Cate's Diary

Hi Shine-
The warm showers are just lovely! The things we take for granted! For now I am going to stick to Cohen's food but not weighing it so the quantities are greater. In the maintenance guidlines it says that if you ever go back to your original program (ie 100%) for more than 2 weeks, you will need to repeat the full refeeding program. They say your first line of defence if you over indulge is to eliminate all carbs for 48 hrs.
I have lost 1kg already just by cutting out all carbs for one day. Yay! Phew! xo Cate

Hi Kristy-
I'm with you sweets! Because I know my weight was creeping up I will not contemplate over-eating over Christmas. Dropping 1kg in one day from being strict (but still not weighing my food) I feel so much better already. Honestly yesterday morning I felt like a big, fat, pig! I kid you not! I really appreciate you taking the time & the effort Kristy to show me such support, especially as I know you were disappointed about your lunch. I just typed in your diary about it. I think you are doing really well & I am enjoying seeing how you are growing(LOL- not in size!) & meeting challenges head on. Good for you. Be proud of yourself Kristy, xo Cate

BBQ-
Pleased to report that I only ate Cohen's friendly food- no pasta salad, no sausages, no potato salad or fried food & only had one miniature steak as the rest looked fatty. No sweets at all, no alcohol. A la Cohen's!

Weight
Down one kg so now 4.5 over GW & I will keep this up (or should I say down!)

Exercise yesterday-
Was a one hour walk 12.30-1.30, followed by hot shower. Lovely!

Exercise today-
Will be Tai Chi but I might also do my weights when I get home so I get an hour's exercise credit up my sleeve.

I'm feeling so much better just knowing that I have got myself back on track. I got derailed there with my food for a week or so. Truthfully my weight has been creeping up a little at a time because "little treats" were sneaking back in gradually. Little treats grow bigger with time if you let them.
Thanks for your support & for your faith in me folks. Bye for now, Cate
 
Hi Cate,

It's so great to have you here on the forum, you teach me so much about what's to come and how things can be managed in the future... It was my pleasure to show my support, as I said, it makes me feel better to just come in here and read your diary, it is always so refreshing and I really enjoy following your journey!

So glad to hear you're feeling better and already down 1kg just from cutting out the carbs! Wow! Thats really great. Im sorry you felt like a big fat pig!! Because that is far from the truth!!!! I can relate though, I felt like that last night when I was so full and bloated and feeling sorry for myself!!!

WELL DONE with the BBQ :D doesn't it feel great walking away knowing you did not have any unnecessary calories... when I first started cohens I felt so deprived going to things like that with all of the snacks out... and then I started realising how much I did not need them - I will always do my best now to have times that I go to these events and walk away guilt free!! If you understand what I mean!

Thanks for your guidance and support Cate, I really appreciate it :D
 
Thanks for saving me reading through everything with your answer Cate, very interesting, I feel like going back onto Cohen's now!! I know, nearly through refeed, 19 days actually feels like it is too quick! I don't think I will want to eat the quantity of fruit and veg I am prescribed now...okay, not totally back on Cohens, because I am still very much looking forward to a white coffee....tomorrow!!! :hurray:

Honestly, today I am just feeling so thrilled to have found an eating plan that works for me in so many ways. I haven't gained but I still feel as though I have within me more energy than I need. Really interesting stuff this journey eh.

Congratulations on the 1kg down! So amazingly effective eh. I know what you mean about wishing we had these tools years ago.

:waving:
 
Hi Shine-
Make sure you read, re-read & re-re-read your maintenance guidelines won't you. Really you can eat anything you like on maintenance but following the guidelines is what will keep the weight off. I have to claw my way back there! It would be much easier to stick to them all along & not have the struggle!
xo Cate
 
Just briefly! Our YS is back from his trip. He arrived home 5 minutes before I had to leave to take our GS to Taekwondo & was going to be gone by the time I got home as he was going out with our OS to an 8-ball calcutta tonight! I have only had one brief cuddle in front of his old school friend who drove him home from Launceston. This cuddle was mixed with Lynx deodorant.

I called in at my MIL's & put her rubbish bins out. I think she does have cancer & she has to go into hospital next Tuesday & spend Christmas there, depending on what they find. She has 2 black spots on her bladder.

I feel funny about not getting a chance to catch up with our son. A bit sad & a bit stressed at the same time.

My glasses are going to take some time to get used to. I don't know if I will be able to. It is so hard to read with them- almost impossible. I have my old ones on now as it's even harder to see the computer with them. I just put them back on then to double-check. They make me dizzy! I cannot look slightly sideways at anything.

Sorry to sound so negative. A very strange day. Who knows what tomorrow will bring. We will have our GS still in the morning & maybe our son unless he spends the night at his brother's. We have to go into my MIL's to bake her festive cakes & take her shopping. I feel like hibernating.

Exercise today-zilch.( 1 hr to make up for)
Food today- very little & hardly any vegetables or fruit. Not good. Will make up for it tomorrow! I'll have to!
Bye for now, Cate.

 
Hi Cate,

Wow, that was a whirlwind hello with your son! Even I am looking forward to you getting your next hug!

Good luck with the specs! Make it a slow and easy introduction to the new way of seeing yeah?

Do you give yourself a guilt free break from exercise day weekly?
 
Hi Shine, I got to have a cuddle with him at 3.30 this afternoon! I feel much better now!
I do have to stop putting so much pressure on myself exercise-wise so I have. But it feels strange. I have been too busy today & can't be bothered changing now. I might later tonight. This may be the week I don't average 60 minutes per day for the first time for months!

Food today much healthier.
Glasses very difficult to keep on but I'm trying. My eyes are stinging and I can't drive with them on & I'm meant to. I may be one of the ones who can't wear them. He had tried me with them about 7-8 years ago & they didn't work for me. They made me dizzy then too.
I had better go spend some time with our son, xoxo folks, Cate
 
Hi folks, I'm feeling quite a bit more relaxed today. I have felt like I have had no spare time & was fairly anxious yesterday morning. I almost didn't go to the Tai Chi Christmas party. I'm glad I did.

Yesterday-
Took our YS & my LH to golf, did some op-shop shopping, market shopping, then to Tai Chi where we had an hour class & a party. It was lots of fun & good company. I met many lovely women from other classes. I have also arranged with one of my class-mates to go walking with the Wacky Walkers again in the new year to see if we can carry packs now that we are stronger. Plus we will be able to be our own little group & not feel left out.
Had a couple of glasses of bubbly but ate very well. Skipped most of the sweets, including the pavlova, which is one of my favourites taste-wise. No sugar over-load.
Had to go pick up the golfers & stayed there for about 2 hours. Then home briefly at about 6, quick small dinner & straight out again to Devonport to take our YS to a pool hall where he had arranged to meet 2 junior 8-ball players to practise with them before the finals of the state championships. He was staying the night up the coast with the family of one of them.
The championships are today & my LH & I will go watch them & then bring our son home with us.
I have a feeling I'm not going to have much of a routine this week. I'll try really hard...will come back in 10 mins & finish this-mum rang.

 
Sunday am (cont)...
Whoah- Had a lovely conversation with mum but boy is her memory playing tricks with her. Now I know I'm much more tolerant though & don't get annoyed with her any more. I'm learning how to steer her off onto something else. She is talking of coming over to see her youngest great-grandson as she says she hasn't seen him yet. She was over earlier this year. It is way too hard for her to come over here. We will have to visit her more often.

Today-
I'm feeling good physically because I have been eating better & feel like I have lost weight. I will weigh tomorrow. We have to head off again soon to watch the juniors' 8-ball finals. I will go for a big walk sometime today. I'm leaving my runners in the car from now on & a pair of socks so I can always go for a walk wherever I am.

I will have a very busy week again this week driving our son around. He needs a new phone sim card & wants me to drive him to Launceston or Devonport to get one but I might see if I can just get him one today (pre-paid0 to see him through & save myself a long drive tomorrow. I need to do some wrapping etc & he needs to do some sorting of stuff & tomorrow would be good so we're not so stressed later in the week.

I'll say bye for now as we have to head off again. I just remembered- my Tai Chi teacher came up to me yesterday as I was leaving & told me that she considered me an integral part of the class & couldn't imagine it without me. I told her I couldn't imagine not going to her class & told her it has given me a lot more confidence. It was lovely & a lovely day. I have made some lovely friends through Tai Chi. They all loved my glasses! I'm trying very hard to wear them most of the time & am getting used to them. I'm wearing them now.
This time it's bye!
xoxo to all Cate

 
Hey Cate,

Everything sounds great from your side! That was such a nice comment from your Tai Chi teacher.. its great she feels that way and the class gives you confidence!! :)

New glasses take a bit of getting used to. My last ones I changed the style quite a bit and thought it was that I needed to get used to, but the optometrist actually got my script wrong!! But if you're getting used to them now, I'm sure yours are fine :)

Hope you have a nice week Cate, and I hope the scales are your friend tomorrow! Let us know how you go :)
 
Hi Kristy & anyone else reading my diary,

Weight-has stabilised again at GW + 4.5kg. Not good but at least has stopped going up. I'll be able to fix that in the New Year. Meanwhile I'm not going to over-indulge.

Glasses- I am getting used to slowly. I'm getting very good remarks about them, especially from my Tai Chi friends.

YS- is starting to worry about things I can tell. Getting home & sorting out all his stuff will be a huge chore! He's at his brother's atm. I need to take him to his grandma's today as she goes to the specialist tomorrow & may end up in hospital over Christmas.

Exercise- was only just under the 60 mins daily(58) for the week so that's not too bad. I thought it was worse than that!

Mood-Feeling a bit tense but ok. Too many expectations at Christmas combined with YS being at home. I think it's stressful for most people.
Bye for now, cate
 
I have had quite a pleasant day today. I ate well. I had a visit from our DIL & the 2 younger GK's, who brought our YS home. I then spent all afternnon with him & had a lovely time talking about lots of his trip. I also rodemy exercise bike & did 280 reps weights. We then went & visited my MIL as she has not seen him since he got home & she is going off to the specialist tomorrow & may end up in hospital (probably will.) The visit went well.Pleasant night with my LH & YS & he has gone to watch a dvd & get an early night.
Feeling much more relaxed.
Hope everyone is having a good day. Cheers, Cate
 
Hi folks, I had the best night's sleep I have had in weeks & woke up feeling great! I went to sleep within 5 minutes of going to bed I think & I don't think I woke once. Ahhhh.

Today I will wrap my C'mas presents & make sure that I'm under control. I might go for a big walk first as I want to get some credits up my sleeve before C'mas day/Sat/Sun as we will be very busy & I don't know how I will find the time. Hmmm. I'll try.

All is quiet on the home front (except for my washing machine that is nagging me to go hang the washing out.) Our YS is asleep, my LH is off at golf.... OK I'm off to do it now....beep, beep....

Cheers, Cate

 
and how life changes in a day!
Ended up taking our YS up the coast to an 8-ball comp & we got home after 11pm. He stayed the night up there, won the comp & has just been dropped off again.
Our house is such a mess! I'm trying to tune out about it all.
No walk.
Dinner out- roast beef.

MIL- Has been operated on & 2 tumours removed. She had an epidural & was in good spirits afterward. Lungs not too good this morning though apparently.
We will probably go in to see her tonight or tomorrow morning as she is being moved to a different hospital today.

No presents wrapped yet.
I will go for a big walk today I think...maybe. My LH just dropped an 8-ball ladder off next to me for me to do. Sigh....
Bye for now, Cate.
 
.....no walk either!
I want my life back!

Went to visit my MIL & she was painful at first but improved before we left. She was like a 2 year old putting on a performance for the first 1/2 hour. She complained that she was bored mostly. You have to know her & you would have to have seen it to know that I am not being harsh or unjust.

Our YS has let his GF know that he doesn't think that they have a future together. I still feel very sad about this & am finding it very hard to cope with. She has sent me a very cryptic message on FB. I think she assumes he tells me how he feels or what he does. They have emailed one another today apparently as I asked him to try to explain her message to me as I couldn't make head nor tail of it. It's sad but would not work if their differences must be too great. Still sad. I don't know what to say to her. I really like her & she will be so upset. I have bawled my eyes out over this.

I will talk to her tomorrow if I get a chance I think. Maybe even Christmas day.

We had a hot day today. For Tassie that is! Phew. I'm so tired after all this driving around. I have had enough of it.
I'll say goodnight. I hope everyone else is having a less stressful week!
xo Cate
 
Hey Cate

Im just dropping by because I'm not on my usual computer... but I just wanted to say I am thinking of you. It does not seem as though you have had a very nice couple of days with lots of ups and downs with your MIL and your YS's break up.... I am so very sorry and I really hope that you have a great Christmas....

Thinking of you and if I don't drop by before Christmas (as I have sooo much to do!) I want to wish you a very Merry Christmas and all the best to you and your family.

Take care of yourself Cate.
Much love
Kristy xo
 
Hi Cate!!! How are you beautiful!!!...Thank you for the B-Day wishes!!! You are the Best!!..:grouphug:!!! I hope that you guys have a great holiday season & enjoy yourselves a lot!! You deserve the best!! Happy New Year!!!! :party:!
 
Hi Kristy and thank you for your sweet wishes. I feel a little better now that I know that my MIL won't be allowed out for Xmas day as it was going to be so much more stressful for everyone. I also just wrapped our presents & I feel ready for it now. Phew!
Have a lovely holiday Kristy, xo Cate

Hi Alta-Thank you for being so sweet & for your friendship. I'll catch up with you very soon, xo Cate

MIL-
Apparently the large tumour was so imbedded in her bladder that it could not be removed. She doesn't know yet. It will require a choice by her- leave it altogether or have chemo or radiation but all have risks & complications of course. My LH found out from our doctor who is her doctor also. She will stay in hospital for at least another 4 days or so.

Exercise-
Still zilch. I'll try to do something this afternoon. Weights maybe.

Weight-
Not weighing until Monday.

I'm feeling drained but not down. I couldn't get out of bed this morning to go swimming but should have. I felt miserable after having a good bawl last night over my YS's GF. I had a fairly late night & tossed & turned a fair bit. I think I'll be ok now for Christmas but will stay out of Facebook tonight.

Merry Christmas everyone!
Sending love all over the world,
xoxo Cate
 

Christmas Eve-Our YS's best friend arrived & it was a lovely surprise for our son. He had been a little peeved I think that his mate hadn't been able to get time off work over Christmas (he thought,) including Sunday for their "welcome home/birthday party" (his mate's b'day). He says he wasn't peeved at all.;) I think he was feeling a little of an anti-climax thing with being home after his big trip & possibly feeling that his mates weren't fussing. He also had organised a new mobile phone & plan which didn't work for 2 days! Optus hey! He is so much happier now that he is back in touch with heaps of his friends & having his best friend here with him as well. I see him as a really good influence. They get on very well & he is able to steer our YS on a positive path. He knows him very well & they are great mates.
Exercise Christmas eve/afternoon- rode my bike & did 2 sets of weights=280 reps. YES!

Christmas Day-
Was full-on but quite enjoyable. We visited our OS, DIL & the GK's & gave them their presents & stayed an hour or so. Then we came home, got the food & went into Launceston to my SIL's for the big Christmas dinner. There was the 4 of us, My S & BIL, my other SIL, her son, his GF, plus her daughter & his BF, plus 1 nephew, his wife, their 3 small kids, another nephew, his wife & their son(1 on the way), a niece & her husband & their 2 small kids. I think that makes 24 all up. We decided on the drive home that we are all over the big Christmas lunch! Well- we're having next year off anyway.
We had a roster organised I thought but it got well & truly stuffed up. We went to visit my MIL in between courses, instead of after lunch as planned. We went with the flow as my SIL has been very stressed out. We all have !
My MIL was ok. She looked a lot better & was moving about better.
Too much food consumed but I didn't drink any alcohol at all. Small sweets.

Exercise yesterday-
On the drive home the boys (our YS really) decided they wanted to have a game of golf so we got home, I quickly changed into jeans & sneakers & off we went again. They played 9 holes & we got home about 9pm. I played a few shots & it was a lovely walk. 1.5 hours exercise- yay!

Weight- Yes- I foolishly got on the scales. Ouch! I know what my news resolution will be!

Today-
My Lh has gone off to work early & I went back to sleep. The phone woke me at 8.50am. I needed that sleep. I have been so tired. I was in bed by 11 last night & asleep within minutes so had a really good sleep.
We now don't have to go back to Hobart with our son. I asked him if he thought all his gear would fit in his mate's car & he thought it would. We really don't want to drive down there tomorrow as he is having a big party at 1pm & will only just have arrived back at his home after being away so long. It would have been utterly exhausting for us & we both feel that we need a big rest, rather than a big party. I'm glad he doesn't mind at all. Also we both feel that we need to be here with my LH's mother being in hospital. She may come out after the w/e & we will need to be about. It's a bit nerve -wracking really. I'll try not to worry about it.

Looking after yourself-
I have no idea how many times I have told others that they need to look after themselves but I need to take my own advice. If I sat down & wrote down everything I have eaten in the last week it would not be a horror story but I feel that I am not caring for myself or my body properly & it is suffering. It's as much about my attitude as anything. Eating mindlessly, instead of nourishing my body. Time to fix that. I need more sleep than I have been getting too & I really miss the consistency of my exercise. I won't wait for Jan 1 to get back on track. Monday is the start of my exercise log so Mon it is. This week has been officially written off.

I hope everyone had a lovely Christmas day. I guess ours could not have been 100% with my LH's mother in hospital. I would have preferred to have spent it just with our little family(& YS's mate) but we still enjoyed it.

2010 will be different. I am going to be very positive & ensure that whatever happens I am able to cope. I will think about my plans for 2010 & list them in here. I must have strategies & plans. That's me.

My YS just surfaced so I'll go spend some time with him- cook him some breakfast hopefully. We'll pack his mate's car up today & tonight I will drive us all to an 8-ball calcutta up the coast again. My LH will play this time too. It will be a very late night & will be a big money calcutta tonight- $2,000 or so. Many state players will be there. Our OS plays in it each week (not for that amount.) Tomorrow morning the 2 of them will drive down to Hobart for the big party in the afternoon. He just disappeared again back to his room with a herbal tea. He has been so tired since he got home.
He rang his GF yesterday & she wants them to stay together & it sounds like they are a chance to at least remain friends, which would make me much happier. I really hope they can do that. He may change his mind about splitting up with her if she can keep it together fairly well & not get angry or too critical. He may see her in a different light if she is able to be positive as I think that is the biggest problem with them. He sees himself as being positive & her negative but it may be that he is seeing things a bit skewiff. Hopefully all will work out ok.

I'm not sure if I'll be back later. I'm sorry that I have not been about as much as I would like. I'm also sharing my computer with my YS & his mate & I have not been able to post when I felt like it. Sometimes my laptop vanishes altogether into his room! It used to be his but I paid him $800 for it before he left. The sound is buggered on it now unfortunately. He might buy himself a new one sometime & could get a new one for the same price really. I'm happy to keep it.

OK- he's just come back & is ready to start packing the car up so I will help do that. I am good at packing. Most women are I think.

Bye for now, xoxoxo Cate
 
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