home to their mother's in the afternoon, then visited my mum and then our YS in the pub he's helping run. I had a glass of wine there & met a couple of friends of his from Hobart. We got talking & they are coming back up in a couple of weeks & joining us for dinner before the live music. I had invited them to join us. I have a feeling that one of the guys who's singing may be her son but I'll ask our son tomorrow when I take him to town again to see another specialist. I have promised Mum that I will take her out for lunch & I will take her to our YS's pub.

My LH & I have had a good day today. We got a load of wood for our OS as we have his ute. I needed it to return the GK's yesterday. He has gone away for a few days. He was quite elusive about where & I'm thinking it may be a romantic tryst (or not.) He has friends everywhere & I don't think he headed for the bush. He is a very private person so I won't ask him.

Hope all are well & happy. Sending you lots of love, xoxo Cate.
 
When I picked up our YS to take him to his appointment he told me that he didn't have to be back until 4pm & he needed to do some shopping so I rang the Hostel where mum lives & asked them to apologise to her about lunch, to eat there & that I would call in & take her up the street when I got back. I felt bad about that but we had a good time in town together. We are getting along really well. It has been 10 years since he left home & it's very different of course.

Mum was OK & I have said we'll go for lunch on Friday. I won't change that unless I'm ill. I am finding it all a little stressful really. I didn't think it would be easy having Mum nearby but I don't think I had realised quite how stressful it could be. She gets so much mixed up & her short-term memory loss is bad. My MIL probably thinks I'm neglecting her as I'm seeing a lot less of her. I don't seem to have much me time any more. I was absolutely exhausted last night. REALLY exhausted! I also have terrible hay-fever.

Today- I am looking after the Gk's for a few hours in the afternoon, while my DIL goes for counselling. Tonight my LH has an 8-ball final.

I have way too much on & I feel that I need a rest but won't be getting one for a while. Tomorrow is Tai Chi day & then lunch, Thur we go to give blood & have dentist's ap'ts, then GS to tae Kwon Do & staying the night, Friday lunch with Mum & shopping, Sat 8-ball comp in Launc, followed by 8-ball GF, if my LH's team wins tonight.

Sunday is my next day home. Monday off to Launc again, taking our YS to an ap't again, Tues home? So Sunday & Tuesday I will have to make sure I stay home & recharge my batteries!

I have no idea what I weigh but I've been eating ok.

Love to all, xoxo Cate
 
Feeling exhausted but not so stressed tonight. Our GS had a friend staying next door so wanted the night off staying here & TKD. I was quite happy about it really as it meant I could relax at home. I have already fallen asleep twice tonight & am going to bed very soon. I must weigh soon & try not to be despondent about it. I know I have put on weight as I weighed more at the blood bank & they could take extra plasma. Mind you I did drink 2 litres of water beforehand! Tired, tired, tired. 'Night all, xo Cate
 
Had a really good night's sleep & woke up feeling much more positive. Never forget the importance of a good night's sleep! It's raining & doesn't look very nice outside but that's ok. I'm taking Mum out to lunch today & not doing much else. I bought her a cupboard yesterday to put her summer clothes in so must go sort them out. I won't take all of them in yet as I don't want it squashed. I'm still in my PJ's. There's no hurry. I'll have a cup of coffee & read for a while, I think, before facing the day.

Love to all, xoxo Cate
 
Forum changes have drastically reduced visits to my diary I have noticed. It feels a bit lonely here!

Yesterday-

I couldn't face sorting out Mum's clothes (ironing & repairs needed) or taking the cupboard & re-arranging Mum's room on my own so took it out of the car & left the clothes at home. She won't need most of them as Tassie summers are always mild in comparison to where she has come from. I went to lunch with Mum & we both had Salmon & salad & I asked for no chips (yay!) I ate one only of Mum's. She wandered up to strangers & just stood there until they took notice of her. Then she asked if they were tourists & told them that she's living in a home and really likes it there & said "She's my mother!" (meaning me) to which they laughed & said I look well for my age. I said "I'm 86" to which Mum said "So am I!" It is sad no matter what spin I try to put on it. At least Mum seems really happy! She's safe and happy & I'm the one who needs to adjust to my new responsibilities. I do get really stressed about her & bit my lip (again) today worrying about her- her room & how I'll re-arrange it, whether I'll swap a stool that's in there that I brought from our home & that doesn't get used to sit on as it's covered in stuff, for a sideboard that our son left here that would be more useful etc. I get really anxious thinking about it all & can't seem to relax about her at all. Hopefully soon!

Today- My LH has been at home with me, which has been lovely. He was meant to play in an 8-ball comp so got someone else to organise golf & then his doubles partner was sick & he decided to spend the day at home. Mostly we have been reading but also did some wood cutting. When we do that I don't worry about anything. Actually when I'm exercising I don't worry either. It is way past time to re-commit to my exercise regime!!!!! I really should go back on Cohen's too to lose some weight quickly & give myself a boost! I could do with both.

Going out tonight to my LH's 8-ball GF. It will be a very late night. His team are the under-dogs. The opposition have won it 9 years running!

Bye for now & love to all, xoxo Cate.
 
AHi darlin'! Where are all your followers? :( Sorry I've been totally self-absorbed lately.

I think it'd be really hard to readjust to a different role now that your mum is with you. It's almost like a reversal of roles, a bit.

Hope your hubby's GF went wellllll!!!! Yay for going for the underdogs! :) xxx
 
Hi sweets, You have the best possible reason to be self-absorbed & I am thrilled for you!! :beating:

250 people have looked at my diary in the last day but rarely do others post in it. It feels a bit weird really. I couldn't give a bugger if they have nothing to do with Cohen's or weight-loss but would like to hear from them occasionally. Oh well. It's the nature of the internet I guess. Many are just lookers obviously & maybe feel they don't have anything to contribute, whereas I love to just say hi to whoever. I'm happy to share my life.

I am so happy that I can share your good news. It's truly wonderful! Life is so good & I can sense your joy & wonder at it all. I remember well how I felt when I first found out that I was pregnant. Are you rubbing your stomach much yet & talking to your baby?

Re: my Mum. It is a role reversal but one in that I have to try not to make it too obvious to her that it is the case. Further down the track it will become more so I think. I really love my mother but I also need to step back gradually & take some more time for myself as I feel that my mental health is suffering.

Re: 8-ball. My LH's team won the grand final & he played the best he has played for years! There was so much bad sportsmanship by the opposition. They tried everything that they could to put us off & we almost walked out at the start as a protest. Our OS & 2 of our team (the best 3 players in our team) were competing in a state event during the day & our 8-ball association refused to change the date of the GF (they stuffed up their 8-ball calendar & the 2 clashed) but the committee had said that they would wait for our players to get there before starting, then reneged on the deal, after our opposition pressured them fiercely. To cut a LONG story short our son & his mate won the state title & then made it to the GF very late, which we then won. It was neck & neck all night. I thought I was going to have a heart attack at one stage. I was SO angry. Not good! I loathe bad sportsmanship and bad behaviour.

A friend of mine, who I have just renewed our friendship via FB, came along to watch & I talked to her for most of the night, which took the edge off a lot of the tension. It was lovely to catch up with her & I think we will stay in touch regularly now. I really like her. Her & her husband used to won a whole food shop in our local town. Her husband has Altzeimers, which is now well advanced & is in care. She gave me lots of good advice re my Mum. One of our players was half trying to chat her up. He was hilarious but I hope she was a little flattered, although I know she was very embarrassed. He's a good guy & never means any harm & is not sleazy or anything. He's so funny. Another Ranga.

I am really tired today & my poor LH had to go off & play in a golf tournament, with a hangover. I had to drive home last night so only had a couple. I drove home through pea-soup fog. I was so relieved to drive into my garage at 2am!

I am going to have a very lazy day today as I'm off to Launc. again tomorrow with our YS. Need to re-charge those batteries!

Love to you Joh xo & love to anyone else reading my diary, xo Cate
 
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