Camy's diary

I am a bit disappointed I have to say. I did lose a pound, but based on what I ate and how I exercised I would have thought I deserved to lose 2 pounds! The whole time while I exercised I pushed myself further by saying "2 pounds this week, 2 pounds this week".

Except for yesterday I always ate between my limits of 1200 to 1400 calories, which should not have me starving, and I exercised 4 times this week, really pushing myself.
My only hope is that, because I am on my period right now, I may have some waterweight I am carrying around with me and that if I keep up the good work for next week, I will be able to lose 2 pounds next week. I really want to be down to 140 for the 6th of may, which seemed very possible when I thought I could lose 2 pounds a week without a problem, but now... it is only 4 pounds and still seems like such a big number all of a sudden.

I should really get over myself and think that after 3 weeks of no movement finally it is going down again, but I had high hopes. Grumbel!
Camy

P/s: I have just decided that I am running the race for life event on the 19th of july. I am really looking forward to train and run that race and to raise some money in honor of my mom, who survived breast cancer, and in memory of Susanne who lost her battle in march.
If anybody feels like they would like to make a small donation and sponsor me (anything from like 1 pound would be great!) I would really appreciate it!!
This is my sponsoring website:



It is for a great cause! Cancer affects all of us in one way or another, and being able to make a small difference in anybody's life, is amazing!
 
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Hi Camy

Congratulations on your loss of a pound. That is a good and healthy weightloss. I always feel happier with a loss of a pound if I think of what a pound of butter looks like. We are not talking an insubstantial quantity here. We always tend to hope for more because big number sound so good - but there really is nothing wrong with a one pound loss. Especially if you are not too heavy.

If you have TOM you will probably get a better weightloss next week if you continue to work as hard as I always retain water until after TOM has all gone away.

Nice photo of you with your other half.

Take care
Love
Margaret
 
Thanx guys, you are the best! The medical forum I am on all I got was criticism, they were like 144 is a good enough weight, you probably can't lose anymore because you are already skinny enough (which believe me, I am nowhere near!), it is just they are not very good at losing weight (we all started at the beginning of the year and more than half of us (we are a group of probably 12 or 15) have lost nothing, some put on weight (the most criticising one put on weight and she was rather large to start with), so I think they are jealous!

However:
Food of the day:
Breakfast: 1 banana, 1 kiwi, 8 strawberries
Lunch: brown rice and vegetable risotto (courgette, aubergine and tomato)
Snack: 1 sweet ricecake, couple of sips of coffee
Dinner: cucumber salad and normal lettuce, tomato and tuna salad
Sunday treat: 2 Lindt balls, 10 choc covered raisins

No exercise, but I studied and finally I had a day where my studying was quite good, I did a lot and I am quite happy!
Tomorrow I need to study like 10 hours, but I will go swimming... maybe elliptical and swimming... we will see how I feel. I need to be fit for july!! I know there are like 700 weeks to go, and I am going to follow the reebok plan (6 week plan with 70 to 110 minutes walking-running) from may onwards (I would like to do the reebok plan twice before the actual run), but I need to be strong enough to do the reebok plan! Plus I want to lose those darn 4 pounds!!! I want to be a 130íes girl!!!!
Camy
 
I have studied so/so... not to say not very well... I am such a lazy bum! I only have to be strong and study for 2 more weeks and then I am finished and still I can't get myself to do it! I am going to do 3 more hours after dinner, and hopefully have then done about 3/4 of what I should have done today!2 more days before the 1st exam!

However, weightwise it is going well... I ate well and I exercised well... I figure if this degree doesn;t work out, if I am skinny enough I can become a supermodel ;)! JK, but I really need to get my act together!
I did 40 lanes in the pool (aka 1 mile) and was quite proud of myself, I started off pretty tired, my legs ached a bit for the first 5 lanes, but then it got better and even though I had decided only to do 30 lanes I pushed myself for another 10 in the end! I think if I had had time I would have even been able to do 50. After exams I will try to push myself to do 50, maybe even 60! That would be 2 k!
Am so excited about the race for life, I am going to buy myself new shoes when I am home in may, new nikes! I spoke to my mom and she felt very emotional about me running in her honour (and she also called Susanne's husband to tell him I was running in Susanne's memory). I am glad I can make her feel good, and myself feel good and have it be part of my weight-loss plan!

Food of the day:
Breakfast: 1 banana, 1 kiwi, 1 apple
Lunch: brown rice with some chilli, 3 bean salad with a bit of broccoli
Snack: nut bar
Dinner: salmon and a big nice salad

Exercise of the day:
40 lanes swimming
100ish sit ups, didn't count them!

Camy
 
I feel you on the studying. I finally was able to finish a unit in school this weekend after two months. And the only reason I finished is because I wouldn't let myself eat until I did. That was very effective in getting me to finish, I must say.
 
Argh studying, working studying some more.... ew!

Food of the day:
Breakfast: 1 bana, 1 kiwi, 20 grapes
Lunch: brown rice, some ratatouille, greek salad, 50 g of chocolate, needed it for the energy ;)!!
Snack: 20 grapes (so far, but I will probably have teddy bears too!)
Dinner: hopefully a nicoise salad!

Exercise: nothing, too busy, but will do sit ups before dinner!
Camy
 
about the girls on the other forum - yeah ive had a lot of that. amazing how many people assume you are anorexic or sick just because you dropped a bunch of weight :)
 
Thanx so much wicked!!!
Tomorrow is the first one... I am nervous but I think I will be well prepared after I finish with today. I have planned a 5 hour study session, then 2 hour break, then another 5 hours study session. IN the break I need to work (pick the kids up from school, bring them home, feed them a quick dinner, then I can go).

I feel sick to my stomach, yesterday I didn't eat the salad for dinner at all, I ate a ton of crap! I felt like it, ate it and now I have the consequences. I have diarrhoea too... ah lovely! My friend calls it the exam shits, and says everyone gets them, but I actually ate stuff that gave them to me, so I am not sure if that counts as exam shits.

Dinner yesterday was: 1 bowl of rice with ketchup (I don't even like ketchup, but since it was there...), 2 cheese sticks, 1/2 cucumber with dip (I think that is what got me sick), teddybears, some salami, 1 hershey kiss (I don't like hershey kisses... they taste funny!)... I know what a mess!!

Anyhow, I am now waiting for the dude who is fixing our shower and toilet to come back and do the final touch of fixing, and then I am free to go and do my work. I would like to do it at a friend's house, so I have company and someone controls that I am doing the work... I might call one up.
Oh yeah also our lift is broken, so now everytime I want to come home I have to go up 7 flights of stairs!!! If that doesn't get me skinny nothing will!
Camy
 
Hi Camy

I know all about getting those moods when you eat food that you dont even like. It is much better when you binge and eat the stuff that you like - but those binges when you eat stuff that you dont like are extra depressing. The stress of the looming exams will have caused it. Stress triggers are so often there.

Ignore the folk on the other forum - medical or not. I reckon that Wishes and I know more about weight loss than tons of doctors. Experience has to count for a lot in this world. I swear that my GP knows a lot less than me about weightloss.

It's great that your running aspirations is bringing benefit to many and making your mother feel somehow closer to you.

I like the supermodel aspiration - maybe I should adopt that one too. I am sure that there is room for a middle-aged supermodel. It may be a bit of a niche market - but I think that it has my name on it.

Good luck for your exams. Stay focused and all your dreams will become a reality. We can make our dreams happen.

Take care
Love
Margaret
 
lol exam shits ! i never heard of that before, but boy do i know all about the shits atm :O
On the plus side i got some medication to sort mine out and boy it worked brilliantly!
 
I am pretty much 9 hours into the study routine and I have doen almost everything I wanted to do... I am pretty proud of myself for that. I am fairly confident that I can pass that exam, but only just about confident enough... if questions come up that I have been doing I will be fine! Now if new questions come up I will be not-fine!
But I am hoping that after doing the exams of the past 7 years (in that subject... thank GOD to the internet and to the past paper website!)I should know enough about exams to take this one.

HOwever my food has been a total utter disaster. I feel sick-ish... like as if I had eaten gluten, so I am pretty sure something I ate yesterday must have had wheat in it... oh crap! Well, can't change yesterday... but today I ate terribly because I go from nausea to hunger to nausea...
I ate a couple of chocolate balls (140 cals total) and had a fennel tea (0cals) to settle the tummy, then I had a soy latte (around 250 cals) and a gluten free biscuit (150 cals)for lunch, then I had about 30 g of popcorn (100 cals) for a starvy phase, and a lot of mint chewing gum!
I don't know what to eat for dinner... probably salad, or just veggies and maybe some fish... I just don't know!

I will be so happy when this exam is over, well actually I will be so happy when all 3 exams are over, that is in exactly 9 days! Then I will be the happiest person ever... well if I pass I will! I won't know however for weeks, probably months, so that is good in a way...
And then I can dedicate myself to running, and enjoying the lovely weather and my kids... ah all the things I will enjoy once this is over!!
Camy
P/s: thanx to everyone who has been posting, I will start posting again in your diaries after this exam!
 
Great job on all the studying you've been doing. That is important too! Plus you haven't lost sight, even if you've eaten some things you wouldn't normally. It's all good. I wish you luck on your exam, sure you'll do fine!
 
Thanx guys, I did well... was 3 essays and 6 short question, I did very well in 2 essays, fairly well in the third one and knew 3 of the short answers excellently, one alright, and wrote something for the other 2. It is definitely a pass! Phew, 2 to go!!

The day started excellently, I weighed myself and saw the magic number 64 for the first time in a long time!! I have lost a pound therefore! So maybe I will manage 2 this week! Need to watch my dinner tonight since I already have tons of calories inside of me today, but I will go gymming and swimming tomorrow and saturday and might even go for a run on sunday! I think I do better in my exams when I exercise! Or at least I tell myself.

So weigh in was great, exam was good, and then I went for lunch with the girls I study with and man... I forgot how little I like them!
It was raining and we were outside and they were all under a rain cover but it rained on me, so I changed place, to a different (bigger) table that was empty under the raincover a few metres away from them and said "guys I am getting wet, let's sit here" you think anyone followed me? NOPE! I ate by myself a few metres (and half a corner) away from the girls I shared every frickin day with!!
Then we went for coffee (and I went because I was falling asleep) and they all seemed to be semi-ignoring me (which I am sure has to do with the fact that they are be-yatches and told my *friend* whatever it is that I said behind her back), then the *friend* came too, she fully ignored me (even though I had been giving her my notes and helping her out with the exams and when nobody else is around she is friendly with me), then we walked towards college. I talked to the only one of them who behaves like an adult (she is totally sweet), I even told her that I felt very sad that my relationship with *friend* changed and the first thing she told me was "what is a private conversation, should stay a private conversation. nobody should have told her [*friend*] what you said, whatever it was"... so at least 1 normal person in the group!
However I am pretty sure *friend* was talking to another girl about me just a few metres behind us in a loud voice... I tried not to listen and to be above it ll but it is darn hard.
When I left them (to come here to college, they were all going to shop for something or other) I told *friend* jokingly that she gave me bruise (she hit me yesterday *friendly* on the arm, but was wearing a huge ring and that really did hurt! But I took it as a buddy-thing) and her answer was really really snippy: "Good!!! I am glad it did!" and the girl she was with (who until she came was nice to me) said "Yeah, well done, I am glad too!"
I just said a quick bye and left and cried all the way to college. I feel so stupid, at 23 years old I should be above bullies like that! I should stop trying to be her friend again, stop humiliating myself by helping her out, and be the bitch she is begging me to be! And I should (especially) be strong enough to not cry when someone bullies me! I feel 6 years old again.
This is it, the end! I am not texting, or talking to her, if she says hello I say hello, but I will not let my happiness be affected by the harrassment of someone like her.
The longer I am not friends with her, the more I notice how her ways pissed me off so badly! Like I always have a christmas party at mine and everyone brings a secret santa gift. Everybody made an effort and bought something (all of my undergrad friends) and her and the other girl from the course just brought junk! I felt so sorry for whoever got their presents (well I got one of them and pretended to love it, even though it clearly was junk! She might have just found it on the streets!). They are a bunch of selfobsessed respectless people and I do not wish to have anything to do with them anymore! I know I shouldn't peruse my diary for this, but I need to talk to someone, and the friends I have left all have stuff to do and not really time now that we have exam period... I will see 2 of them tomorrow so that will be great!

Food of the day so far:
Breakfast: gf bread with ham on it (200 cal)
Lunch: a HUGE salad with everything in it and a lot of different dressings (was in a self-service place), honestly from cheese to beans to tomatoes, to tuna, everything under the face of the earth!
Snack: white chocolate soy mocha
Dinner: ??

Exercise: nothing really, but I did walk a couple of miles instead of taking the bus... hopefully that counts!
Camy
 
Honey, at 23 years old, you would they THEY would be above that. Things hurt and those girls don't seem worth a rat's ass. Urg, I'm mad just listening to how childish they are.

Walking a couple of mines counts for sure! No doubts about that. And at least you ate a salad with all that on it instead of a chocolate mound with it all on there :D
 
It seems that some people just never grow up! Camy, be a better person and simply ignore her, or... :rolleyes: (i'm the wicked one so I CANT HELP IT) not so better and get even with her ! :reddevil:

;)
 
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OK, I feel much better. I had been feeling really REALLY low yesterday afternoon and then I went to a concert of my band (but clearly I wasn't in it... no time), they played great it was great fun and then we went out for a few drinks, and I had a blast with them. It was what I really needed, to show myself that I do have friends.

Today I will go gymming/swimming and then to a friend's birthday in the evening. The scales surprised me again, but I have to stop weighing me every day because that will just depress me when I get a higher number the day after!! So sunday morning is my next weigh in!
That is all from me folks for now, need to do my exercise and study!

Edited to add: no day without some drama it seems! The man pissed me off so badly today. His friend called and he wants to come to stay with us for a few weeks this summer (that is fine), and we both know my mom wants to come and stay a few weeks this summer (also fine).
Now because of our ridiculous living situation they won;t be able unless the man moves fully in with me and gives up his room in his flat (this would be cheaper for him). Since my flatmate is moving out he would cover her rent and we would have her bedroom for guests. This would be ideal for everyone involved (the man would pay less rent, I would get to properly live with him before moving across a continent and a half to live somewhere else with him, visitors would be able to stay). The man is not at all attached to his flat, in fact we spend most time at mine anyways. BUT he doesn't want to do this because he is afraid of talking to his flatmates about this (he would never say it, but it clearly is this).
So when I brought it up today again (we sort of need to tell our flatmates, because my flatmate would look for someone to cover her room for her soon-ish and his flatmates would need to do that if he moves out) he told me, he can't really take care of this now, he can't even think about it now, because it would keep him from studying!!
I mean honestly... WTF!???? He can't think for 5 minutes if he wants to do this or not?? If he does he needs to do nothing more than tell his flatmates! And if he doesn't, well then I need to talk to my mom and tell her she should cancel that trip!
I tried to talk it over, he got himself into hysterics about it, so I left, told him I do not need to see him for a few days, and left.
I hate his way of leaving everything to the very last moment so that nothing ever works out! This way I have not had any holidays for 2 sumers (he could not plan more than a week in advance... which obviously made trips impossible), we are living in this stupid situation because of that (he needed until september to decide if he wanted to live with me, by the time he had decided we had a new flatmate anyhow!), the story goes on and on...
What an ass! The world is full of asses this week!! Sorry for you non-assy people who are listening to me whine!
Also storming off I forgot my bathing suit at his, so I can't even go swimming! Eurgh! I have my gym clothes so I will just gym, but still!
Camy
 
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HI Camy

I found you!!!

This is it, the end! I am not texting, or talking to her, if she says hello I say hello, but I will not let my happiness be affected by the harrassment of someone like her

Good on you why let some silly minded person bring you down your better than that and you know you are delete her number and forget about her I had similar things at uni then i started (also aged 23!!) i dumped them and became friends with some others in my group and now i class them as some of my closest friends

MEN thats all im saying

Have a good weekend
Sarah
 
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