.....sorry about the journal...SUCKS!!!
...I know what you mean though about your family, and close relatives, and friends....I've actually thought about it several times for a LONG TIME.......and what I CAME UP WITH, was that I think it's not that they don't love you or want you to do better for yourself.....
BUT that they
fear that you will succeed in a sense, and by your demonstrating the
DEDICATION and
CONSISTENCY of applying a certain action and belief or something.....shows HOW STRONG YOU ARE!!!....the problem comes in when they see you get so far ahead that they feel they can't catch up to you anymore, and their guilt for not having
acted as well to BETTER THEIR LIVES......eats them up.
....it's like knockin you down in a sense, but at the same time, because they love you and don't want you to get too far ahead where they can't catch up......I THINK!!!
..I dunno....it could be a multitude of things I think.....
...I HAVE FAITH IN YOU!!! I"M ROOTING FOR YOU!!!! YOU CAN AND WILL DO THIS!!!