Cate's Diary

I don't know what's been going on. I just seem to be busy, without doing much!
I feel fine most of the time though, which is good.
Sat I dropped my LH off at golf,went to the local market on my own, bought some vegies only, had a few chats......
went home, did some cooking & lots of housework, had a nice dinner with my LH, with a bottle of red wine & watched tv.
Yesterday we slept in, pottered about (?) & went to the races in the afternoon & caught up with lots of friends. A woman I know not very well was really drunk &, literally in my face about how I look. "I'm so proud of you!" I always think she looks nice. She went on & on, at one stage was a bit teary. She said she saw how my husband had looked at me in the long black top at the fashion parade. She kept grabbing hold of me & dragging me away from everyone to have heart-to-hearts.
I must admit to you now. This is why I don't have many "girl-friends". I have trouble coping with a lot of the girly stuff. I felt exhausted after this encounter. I like my personal space (physically anyway) & I hate offending people so ecncounters like this, whilst obviously well-meaning I battle with. I sound really mean saying this & I don't think I am. I am an affectionate friend but don't gush over people.
It's also hard when you are really allergic to so many perfumes. When drunk most women keep re-applying them. Most people take offence when you have to say that you are sorry but have to move away because of your asthma. I have tried so many different ways of saying it but they all seem to take offence.
Now, most of the time, I just try to get away & go outside to get my breath back. Yesterday I kept being followed & grabbed & held up close! I think people think you are really saying you don't like their perfume when really it becomes very difficult just to breathe.
Today we are having an at-home day. LH is cooking & I am going to start getting things ready to sell on eBay. I am going to the shed first to sort stuff out.
I didn't weigh this morning but must tomorrow. I really want to get an exercise machine of some sort but will sell something first. I would like to make a rule where I do not spend until I sell some stuff. That would be fun! Selling stuff I don't want. I am going to start with a 3 piece silk outfit, size 24!
Cheers for now, cate
 
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Hi Cate

I enjoyed reading your post it gave me a giggle. I did reply to your other post but something was going on with this web address, I think you mentioned it yourself.
I might actually pm you the rest.

Sam:)
 
Hi Sam, I have replied to your pm & do agree with you whole-heartedly. I just keep writing in my diary, even though hardly any of it is do with the actual Cohens program any more. It's just that I am in the habit now. I'm glad I made you giggle. I lovethat!
Cheers Cate
 
Hi Cate
Thanks for lending an ear. Yes the diary posting helps me get through the day to day events even if isn't about weight and food.
Sam:)
 
While on Cohens I was able to focus on losing weight & getting healthy. My mind was on other things rather than obsessing about food. I felt so positive about myself. Now I am back to thinking too much about it & the old demons are starting to creep back. I feel so much better when I am only eating the original Cohens food but seem to be losing my ability to focus. It is so frustrating & also means I am losing some of my self-respect . I felt really strong & focussed before. I know that I need to exercise as that makes me feel so much better but am having so much trouble finding the energy. Sounds crazy I know.
I am also having trouble with regularity & feel bloated & uncomfortable.
This stage is by far the hardest. Maintenence. Aaaaarrggghhhhhh!!!!
That's enough whingeing.
I'm off to have a look about. Might come back later, cheers, Cate.
 
My day has been really good & I am really looking forward to the 5kg challenge, starting Monday. I'm also taking inspiration from Lauren's post in her diary today. I must focus on my positive achievements.
I went for a good walk with my LH today & have had a very physical day & feel much better for it.
I'll be back tomorrow I think as I feel tired now, Cheers to all, cate
 
Hiya Cate,

so glad you are on board with challenge...yay!!

You are sounding much happier, so happy for you.

Will put my thinking cap on re: challenge and start a new thread where we can post all our losses...lots and lots of losses...yeeee hawwwwww!!!!

Chat soon

Annie Lusion
 
I am regaining my healthy perspective on life. I don't know why I get so bogged down & negative. I have always been such a positive, happy person. I hate to blame hormones & Menopause but am really starting to think that's what it is.
I have been outside for most of the today. I've gardened, wandered around with my LH & have felt much more like my usual self. I even jogged!!
I have been almost scared to jog. I think I thought I might break something. As a teenager I lived for sport & loved to run. I have been overweight for so long I really thought I would hurt myself if I did anything too strenuous. I ran uphill!!!
Nothing hurt, nothing broke, I didn't have a heat-attack. WOW!
I am really looking forward to our week-end in Melbourne. It is going to be so much fun. We are going with very good friends & are catching up with really good friends. How nice is that?
I realise that I have been concentrating on everything negative, instead of the many positives that are in my life. I must stop worrying about earning money. I have done so all of my life & I am almost 55! We live in a beautiful home in a beautiful part of the world. We have great kids, wonderful grand-children & great friends. Doh! I just need to remind myself, constantly that there are way more positive things in my life, than there are negative. I do this to myself.
I got a call today from an old friend. She was going to visit me on Saturday but we will be in Melb. I forget that I have friends who want to see me. I am so self-critical & sensitive. Every now & then I get out my address book to remind myself that I do have friends. Sounds sad I know! It's lack of self-esteem I know.
One thing I do know is you get much more attention when you lose weight. It's hard to see that in a positive light. I wish I could see it in a more positive light but I see it as a shallow thing. Being slim does not make you a better person.
I have had a bit of truth serum this evening. I find I cannot drink much alcohol anymore, which, I think is a good thing. It goes straight to my head. I ate some extra protein, before but....
I hope everyone has a lovely week-end. I'm ready to lose that 5kg, starting Monday, after my week-end in Melbourne, cheers, Cate
 
Hi again,
I posted in your diary as you were writing in it, I forgot to wish you in my previous post a good trip to sunny, warm melbourne, weather is glorious at the moment. Have fun!!

Loved your previous post Cate, it's so true isnt it, we focus so much on the negatives in our lives and barely ever celebrate the positives!!

I am very excited about the 5K challenge (sounds like a marathon)doh!

TTFN
Annie Lusion
 
Oh Sweets, I was trying to edit my post to add a post-script because we were typing at the same time. I wish I was catching up with you this week-end. Next time!! We will be going to Vic market on Sunday if you find yourself with some free time(??!!) xoxo Cate
 
Oh the VIC market, love that market, used to work around the corner until they moved us to collingwood...grrrrr!
Vic market is one thing I miss, was a regular every tue, thu and fri...oh the good old days...would love to join you but have made plans for the day. Driving up to the Dandenongs for lunch.

Definetely next time, we will make some plans.

Enjoy!!

Annie Lusion
 
It doesn't matter how many clothes I have in my wardrobe. I will always have trouble deciding what to take with me, what to wear to the footy, what I need to wear out, blah, blah, blah!! aaaarrrggghhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Plus nothing seems to go with anything! OMG!
I will have a good week-end. I just need to get out of here so I can't change my mind about what I'm taking. I have emergency Saladas packed-silly I know! It's just a habit I haven't broken.I would rather resort to Saladas than junk food. I think I hear our friends coming now-hooray, so I'm off. Cheers Cate
 
Cate...please help....:eek:

It's my 22nd day...I'm constantly hungry, constantly thinking about food, dreaming about it, dreaming about cheating... doing everything consultants say... and I'm ok with being hungry while on diet, but now I read some posts that even after the diet you have to stick with the rules or the weight starts climbing back on you...
is it true?

So, unless I except the COhen's rules of "having starch just once a day" and all that... it means I could be on my way back to get heavier?

I am ready to workout more, to cut down other food, just to be able to have my apple and 1 tblpsoon of raw, natural, oil poured out peanut butter with coffee... I mean, just a thought of eating chicken and meat makes me sick - I am eating it now, but I don't like it and it doesnt make me feel good and I'm not for all that tofu, soy thing... Can we have beans and other healthy food or just boring chicken and veggies and ...you know what I mean...I have NO intention of eating junk food - but this diet scares me cuz right now junk food is all I am thinking about, it's all I want?!?!? Usually on a diet I craved healthy food, now I crave ANY food, specially hot dogs, pizza...oh God...

So, can healthy life afterwards keep us on the target weight? Or is it only more protein and starch once a day, hardly any fruit....limitation for the rest of our thin lives?

I just need some optimistic thoughts to survive this diet, cuz I am really really hungry all the time...thanks...you're my last hope...:Angel_anim:
 
Oh Maya, I have only just got back from a week-end away & did not access the forum! Something is up if you are hungry! I think you should contact your clinic & tell them. I am curious to know what you eat & when. Do you start your day with yoghurt & fruit? When do you eat your crackers? Sometimes we have to change when we eat certain things if we get hungry. Do you eat many apples? Apples can make you really hungry. I had to cut them right down. I used to have an egg almost every morning until I read a post from someone who said that yoghurt & fruit fills you up more. I didn't think it could be right, tried it & it was!
I honestly never felt like eating junk food while I was on the program. I still don't. I don't want to sound like a prig because I don't think I am. I just don't like junk food. I'm also not into tofu or soy or that sort of food. I've tried it but cannot stand it. I learned to experiment on Cohen's. I have never liked cooking much but started trying out recipes & learned to enjoy it. Experiment, be positive, contact your consultants. Life after re-feed is excellent. I am just back from a week-end away. I followed most of the Cohen's guidelines, ate out with friends & had a ball!! Life is great. I am only 2 likos over my initial goal weight range. It's not serious!
I am a bit too tired tonight to concentrate & need to go to bed. I didn't get a lot of sleep over the week-end. Where I live is very quiet so the trams, ambulances cars honking etc in Melbourne was, whilst fun & exhilarating, not very conducive to sleep. I'll come back tomorrow when I should make more sense.
Hang in there, cheers for now, Cate.
 
Hi Cate:seeya:!
First - sorry to intrude in your diary like this...but I just sooo needed you...

What a present this is - your answer, thank you!:Angel_anim:
Well, I used to have yogurt and apple in the morning and that was the only time of the day I actually felt "full". But consultant told me to have that egg in the morning instead of yogurt. So I did. I don't like eggs, so it was like - ok, lets do it...
It DIDN'T fill me up and I only felt I was even more constipated. But I did it for 3 days...and nope.
Today, I had my yogurt back with the apple and I finally feel "full" again. And it was SOOO nice to get your mail, saying that CAN fill you up. Jeeeeze, isnt it amazing how I still dont trust myself????

I am feeling better - I realized spreading those crackers and fruit through the day just kept my mind on food all the time and never filled me up. Just when I forgot about food, I was like - oh, time for crackers or you'll be too late for lunch...and there I was again - thinking about food.
I am having wholwheat crackers that are a bit heavier, so it only comes 1 cracker and half (10-11g total).
I am still on apples. I am so terribly constipated, I keep having apples - besides, they are my favorite. We dont have mangoes here - I LOVE mangoes, but they make me sooo hungry and anyway - we dont have them. No peaches either. Maybe some kiwis, but I still prefer apples...hm...well, maybe you're right, kiwi might be bigger in value? Will see... So far I have these YUMM apples, my consultant just wrote me they can be up to 200g!!!! I had 175 g each time - always tried to find someone to finish that last "piece" I had to cut off... Just feels weird throwing food away (I guess it's still consequence from war, when you always made sure you ate everything)...

So, I do feel better - having 3 meals and nothing in between. I am having 2 apples now - one in the morning with yogurt and the other after lunch (bakec with cinnamon as desert, yummm!) and I save one apple and one portion of crackers "just in case". So far I had all crackers, but we'll see...

I am sooooo grateful for your answer and SOOOOOO happy to hear you're doing so well and enjoying your life in fullest!!! I dont think I lost any weight in last week, somehow it feels like I gained some? But I only weigh myself once a week (this Wednesday is my 28th day!!! YIPPIIIII!!!!) - if I would do it more often, I would be even more impatient as I already am...

Thank You so much again, Cate, you are such a big inspiration!!! THANK YOU!!!!
 
Internet troubles!

Last night I typed for about 30 minutes & lost the lot!!!!!!!!!!!
I was so up-beat & still excited about my week-end away.
Consequently I will only give a brief(ish) account-
Maya- I am so glad I was able to help. I had been so tired I wasn't certain I was of any use to anyone but....good! Cheers, Cate.
My week-end- Drank loads of beer on Sat, which I don't normally even like. Did not get even remotely drunk, no hangover on Sunday. Good!
Caught up with lovely friends at the footy, went out for dinner with them afterwards at a delicious, delightful, Italian restaurant at the Crown, whose name excapes me now.
Bought my darling husband the lovely RM Williams jacket that so suited him in the fashion parade. I have earned myself one squillion Brownie points in the process. Got lots of bargains, bought nice presents, spent little on myself & felt great about it. I feel really happy!!
I am getting things together, ready to sell on eBay. Haven't taken the plunge to actually take a photo etc & list but am slowly getting there. I have to feel that I am really prepared.
I kicked my toe on a spare bed leg yesterday & have badly bruised a toe. So much so that I cannot wear shoes today. Ouch!!
I am going to post this quickly before good old Telstra kick me off the Internet yet again. 30 mins seems to be the limit. I must ring them today. I have not been looking forward to it as it takes forever. We now have Broadband enabled at our exchange. I just got their email yesterday.
Ok- I'll be back later, cheers, Cate
 
Hi Cate,

So glad you had a great time in melb. Footy, dinner, shopping, catching up with friends, all sounds so wonderful!

broadband how exciting, I remember the good old dial up days..hated it!Always got booted off!

Hope to see you over at 5K..new place to hang out !!!

TTFN
a 300 grams ligher Annie Lusion
 
Annie- I've been looking but was going to wait until tomorrow to post as I didn't weigh this morning because I woke up feeling really bloated. I will weigh in the morning but don't feel confident. I may have put weight on. I do vary considerably from one day to the next. Apparently, with menopause you retain fluid. I blow up like a blimp! It feels just like dreadful PMT but with hot flushes as well.
I'm not weighing my food at this stage & not being 100% in that I'm not leaving 5hrs between & am mixing my proteins. I'll give it a couple of days to see if I can motivate myself to get back on the original program. I haven't psyched myself into that yet.
By the same token I'm not eating garbage or chocolates, icecream etc. I rarely do now.
I'm going to study eBay for a while as I'm almost ready to sell! Yay! Cheers, Cate
 
I'm having trouble with posting in the forum at the moment. I keep getting cheesed off. I think I'm a bit touchy at the moment. I feel really good about most other things thank goodness. I had a lovely day today. We looked after the 2 younger grandkids, including our 14 wk old grandbaby. Our son, DIL & older grandson then came back & stayed for dinner. It was a lovely afternoon.
Yesterday I went to the vein specialist again & my local GP, who I told I was not taking the Effexor & why. I told her I was ok now & she said it seemed to be the job, which I agreed with. I do like being at home but still feel like I should earn my own income.
Today I had put back the 500g I lost yesterday. It seems to be the norm these days. Tomorrow who knows? I think I'll stay out of posting in the challenge much, even though I think it's a good idea, as I'm not doing the original program really. It will inspire the newbies which is great. What I'm doing is really more like re-feed.
I will try to get back on the original plan. If I put on 1 more kg I will!
My toe has healed enough for me to wear shoes so will go for a good walk tomorrow.
Cheers for now, Cate
 
Hi Cate

Hope you feel better soon. Sending good thoughts your way.
Take care
Sam:)
 
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